Chapter 14: Isiah

Having another woman in the house changed the dynamic. Previously it was just the two of us. Discussing Maya the way I do might lead you to believe my relationship with Lauren is slipping. She still is and always will be my goddess. I could easily fill page after page but I admit that would become a bit boring for you.

Maya was a little more comfortable and affectionate around me now (awake). Everything was mostly the same, until we went out shopping for groceries. This wouldn’t normally be something worth mentioning. I went with her because she didn’t have her driver’s license and it would give me an excuse to spend more time with her.

As you might have surmised Maya isn’t the type to like pain. At all. She said she’s made for comfort, so spankings or bites wouldn’t be something to do. Maya does have an extraordinary amount of empathy for people. Even people she doesn’t know. Apparently, unlocking her divinity only increased her empathy. She can sense a person’s wellbeing, health, and emotional state in a glance. She went to the grocery store by herself one day and she came back in a taxi and was very distraught.

“I used to be so invisible. Few people would ever say hello to me.” she complained. “Now, I feel like people are watching me all the time. Guys all feel lust and sometimes violence. Girls are lusty too but the ones that really creep me out are the ones who are smiling at me but are overwhelmingly jealous and quite literally hate me on sight. One guy wouldn’t take no for an answer and followed me out to the car. Will you come with me next time?”

So here we were. I figured I could work on her confidence and instill a little situational awareness as we went. She also hasn’t realized, despite her size, she is stronger and faster than most full-grown men. Defending herself should be a non-issue. It gave me an excuse to spend quality time with her.

I learned after my outing today she is the queen of double takes. I can’t speak for women in this regard but allow me to elaborate from a man’s perspective. She is short enough to almost escape notice. A regular guy might dismiss her as a young teenage girl. Something will catch their eye and make them really look at her. She isn’t a teenage girl; she is an incredibly attractive petite woman. She wears form fitting clothing most of the time so they will notice her great ass or that she is bustier than she appears at first glance. She isn’t overly endowed but just large enough to fill out her clothes and show off her trim, lithe and nubile body and add gorgeous curves. When she wears her hair up in a ponytail, she can’t hide behind her hair. Her flawless skin, bright easy smile and brown eyes radiate warmth in waves. She isn’t extremely confident yet but it’s progressed to the point where she can routinely make eye contact with a strange man. That’s usually what causes the double take. A guy will notice a woman like Maya looking at him, even in passing. She will always be polite enough to return a friendly greeting. This is what causes the trouble. A more aggressive guy will take an opening like that as interest and pursue. Lauren will tell me later she isn’t engaging with strange guys in public for that reason.

Her improved figure isn’t lost on me, not at all. I love the feel of her delicate body against me. I have a theory her divine aura is what stokes my emotional fire for her. My day fantasies of her have increased since I started receiving my nocturnal blowjobs. If we’re together, she’s always touching or rubbing against me like a cat. I love it, don’t get me wrong, it’s emotionally arousing to feel her need to be close to me. By the end of the day, I’ll have a clear idea why I have fallen in love with her in such a short time. At the beginning of the day I was certain my affection was one sided. You might be telling yourself. “She thinks she is secretly sucking your dick dude and clings to you like you’re a life preserver on the Titanic. How can you NOT know she has some serious feelings for you?”

Here’s my defense.

I’m a dumbass when it comes to this stuff. Put me in a room and I can tell you inside a few seconds who are real threats and mostly likely carrying a weapon. Ask me what’s the difference between flirting and just being nice, hell I haven’t a fucking clue. I’m getting better, but I’m still a long way from figuring out women’s nonverbal clues. Unless there is a mental bond.

I wasn’t sure if this was considered a date or not. We’re just going to the grocery store and the pretense was I should cock block any advances toward Maya. She was tentative at first until she realized how effective my presence dissuades even the most arrogant of guys from approaching her. The women weren’t a problem. Reason being, they were all focused on me. More than once I noticed a woman making repeat trips down the same aisle without looking at the shelves. It’s still worth mentioning she was always within arm’s reach. She held my hand or arm and if she needed to step away then she would pat or stroke my chest first. When a woman was obviously checking me out, Maya would wrap her arm in mine squeezing my bicep. We were walking in the bread aisle when Maya turned to me. Sadness was drawn across her tiny features. “See that little girl? She has a heart murmur.” A few minutes later, “That woman right there?”

