Chapter 4

Jason’s mom asked, “What were you and Stephanie up to last night?”

Surprised, Jason glanced up from his bowl of cereal and caught Mom and Dad sharing odd grins. Best to play dumb. “Mmm? What?”

“While you were in the shower, I put a load of your clothes in the washing machine. The clothes you wore yesterday looked like you rolled around in the grass. If Stephanie looked the same, she might have some explaining to do.”

Dad chuckled.

“I teased her, and she chased me. We wrestled a little. She’s a lot stronger than she looks.”

“I trust you behaved yourself?” Dad asked.

In Dad’s world, misbehaving covered a lot of ground. Doing so with a girl narrowed it down to just one possibility. Mom and Dad both waited, and their intense regard made him lightheaded. “Do we really have to talk about this?” he pleaded.

“Shirley? Dad asked, with one raised eyebrow.

“We can discuss it later,” she replied.

Jason exhaled.

Mom tapped a finger on the table. “There is something else we need to talk about. Have you sent the invitations for your birthday party?”

Crap! He’d forgotten. “Not yet.”

“I think,” Dad said, “You should skip today’s visit with Stephanie. At least until you get those emails finished.”

Once Dad took a stance, he didn’t like to change his mind. Unless Jason had a clever counterargument. Dad, the lawyer, loved a good debate. The problem was he didn’t have a good argument. He gave it his best shot. “What if I only want to invite Stephanie?”

Mom and Dad exchanged a glance, engaging in their silent communication. Mom turned back to Jason and said, “Wouldn’t ‘Nerd Boy, the untouchable’ want his friends to meet Stephanie?

Jason swallowed. They knew about his nickname!

Following up, Dad said, “That one boy, what’s his name? Corey?” Mom nodded to Dad. “He’s the bully who started that ‘Nerd Boy’ nonsense. Make sure you invite him.”

Later that morning, Jason sat at his desk, exchanging texts with Stephanie, and writing invitations. A knock on his door frame took him by surprise.

Mom said, “Your father wants to talk to you—in his office.”

With the words, “in his office,” Jason’s stomach clenched. No one entered Dad’s home office without an invitation. Only official and often unpleasant conversations took place in there. Given the timing, it had to be about Stephanie. He tapped out a quick message, “I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Unease built as he trudged downstairs.

Dad sat behind his desk. He glanced up and smiled. “Close the door and have a seat. I’ll be right with you.” While Dad busied himself, Jason studied the framed pictures of him and mom hanging on the wall. There always seemed to be one or two new snapshots. Finally, Dad finished. “When I acquired my first girlfriend, your grandfather talked to me, just like I’m doing with you.”

Jason nodded.

“There are two rules you never break. The first is to always treat your girlfriends with respect. Never push for something they’re unwilling to give. My law firm defends a lot of creeps who don’t respect the word, ‘No.’ Second, don’t surprise your mother and me with a grandchild. I expect you to be smart.”

“Dad! We’re not ... I mean, we haven’t. Look, it doesn’t matter anyway ‘cause she’s not that kind of girl.”

His father’s lips curled up in what might have been a smile, but instead, they formed into the same pinched expression he used whenever Mom did something unwittingly funny. Dad didn’t dare laugh at Mom. Jason’s face warmed when he realized what his father’s hidden amusement implied. How dare Dad think something like that about Steph—

His father must have sensed the impending explosion because he reached into a drawer and tossed a sealed package across the desk. Jason’s eyes focused on the box ... of condoms. Oh, he’d seen them in stores, and health class covered their use. Like every other boy in the class, he snickered when the coach rolled one over a banana.

Dad pointed at the box. “Those are for you. Not because I think anything negative about Stephanie. No, they are for you because I know how clever you are. Even if you don’t want to have sex today, you will soon enough. When you do, no matter what, put one on.”

His face still warm, although now from embarrassment, Jason gulped and picked up the box. “Ah, thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now don’t think your mother and I are giving you the green light to run around spreading pollen. Those condoms are more of an insurance policy. We’d prefer you to wait until you’re older.”

“How much older?”

“The age of majority in Pennsylvania is eighteen.”

A sudden thought made Jason grin. “Did Grandpa buy these for you too?”

