Chapter 20: Thursday Evening

Kara glanced around her for a moment, then quickly dialed her home number. “Mom?”

“You’re calling rather late. Did something hold you back after school today?”

“Yeah. I don’t remember if we told you, but Allison and I agreed to do a series of toy safety demos for the owner of the store we got all of our new toys from. The first of those sessions was today, and I completely forgot that it would run later than the bus runs.”

“It’ll take me maybe ten minutes to...”

“Actually, the owner offered to drop us off on her way home, and...”

“Is her name Rachel by any chance?”

“Yeah. How do you know her?”

“She’s one of the Associations’ most trusted educators. She’s also its’ most generous one too. I was wondering how you managed to afford all of that in one go. Okay.”

So, apparently Rachel is pretty big in the local Association.

I’m not too surprise by that. The way she handled today was a good indicator of how knowledgeable she is.

Mom gave her okay. “We’ll be home in maybe half an hour.”

“Right. Those demos aren’t the easiest things to pack up. Dinner will be waiting for you when you get home.”

“Great ... I’m starving, and I’m sure Allison is too. Love you.”

“I love you too.”

Kara stopped the call and made her way back to Allison and the others. She watched Rosa, the last of the audience, head toward the doors out. “Ah, perfect timing” Rachel began as she started to pack away the table “did you get the okay from your parents?”

She smiled and nodded her head. “Yes. She gave a very glowing review of you.”

“I’m only really known ... wait a moment.” She dug into her bag and pulled out their consent forms, taking a quick look at them. “You’re Clara and Leonard’s daughter then.” Kara nodded; she turned to Allison. “And then you’re Rebecca and Robert’s eldest. That explains some of the more unusual parts of your story.”

“How so?”

“Not so much your fathers; they’re somewhat vanilla all things considered. But Clara and Rebecca are some of the more adventurous of the...”

Kara glanced around. “Association. We suspected as much from what we’ve learned the last few days.”

“Are you aware of the event on Saturday?”

“The Munch and the relationship workshop, right?” Allison asked.

“Yes, that. I’m one of the presenters for the workshop portion. Poly relationships aren’t the sort of thing that one person can truly cover everything. Especially” she put the last toy into the bag “since it’s humanly impossible to have experienced every possibility for it under the sun.”

“We could argue that even four people isn’t truly enough for that.”

“Very true Allison; but four will get you a lot closer to good coverage than even two; but without the logistical issues that start to come with five or more. For us, anyway, it’s proven to be the best number for conversations like this one.” She motioned over to her helper. “Come slave; bring our bags out to the car.”

“Yes Mistress.”

You’re right Manny. “Do you and him have...” she started to ask.

Rachel laughed softly and gave her a gentle smile. “Yes, we do. In truly public spaces, I use a particular variant of his name instead of ‘slave’. But for situations like this, or within the bounds of the store, ‘slave’ works just fine. He’s free to leave my service whenever he wants, and we renegotiate our contract every year.”

“Only then?”

“If there’s a strong reason to do so before then, no; that could be awful for both of us.” She led them out to the guest parking lot. “You mentioned living together, and that in a few months you’ll have a place of your own. That’s not cheap, and not easy to find and follow through for adults. How are you managing to pull that off?”

“We’re very lucky; my folks built another home of sorts in the backyard some years ago; dad’s been using it as his ‘man cave’ up until very recently. It’s not quite ready to be a proper apartment yet; part of the price we’re paying for it is helping with the renovations.”

“That makes more sense. Are you all buckled in?” Kara nodded along with the others. “Good. Now, where am I actually dropping you off?”

“Number twenty on Ralph Street.”

“That’s a very nice neighborhood. I can see how your folks could afford to build an apartment in the backyard. Another question:” she paused, as she navigated her way to the front gates. “You spoke of a trial marriage. That kind of language is unusual, unless someone was willing to perform something like a hand fasting for you...”

“Again, mom. I wasn’t expecting her to offer, but we would have been fools not to accept.”

“Right! She’s done ceremonies for a number of couples within the Association; it only makes sense that she’d happily offer the same to her own daughter. But you three were very lucky to have found three almost matching rings.”

“We can’t tell the full story; mostly because some of the details are not ours to tell. The short of it is that they, along with the cord mom used for the ceremony, were in her possession, and...”

“You don’t need to say anymore. I’m aware of the story, although I wasn’t aware that it got a happy ending. I knew the three of them back in college, and it was pretty clear to me how close they actually were together; closer than friends usually are. Which is why I was very puzzled when they seemed to start drifting apart, and was thrilled when they started coming to some events twenty years ago. I was pretty new myself then too, and hadn’t met Kris yet.” She paused as she turned onto main street. “I was very sad when I heard that Isabella had passed away. I’d always hoped they’d somehow get back together again, even if it couldn’t be legal.”