She pauses looking at a young woman shopping by herself. She might have been cute if she was able to take care of herself. She was so thin to be nearly emaciated. Her blue and pink floral dress was dirty and worn and she avoided eye contact. She pulled her medium length brown hair back in a ponytail. Tears filled Maya’s eyes and turned to me. “She has so much cancer she probably won’t live through the year. She is in so much pain. Judging from her clothes, I doubt she can afford to go to a doctor. She straightened up, wiped her eyes, and walked near the woman who was currently scanning labels of jars of pizza sauce. I stood just outside range so I wouldn’t become a distraction. Maya asks for the woman to hand her a jar off the top shelf and with no effort at all engages her in a conversation about homemade pizza. I waited patiently for several minutes just listening to Maya’s exuberant and cheerful personality charm a total stranger with the cheapest way to make various foods. At the end she holds out her hand in greeting. When the woman extends hers, she takes it and covers with both hands. That’s when it happened. Maya healed the woman right there in the middle of a grocery store. The woman closed her eyes as an unfamiliar yet pleasant sensation washed over her. She gave Maya a warm and genuine smile then she looked at me noticing me for the first time. How she didn’t see me, I don’t know. I’m so damned large I’m impossible to miss. Her eyes locked with mine and she just stared at me with the amorous expression I’ve come to expect. Maya noticed her distraction and turned to me. “Sorry honey, you know how I am when I start talking about food. This is Susan by the way. Susan, this is my boyfriend Isiah.” Susan never took her eyes off me.

The woman held out her hand in a greeting with a shy smile. I shook it and she seemed reluctant to take her hand away. Maya, in a possessive display tucked herself under my free arm pulling my hand in front of her chest. I’ve mentioned how short Maya is but to give you a reference. At under five feet, if I were to hold my arm out to the side, she could stand under it with an inch or two to spare. I can’t say I haven’t noticed she was at the perfect height to give a blowjob and not need to bend over much. I tried to think of something to steer a conversation in a safe direction.

“She makes the best empanadas and has a very delightful personality. She could have her own cooking show.”

Maya beamed at the praise. “Thank you. That’s so nice of you to say. You’re so cute. No wonder I love you so much.” Then she snapped her mouth shut as if she didn’t mean to say the last part.

Susan spoke up “He’s definitely cute. Looks like you have your hands full just feeding the big guy.”

“Oh yes, he’s really good at eating!” She said looking up at me with a big smile. Then she realized what she said and followed it up with “Food! Oh god, I just said that.” And facepalmed.

Susan to her credit, just giggled and pulled her hand back. “It was really nice to meet you both but I really need to get my shopping done.”

We said our farewells and Maya turned to me and her bubbly façade fell away with a sad expression. “Take me home please. Let’s just pay for this and go.”

We sat in the parking lot and she broke down in tears. Her earlier embarrassment was gone. She was feeling everyone. So much pain. Everyone needed healing in some way. I held her to my chest as she cried for people she didn’t know. We needed to find a way for her to buffer what she felt for others. As I held her, I would wipe tears. “Before we go home, let’s go to the park and sit down for a bit.”

There was a park across the street and several people had their dogs out for a walk or throwing a frisbee. Since we didn’t have any perishables we walked across the street to the park. Impulsively, I scooped a few acorns and we took a seat on the park bench. I turned sideways on the bench so she could sit between my legs and lean back into my chest.

“I’m sorry I’m so awkward. You’re nothing like my ex-boyfriend or any other guy I’ve known.” She finally said to me.

“No, I’m much worse.”

She sat up and looked at me. “That’s not true. You act all scary but once you get past that you have a heart of gold. Lauren told me that and it’s true.”

“I don’t know about that.” I said defensively. If she ever found out how bad I could be she would have ample cause to be afraid.

