Chapter 11

Ellen Wagner, the twins’ other grandmother, called Tuesday evening while I was out with the boys. I returned her call after the boys went to bed.

“Andrew, thank you for returning my call,” Ellen said after identified myself. “I wanted to let you know Crystal is in town for a couple days.”

A shudder went down my spine. Why was Ellen Wagner calling to give me this news? She’d never let me know when Crystal was in town before. Was this a good thing or a bad thing?

“My daughter asked me to act as a go-between,” Ellen explained. “She would like to meet with you, if you are willing.”

“Just me or the boys too?” I asked. “The boys very much want to meet their mother sometime.”

“This is an adult conversation,” Ellen said. “How is your schedule tomorrow? Would you be willing to sit down with Crystal for a few minutes?”

“An adult conversation?” I asked. “About what?” I knew whatever it was, it couldn’t be too terrible. Dad had his attorney draw up iron-clad custody papers back when the boys were born. We granted Crystal and her parents visitation rights to the boys, so it couldn’t be her wanting to take the boys.

“It is best if she explains herself,” Ellen said. “Are you available sometime during the day tomorrow?”

“OK ... I guess I am willing,” I replied. “How about if we meet at Brass Eagle east of Gap at noon?”

“I am sure that will be fine with Crystal,” Ellen Wagner said. “Give the twins kisses from their grandma.”

“I will do that, Ellen,” I agreed.

I arrived at the restaurant ahead of Crystal the next day. I spotted her immediately when she came in the door. My ex-girlfriend was still very pretty, ten years and three kids later. Crystal had over-done her makeup when we dated. My ex had cut down on the makeup, giving her face a more natural, extremely pleasant look. Alex De Villers, her husband, was a very lucky guy to have such a beautiful wife.

“Mrs. De Villers,” I said as I stood when she reached my booth. “Please have a seat.”

“I’m still Crystal, Andy,” Crystal said as she sat down across from me.

“Your mother has told me a little of your life,” I said. “I hope things are going well for you.”

“They are going better,” Crystal answered. “The better is part of why I wanted to talk with you today. I have had issues with drinking and pills in the past. I am in a twelve step program now. That is part of why I wanted to talk with you today. Step 9 is to make direct amends to the people you have harmed, except where it would cause harm to others.”

“I see,” I replied evenly.

“I know raising two boys at your age has been hard,” Crystal stated. “I want to apologize for trapping you into that situation.”

“You have no need to apologize,” I answered. “I was there too. I know what happens when a boy sticks his unprotected penis in a girl’s vagina and gets his jollies. The girl can get pregnant. I am equally culpable as you for our situation.”

“No, you’re not,” Crystal answered. “I lied to you when I told you I was on birth control pills.” She stared at the floor briefly before looking into my eyes again. “I had the pills, but I rarely took them. I intentionally was trying to have you get me pregnant.”

“Oh,” I said. My brother Kyle long thought that is what happened. I wasn’t as sure as Kyle but had my suspicions too.

“I was in a bad place then,” Crystal explained. “My father dominated my life and made it hell. I wanted a way out. Stupid fifteen-year-old girl that I was, I thought the best way out was to trap a boy by getting knocked up and make him marry me. I am so sorry for all the harm I have caused you.”

“You don’t need to apologize, Crystal,” I said. “I was an irresponsible, thrill-seeking kid taking advantage of every girl I could. I knew what happens when a boy squirts his semen into a girl. She gets knocked up. I am equally responsible for what happened. You owe me no apology.”

“That’s very gracious of you, Andy, but I disagree,” Crystal countered. “You thought about protection back then. I lied that I was protected when I was trying to get pregnant by you. I was wrong then and am eternally sorry for the harm I caused you.”

“I won’t argue over responsibility with you,” I said. “We were both young and dumb. Surprisingly, I wouldn’t go back and change anything back then if I could.”

“Really?” Crystal gasped.

“Our boys are so special,” I explained. “In spite of all the difficulties, I would never give up our sons for anything. You should meet them. They would love to meet you.”

“My mom keeps me posted about them a little,” Crystal said. “I hear you are doing a great job raising them.”

“Thank you,” I replied. “A lot of it is due to my parents’ help. They are good boys.”

