Chapter 6

I was minding my own business in my wing of the manse, eating lunch with Consuela, my dear wife, when I heard someone enter my part of the residence. The lock had been picked, though how I didn’t know, and someone, namely Jill, just walked into my presence. I was very grim at this sight, deeming it a serious breach of my boundaries for her to enter my home without even knocking, but I also knew that something major was up. I had to get to the bottom of it.

“So ... I talked to Karen ... and I convinced her to start sleeping with you again. She’s happy with it, trust me. So ... whenever you’re ready ... I’d like you guys to join us in bed,” Jill gave me a bizarre facial expression, stone-cold even, and there was something off about her smile.

It was more like a smirk. My hackles were raised already by Jill’s intrusion, but this was out of the blue. I thought back to how uncomfortable Karen had been while letting me “breed” her, even if she didn’t protest verbally. Consuela had since persuaded me that Karen had “forced” herself to do that, to go through with it as a kind of “atonement” or sacrifice, but that she had absolutely hated it. Trust a former sex worker to know the signs of fakery, of course. That was part of her job, no less, with clients who didn’t excite or arouse her.

No, something about this was very ... wrong. Nonetheless, I quickly texted to Consuela that we needed to “find out what’s really going on here,” to which she replied with a “thumbs up” emoji. We followed Jill all the way to her bedroom, the one that she shared with Karen, and almost instantly, I could tell that her wife was upset. Consuela coughed and shook her head with a very strong “no” and I touched my wife’s hand to signal my agreement. There was just ... something very, very wrong about this.

“What happened to this just being a cheap way to breed, Jill? Karen ... doesn’t look too thrilled with this, not at all. Karen, tell me the truth. This isn’t your idea, is it? Nor was the ‘atonement’ phase, for that matter. This was all Jill’s doing, wasn’t it?” I confronted both of them, with Jill shaking her head in denial and Karen hanging hers very low.

“I ... I ... lost ... the ... baby... , “ Karen confessed now, “and Jill ... Jill ... wants to make another one. She wants me to get pregnant again ... by you ... to help ... keep you around, I think. None of this was my idea. I never wanted to ‘atone’ that way in the first place. I fought her long and hard on it, lost, and decided to keep her happy. I was gonna make up for it by some ... other way, not that.”

“Jill, we talked about this kind of thing. This ... this isn’t right. It’s not healthy. Even you at first drew boundaries about me not fucking Karen. Then you made it sound as if she changed her mind. I thought that her easy acceptance was suspicious and I should have listened to my instincts ... and my wife’s intuition. Consuela here was a sex worker not long ago. She knows how to tell when a woman’s ... not into the sex.

“And it made sense, better than that lie that you fed me. I should have known. A lesbian isn’t normally going to do such a thing, not even to breed or to ‘atone’ to a bi or straight man for breaking up his marriage. I should have listened to every warning signal that I got on the subconscious level, but I was so eager to believe you, why I can only guess, maybe a combo of lust for Karen, desire to give you two another baby that you could raise together, and maybe even a little satisfaction of honor or revenge or whatever.

“That doesn’t justify what I did ... and now it’s for naught, anyway. It wasn’t atonement on her part. It was a concession on yours ... You pimped out your own wife to please your ex-husband. Why, Jill, why? I feel sick, knowing that I eagerly participated in this sham. She’s not a fucking cheesecake or strawberry rhubarb pie that you can bake and present to a neighbor as a peace offering or housewarming gift! She’s a woman ... She’s your WIFE! She was your girlfriend back then when you pushed into this. And now I have to live with knowing that I helped you violate her boundaries, her limits.

“This ... is ... toxic. This is sick, Jill. Get some help. Both of you. You, for whatever drove you to pimp out your own wife to another man, despite her being a lesbian, for browbeating her into going along by some means of control and manipulation ... and you, Karen, for trauma. PTSD. Whatever you need to get past this. Not to mention any grief over losing our baby. Don’t ever worry about ‘atoning’ to me about anything again. You’ve suffered far worse than any pain you caused me by now ... and I had a role in it, although I was duped into it.

“Jill, we’re ... completely through as lovers. I gave you a second chance. You blew it. You might not have abused me this time, but you abused Karen, your other lover, and you USED ME TO DO IT! I will sign the fucking adoption papers or whatever, as soon as you get help ... but if you don’t want to get it, give me the baby to raise ... if Consuela is willing, that is. Otherwise, well, I recommend an abortion.

“But we can’t co-parent together, can’t live together ... you picked my lock and broke into my wing of the house! You haven’t learned to respect people’s boundaries, not even now! I was a fool to trust you again ... a mix of thinking with my dick and thinking with my nostalgia for whatever good times we might have had. My sentimental side got the better of me. But no more. I’m done with this mess. This is a clusterfuck of the worst possible order!

“I feel sick ... I feel dirty ... I feel ... used. And that pales compared to how Karen must feel right now. Well, Karen, how do you feel? What do you honestly want? Do you want to leave Jill? Do you want marriage counseling? Do you want ... monogamy? What is it that you want? It’s been far too much about what Jill wants ... I think that you should ... and must stand up for yourself. Don’t let her fucking gaslight you, as she used to do to me. Jill, honey, you really need to fucking work on yourself here and stop pressuring Karen to do things for you that she hates.

“Jill, you once gave me an ultimatum, so here’s mine. You can either, one, get an abortion, some kind of professional help, and try to work with Karen on how to resolve your marriage or divorce, two, you can do those same things, let Karen adopt the baby and raise it as yours together, three, sign over custody to me and let Consuela adopt the baby as hers, or four, see me in court, because I will sue for full custody with only supervised visitation rights if you continue this ... twisted, unhealthy plan of yours.

“In any case, I no longer feel safe in my own home ... and so I’m leaving. Consuela, honey, you coming with me? I don’t want to expose our baby to this, either, do you? I’ll find another place to stay, but not this one. This is not a healthy, safe, happy home in which to raise a child and start a family together. Not at all. This ... is just ... plain ... wrong,” I ranted, truly disturbed and at the point of retching at the thought that I had helped Jill coerce Karen into sex with me.

Karen still wasn’t my favorite person alive, but at this point, Jill ranked far worse than her. Karen was clearly desperate to keep the woman that she loved ... and everything pointed to her own insecurity, her fear of dying alone. Maybe the trauma had caused the miscarriage. I wouldn’t be shocked if it did. Jill had treated her worse than she treated me at this point. I didn’t stick it out before ... and I wouldn’t blame Karen if she left Jill for good, but I suspected that they would stay together for a while yet.