Chapter 24: Home and Work – Part 2

What About The Wedding

We started the company.

We called it A2Z Computer Logistics. The day we opened our doors, we had visits from our old company’s top eight clients, and we were immediately fiscally sound. Our sales department, Jos and Lissa, set up a meeting with several more potential clients for James and I. We showed them our software and what it could do. They asked if we could make it do some other things. James and I had been working hard and, with the help of the rumor mill, we had gleaned several features that the old software didn’t have that the top clients wanted.

James clicked a few icons and several of the requested functions popped up and several faces broke into big smiles. Jos and Lissa told our new clients that we could try to add functions but made no promises. We did, however, promise that we wouldn’t charge them for new versions until they had time to proof them, and try to break them. Lissa asked that if they liked the software that they please spread the word to others. Our new clients were hesitant because they knew they had an advantage using our software when their competitors were still using our old company’s product.

Tasha had been creating really funny and memorable ads for radio for our coming out week. She also made sure that we had a very strong presence on the web and in social media. She flooded the area radio stations with some goofy and catchy jingles to the point that by the time we opened our doors for new, untargeted clients, people were heard at bars and restaurants humming our jingles and using our catch phrases.

Sasha had worked her butt off putting together a great policy and procedures manual. She was going through every resource she could find, to make sure that her HR procedures met the rules and regulations and laws. She was so proud when she hired James as our first official employee that she wanted to celebrate by having our first “Bring No Clothes To Work” Friday. I overruled that. He hadn’t been with the old company long enough to have any funds in his retirement account, so he didn’t have any money to buy into our start up, but we took care of him because he had tremendous sweat equity from our software work together.

Gail and Diana worked very hard to make sure that the lines of communication were always open and that all of the departments always talked to the other. Of course, the fact that we met for dinner every night after work made it easier, as well as the fact that our office was only four rooms and a 1000 square feet. But their actions established a culture that would make our great little company a great big company someday.

James and I had made all of the computer purchases and we spent a hell of a lot of money to make sure we had top of the line equipment sitting at our stations. We were going to be able to compete with companies with much larger IT sections. Partially because we were smart and partially because we were too dumb to not know we couldn’t do something.

James and Lissa seemed to be getting friendly and whenever we met for dinner, they always sat very close together. Sasha and I were always together and often walked into each other’s rooms just to give a kiss or a touch. Screams of sexual harassment were often heard when Sasha and I kissed, or for that matter when Tasha and Jos kissed.

Our company was a big family, thanks mainly to the two weeks we had spent at camp, minus James and Gail, of course. Once you’ve had sex with everyone and spent time just being naked it was easy to have a loose work environment. And yet, we were highly professional and focused on the goal of being multi-millionaires before our ten-year projection.

Out in the real world, Sasha and I were deeply in love. After she had moved in with me, we never wore clothes around the apartment. Every time we were within reach, we were touching. I would run my hands through her jet black straight pubic hair or spread my fingers and run my hand over and strum one of her nipples, letting it bend and rebound between each finger.

One month before our wedding, I had just given Sasha’s right nipple a playful pinch when I notice that she winced.

“Sasha, are you OK?”

“Mick, don’t be mad.”

“Mad about what?”

“My breasts have been feeling tender and I have been feeling a bit crampy.”

“Are you sick?”

“God, you are such a guy! Yeah, I think I am sick.

“Have you been to the doctor? Do I need to make an appointment?”

“I love you, Mick.”

“Me too, are you OK?” I was so worried.

“Yes, but ... I ... um ... think that I might be ... just a little ... pregnant.”

“Oh. OK ... WHAT!?”

“Relax, my love. I went off my pills, but I thought that it would take longer for them to wear off. I figured that you would get me knocked up on the honeymoon not a month before.”

“Have you made an appointment with your doctor?”

“Not yet. I just began to feel like this over the past couple of days.”

There was a lot of kissing and touching and licking and for the first time in a long time I fondled her non-breasts instead of just paying attention to her fantastic nipples. I had noticed that they were slightly swollen and while I was pressing on her right breast, I felt something.

“Sasha, hold still and raise your arm over your head.”

She did and I pressed with the flat of my fingers and felt ... lumps.

“Sasha, feel this.”

“What? Oh.”

“I think we better get you into the doctor right away. Let’s go now. Call your doctor and see if she can see you on a Saturday.”

Sasha called her Ob/Gyn and she referred us to the emergency room at St. Luke’s. Her doctor and another, a Dr. Manley, were there when they did the mammogram, not easy with almost non-existent breasts. When all was said and done, they determined that Sasha had breast tumors and they made an appointment for her to have a biopsy done on Monday morning.