We ordered burgers for our meal. Crystal and I talked about our time together, gossiped about our high school classmates and I told her more about the boys and their lives. It was a pleasant lunch, reconnecting with Crystal.

“I have to thank you for one thing, Andy,” Crystal commented during the meal. “I have to thank you for teaching me that sex could be fun. Before I dated you, sex was something I endured and used to control my boyfriend. Thanks to your teaching, I found I could enjoy sex while controlling my boyfriend.” Crystal laughed. “At least most were easier to control than you.”

“I don’t know if teaching a ninth grader that sex is fun is something I can take pride in,” I said. “I was way out of control back then, seducing young girls and...” I chuckled, “ ... even an older woman. I was a horrible pussy hound then.”

“Older woman?” Crystal asked. “Really?”

“A young lady who lived near my house,” I said.

“Kitty Jackson?” Crystal asked. I tried to hide my shock at her guessing the name of the lady I who seduced me.

“How did you?” I stammered.

“Educated guess,” Crystal said. “Mrs. Jackson was an acquaintance of Mom’s. Do you know what became of Mrs. Jackson?”

“I have no idea,” I said. “I know she moved out of our area sometime later that year.”

“OK, dish it out, Andy,” Crystal said with a big grin on her face. “How did you seduce the married lady?”

“It was more the other way around,” I said. “I used to mow her lawn every week. One particularly hot July Saturday, she invited me inside for iced tea when I finished her lawn. She was wearing a bikini. One thing led to another. Next thing I know I’m in bed with this thirty-something year-old banging away at her.”

“Do you know the end of the story?” Crystal asked. “What became of Mrs. Jackson?”

“I have no idea,” I replied. “I know she moved out of the area that summer. I haven’t heard of her since.”

“Rumor back then had that she got herself pregnant by some guy passing through the area,” Crystal said. “She moved to Oregon with her husband and older kids. She passed the baby off as being her husband’s.”

“You’re joking,” I said.

“Did you take condoms along with you when you mowed lawns?”

“Well, no,” I admitted. Now Crystal was frightening me. I may have screwed Mrs. Jackson without protection, I wasn’t sure. Had I knocked her up? Did I have another kid in this world that I didn’t know about?

“Mom ran into Mrs. Jackson this spring,” Crystal added. “She had a ten year-old in tow. A tall kid with long, blond hair and a fair complexion.” My heart sank.

“You have got to be kidding!” I stammered. That comment drew a big belly laugh from Crystal.

“I am kidding,” Crystal said. “I had you going good too, didn’t I?”

“You did,” I agreed as my racing heart slowed again.

“I know Mrs. Jackson moved to Oregon,” Crystal said. “I have no idea if she got pregnant from your tryst. Mom hasn’t seen her since she moved away.

“You are something else,” I said. This joke reminded me of some of the fun we had together when we dated. Crystal had a fun, if occasionally wicked sense of humor. I enjoyed my time dating her.

“Regardless of whether it is the product of your loose childhood, good teaching by your older brothers, or just natural talent, I am thankful for what you taught me to enjoy sex. I know I can have fun if I want some recreational sex. I know I can be moved deeply when I make love to my husband. That is a precious gift, Andy, and I thank you for it.”

“I am glad you have found happiness with your husband,” I said.

“How about you?” Crystal asked. “Have you found that special person yet?”

“I may have,” I answered. “I am dating a great girl that I hope will accept me and my instant family.

“Anyone I know?” Crystal asked.

“You do,” I said. “I have been dating Heather Miller for the past few weeks. I hope this becomes more than just dating.”

“You and Heather?” Crystal asked. “You and your first girlfriend. You two make a good couple, I think.”

“I hope so,” I agreed. We continued talking about our mutual friends and the events in our lives.

We were finishing our burgers when Crystal hit me with a surprising bit of gossip.

“One thing has shocked me about life,” Crystal stated.

“What’s that?”

“How hard it is for a girl to get pregnant when she wants too,” Crystal answered. “I took me three months of frequent sex with you to get knocked up. Do you remember how often we did it when we were together? Senior year when I was trying to trap Larry [Burkholder], it took me five months to get pregnant.”

I didn’t blink at the admission that she had trapped Larry Burkholder into getting her pregnant and marrying her.