Just then a frisbee came hurtling toward us. It was inadvertently thrown over the teenage boy trying to catch it and made a beeline toward Maya’s head. I snatched it out of the air inches from the side of her head. The boy’s eyes widened in shock. Whether it was me catching the disk or nearly hitting Maya I’m not sure. He babbled an apology but she just smiled and told him it was fine. He blushed furiously and moved so it wouldn’t happen again. I noticed his new position allowed him to keep glancing at her. She sank a little deeper against me.

Resuming our conversation before the frisbee. “My ex would have yelled at me in front of that woman. You not only didn’t yell at me but you praised me in front of her. No guy has ever said anything nice to me sincerely. Did you mean what you said about being on a cooking show?”

“I did and your ex was a swollen scrotum wart.”

Maya giggled softly and wriggled in my arms a little “This is nice. The way you’re holding me now.”

“You have no reason to fear me. You can sense emotions; do you feel any type of aggression toward you at all? Ever?”

She hesitated. I noticed the hesitation and asked. “You do? When?”

“Not toward me but you do toward others. It’s a lot of aggression too. That’s what scares me. We were standing there in the store and I felt like you were ready for someone to jump out at us.”

It was disappointing to hear because it was true. I just nodded.

She looked at me oddly. “It really bothers you that I feel that way?” she asked and I nodded again. “Why?”

I sighed and made sure I held eye contact as I told her honestly. “Because, your opinion matters to me. You’re a good person and if you’re scared of me then I feel I’m failing you in some way. Only those that prey on good people have any real reason to fear me.”

“I’m sorry I’m just not very brave like you.” Maya turned her eyes from me in shame.

I turned her chin to look at me. “That’s not true. You’ve had a rough life. The physical and emotional beatings you’ve been forced to endure hasn’t changed you. Your delightfully positive personally, I’d wager, is the same as always. You might be careful about who you give your heart to but you have a lot of love to give. Your circumstances didn’t make you negative and forlorn as I might expect. You have quite literally been beaten down and you continue to rise and thrive. Look at you now. I love that about you.” I hesitated a moment before saying the next part.

“Also, I know what I said in the club but I don’t want to stay just friends. Lauren wants to add to our circle and I need to think about what that means. I want you with me, with us.”

Maya continued to stare at me. Her eyes misted then she looked away. “Do you feel for me the way you did for my sister?”

“I was in a much different place back then. Your sister never acted afraid of me and at first, I never cared. It wasn’t until I had a chance to look back afterwards that I realized the effect she had on me over time.”

“I’m not her,” she said simply.

“No, you grew up differently but if you did then you two could probably finish each other’s sentences.”

“That still doesn’t mean...”

“I know,” I interrupted gently. “I’m just saying there are obvious similarities. Unlike how I felt for your sister, what I feel for you is different and much more intimate. What you did in there is amazing. She will never know why she feels so good recently. You never asked for anything in return. Only for the pleasure of helping her out. There is a Greek word for it. Agape. It means unconditional love. It’s the kind of character I admire. I can’t heal like that without a sexual component involved. I wish I could. Every woman I meet gives me, fuck me, eyes. It’s getting worse and it’s everywhere. Right now, the only affection I want comes from two women.”

“That’s only partially true,” she corrected. “There are more than just Lauren and me?” She obviously picked up on the partial truth.

I debated my answer and decided on honesty. “There are others I’m curious about but I haven’t decided how I feel or if I should even pursue.”

Maya gave me a searching look and just sighed. “I’m not sure I could fight you if I tried.”