The rest of Saturday and all of Sunday was spent cuddling, and silently being scared to death, but not wanting to scare the other. I know what I was scared of, but I couldn’t talk about it, not to my love. On Monday morning, we walked into the hospital’s radiology department about twenty minutes early, in case there was paperwork. We had a new group insurance policy thanks to Sasha and her foresight. With the fast start on opening day, we were able to have our insurance kick in right away. Sasha filled out all the forms and I rubbed her back.

Sasha went into the exam room and I sat in the waiting room fighting myself to not be scared to death. I wished that there was someone there that I could talk to. Sasha had her doctor, but I was in the dark, and I was unaware of the fears and worries that Sasha was going to be going through. And, of course, I had no idea how to handle my own fears.

When Sasha came out, she said that the doctor was going to call her as soon as the results were available. At that time, she and I would talk to the doctor about our options. I asked the nurse if there was a resource or support group for husbands. She took us to a small kiosk and showed us brochures for various groups that help cancer patients and their caregivers.

We went back to work and spent a lot of time touching and caring for the other. Sometimes Sasha would come to me in the office and just sit in my lap and cry. Sometimes I did the same to her. Our friends were special during the week. There was a lot of love in our office. James said on one day that he kind of felt like a guy on the outside looking in. Lissa made him feel more like a part of the family.

A week later on Tuesday afternoon Sasha walked into the computer room and she sat on my lap and cried. She sobbed for several minutes before she choked out some words.

“Mick.”

“Yes, my love.”

“The doctor just called and wants to see us as soon as possible. Can you come with me right now?”

“Of course. Give me a few minutes to shut down my computer.”

I let the others know that we would be gone for some time, maybe the rest of the day. Sasha was waiting for me in the parking garage and clung to me when I got close to her. We went to our car and I drove over to the doctor’s office next to the hospital. The office receptionist had Sasha sign in and take a seat in the waiting area. We held hands and I prayed.

“Sasha?” The nurse announced from the open door.

“Yes,” she answered quietly.

We got up and followed the nurse. She did all of the normal stuff with Sasha, taking her weight, height, blood pressure, etc. We were in the exam room for about ten minutes when her doctor came in.

“Hi, Sasha.”

“Hi, Doctor Manley. This is my fiancé Mick.”

“Hello Mick. Sasha there is no easy way to say this, but you have cancer. We need to go in and surgically try to remove the tumor if we can and see if it has spread. The early indicators are that it may have. I would like to get you in tomorrow morning and see what course of action we have to take.”

“OK.”

“Doctor, what can you tell Sasha and me about the cancer right now? The more we know the less things she and I will make up in our minds. She doesn’t need to be worried down with a ton of ‘what if’s’ from a lack of info.”

The doctor walked us through the results and told us that the cancer seemed to be one of the more aggressive types, but there was no hard evidence of that. He outlined the treatment options depending on the type of cancer and if it had spread or if it was localized.

“Shit! What irony! A woman with no tits, gets breast cancer. You would have thought it would be nipple cancer,” Sasha tried to joke. I laughed, but it was a nervous laugh.

The doctor gave us a pile of brochures and information and locations on the web for even more info before we left the office and went home.

On Wednesday morning I walked Sasha into the hospital and kissed her as they got her ready for surgery. I had just sat down in one of the more comfortable chairs in the waiting area when I felt a touch on my shoulder.

“Hi, lover.”

“Hi, Di. What are you doing here?”

“I didn’t think that you needed to be alone right now. The waiting and not knowing has got to be rough.”

She sat down in the chair next to me and we held hands and talked about our hopes and dreams for the future. Diana filled me in on the progress of the wedding plans and how Lissa was pissed that she might not get to have the bachelorette party she wanted. The time passed quickly and before we knew it a nurse came out and asked for Mr. O’Dell.

“That’s me.”

“Mrs. O’Dell is out of surgery and on her way to the post op ward. You should be able to see her in her room in about thirty minutes.”

“She is not Mrs. O’Dell yet. The wedding is next month.”

“Oh, good for you. Would you like me to take you to her room?”

“Yes, please. This is Diana, she is a mutual friend, can she come along?”

“I’m afraid not. You are the only one that can be in her room right now.”

“It’s OK, Mick. I’ll be back. Call me and let me know what’s going on. Do you need me to come by the apartment and make you dinner?”

“No mother! I can take care of myself.”

Diana smirked, gave me a peck on the lips as we separated, and I followed the nurse. She led me to a room with no bed.

“Go ahead and take a seat, they should roll her in a few minutes from now.”

I had to ask. “Is that a few ‘real’ minutes or a few ‘hospital’ minutes?”

The nurse smiled and chuckled.

“Probably hospital minutes,” she answered with a wrinkle to her nose.

I sat in the chair and in about fifteen minutes a nurse came in pushing a bed with Sasha in it. She was all covered up and had a hair net on and a face mask. The nurse told me to put on one of the masks in the dispenser.

