Chapter 12: Harsh Realizations Turn Gold

[Very much alone and vulnerable, confused, frightened, utter chaos]

Milking was over. I now had terrible doubts, totally forsaken.

The son had left. I was to go to breakfast and I hoped to somehow get some clothes, plan my getaway, run away regardless but there was little relief from new fear. Did I really think they were going to give me my clothes back? I had been on the verge of liking being “Naked Guy”, even “livestock” accordingly, but now this. I was so betrayed.

No wonder they taught us all the religious stuff about evil. It was because of the kind of evil these dairy people were. And even with my life’s lessons on how to avoid ill handling by others I got suckered. I was really mad at myself for being led so far down the path of lame brains by letting someone feel my penis, push things into my rectum, be fucked by men using my anus. I was a penis sucker. well, something like that and the strangest aspect was the fact the family was the same religion as my father.

Hopefully the only hurdle left in this game was walking to the house in the nude. Somehow I was going to try to get access to a phone. Lilly must have been the one who hid all my bunk house belongings and she obviously wasn’t going to let me have anything. I wasn’t going to ask her. It was also obvious she had dangerous plans for me. If I got my clothes I was going to be coy and head out of this nut house maybe after dark.

But my sense of intuition scolded at me because after what had just happened I bet myself they never intended for me to leave, ever. They were going to use me as some kind of sex slave and worse yet, dumb livestock animal forced to fuck farm animals. And I didn’t even for sure know how to fuck but I was beginning to put two and two together, a penis stuck into something like the guys stuck theirs in my butt.

What would happen to me forced to be naked all the time with a very obvious and perpetual stiff oversized penis? But that almost seemed like the least of my worries now with the son planning to use me for something sub-human. I’d thought and thought about my dilemma while we finished with milking and it only served to make me more frightened and depressed plus I was really angry. My penis wouldn’t stop dribbling stuff and the shock of what had happened to me was numbing, totally. I didn’t know what to think except I’d been betrayed, forsaken, flash backs to my youth re igniting hatred. Shit! What a mess, a giant drooling penis I did not wish for in the beginning!

Yet for some strange reason I found I didn’t care about my nudity much anymore, really. I guess I felt like a cow, but cows probably had more self esteem than I. And almost everybody on the dairy was now used to seeing me with nothing on in the most compromising of acts having strange things done to me again and again even in front of strangers.

There were no private places for me to hide and nobody asked permission to use me. Even though I was angry at Lilly for letting me down, in fact threatening and really hurting me, I was somehow pondering a life without clothes. Maybe it was the closest thing to self esteem I’d ever been allowed after having so many people caressing and poking my naked body.

What strangeness was possessing me? How could my naked condition give me some pride I’d never owned before for any reason?

I could run away naked. I would. It didn’t matter. I just needed to run. It was a possible life and death matter. I’d deal with being naked later, when required. Surely I could find a cop or somebody to help me.

For some very strange reason I was overcome with a great desire to learn what fucking was and how to do it. Something told me it was my salvation. My penis was agreeing. I could tell by the way it felt. I was learning I could talk to it and get a response. But how would I find out how to fuck without Lilly? I didn’t want to ask a stranger. But then, maybe I could. Or I could let Lilly fuck me once and then make a better decision. I certainly didn’t want to try doing one of the guys in the butt, no way.

Shaken by this sudden flurry of emotions I was oddly dismissing clothes while I feared my future. But that was nuts. Some force was working on my attitude and it felt actually better not to feel the stress of exposure anxiety. So what if I was naked? Even after being rudely attacked by Lilly I was still liking it. I studied my nude body all exposed, free to be looked at. It actually really felt freeing. I was always naked under my clothes and I liked the attention I got when my penis was huge making goo. Maybe I wasn’t even worth the cost of maintaining clothes. Other livestock weren’t dressed up.