The question made his father laugh. “Yep, even the same brand.” Dad rubbed his chin, then shrugged. Leaning forward, he spoke in a hushed voice. “Let me tell you a story about your grandfather. Way before he found his first girlfriend, he bought his own condoms, via the old postal service. The best part is he purchased a ‘He-Man Condom Sampler’ and ended up with a huge box full of condoms. One hundred and forty-four in total. It scandalized your grandmother.”

“I don’t know, sweetie. Going to a party seems risky.” Mom blew on her steaming cup of tea.

Since meeting Jason and his outgoing mother, Stephanie realized how reclusive her mother was. “It’s only a few more people, Mom.”

“A few more boys, you mean, and boys are just men with even less self-control.”

“It’s a birthday party, not an orgy.” As soon as the words left Stephanie’s mouth, regret set in. Mom had valid reasons for her beliefs.

But Mom laughed and waved at Stephanie’s outfit. “Even though you’re dressed for one?”

A week earlier, Mrs. Thomas took Stephanie aside. She’d once dated a musician with music tastes like Jason’s, and she’d kept a favorite outfit from those days. Perhaps Stephanie might try it on?

The outfit, a leather miniskirt and cotton T-shirt, fit quite well. Mom snickered when she found Stephanie trying it on, then returned with a pair of fishnet stockings. “If you’re going to dress like a trollop, you’ll need these.”

“So,” Mom continued their conversation. “How many boys will be there?”

“Just two of Jason’s friends.”

“Three boys, then? And you dressed like a party girl? It won’t be good if Jason starts showing you off. It made me extremely uncomfortable when Pavlo did it to me.”

“But Jason isn’t showing me off.”

All Mom had to do was raise an eyebrow.

“Well, maybe a little.”

Mom’s expression didn’t change.

“Well, so what if he wants to show me off? He says I’m the prettiest girl in the world. His friends aren’t going to do anything.”

“Let’s hope not. How’s your bond coming along?”

Her bond to Jason was the entire reason for their relationship. Although, instead of Mom’s original idea, she’d developed a human-like affection for him.

Mom didn’t believe it, but she didn’t believe pair bonding was real. Convincing her otherwise wouldn’t be easy. “I don’t know. It’s difficult to describe. I miss him when he’s not around, and I’m crazy happy when we’re together.”

With one eyebrow raised, Mom pressed for more. “And what else?”

She knew exactly what Mom meant. “All right!” Stephanie lifted her hands in mock surrender. “Sure, there’s some, like when we’re kissing, but it’s not just about sex. I like him for him, not just for his genitals.”

“Harrumph,” Mom tossed back her tea. “What you describe sounds like a Hollywood romance movie. As for me, I only care about Gene’s genitals. He’s lucky I cannot remove them for my use.”

Before Mom changed the subject, Stephanie quipped. “We could call a taxidermist.”

It wasn’t hard to surprise her mother, but Stephanie set a record with her suggestion. Mom’s eyes went wide, then a corner of her mouth quirked up, and she chuckled like an over-the-top movie villain. With a flourish, Mom lifted an imaginary phone handset to her head. “Please, Mr. Taxidermist, mount this penis for me so I may mount it later.” Her grin matched the chuckle.

“It’s beyond icky, Mom, but would it work?”

“I don’t know, our addiction is complicated.” Mom pushed her seat back from the table. “I asked about your bond to Jason because it may cause a problem.”

Tilting her head, Stephanie said, “How?”

“Ah,” Mom said. “You forgot our loyalty gene. What if one of those other boys gets fresh.”

“They’re his friends, they aren’t going to...” Stephanie’s words trailed off. What if Mom was right? “What should I do?”

“Wear your sneakers. Kicking someone while wearing pumps is a bad idea.”

Mrs. Thomas met Stephanie at the back door. “Don’t you look cute! Turn around now. Let me see how everything fits.”

Tugging the skirt down, Stephanie obliged.

“Hmm,” Mrs. Thomas mused, “Oh, I love the black sneakers and fishnets, but my old shirt must have shrunk, I don’t remember it fitting so tight.”

Stephanie reached for the door. “Should I change?”

Laughing, Mrs. Thomas pulled Stephanie towards the counter. “Heavens, no, you’re fine.”

“As long as you’re sure,” Stephanie said and tugged her skirt down again.

“Nervous, dear?”

“A bit.”

“Of course, you are. No offense, but I wonder why your parents homeschooled you without any socialization. Look, Jason cares about you. You know that, don’t you?”