“Please put on a mask. Hospitals are where all the germs and infections are. Let’s not take any chances, OK?” She made sure that her expression told me it wasn’t an option.

“OK. Can you tell me anything about the surgery?”

“Sorry. I just wheel them in. The doctor usually comes in after giving the patient time to wake up. One of the hospital volunteers will be by in a bit with a pitcher of water. If you need food, ask at the nurse’s station and they will give you directions to the cafeteria.”

“Thank you.”

She smiled and left. There was no indication from the nurse of good or bad news. I just sat in my chair and watched my small, soon-to-be wife lay there. She looked smaller than normal. I sat there and ran all the good memories from our vacation through my head and the plans for the honeymoon in the mountains. I couldn’t wait to see her doing naked snow angels and how the cold mountain air would affect her magical nipples. That made me think of her situation and worry even more.

If they had to do a mastectomy, how could they when she had no breasts? I was worried and afraid and was deep in thought when her doctor walked in.

“Hello. I’m Doctor Bard. May I ask your name?”

“Hi, I’m Mick O’Dell, Sasha’s fiancé.”

“She should be coming around soon. I will be back in a few minutes.”

He walked out and as soon as the door closed, I heard a weak voice.

“Mick?”

“Yes, Sasha. I’m here.”

She pulled her hand out from under the covers and held it out. I took it and she tried to squeeze my hand but was too weak and groggy. I stood there and held her hand all the while that she was waking up from the anesthetic.

“Nice mask ... I’m thirsty, Mick.”

“Let me call the nurse.”

I hit the call button and in a few minutes the nurse came in.

“Hi, Sasha says that she is thirsty. I didn’t know if I should give her any water or not.”

“You shouldn’t. Let me get her some ice chips to suck on.”

She left and returned pretty fast with a cup of ice. I gave a chip to Sasha and she almost rolled her eyes back in her head out of relief. I sat next to her bed and held her hand.

“Have they told you anything?” She asked with a stronger voice.

“No lover. The doctor came in, but you were still out. He’ll be back later.”

We sat in silence and held hands until the doctor came back in.

“Hi, Mrs. O’Dell.”

“What?” Sasha was surprised by the new title.

“Doctor we are not married yet. The wedding is next month,” I said.

“Oh. Well we need to get this chart changed. What is your last name, please?”

“It’s Orlovsky.”

“Sasha Orlovsky?” He asked checking out her definite Asian features.

“Mom was Japanese, dad wasn’t!” She chuckled.

“I’ll make sure that gets straightened out. Now then, your surgery. Nothing I have to tell you is good. When we went into the area around the breast, we saw the tumors and they were grown right into the surrounding tissue. The cancer you have appears to be the most aggressive we know of. It is called triple negative cancer. I am going to guess from my past experience that the cancer has spread to other parts of your body. That would explain the cramping and tenderness in other areas. We will need to do a few more tests to determine the extent of the spread.”

The room was quiet, so quiet. I finally was able to speak.

“What does this mean? If it has spread out, what does it mean?”

“I don’t want to hazard a guess there. I’ve ordered a CT Scan and they’ll come to get you shortly. When we have the results, we can make a plan. I’m sorry that I can’t tell you more.”

“Mick? What about the wedding?”

“What about it? We have it.”

Sasha squeezed my hand more firmly and kissed it.

“Sasha, Diana was here and asked that I call her as soon as we heard anything. I think I should.”

“Yeah, do that.”

Another nurse walked in and got Sasha into a wheelchair and took her to get scanned. I walked out of the room and pushed Diana’s speed dial button.

“Hi, Mick.”

“Hi, Di. It’s cancer. The doc says that he thinks that it has spread, and it seems to be the most aggressive type, something called triple negative. We don’t know any more. The doctor has to do more tests to find out if it has spread and how much. Then we need to find out about the treatment.”

“Damn, Mick. What about the wedding?”

“We still do it. Absolutely. I may have to change the honeymoon, but the wedding goes on.”

“OK, keep me informed. It could be that we need to speed it up or we need to make it smaller. We’ll do whatever we have to do to get you two married.”

“Thanks Di. Sasha will be so happy. We love you.”

“I love both of you too. Tell Sasha I said that. Call me if you need me. I will call the others and let them know what is going on.”

“Thanks Di. Please tell them, no pity parties. We are going to fight this. We are going to fight this hard.”

“I’ll let everyone know. I love you, Mick.”

“I love you too, Di.”

I walked back into Sasha’s room and sat in the chair to wait for her return. I must have been there for about an hour when the nurse rolled my love back in. Sasha and the nurse gave no indication about the CT Scan results.

“Mr. O’Dell it will take about an hour for the radiologist and the oncologist to look over the results of the test. Just relax until they come in.”