I questioned where this new rare logic was coming from but it also felt so real, so sensible. It was impressing me with the fact maybe I felt myself somehow a little superior because I wasn’t worried about them anymore. People had such a hang up about clothing. That was a fact.

Why would anybody care about clothes when it was so much easier to go without. The whole hang-up with clothing was frankly silly, took up too much time and cost money. The indigenous people weren’t worried about them and I had some kind of enormous penis that wouldn’t fit pants. Maybe I didn’t want to cover that thing up. Egos liked big ones and I sensed wearing clothes was like breaking some ancient tradition plus people tended to wonder what a person looked like naked especially if they were fit. So why not take away the wondering and let them see all, always. It was all natural, even my anus.

That glow was the strangest feeling I somehow kept wanting to share with my old friends back at school. I found I wanted to go back to school and show all students my erection and surely I’d have to be naked to do that. I pondered what would happen if I tried to be a nudist forever. I was getting a bit excited thinking about it.

Finished, we all left together to head across the road into the trail. I said nothing and kept to myself. I wanted no part of this group anymore but Lilly pulled me back behind and felt me up pretty good. “I want to get my gropes in before we go in the house.” I wrenched away from her, felt totally violated to even be touched by her. The nerve! “You have a lot of guts acting like nothing has happened!”

She poked me in the side. I didn’t respond to her at all. I was rage mad, scared crazy, furious. Her mind reading had to have been able to realize that. I turned away and walked on in another direction. After going to roads edge I stopped and without looking at her said, “I hate to admit this but being naked is different now. If I’m just livestock, like a cow, what difference would it make if I was naked or not? Am I just a dumb animal to all of you!?”

I walked on quickly to the edge of the pavement not knowing where I was going. I stopped again. “I suppose that I’ll be slaughtered for meat next. How do like me cooked? What cuts? Barbecued? I would have considered that murder but to you people I’m just a farm animal!” I had tears in my eyes and was mad furious. I screamed in embarrassment, shook as I hung my head, waving my arms and cried angrily. “I’m surprised you don’t already have your arm shoved in my ass clear to your elbow!”

The guys stopped in their tracks and just stared somewhat in awe at my state of mind. I screamed obscenities and shook all over. I looked right at them. “You FUCKERS! You, you FUCKING FUCKER FUCKS! All of you fucks!! YOU SUCK!! DIE AND GO TO HELL!”

“I HATE YOU!!”

There was a long moment, no sound. “Oh, STOP IT!” said Lilly. “Don’t pay any attention to the son. He’s a meat-head. Don’t tell me you took him seriously.” “What!? YOU HURT ME!” I yelled back. “I willingly let you stick your hand in my rectum. I trusted you as a real friend! Then just like that you turned on me totally and beat me up.”

Lilly approached quickly, hurrying. I listened to her foot steps catching up. There was no hesitation. She sounded worried. “Listen to me!” She turned in front of me with an expression that was very earnest. Even her pixie face couldn’t belie her intent. “LISTEN TO ME. I HAVE TO MAKE PRETEND WITH HIM.”

She put her hands on my chest and I felt new kind of energy coming from her. “Please. You MUST understand this.” She dropped her hands, clutched my waist and held me in my path. “He’s too dull brained to be able to figure out just how much fun we are having. HONEST! He thinks of nothing but profits and how much work he can get out of you. He isn’t paying you anything for working here, a pittance. He is willingly degrading you to an animal to salve his conscience and enable himself to use you for more profits because you are so special. HE KNOWS THAT. He absolutely hates the fact you are my special boy friend. I’m being intimate with you like he was never able to. He wanted that so bad but we just beat him up and his penis is NOTHING special just as he is NOTHING special.”

My expression remained nonplussed and I wouldn’t look her in the eyes. I didn’t believe her anymore. How could she have turned so abusive so suddenly if she really loved me.