“They definitely stayed close; we grew up together until events in our own lives tried to force us apart. Even then, it was only myself who drifted away fully.”

“Ah! That’s part of why you seem to know each other so well. In a manner of speaking, you’ve known each other your entire lives.”

“In a manner of speaking. We’re...” Kara paused carefully for a moment “rediscovering aspects of ourselves that we’d locked away in one way or another. That’s helping immensely.”

“Trauma has a way of doing that; it’s good that you’re able to start getting past those traumatic blocks now ... rather than say, twenty or more years from now.”

“Are you friends with our mothers?”

“Not exactly friends, Allison; I’d say we’re closer to acquaintances.”

My gut says that’s not completely true.

Knowing your mom’s gift and how easily mine makes friends, I agree. But...

That’s for them to confirm; especially since we don’t know what being a friend means to Rachel.

Precisely what I was going to ‘say’ Manny. “Do you have any other questions for us?”

“Nothing directly related to the others, but something I trust either of your mothers would do if they witnessed you exploring. And I get the strong sense none of you really care much for traditional norms for privacy where things like that are concerned.”

“That’s true enough. This morning...” Allison began, then stopped suddenly.

“I see ... then this should be at least somewhat familiar to you. I wouldn’t be a very good top if I didn’t check in with the two of you and make sure you’re doing okay after all that. Especially since I get the sense that those were new highs for both of you.”

Allison nodded her head. “Less so I think for myself; that flogger wasn’t an unreasonable step up from what we own. But even if I thought I wasn’t getting a perfect copy of what Kara felt during the knife play, that would still have been a considerable step up in intensity.”

“Your share at a one to one ratio?”

“Usually with a very slight delay” Kara began, nodding her head “but yes, that’s accurate for the most part. I think we could tone it down if we needed to though.”

I’ve had a chance to refine my idea for a partial filter. Putting it into practice has proven tougher than I expected.

I didn’t think it would be easy, Manny; especially for me. But I really doubt either of you would suggest otherwise.

“As much as I’d love to have your abilities for somethings, I’m not sure I’d want them for others. Anyway, are you two feeling okay emotionally?”

Allison smiled. “Yeah. I think helping with Kara’s part of the session may have helped pull me out of my own head space; and dealing with the aftercare definitely helped too.”

“I also suspect you didn’t go nearly as deep as we’ve seen you go before.”

“She definitely didn’t. Although your shields were still up during that portion, I was able to pay close attention to them. The thoughts Allison shared were pretty typical; not the stuff we experienced a few nights ago.”

“Yeah. It felt really good, and I could tell that you’re pretty skilled with those, but...”

Rachel smiled softly and nodded her head quickly. “I know what you’re talking about. Sometimes I need a bit of pain, and his” she pointed briefly at her helper “sessions always feel more satisfying than ones I’ve had with other professionals. Some people don’t realize how much of a difference the emotional connection makes.” She glanced up at the street name for a moment. “That’s true for any form of physical intimacy really.”

“If we’re not too close, maybe you can give us a better understanding of what a power exchange really means for each of us” Allison started “because ... I’m a bit curious about what that might be like.”

“I can’t speak fully objectively; while there are quite a few things in common between the three most commonly accepted ‘levels’ of them, there are enough significant differences that everything I say may not apply to you. Still, he’s been my slave for close to ten years now, so you could say I’m starting to figure this out.”

“Ten years of experience is considerable. I think...” Allison began, then stopped as Emanuel shook his head.

“Sensei would say the same kind of thing, and he’s been practicing for at least thirty years. But he’s made it clear that no matter how much you think you know, there’s always more you can learn if you’re willing to. The true masters of their craft usually accept the humility that comes with this idea quite willingly.”

“Your teacher is very wise, indeed. I can still share some of what I’ve learned over the years with you. Slave can too, if you want the perspective of the one who’s given up the power.” She glanced up again at the nearby street sign. “I imagine you already know the basics; you seem to have starting knowledge for a number of different things...” she chuckled softly to herself “someone must have given you a good book or two.”

“One of my friends, after he misinterpreted the telepathy for a power exchange relationship.”

“That would be easy to do if you didn’t know about it. That said...” she paused for a few moments “I suppose the biggest thing I’ve learned is why people tend to go into those relationships. It’s more than just wanting or needing to give up control every once in a while; those people are usually content with the occasional scene. Nearly every submissive I’ve even spoken to has said that the need to submit to another with some frequency is what drove them to the relationship.”