“I was at my wits end before I finally missed my period a week before graduation,” I thought I had missed my chance with Larry. He was already signed up for the Army. We had a quickie marriage and then both of us headed south to Georgia so he could do basic training.”

“I hadn’t realized,” I said.

“You know what the most ironic thing is?” Crystal asked. I shook my head no. “I finally find the right man and marry him. We decide to start a family of our own. Alex knocks me up on our first try after we decided it was time to start our own family.”

“Life is strange, isn’t it?” I commented. “You’re pregnant now?”

“I am,” Crystal confirmed. “I am four months along, so I don’t show much, yet.”

“I take it you and Alex are happy together.”

“Very happy,” Crystal said. “Emily, my daughter by Larry, is almost five and going to pre-school. She is so cute. Alex is a dream as a husband. I am finally getting my life in order.”

“I am glad to hear that,” I said. “One more thing might help you bring balance to your life. Would you be willing to meet your sons? They very much would like to meet you.”

Crystal’s eyes narrowed in pain as she pursed her lips. “I wish I could,” she said. “I know I would fall in love with them. It is too much for me right now. I know I would want to take them home with me and keep them forever – and I can’t do that. I think meeting them right now would be too painful for me.”

“You are welcome to see them anytime,” I said. “When you are ready.”

“I will keep that in mind,” Crystal said. “Thank you for hearing me out today.”

I never told my boys about my meeting with their mother. Someday perhaps she would be ready to be part of their lives. The day was getting closer, but it wasn’t here yet.

I called Heather Wednesday evening after I put the boys to bed.

“What’s up, Andy?” Heather asked as she answered my call.

“You are never going to guess who I had lunch with today?” I said.

“Probably some famous football player,” Heather said. “Someone from the Eagles or may be that quarterback who went to your college. Who?”

“I already know a bunch of the Eagles players and I consider Joe Flacco, the quarterback from Delaware, a good friend. This is someone a lot closer to home who you know too.”

“I know them too?” Heather asked. “I give up. Who?”

“Crystal?”

“Crystal Wagner?” Heather gasped. “Are you joking?”

“She is Crystal De Villers now,” I said.

“What in the world did she want?” Heather asked.

“Step 9: Make amends to those you have wronged,” I answered.

“Like in a twelve-step program?”

“Exactly like that,” I agreed.

“What was she into?” Heather asked. “Booze? Pills?”

“She didn’t volunteer, and I didn’t ask,” I said. “She wanted to admit how she came to get pregnant. It wasn’t an accident. She told me she was intentionally trying to get pregnant when we were dating.”

“Really? Your brother was right?” Heather said. “You must be pissed off to have that fact confirmed.”

“Not really,” I replied. “I suspected Kyle was right about her trying to get pregnant. I am not mad at her about it. I was there and had sex with her without protection. I was equally responsible for what happened.”

“But she lied to you,” Heather protested. “She told you she was protected, and it was exactly the opposite. She was trying to get pregnant.”

“None of that matters to me,” I said. “One thing I have learned from all of my experiences is to take responsibility for my own actions. I had unprotected sex with Crystal, and she got pregnant. I am responsible. Period!”

“You’re not mad at her?” Heather asked skeptically. “She stuck you with two babies and took away any semblance of normal teen years ... and you are not mad at her.”

“I am grateful to her for giving me the two greatest gifts I’ve ever received,” I replied. “My sons. Take me back eight years ago and put me in bed with Crystal just before we had sex that fateful evening. Would I change anything? No, I wouldn’t. I would have unprotected sex with Crystal even if I had perfect knowledge of everything that would happen afterward. Anything else would mean I lose Connor and Noah and that would just kill me.”

“I guess so,” Heather admitted. “It is nice you are able to forgive Crystal so easily. That is a very charitable and Christian thing to do.”

“The best part of the meeting with Crystal was to see how she is doing today,” I added. “Her mom hinted that she was doing well since she married Alex De Villers. You remember how she always seemed needy when we were in school?”

“I do,” Heather agreed.

“She finally found peace with herself,” I said. “She has her five-year-old daughter with Larry Burkholder and is pregnant with Alex’s child today. She is very happy with her life.”

“That is good for her,” Heather said. “Does she want to see the boys?”