“Just remember that you are worth far more to him than he is to you. YOU HEAR ME? We’re going to play along with him and he is very easy to outsmart. Trust me! We’re going to have a lot of fun fooling him. You can learn to get used to my manipulations with you. The manipulations and the great ejaculations, it certainly WON’T H-U-R-T YOU. I won’t allow you to be REALLY harmed! Please. I know it was abusive but you are not harmed. Do you understand? Please?”

“I’m going home. I don’t care about the games you want to play. YOU DID HURT ME. My poor anus! Everybody is using my anus to have their “fun” with. I’m getting the hell out of here!”

I started walking down the road fast, still not even knowing for sure where I was going, which it turns out was the wrong direction. I was in an angry brain cramp. Lilly rushed forward again. And again she stopped me by pushing back on me. Her touch was so compelling, regardless. I just stood and kept my eyes closed, tears now running down my cheeks.

“That demonstration, although needed, came by surprise. I had to do that without explaining to you ahead of time. That was VERY unfortunate. I’m sorry! It’s MY fault. I was so focused on washing you, loving doing it, loving you. I didn’t sense his coming ahead of time. That was a serious error on my part. But it’s no deal breaker for you and I. We’re solid! I WILL PROVE IT TO YOU.”

She looked into my reopened eyes, a look as loving as I’d ever seen after giving me a long warm kiss. “And once you get into the swing of things you’re going to love messing with the son as much as I do.

You could have merely come here to do grunt work all summer long but instead you are to become an amazing lover and do great things with your penis. In reality you don’t have any choice in that. Without asking too many questions, just for now, please try to accept it. You’ll know what you need to know soon, SOON! That’s a promise. It’ such a long story, needs so much explanation. I’m asking you to be very patient. Please.

Yes, it takes patience. I’m sorry, but it just does. Things can’t be rushed too much. It is SO very important. We only have one chance to get this right. Please!”

“But why did he give me all that spiel about you in the truck the other morning? He said I couldn’t ‘fuck you’, his words. He didn’t explain more other than the fact you never let him fuck you, ever, and that you used to beat him up.” “Yeah. Well, get it? He’s a dope. But he’s the owner’s son and he’s managing this place so we have to use our imaginations and screw with him over without being discovered. We keep his dairy herd in absolute top condition, totally, and he KNOWS it. We, all of us, are far more important to him than the other way around. He has to provide for us or else. Seriously! But we also have to convince him things are normal, that he’s in charge. We need the dairy to function normally for a given time. We need to make him think you are going to bring him great wealth with your penis. I know it sounds weird but soon you won’t think so.”

“I’m going to have a very hard time getting used to acting like a dumb animal for his sake and also to your rude mean fingers.”

I stopped and thought, needed a lot more time to ponder but finally concluded. I sighed and just stood there looking at her with determination and love. I somehow felt the importance she seemed to be trying to impress me with. I sensed it was real but I was so shocked.

“I hated what you did to me in the parlor. I really hated it when the son arrived! Before, it was so awesome. I don’t know you that well yet. You took me just hours out of high school, made me fall in love with you, stuck you whole hand up my anus inside me in unbelievable ways, and now this.”

Then, she and I just stared at each other and I began to feel her vulnerability. I almost sensed fear coming from her and I felt my heart going to her cause. I guess, yes, I truly loved her.

Lilly seemed to deflate from her self confident air right before my eyes. I couldn’t forget, although she was by nature overtly erotic, she still invoked a real sense of love to me and I couldn’t help but believe that love. She just stared. I cried a lot. “Oh ... Lilly. I feel hopeless.”

She simply hugged me and kept holding me. “If you promise to be careful with me then I guess maybe, m-a-y-b-e it’s okay. On geez. I never had anything even remotely like this happen to me in high school. I never ever would have dreamt of being in this situation before coming here. The mental image of somebody doing what you do to me has always been considered the stuff of horror and now I’m, all of a sudden, being required to do it a lot AND in front of all these people with the promise of having to do it for maybe crowds watching? It’s amazing you can consider it anything but entirely weird! I wouldn’t have wanted this to happen even in a doctor’s office, really.”

