Chapter 7: Merrier

More the merrier is a saying that does not apply to certain groups. Garage bands is one such group, and definitely, harems is another. Hens have a pecking order. The struggles to establish or modify the pecking order can appear vicious and violent to onlookers. I’m an interested onlooker, the salivating fox in the hen house.

An explanation of outside city limits road house environments. Some road houses are the expected rough and tumble taverns, and minors not permitted inside. The road house we perform at, is a family oriented bar and restaurant, and not only outside the city limits but straddles the county line. The dining room is a separate room from the bar and dance floor and in a different and dry county. Passage from the dry county to the county where liquor can be sold, between the restaurant across the border from the bar is unrestricted. The two areas are connected by a wide open arch right on the line. The restrooms for the entire facility are at the rear of the band stand, and accessed by a hall on the opposite side of the band dais from the dance floor. To use the facilities located in the next county, children frequently pass from the restaurant through the bar and down the hall beside the band stand.

Our practice facilities. We aren’t the normal garage band. We practice, not in a garage, but in a bungalow pool house. An old, empty, and cracked cement swimming pool is adjacent, both in the backyard of Faye’s inherited rural estate. She comes from formerly moneyed, southern aristocrats. Grandpa was once the state governor.

Our first band practice after that freebie at the road house was sheer bedlam. We over crowded our tiny studio with double the usual bodies. Carol invited a violinist friend, also a member of the high school orchestra, to try out. This friend took it upon herself to invite family members, all hoping for slots in our band. Six, all gypsies.

The group is proud of their Roma heritage. They look just like, act like everybody else. Nothing would distinguish them as gypsies, except for their frequent intercourse in their own language. My asking what language they were speaking amongst themselves, prompted the revelation of the Calderas family’s roots.

Twenty year old Lash Calderas is the brother of orchestra violinist Margita Calderas, Carol’s friend. Their little sister, Kezia, is twelve and the youngest visitor. She plays the tambourine and dances. Tony is a fine guitarist, and a welder by trade. The two cousins, Ethel and Florence literally play second fiddle. Together with Margita they create enchanting harmonies on their violins.

Faye is tempted to enroll the three violinists into the band, which would make us eight strong, an unusually large band. Our cuts of a two hundred dollar gig, would only be twenty five bucks apiece. Cheap wages but preferable to a sharp poke in the eye.

Lash vetoes Faye’s plan. Their family sticks together, all or none. Furthermore, he asserts it’s his rightful place to take charge from this point forward. I’m just a kid. Faye has no musical talent, and women shouldn’t boss men anyway. She should shut her face and evaporate. Lash declares himself the band’s leader and as the leader gets a double size cut of the proceeds. This bold declaration incites a mutiny. We, the original five, cluster about Faye, in support of her, and laughing unanimously invite Lash to continue his path to hell.

Lash laughs last. If we don’t have any other plans for tonight, he can get us an immediate gig. For tonight. Can Faye compete with him?

Faye smilingly contemplates him. Is it indulgence? Or calling his bluff? Faye agrees for us to play, providing all cuts are equal, and she gets one too. She never expected a cut before! Strange.

Lash vetoes her cut as unmerited. What has she done to earn a cut?

Lots. She has provided much. As the mastermind behind the bands creation, she invented the name, recruited the members, chopped out misfits, wannabes, and deadwood from the auditions. It takes strength and tact to disappoint hopeful kids. Provider of equipment, amps, mics, stands, sheet music and lyrics, the drum kit, and Mantha’s hybrid electric ukulele. She also provides wigs and beauty consultation for the girls, and she paid for their stage costumes and boots. She provides a practice hall in her home, or behind it, and? Transportation and marketing, not cheap. All Lash has provided so far, is divisiveness, consternation and offensive posturing. It’s he who can’t compete with her. His application for band’s leader is rejected. She vetoes him!

She cannot have the fiddler’s three without him and Kezia, and he does offer a full pay gig for tonight. Plenty other gigs in the future.

Faye puts it to a vote. Do we want the gig, at the price Lash demands? We vote, NO!

Lash suggests, we take the gig, without the conditions, to see how it goes, then decide with a re-vote later.

We have never practiced together. How can we appear on stage, with zero practice?