“How about your slave? What drives someone to give up that much control to another person?” Allison asked.

“I can answer that” her slave began to reply. “My need to serve someone is so much stronger than my need for self-control of my life. Mistress is the first person who I felt I could truly trust to not abuse the power I was giving her. And although I don’t always agree with her orders, she’s never gave me one that I felt I couldn’t, in good conscious, obey.”

“I’m sure you’ve either been told or read this by now, but; the most important thing to keep in mind if you do decide to explore a deeper power exchange is your responsibilities as the one with the power. In giving that power to you, they’re entrusting you with their own well being; that’s not something to take lightly. And that sometimes means not making a request or order because you know following through on it will harm them.”

“Not hurt them?”

Rachel laughed for a few moments, then smiled. “Those of us who are into pain play, whichever side it might be, don’t believe the two terms mean the same thing. Our play is supposed to hurt; that is, cause pain of some kind. Even minor ‘injuries’ can sometimes be appropriate results; knife play technically injures the bottom. But what we can’t stand by are things that negatively impact their emotional or mental health.” She paused again as she waited to turn. “The same is true for power exchange based relationships. I didn’t agree to exploring a Dom/sub relationship with him because of what I could get out of it; I agreed because I recognized that doing so would help him be a happier, healthier person. It’s more for his sake than mine; if anything, going Master/slave meant more work for me.” She pulled up in front of the house. “But it’s worth it; I get to help him realize his best self.”

“Anything else we really should know?”

“Two things. First, sometimes being the one ‘in charge’ means having to put your foot down if the other person is hesitating to do something important; and by that, I mean for their own good. Like insisting they get ready for bed now, rather than spend another two hours playing a game on a work night. In the moment, they won’t like you for it; but in hindsight, they’ll appreciate that you care enough about them to fight when it’s important. Also, sometimes the person ‘in charge’ needs those reminders too. If that’s the case, you shouldn’t punish them for acting outside of protocol if you refused to listen the first time.

Second, I know that it may be tempting to buy a collar or other marking piece early into your explorations; especially once you’ve been to a party and seen the pretty pieces other people might be wearing. But it’s really for the best if you wait until you’re sure that kind of relationship is the kind you want; whether it’s only active sometimes or all the time.”

“What purpose does the collar serve? I mean, if your slave’s is anything to go by, they can be really cool looking, but is that it?”

“I’ll let him answer that, Kara.”

“Thank you Mistress. My collar is more like your rings; a physical reminder of the relationship I agreed to and what it means. I always have mine on unless I have to take it off; but I have friends who haven’t chosen to make their submission a part of their everyday life. For them, having their own collar lets them signal when they want that relationship active by simply bringing it to their Dominant.”

“I’ve also heard that wearing yours is helpful in establishing and keeping the right head space. That said, if you want to experience that part of it, pick up one you can all use if you wish.”

“What about cuffs? The kit Tony got us had a pair in it” Allison asked.

Rachel glanced at the car’s dashboard for a moment, then back at them. “You can try them. For some, just the very act of having them put on instantly puts them in the right head space; others may find that they heighten their feelings of powerlessness and vulnerability. But from everyone I’ve ever asked about it, even a simple collar does a lot of work for their head space needs.” She paused for a moment, and glanced over at her slave. “There is one other thing that might help you figure some of this out. A lot of submissives and slaves that I’ve spoken to have mentioned the power of ‘the voice’, a specific way their Dominant or Master talks to them that instantly sends them deep and reinforces it. Their descriptions of what the voice sounds like seems to differ quite a bit; but all of them seem to have paired up with someone to whom that particular voice seems to come naturally.”

Kara watched the blush creep onto Allison’s face. “I ... I think I may have experienced that at some point. Maybe that’s part of why that session was so intense, and I went so deep.”

“That’s possible. If that’s true, then if you hear ‘the voice’ again, you’ll know it.”

Kara glanced at her phone. Look at the time, my loves. We should call the conversation here if neither of you have any other questions.

I’m good, and I’m the one who’s most curious about this topic. We should thank her for the ride though.

Agreed. “Thank you for being willing to drop us off like this.”

“No problem. If you have any more questions, I’ll have some time either before or after the event on Saturday. And if you’re able to make the munch the night before, I’m sure you can learn quite a bit from the other people who come.”

“We plan to be there.”

“Good. Your folks can fill you in on any etiquette you need to know for it. Do you need any help with your bags?”