[This was really never easy to get used to, ever, although the results were good]

I spoke with emotion of course, halting, about the treatments she used in me with her arm up inside and I hoped she sensed my fears. Her acts on me, the concept, was just really hard to understand as a very rational act. “But rough treatment worries me. If you could just somehow let me know how it will be -- AHEAD OF TIME LILLY.”

She reached up and pulled on my neck. I resisted at first but she was insistent and she again nuzzled my neck, kissed my ear, breathing so seductively on me. I got an erection. The thing still worked and she immediately attached herself to it.

“Soon, very soon, you will know everything you need to know and will have total confidence in what we do. It won’t be long now. Let us get our work done, the manipulations, the passion, so we will all have unfettered reign over this dairy and the owners.

You will be lord of your domain soon enough and I’m sure is far more than you ever expected given a simple summer job. Again, listen to me. This is very, very important. I know I’m asking an awful lot of you, an awful lot to have to understand, but believe me, you will soon realize just how incredibly important this is and it is a fact you are the one, the one who is important. Trust me. This is true. You can forget about your past, about what they taught you, what they made you believe. You are free of the old slavery to clothes and you have the ability to amaze everyone with your penis. You are one of a kind on Earth. You have magic ability you don’t yet realize.”

She’d stopped me in my tracks, my penis held in both her hands and once more those hands were so very soft and warm. “You are top-important to us. So, you are also totally important to him even if he doesn’t quite understand just how important.” She seemed to be demonstrating her words by emphasizing-squeezing me, each firm squeeze kind of giving me a blood rush in my head. Felt behind my eye balls they bulged simultaneous to her emphasis. I guess it accented her meaning in an odd way, a kind of punctuation penis pulse plus.

Lilly’s softened approach was compelling and I wanted to believe her. She held on to me as she reached around my side and put her other hand in my butt crack to softly massage up and down. She pushed her body against the side of me I assumed to give me her warmth I loved. I would feel her breath on my face and it was so sweet. She mouthed her words against my ear.

“But he has to maintain his ego, so fragile, so we play along with him and his mind is really ours to control.” Fingers pushed into through my anus and deeper. “So, if you remain ready, accepting this like livestock, this is what we do with breeder sires. There should be no more surprises when I reach inside you. Remember, it’s important. Then we can get our work done sooner and all move on.”

Twisting softly her hand moved ahead with more lubrication. “We have him on a roll now. He’s believing it. This is good. Remember you have yet to feel me do to your body what you are destined for and it is so amazingly good, very soon. You will be the lord of all erections. Tom, you are going to fuck me, soon. I can’t wait. I have been waiting so long.”

I felt more of her hand roaming and my anus was a little raw from the rudeness in the parlor. “O-o-o-o-w.” “It will take a little time for you to completely understand your role here but you will be unharmed, I PROMISE. Now, stand still for a moment and let me help you with my healing techniques for your anus.”

[Just one example - one of so many, many occurrences with both hands busy]

Lilly’s hand was so warm, really humming. She twisted it slowly around to let her fingers lubricate their way to the back side of my erection where the energy she emitted took control of me. She massaged the tip of my penis very stimulating with the palm of her other hand. Her hands felt soothing, seemed to be healing me as she held them still, aside from the obvious vibration and continued to slowly push my penis tip opening side to side, slightly pressing in. I sensed something was descending down my erection, coursing, energy and warmth reaching, filling my balls. It was mind numbing great, feeling that forced me to moan. “It’s up to you how you handle this mentally.” “OOOooooh, yeah!”

I was falling under her spell again as I stretched, more so jerked tall with the wonderful stimulation. Suddenly I was almost on my tip toes changing my mind about her. “Please don’t stop, OOooooh that’s wondrous.” Energy was reversing, something coming back up my penis, too good feeling to be true, then reversing direction and doing that over and over again as my penis started ejaculating in little nervous very rapid spurts increasing length.