“Fight me?” I parroted

“That’s not the right word. I know I said I’m a lesbian and that’s mostly true. Truth is I’m attracted to men too but I’ve become too nervous around them. I tell myself they are all like my ex-boyfriend, that they are all the same. I’ve been giving you a tough time and I’m all over Lauren. You know I can feel emotions. I can feel yours. Lauren didn’t save me from the strip club. You did. She helped, but it was you who found me. She doesn’t look at me with near the same admiration. Honestly, I’m not even sure I deserve it. Now, because of you I can help people in ways I’ve never thought possible. I look into the mirror and I like who is looking back. I actually feel beautiful sometimes. My skin is perfect for the first time in my life. I’m much stronger and full of energy. You have a way of making me feel beautiful inside and out. You look at me the same now as you did when you first saw me before I changed. Then you stood by and let me have your girlfriend. She encourages me to share you between us. That seems crazy to me because I’ve always been completely monogamous. If I’m being honest, I feel I’m in a constant state of heat around you and you never take advantage. I keep waiting for the hammer to drop. The curtain will be pulled back any moment and someone will say it was all a joke on the poor little Latina, now go back to your old life.

“That’s not going to happen.” I insisted with a bit more heat than intended.

Maya continued to make eye contact and was silent for a few moments before she said. “Do you realize what you were feeling just now?”

I paused, a little confused by the question. I just shrugged.

“The idea of me going back to my old life. It makes you afraid. You cover up your fear with anger. Or fear makes you angry, I’m not sure.”

“That’s a deeper thought than I really consider it honestly. Anyone forcing you to do anything you don’t want will just piss me off”

Maya giggled a little. “That’s a very guy thing to say.”

I held up my hands in a “What can I say” gesture.

“Emotional intelligence isn’t my thing.” I say unapologetically.

“Maybe intelligence isn’t your thing.” Maya said jokingly, lightening the mood.

“Hey!” I protested with mock indignance. “I resemble that remark” Then I just pinched her nipple and let my hand linger. She covered her breasts in shock that I would have the nerve to do such a thing then slapped my chest and jumped into my lap trying to get at my ribs. A tickle fight ensued.

“I know something else that will put a smile on your face.” I said without preamble after our tickle battle.

“What’s that?” she said still ready to cover her breasts.

“Have you ever fed a squirrel by hand?”

“Huh? No” she said hesitantly.

I gave her the acorns I grabbed earlier and indicated the trio of squirrels nearby. Then, I mentally reached out to the animals and got their attention. I took Maya a few steps away and had her kneel in the grass. I resumed my seat on the bench and I allowed my divinity to touch the squirrels and sent a command. “If you guys want some food you will need to take it from her. Be nice, she won’t hurt you.”

Maya held her hand out palm up and remained still. Hesitantly, the three squirrels moved up to her hand. They quickly snatched the nuts and ate them before scampering away up a nearby tree.

Maya turned her beaming smile to me. “That was so cool. I didn’t know you could do that with squirrels too.”

I shrugged. “It’s another gift from my mother. Lauren and I can bond with any animal. Gender sometimes plays a role but something like this is easy enough.”

Nearby, I heard one of the frisbee boys refer to Maya as Squirrel Girl. I had no idea who that was but they seemed amused enough by it. We resumed our seats and after a few moments we were interrupted by a middle-aged white woman with a camera.

“Excuse me. I’m sorry to interrupt an obviously tender moment but I was just sitting over there taking pictures of the park when I noticed you with the squirrels. I took some pictures you might want to see.” She turned the camera around to show us. They were of us. Her first picture was Maya feeding the squirrels. The next few were of Maya leaning back into me, relaxed, with my arms protectively around her. I was kissing the top of her head. Another when she turned halfway to grace me with her beaming smile. The photographer caught the moment I returned Maya’s smile. The quality and lighting of the picture was perfect. I don’t like to see myself in pictures but I admit Maya’s personality was captured well.

“You two make an absolutely adorable couple.” The photographer gushed. “Have either of you ever considered modeling?”

I hesitated before verbalizing my first response. “Not just no but...” Then I realized it might be something to help with her confidence.

“No for me but I don’t want to speak for her.” I said and she looked back at me in alarm.

“That’s fine” the photographer replied with a look on her face which said the opposite. “She is absolutely gorgeous, utterly adorable and has an amazing smile. If you want, I can send what I have to your email then you can tell me later if I’m allowed to use them professionally.”

We agreed and Maya gave her email address.

The woman noticed Maya’s hesitation about further photographs. “You are extremely photogenic, it’s a shame you are so camera shy. I promise you would do very well. If you let me, I could help you overcome it. Let me take a few more and you’ll see.”