“No, it would be too painful for her, she said. She knows she would fall in love with them and would want to take them back to Louisiana. That’s not happening, so she chooses to avoid seeing them.”

“It might be for the best,” Heather agreed.

“In other news, I have some bad news, honey,” I said. “When we set things up for our dinner and a movie night on Saturday night, I forgot something important. I am on babysitting duty Saturday night. My parents have tickets to a dinner dance at the Mt. Hope Winery up north of Manheim.”

“We could still go out,” Heather offered. “We just take them to a kid-friendly restaurant and then a movie.”

“Their bedtime is 8:30,” I answered. “They’ll never make it through an evening movie showing. They’re too big for the two of us to carry the three sleeping kids out of the theater to my car. Maybe we need to skip this weekend.”

“What if we took the kids out bowling or miniature golfing?” Heather asked.

“They’ve never bowled but mini-golf could be fun,” I agreed. “They’ve done that a couple times.”

“Good,” Heather said. “It’s a date for the five of us.”

Saturday, July 2, 2016

Noah outraced his brother to the front door when the doorbell rang.

“Hi, Noah,” Heather commented as my son opened the door.

“Um ... um ... Hi, Heather,” he stammered. “How’d you know I was Noah?”

“I’ve known you since you were born,” Heather laughed. “Anyway, I can see the birthmark on your shoulder.” She reached out and pointed to the small birthmark on his left shoulder. “Connor’s mark is on his right shoulder.”

“Hi, Heather,” Connor said as he raced up to greet my date.

“Hi, Connor,” Heather said.

“Hi, sweetie,” I said as I arrived at the front door. “Thanks for driving over. It will make the logistics much simpler later tonight.”

“No problem,” Heather responded. “It will give us more time after the kids go to bed too.”

“Time for what?” Connor asked.

“For grownups to talk and enjoy each other’s company,” I answered. “Things little boys who think girls are yucky wouldn’t be interested in.”

“Well ... girls are yucky,” Connor insisted. Heather and I rolled our eyes and let his comment slide. Much too soon my sons would figure out that girls really weren’t yucky. Heaven help me when that day arrives!

We took the boys to the Texas Roadhouse on Lincoln Highway East. The boys loved flicking the peanut shells on the floor. The twins had small strip steaks. Hunter isn’t fond of steak, so he had a hamburger. Heather had a New York strip too, though larger than the ones the twins had. I went whole hog – a porterhouse with fried onions and mushrooms.

We took the boys over to the Village Greens outside Strasburg after dinner. We had plenty of time before dark, so we decided to take the longer Gold Course through the woods. Hunter spotted a sign announcing the course’s birthday special.

“Andy, can I get the birthday special since it’s almost my birthday?” Hunter asked politely.

“I think you would need to come Monday to get the special,” I replied. “We have to go over to the church for the Fourth of July Day service at the graveyard. Dad has a cookout planned for the afternoon. When would we have time to come here?”

“It’s not fair,” Hunter protested. “Why can’t I get the birthday special?” I could see my little brother was approaching a tantrum. He could be a stubborn little son of a gun. I slipped a twenty out of my wallet and slid it surreptitiously across the counter to the clerk and gave him a wink.

“Would this entitle my little brother to the ‘free’ birthday golf game, sundae and soda?” I asked.

“That is more than satisfactory, sir,” the clerk agreed. “Would you like a sheet cake too? I can probably round something up for your brother before you finish your game.”

“That isn’t necessary,” I replied. “Hunter will get plenty of cake on Monday when we have his party.”

“Enjoy your game tonight,” the clerk said as he handed us balls and clubs. We headed out onto the Gold Course. The boys were a little wild with their kid-sized putters at first. Heather and I managed to teach them the rudiments of miniature golf. They slowly learned to putt the ball by the obstacles and get it in the hole. We all had great fun.

Connor and Noah had a brief argument. Nothing unusual to me, but I was glad Heather could see how my boys really were. All three boys were on their Sunday best behavior at lunch last weekend. Heather didn’t seem bothered by the boys’ disagreement.

I treated everyone else to sundaes while Hunter enjoyed his “birthday sundae” after we finished our game. Heather helped me get the boys to the bathroom for baths and then ready for bed. She sat in while Connor, Hunter and Noah took turns reading one of their Curious George books for their bedtime story.