The guys, standing at roads edge, watching intently, began to mutter moan signaling a kind of approval of my erection’s performance. That was amazing in itself, they being both curious and seeing my penis ejaculate, squirting out, vocal with their condolences. I couldn’t imagine how they saw wonder in that but there it was. I again felt accepted, eased and seemed to make the ejaculations increase, puddling roadside, continuing feeling greater.

“These fingers are the keys to our kingdom, sir, and we need to own it together. My hand will unlock the future. The sooner you comply in spirit and push out to pucker, be my special fucker, solidify your new role as livestock the sooner we can succeed.” She began to push in deeper, all the way with a twist-pull out and back in, slowly, soothing. It felt strangely different than ever before and I liked it. “You don’t yet understand just how lucky you are. You can’t imagine how long this has all been in the making. You are a star in our realm and you will realize that soon.”

Lilly’s gestures, explaining, using my erection for emphasis felt wonderful, totally over the top as she squeezed on the under base at my testicles and stimulated me so, making my mind spin in passion, even more ejaculating. My balls were so very warm with energy and I fought through that distraction to fully understand just what she’d said. She pushed, massaged my erection back up against my stomach by pressing on the most sensitive spots as gizem goo cascaded down my stomach like frosting my cake.

I realized I was standing in a puddle of my own juices at the road edge across from the trail to the house with the morning sun shining brightly on us. All four of the guys were standing just adjacent to us staring at me, non descript but smiling wide as I was being encapsulated by Lilly’s hands in motion. It was okay. I didn’t care about an audience at that point because I was getting used to being manipulated in my nudity. I was enthralled and her abuses of me were already fading memories. She was being completely honest now.

I was consumed with her busy hands as she rearranged herself at my side enabling her reach to better position them. She kept twisting them very gently. It was soothing. She kept up that push pull vibrating smooth approach to invading me. My head tilted back; I let out a long low moan, “EEeeeuuuuwoooooooh,” that came from the deep as we stood out on the highway. She had entire control of my mid section. I was eyes closed facing the sun and slumped back over her work. What an odd display it must have been for any passer by. I didn’t care. Fuck them if they didn’t like it. I was in, completely. Curse the old school religious determents, it was I, determined to be free, naked and ejaculating for fun.

“O-O-O-oooh ... O-O-O-oooh ... OH OK-OK, but you may have to explain again later after I get over how great you feel. See, this is how it should be all the time.” She laughed quite hard and tugged some more on my penis while giving me a very wet tongue kiss. “MMMMM-mmmm ... oooooh.” I was relaxing entirely in this and she pressed against me to help hold me up. I was melting for her and all my angst would taper to vapor by command of her will.

Whatever, however, the new soothing action of her fingers and penis stroking, ball massaging mastery, won my approval. I was just completely perplexed with all this development, me, officially a breeder livestock. “How did I ever get mixed up in this? How did I become a dairy animal? What’s going to happen to me? I don’t want to become beef headed for the slaughter house?” I was so scared about that even while being driven to ecstasy.

“No, no, NO-O-O-O-O!,” insisted my thoughts reading Lilly. “That’s not remotely the thing at all. Don’t worry, you’re human and nobody is going to kill and eat you. T-R-U-S-T me. We are all here for a very important reason you’ll find out about soon enough. The dairy is just one site out of many and the purpose, our purpose, is far more important than anything.

The son is just here by birth. His role could be taken by anybody. He just happens to be a greedy bone head and that is going to work out great for us. You just play along and act like you did just now in the parlor and he’ll be happy. If he wants to see you perform you will.

No sweat,” Lilly chuckled as if imagining. “You’ll find out what fucking is all about and then you can fuck for everybody’s entertainment, a great start, and who gets the best part of that? YOU! Would you rather fuck or just watch somebody else do it. You aren’t lame. They are. Fucking is JOY. You’ll see. And if there is absolute safety in it then what’s to lose? You are to be the safe fuck, unable to cause pregnancy, forever free of any diseases, unable to catch any or pass them and you’re going to love this all summer long.