“We’re good. Thank you though” Emanuel replied as he opened the nearby door and stepped out. Kara and Allison quickly followed, grabbing their bags from the open trunk before making their way inside.

Kara watcher her mom glance up from the table as they stepped through the door. “Did you have fun?” Clara quickly scanned her up and down and smiled. “It certainly looks like you did. And if that’s the arms...” Kara nodded and turned around with a flair “that’s really good work. Was the demo portion largely about knife play?”

“I helped” Allison replied, grabbing Kara’s bag from her. “And she let us take the blade I used home.”

“One of the little dirks I imagine. She does that from time to time. Anyway, I have your dinner staying warm in the oven. Let me know when you’re ready for it.”

Kara slipped off her shoes and sat down next to her Clara. “Are they...” she began.

“Yeah.”

“Good. How are you handling everything so far?”

“You’re not worried about them too?”

“Of course I am. But you’re the new one as far as the relationships go, and more importantly, you’re my kid. As much as I care for them, they’re not my blood; you come first.”

“I’m...” Kara glanced down at her arms “doing better than I expected; but I’ll admit I’m a bit scared. I’m letting down the shields I’ve worn for so long now, and the feeling of being vulnerable is kind of terrifying.”

“I was wondering why you chose to have that ‘written’ on your arms. By pain integrated?”

“Exactly. The fact that my loves helped me find the right words and bring them to life means more to me than they know” Kara began, pausing for a moment as she glanced down at her ring. “It’s all a little ... overwhelming” she paused again “I suppose that’s the right word. When Emanuel first told me about Allison, I couldn’t help but hate her; for all the pain she caused us when we were younger, and for taking away my best friend.”

“And the possibility of him being more?”

“Yeah, that too. I couldn’t see ever changing my mind about her; but as she started to come out of her shell and the girl I remember from years ago was still there, I had to. I’m not sure you can understand, but ... she let me into their relationship. At first it was just a chance to play with Manny; and when she was the one encouraging him about Sunday, that blew me away.”

“You mentioned that last night ... I thought for sure you three were destined to be monogamous. And in the course of that day...”

“That was the first time I’d even done anything with another girl. I was all sorts of nervous about everything, and...”

“Are they...”

“Waiting upstairs until I’m done? Yeah. Anyway, where was I?”

“Allison as your first female lover.”

“It wasn’t even what she was doing to me that surprised me. Somewhere in all the fun we were having, I realized I really wanted to kiss her. I debated following through with that desire for a little bit, but when I finally did...”

“I definitely wasn’t prepared for how good it felt. I imagine you felt something similar the first time you kissed either Isabella or Rebecca?”

“Yes. I did not expect to like kissing them as much as some of my ex-boyfriends.”

“After another kiss; you know, to make sure the first one wasn’t a fluke, It wasn’t, and I was starting to get a bit confused; I was thinking ‘how can I be straight and want more from another girl?’ Apparently, they read the hunger in my eyes, because when she kissed down my body, she wasn’t shy about ... kissing there too.”

“I do want to hear more; but let’s not keep them waiting for the food. We can move to my office if that’s okay.”

“Yeah. I’ll tell them and then head up there.” My loves?

Done, darling?

Nowhere near. But we’ll move to another room so that you two can eat. I’ll join you as soon as we’re done.

Okay.

Kara quietly went upstairs and sat down on the couch. A few moments later Clara came through the open doorway and closed it. “Okay, we can continue.”

“As I mentioned a few days ago, I decided then that if there was ever a time to experiment a little, that was it. That’s not the part that really caught me by surprise though. I’m not sure when it had begun building again, but I started to realize the same sort of emotional connection to her that I did for Manny. I’m glad I was able to find the courage to talk to them about it after we finished; I may not have been able to if I’d waited until the next day. The conversation that followed wasn’t easy, but I’m glad to say we handled it like adults.”

“That’s why Becca and I proposed the new rules. We trust you three to be mature enough to handle this.”

“Speaking of Monday, the thing with Manny’s dad really caught all of us off guard. I couldn’t think of anything except being there for my best friend, and by the time we realized what we’d done, it was clear that there would be no going back to how things were before then. And that whirlwind of seemingly sudden changes just keeps coming; I suppose that’s why it’s all seemed so overwhelming.”

“I’d be tempted to say that’s life, but you three have certainly had a much more interesting one than I would have expected you to. I’ll admit; I have been wondering what happened to change how you seemed to be getting along with others at school. I didn’t expect you to have developed such a strong school persona.”