Heather and I retired to the family room after the boys went to sleep to relax and enjoy each other’s company further. I managed to get a movie on the TV before Heather and I got hot and heavy, making out like a pair of horny teenagers. To no one’s shock, clothing was quickly discarded as Heather and I drove our lust for each other ever higher.

We were down to panties and boxers when Heather gasped, “Take me now, Andy.” She ground her crotch against my hard, boxer-covered erection and begged. “Take me right now.”

“Bedroom more [pant] comfortable...” I moaned back.

“Kids will hear,” Heather huffed as she panted.

“Bedroom... [pant] downstairs...” I countered. “New ... dad and [pant] ... I built it ... five years ... ago.”

“Down ... stairs?” Heather panted. She pulled me off the couch and yanked my arm towards the basement. “Chop! Chop! Let’s go, sweetie!”

I followed along. “Wow!” Heather gasped as she saw how nice our spare basement bedroom was. “This is great.”

“It took Dad and me a couple of fall weekends to do,” I said. “We did it to make more room for when Kyle or Will and Abby came home from college.”

“Will your parents mind if we use it?” Heather asked.

“No, as long as I clean it up for Kyle and Penny tomorrow before they come for the holiday.”

Heather pulled the bedspread down, laid down on her back and pulled me into bed on top of her. We quickly picked up where we had left off upstairs. I was slipping my hard-on into Heather’s velvety sheath within minutes. It was fantastic. We made love three times before falling into an exhausted and much-needed sleep.

“They’re naked!” a young voice exclaimed. Half asleep, I wondered, ‘Hunter?”

“What are they doing?” another asked. ‘Noah?’

“Sleeping now, sex stuff before,” Connor stated. I was awake enough to recognize his voice.

‘Shit,’ I thought, barely avoiding vocalizing my curse. I opened my eyes to see three young boys lined up beside our bed, staring at Heather and me. “Morning boys.”

“Huh?” Heather grunted as she awoke too. She spotted the prying eyes and quickly pulled the sheet up to make sure it covered her breasts. She turned to me and asked, “Andy?”

“You weren’t supposed to see us like this,” I said. “What Heather and I were doing last night is supposed to be private. You shouldn’t tell other people what you saw just now.”

“But we did see it,” Noah said. “Is Connor right? Were you doing sex stuff?”

“He guessed right,” I acknowledged.

“Does that mean you love Heather, Daddy?” Connor asked.

“I do.”

“Does she love you?” Connor asked. I looked over at Heather.

“Your daddy’s very special to me,” Heather explained.

“Will you be our mommy?” Noah asked. “You know ... someday, if you get married?”

“Crystal will always be your mother,” Heather answered. “I would be your step-mom if I decide to marry you father.”

“That would be cool,” Connor said. “Yeah,” Noah agreed.

“Why don’t you monkeys get upstairs now so Heather and I can get dressed,” I suggested. “Scoot!”

The three boys dashed upstairs. We overheard Hunter ask, “What is sex stuff?” as they reached the top of the stairs.

Noah said, “Tell you later,” as the boys disappeared.

“Now what?” Heather asked.

“I guess we get cleaned up and face the morning,” I suggested.

“What about the boys finding us in bed together?”

“What of it?” I asked. “The boys have a general understanding about men and women having sex.”

“No repercussions from your parents about the boys catching us down here?” Heather asked. “No trauma for the boys seeing us like this? Just, ‘Scoot. That’s it?”

“In general, the boys know adults in love have sex,” I explained. “They know generally what happens when a man and a woman have sex. I don’t expect this will provide the boys with any trauma. They might ask if we made a baby last night.”

“We most certainly did not,” Heather stated. “Any discussion of babies is quite premature.”

“Most definitely that is premature,” I agreed. “I’ll grab a robe and go find our clothing.” I laughed. “We seem to have misplaced them last night. Why don’t you use the shower down here and get cleaned up for church?”

“I can do that,” Heather agreed. I grabbed one of the spare robes we left down in the basement for Kyle, Penny, Will or Abby when they used this bedroom. The little kids were happily crunching away on their breakfast cereal when I got upstairs. Mom gave me a disapproving look and mouthed the words, “the lock?”