I nudged Maya a little bit to go for it.

The next picture she took with us standing. Her small frame was contrasted against my size and my face was cropped out. She didn’t smile quite the same way and the photographer hesitated and thought a moment before advising Maya. “Miss, think about whatever you two were talking about before I walked up. Then smile like you did then.”

“Exactly like that!” she said as Maya looked up at me then back to her with a smile. She took a few more of Maya with various expressions including one with a coy look and was biting her bottom lip.

Again, she turned the camera around to show Maya who looked amazed. “That’s really me?”

The photographer gave us her business card. “I’m not kidding. I think you would be perfect. You have such an emotionally expressive face. My name is Amanda. Please let me know what you think about my proposal.” Pausing before she said the next part. “If you feel more comfortable, you can bring him.”

Inwardly I groaned. Maya turned to me but was talking to Amanda. “Thank you for the pictures, they look very great. I’ll consider it and if I decide to go through with it, I’ll contact you.”

Amanda agreed and Maya reached out to shake hands. Maya reached down to Amanda’s other hand, “Look! Your wedding and engagement ring look so beautiful. I really like the sapphire blue that matches your eyes.”

Amanda’s smile broadened and blushed, she held out her hand with obvious pride so Maya could look at it. Just then I caught Maya’s attention to Amanda’s hand lowering to her abdomen.

“Are you pregnant?” Maya asked suddenly.

Amanda’s eyes widened and both her hands went around her waist protectively. “How?”

“You are! Congratulations! That’s awesome!” Maya said in a rush.

Amanda couldn’t help herself smiling at the exuberant Latina gushing over her. “I don’t know for sure yet. My husband and I have been trying for two years. We’ve been in and out of the fertility clinic for the past year. We are about to give up. I just came from lighting a candle at Lady of Angels hoping I’ll get some divine intervention.”

“You know Father John?” I asked unexpectedly.

Amanda looked at me. “I do. My husband and I have been going there for years. I’m afraid we don’t go as much as we should. I’m starting to lose faith. We just had a round at the clinic and we’re waiting to see if it worked this time. We should know next week but I’m hopeful.”

I didn’t need to switch my sight to know what Maya was going to do.

Maya held up both hands. “My fingers are crossed for you. Maybe the candle did the trick this time.”

She bent over as if talking to Amanda’s belly and gently placed her hands. “Hola bambino! You grow up big and healthy si?” she followed it up with a quick prayer in Spanish. In her excitement her accent was becoming thicker.

I glanced at Amanda and it was obvious she was only barely holding it together. This was a sensitive topic to have with a stranger.

“I’m afraid to get my hopes up.” Amanda said

“That’s understandable but don’t get down on yourself. I know it’s super stressful for both you and your husband. It’ll happen. I know it. You will be an amazing mother too. Tell you what, when we leave here, we will go down and light a candle too.” Maya consoled with girlish enthusiasm and positivity.

Amanda finally broke out in tears and tried to hug her but stopped when her camera pressed between them. Moving it out of the way she embraced Maya and stood back to take a good look at her. “You’re really something special. You know that?”

Maya just smiled and shrugged. “Thanks”

Amanda looked at me and said, “You’re a lucky guy.”

I smiled and nodded but said nothing, trying to stay out of the interaction. It was too delicate of a conversation for me to contribute. “She was right. I was lucky to have Maya in my life.” I was saying internally.

Amanda returned her attention to Maya. I don’t know what you do for work now but I could make modeling a profitable gig for you. With the right networking you would explode all over social media. I know some people and an agent for you to talk to. Your skin is so perfect it nearly glows and have a body I would kill to have. I just got a girl a job with Guess and she doesn’t have near your charm. You aren’t even wearing much makeup right now.”

“Thank you. That’s truly kind. I promise I’ll think about it.” Maya responded. Her accent nearly gone as she tried to properly annunciate her words.

We said goodbye and she turned to me with apology in her eyes as we started walking back to the car.

“Sorry, that’s a sensitive topic for me.”

“Don’t apologize. Is she going to be ok?”