You can’t yet imagine, but soon you’ll know all and it makes ALL the difference. And really, don’t you like this penis of yours? It’s marvelous. I’m so proud of it. It was a little tricky making it and it turned out better than expected.”

“I don’t even know how to fuck yet but I hope we can do what we’ve been doing thus far, again, a lot, but without the abuse. Lilly, when you are gentle it feels so amazingly wonderful. It’s so good I can’t even think while it’s happening.”

“I just love how you can make that thing get so hard immediately,” she said. “It’s doing it on its own,” I said. “But I sure don’t mind it.” I tickled her back and felt her bottom running my finger along the seam of her pants. “MMMM~~m~m~m~mm~mm,” she moaned. “YOU and I have GOT to make full use of this penis REAL SOON. I’m going to teach the virgin in you to make love to a woman like no other.” I almost melted on the spot in those words as they conjured up naive visions in my head. I was finally beginning to trust Lilly again and I sure hoped I was making the right decision.

I hugged Lilly and lifted her off the ground as I spun around. “Yup. You’re ready,” she said.

Now I was in Lilly’s control again so soon after the abusive treatment in the parlor. I couldn’t help but love her. As I let her work on me I had my arms raised and hands folded behind my head stretching with the passion of ejaculation as a truck pulled up slowing to a stop. It had come down the highway to be greeted by the guys watching Lilly using her anus fingers in me. She pulled my penis longer. What a sight to see. I was in the throws of orgasm, almost, I’m sure, as the window rolled down and the passenger asked if everything was okay. “Oh sure,” said Lilly. “We’re just moving livestock over to the trail. This one is a real breeder stallion full of spirit but I got him in hand. He’s easier to control than you might think.”

It was more like “I got him in two hands...” as they noted what Lilly was doing with my penis. “I know how to control him as you can see. This is a neat trick.” I found I didn’t care at the moment if I was naked being anus probed and masturbated right in front of two people I didn’t know. “Okay, if you don’t need any help with this one... , “ said the passenger, probably a local farmer. “I got this,” said Lilly as she kept up the passion by stroking ever more rapidly. How weird they accepted what she was doing to me as normality of any kind. The guy inside the rig just stared for a bit as my penis got longer and when it finally ejaculated a big spurt on his fender they drove off quickly as I groaned. I wondered what they’d say if I told them I’d just graduated from a holy parochial high school in the big city up north. “Moooo!?”

But it sure was obvious I was involved in something extraordinary with an extraordinary person, Lilly, and amazing what I was involved in was bound to be accepted by everyone. Who would have ever thought so before now. And the strangest part of all was the why of it. So she let go of my penis and pushed me off toward the road crossing after saying, “Hold still”. She kissed my butt again and slowly pushed her hand in from behind, guiding the way with care, explaining with a silly lilt in her voice. “Let me guide the way by surrounding you. “Wow,” I said. “What a boner!”

My mid section felt really packed with her influences but not paralyzed as before and as promised it didn’t hurt. I almost felt lighter on my feet like she was lifting my load. “I’ll take care of you,” Lilly said as she began to push me forward, her hand sinking in way further, knuckles and beyond, wrist and all. I had no way of knowing how much of her arm was involved but it didn’t matter if it didn’t hurt, actually felt incredibly arousing and I was totally her butt puppet pointing the way.

On we went down the trail, Lilly-link poked inside me, my erection changing positions, pointing in various directions and feeling so strange and yet incredibly aroused shooting this way and that in pleasant spurts. The boys started laughing, dodging the flying goo and singing a made up song about Tom, Lilly’s magic pushing down the trail to the kitchen with a penis pointing the way. “Over the highway and through the woods his gizem points the way ... Lilly’s magic is up his butt, a place that it should stay ... Going to breakfast for lots of good food, We all want Lilly to fuck this new dude...” So on and so forth, squirt.