“It wasn’t just for school; that was coming close to being my primary one. Reconnecting with Allison and memories I apparently buried years ago has made me realize just how much that persona was changing me.”

“I know what events have shaped them; but if you’re willing to answer, what started shaping the use of this persona?”

“My best sense is two possibilities. First, seeing Allison start to drift away from us after the awfulness with her uncle; second, watching Manny’s light begin to fade after Isabella passed away. I was the only one spared horrible events happening to me, and that didn’t feel right. But more importantly, I was in a position where I could try to help them. And no matter what I did, I couldn’t...” she paused for a moment, glancing away then back again “I couldn’t help when my closest friends were hurting. I felt powerless to do anything useful.

So I tried the only thing I hadn’t yet; being forceful and constantly moving. It worked in someways, but it didn’t bring Allison back to who she had been and definitely wasn’t fixing Manny’s life at home. My frustration with that became anger, and that became a great source of energy to keep going.”

“That’s why your anger problems started.”

“Yeah. And somewhere along the way, I disconnected from my ability to be introspective. Manny getting into Kempo, and pulling me in, saved me from immediate problems. That didn’t reduce the usage of the persona by much though; I’m afraid that it might have started to show up here too.”

“It sort of did. If I didn’t have the gift I do, I would have walked into quite a few anger traps. But something changed today, didn’t it?”

“Yes, but how did you know?”

“Emanuel’s aura has always been fairly calm; it vibrates a little, but nothing out of the ordinary. Allison’s has had its moments of rapid vibration and peaceful calm. Yours was similar to hers up until somewhat recently; and until today, it shifted and pulsed in weird and chaotic ways. But what I saw when you got home was much closer to what I remember when you were young.”

“That’s because it wasn’t until earlier today when Allison shared some old memories of when we were young that I could really engage in true introspection. That forced me to confront a bunch of difficult feelings and memories, and I probably would have failed to do so successfully if Manny and Allison weren’t able to spring to my side and help me. Thanks to them I was able to finally process a lot of that stuff and tap into it for improv today. But doing so made me realize how much of a crutch the slightly spiky, always on Kara persona is, and I’m terrified of what will happen now that I’m trying to drop it and be real with people.”

She glanced down at her arms again. “That’s why I had Allison and Rachel scribe this into my arms. I need a reminder to not fall back into old, easy patterns, and something I endured pain to accept will be much harder to forget.” Kara reached out her senses for a moment. Ally, my love, you really don’t need to worry about me. Please, eat and enjoy; I’m taking this opportunity to be real with my Mom.

I just felt...

I know; I was seriously talking about some difficult stuff when you felt that. I’m okay, and you’ll know the moment I need help. For now though, please rest and relax; we’ve had a very busy and exhausting day today.

She smiled as she felt Allison step back into the dining room and sit down. “Something else has changed too. Isn’t ‘Manny’ Allison’s thing, and yours is something different?”

“We decided that restricting ‘Ally’ to just him and ‘Manny’ to just her really doesn’t make any sense. I’m not abandoning my special names for them, but I can use those nicknames too if I feel like it. Honestly, being able to is helping me feel more like we’re a real triad, and I’m not just their third wheel.”

“I’m sure today’s demo helped too.”

“A lot. It was a very satisfying bonding experience for Ally and I.” Kara laughed softly as her stomach rumbled. “I guess I’m hungrier than I thought.”

“Then let’s rejoin your wife and husband, and get some food in you too. I’m curious to hear more about what happened during the demo.” Clara stood up, opened the door, and gestured to it. “We don’t get to see Rachel as often as we’d like, so it’s good to hear that she seems to be well.”

Kara followed her down the stairs. “Would you say that makes you acquaintances?”

“Acquaintances? Oh ... that explains quite a bit. Even if she feels that way, we don’t. She’s not a terribly close friend, but she’s definitely a friend. It’s part of why I trusted her to take you three home.”

Allison looked up from the table. “So it wasn’t just her reputation?”

“No. Don’t get me wrong; that helps a lot too.” Kara watched her sit down, then sat down next to Allison. “You don’t need to answer any of this, but I’ve been to a few of her demos in the past, and...”

She wants to hear more about what happened during the demo. Anything we’re willing to share, I’m guessing.

And in typical Clara fashion, she’s hyper-polite when she gets nervous about asking something.

Exactly Manny. My muse, it’s up to you how much you want to share.

I see no harm in sharing most of it. She’d pick up if we were leaving something ... exciting anyway. “Most of it was pretty tame, honestly. She covered condoms for a lot longer than I would have expected, but I suspect that’s a generational gap sort of thing.”