She nodded “I don’t know how to say some of the things in English so I need to switch to Spanish.” Maya knew about my language gift. It had its limitations because I didn’t understand context and references sometimes despite academically knowing the words.

“Her problem was a combination of things. Her husband probably has a low sperm count and when she did conceive it seems it wasn’t developing properly. When that happens a woman’s body will reject it. Worse, if a woman miscarries more than twice then she will be more prone to it happening again. I was able to save the baby and make it healthy. I say IT because there isn’t a gender yet. Moreover, I was able to restore her physically. She once had a tubal pregnancy and is diabetic and that didn’t help. She is every bit as fertile and capable to carry now as she was when she was a teenager. Likely have a restored sex drive too. She will probably go home and want to fuck like bunnies.”

When she noticed my blank expression and switched to English “What? I did a lot of research on pregnancy.”

My wits restored a little and I thought about what she said. “Maybe that’s your calling. Help women with their pregnancies.”

She just looked at me. “Seriously? Like a midwife or work at a fertility clinic or something?”

“or something. You would need to be careful not to expose yourself. Healing every woman you see would get you attention we can’t handle. You have a good head on your shoulders. I think you just need an opportunity to shine. You have several things to think about and what you want to do.”

“I guess I will need to think about it all.” Pausing slightly before asking the next question. “You don’t like her?” Maya asked when we were alone.

“I was fine until she became casually flirty. When you got her on topic of her husband and the baby, she mostly forgot about me thankfully.”

She patted my chest indulgently “We haven’t come across any women who don’t think like her. Some are just more obvious than others. I need to get used to you turning women’s heads.”

“You could always find a photographer who’s a guy.” I said as a compromise.

“No!” she said instantly with more force than I expected. “Definitely not.”

I dropped it and a long moment of silence stretched on before she finally asked.

“Do you really think I could make a living as a model?”

“Since your divinity unlocked, your physical change is extraordinary. Yes, you are extremely attractive and you could most definitely make your living as a professional model. If that’s what you want to do.”

“I sense you don’t approve.”

I paused to consider my answer. She knew my feelings and there wasn’t any room for deception.

“I will support you and pave the way for anything you want to do. If you decide that’s what you want then I’ll be your biggest fan.”

“but?” she prompted

I shrugged “I don’t have any experience with that kind of thing. To me, it feels a bit vain. I don’t want the validation of thousands of people I don’t know to feel good about myself. Clearly, it means much more to you. I can see the effect it has.”

She still looked a bit troubled by my comment. “Did you have a big physical change when yours unlocked?”

“No, Our physical change was much less dramatic.” I told her honestly.

“Then you’ve never been the ugly duckling and you don’t know what it’s like to be shunned. Let alone be in a country that’s very biased against Hispanics.” She said simply.

I shook my head. I didn’t really know, but there are many times I wish I could have been invisible. I’ve been at the short end of racism but I wasn’t going to bring it up. “That’s not who you are now. Last I checked you saved two lives today and changed two others by proxy. That makes you one of the most beautiful women I know.”

We were back in the car having this conversation when I said my last part, she turned to look at me biting her lip in contemplation. Then turned toward me and straddled my lap as I sat in the driver’s seat. She looked at me intensely and held my cheeks with both hands. Leaning down, she slowly, kissed me. It was slow and gentle as I expected her to be. We aren’t bonded the same way as I am with Lauren but at that moment, she emotionally opened up to me. A warmth spread through me and for several moments I lost track of what I was doing with my divinity. Her hips gyrated into mine and her chest pressed against mine. Her fingers gripped my hair and she poured herself into her kiss. Her small tongue probed tentatively at first then with increased intensity. My hands slipped under her shirt and I caressed her smooth bare skin on her back. The gesture only fueled her fervent need to grind herself against me and I realized she was on the verge of an orgasm. That was when it dawned on me, I lost track of my divinity. Finally paying attention, I realized I unconsciously poured myself into her. My divinity was attempting to fulfill my emotional need and tried to draw her to me. With a thought my divinity snapped back into me like a tape measure.