Stephanie’s stomach fluttered. No matter what Mom thought, her and Jason’s feelings were real.

Face hot, Stephanie nodded. “I care about him too.”

“I know you do. Both of you have smitten written all over. Jason’s a good boy and won’t allow anything bad to happen. But if you feel outnumbered, come and hang out with me.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Thomas.”

“Don’t worry, if the boys get too rowdy, I’ll send Robert down. He’ll glower them into submission.”

“Thank you, Mrs.—”

“Stephanie, if you want to thank me, just keep on being yourself. Now, before you jump into the mosh pit, there is one boy you’ll want to keep an eye on. His name is Corey, and he’s always been jealous of Jason. Has Jason mentioned his nickname? No, well, you’ll want to hear this...”

In honor of their reunion, each teen wore a T-shirt proclaiming their allegiance to thrash metal. Of all the music forms from the previous century, thrash metal never died out. True, it had far fewer fans than the current mumble-metal craze. Every few years, promoters organized another “Clash of the Titans” tour. Holographic representations of Slayer and Megadeath headlined the show. Cover bands for Testament, Anthrax, and other legends of thrash filled out the lineup. Inveterate thrash purists kept Metallica out of the lineups.

Seth wore his most prized possession, a battered 1993 vintage Megadeath, Countdown to Extinction T-shirt. Corey wore a brand-new T-shirt with the coiled snake from Metallica’s Black album. True to his metal soul, Jason wore his most precious Slayer T-shirt.

The three boys had only been alone for a few minutes before Corey badgered Jason. “What’s this bull Seth’s spewing about you having a girlfriend?”

Jason glanced at Seth, who shook his head slightly. They both knew how Corey behaved.

Seth said, “Give the man a break, Corey. It’s his birthday.”

“Break, hell. I say if Nerd Boy has a girlfriend, she’s either ugly, a heifer, or both. Sorry, Nerd Boy, but happy birthday anyway.”

“Ah, thanks? You guys want some lemonade? Mom made it this morning.”

“Sure, said Seth, “Your mom makes the best.”

Corey cringed. “Lemonade? Jeez, guys, can this party suck any harder? Nerd Boy, where’s your dad stash the booze?”

“It’s upstairs in the kitchen cabinet closest to the dining room. Help yourself, but don’t get caught. Dad will flip out.”

Seth walked over to the wall terminal. “Guys, I made a cool playlist. It starts with White Zombie.” He thumbed a chip into the slot.

Did testosterone have a scent? Stephanie’s nostrils twitched as she walked down the steps. One hand on the handrail, the other held a tray of chips and drinks. That undefined scent mingled with the perspiration from active young men. The combination tickled her nose and sent waves of tingles to places she’d rather they not go.

The music, a semi-sensual groove of drums and guitars, made her want to dance. Although the lyrics didn’t make sense. What the heck was an Astro-Creep?

Jason whirled into view, his arms windmilling. He noticed her and tried to stop, but momentum pushed him against a taller, thinner boy. The thin boy gawked at her before catching a third boy’s forearm against his temple. Like dominos, Jason, thin-boy, and the forearm swinger, tumbled together into a sweating, writhing heap. The stereo speakers boomed a repeated chorus, “More human than human.” Stephanie didn’t know if she should dance, laugh, or administer first aid. Fortunately, the always alert Alfred muted the song to a reasonable level.

After setting the tray down, she turned to the pileup. Mindful of her skirt, Stephanie bent and pulled Jason to his feet.

“Thanks, babe,” he said and pulled her against him.

Babe? That’s new—his lips pressed against hers, and all those tingles struck home.

Some undetermined time later, the stereo switched to another metal track, the bass drum a steady, thump, thump, thump. A singer, different from the last, crooned about a boy and a girl who were “made for loving” each other.

She and Jason swayed together, not quite dancing, but something more primal. His arms crushed her against him, and his jeans, the ones she liked so much, chafed her thighs. Someone coughed, and Stephanie blinked her eyes open. Jason’s warm brown eyes looked back, holding promises for later. Across the room, forearm-swinger and thin-boy snickered.

Smiling, Jason waited while Stephanie unwrapped her right leg from behind his left. Knowing Jason’s friends had watched the whole thing made her really uncomfortable. Thanks, Mom, for the timely yet obscure warning.