It was the Friday of my first week at a new company when Nicki the office manager walked up to my desk.

She was slender waisted, wearing jeans over a shapely rear end and a cream blouse with the cuffs turned up to reveal pale wrists and long, careful fingers. Her eyes were dark and oriental, peeping beneath a feathered fringe of shiny dark hair. The rest of her hair framed her oval face perfectly, splitting over her shoulders so that a few loose curls led the eye down to her breasts.

“Hi Tim. Some of us usually meet up after work for a drink on a Friday,” she said, looking down at me. “We normally go to the pub over the road since it’s nice and convenient. However because it’s your first week with us we thought we could make it more of a celebration and hit one of the bars in town. What do you think?”

“Sounds great,” I replied. “Give me a few minutes to finish up and then I’ll be ready.”

“Awesome,” she responded. “See you downstairs in the lobby in ten.”

She turned quickly, giving me a good look at that fabulous backside as she returned to her desk. All week I’d been stealing glances at her, imagining myself pressed up against her nakedness. My first day at the company had been spent almost exclusively with her as she sorted out my security pass, computer and various forms that I needed to fill in as part of my induction. She handled everything with a glowing smile and perfect efficiency, in full command of every part of the day. She’d won my heart immediately and I already knew I was devoted to her. But I was resigned to my love being unrequited. I was a good ten years older than her, overweight with unremarkable looks and worst of all suffered from a crippling shyness that made me blush and stutter in front of women. She, by contrast, was almost a goddess in her grace, charm and confidence.

I quickly saved my work on the computer and shut it down for the night. Nicki was already heading to the exit with a group of men and women co-workers. I didn’t know them all but spotted a couple of familiar faces: Sarah and James who were a married couple that happened to work in the same company but different departments. I trotted over to James and followed him out of the door.

“Hi Tim,” he said genially, “how did you find your first week?”

“Oh it was great!” I replied, “I think I just about know what I’m doing now!”

He grinned. “Ha, this time next week it will all have changed again! That’s how it is at this place sometimes.”

I smiled back. “So where are we headed tonight?”

“The Sunflower Lounge. It opened a few months ago in the town centre. It’s pretty dead most nights but on Fridays there’s live music and happy hour which starts in about 20 minutes. Better get a move on so we make the most of it.”

There were about fifteen of us in total and we chatted in small groups as we walked into the centre of town. Everyone knew one another and were keen to learn more about me so I was peppered with questions like I’d entered a quiz show. They soon established that I lived alone after having been married and divorced. No kids, which I regretted, and no pets either, which I didn’t. I was new to the area and didn’t know my way around yet, so I ended up with dozens of recommendations of restaurants, pubs and events in the area.

Our destination was a large bar tucked away in a cheap looking side street. The exterior was decorated in garish yellow sunflowers but the interior looked inviting and emitted a warm glow with a hint of citrus and cinnamon in the air. We piled inside and started shifting tables around so we could sit as one group. The live band were setting up at the other end of the bar and soon began to play some indie pop covers with more enthusiasm than talent. But with happy hour starting too, it didn’t matter how good they were, we were soon singing along to the popular songs and getting happily drunk together.

After about an hour I noticed Nicki get up and greet a new arrival with a strong kiss. He appeared to also be in his thirties with fly away blond hair, round glasses and a serious face. He wore a dark blue denim shirt, unbuttoned almost to his navel, stone washed jeans and high end trainers, almost sparkling from their newness. He was about the same height as me but broader across the shoulders and heavier in the chest. He held her as they kissed and I could see his strong hands tight on her buttocks as he drew her to him.

Although I’d known all along that Nicki must have been in a relationship it still hurt to see my fantasies dashed on the rocks so vividly. Why did he have to look so intelligent and handsome? They looked perfect together. My only hope was that he was a complete dick that no-one liked. Unfortunately, from the friendly fist bumps and greetings he was getting it seemed that he was fantastically popular with Nicki’s friends.

I dug my nails into my palm and told myself to stop being so selfish. She was obviously happy and making her happy was something that I should take pleasure in.

The evening carried on with more alcohol and music. Gradually people started leaving until finally it was just me, Sarah, James, Nicki and her boyfriend whose name I had learned was Ben.

“What are you drinking Tim?” Ben asked. “It’s my round.”

I looked up, through bleary eyes. The room was in that indeterminate stage of almost but not quite toppling over. Any more alcohol and it would be fully spinning.

“I shouldn’t ... I’m not sure I should have any more...” I stuttered.

“One more? Go on, I’m buying”

I hesitated. “OK, then, just the one. Old Fashioned please.”

“A what?” he replied, laughing. “What’s that then?”

“Whisky cocktail...” I managed.

“Like in Mad Men.” said Nicki suddenly. Up until now she had seemed unaffected by the wine she’d consumed but her voice became strangely slurred when she spoke. Everyone laughed and started imitating her drawl. “Stop it”, she giggled. “More wine and then I have question for you all.”

Ben returned with the round of drinks and we all gathered closer to Nicki as she took a sip from her glass. She looked at each of us in turn and I could see that she was having some trouble focussing properly.

“Now,” she said. “I want to know your greatest achievement. What’s the single thing that you feel proudest of?”

We all looked at one another, surprised at such an earnest question.

“I’ll go first,” said Sarah. She paused for a minute then gave her answer: “I’m proudest of becoming the first female head of finance in this company’s history”

“Wow Sarah, that’s serious!” said James, laughing. “I was just going to say my greatest achievement was sleeping with Claire Williams and her sister Emma on the same weekend away!”

Everyone, except Sarah laughed loudly. Finally Sarah grinned and said “Yeah, but are you proud of what they called you when they found out?”.

James put on a mock serious face, “No. That was very upsetting and spoiled my love life for several months.”

I knew what I was proudest of but I wondered whether I should say something else instead. I hardly knew these people but James’ answer had emboldened me and lightened the mood. I took a gulp of the Old Fashioned and said “I once went down on a woman for 6 hours non stop.”

They all looked at me in astonishment. Sarah’s jaw dropped.

“What the fuck!” said James, a grin spreading across his face.

“Yeah, it would have been longer, but she said she needed time to recover.”

“Holy shit.” I heard Ben mutter.

I could feel their eyes on me as I looked down into my drink. I looked up to see Nicki staring quizzically at me.

“Plus her husband was on his way home...” I trailed off.

“You sly dog,” roared James and slapped me on the arm.

“Wow Tim, I’m impressed,” said Sarah, then to James: “See, some men know how to please their partners properly!”

“Tim’s going to get us in trouble,” joked Ben to James who nodded vigorously in agreement.

“Sounds like you boys are going to have to up your game significantly,” said Nicki abruptly. “Somehow I don’t think anyone is going to top that tonight, so I think we ought to declare Tim the winner.”

“I think his girlfriend was the winner that night!” said James.

They laughed then raised their glasses to me. “Cheers!” they chorused.

“Cheers!” I replied and drained the last of my drink. My eyes met Nicki’s over the edge of my glass. She was inscrutable but she held my gaze for several seconds until the flush rising into my cheeks forced me to look away.

“Well,” I slurred, “I think I’d best be getting home. If I can find my way. Everything seems a bit fuzzy after that last drink.”

The room was beginning to slowly spin now.

We all stood, gathered up coats and bags and found our way to the exit. On the street outside Nicki stood holding Ben’s hand while he flicked through his phone. Sarah and James had their arms clamped around one another’s shoulders for support fearful that one or other of them might end up in the gutter. The night was warm and the moon was out, casting a pale light over the street.

“See you tomorrow Tim,” said Nicki. Her voice was low and beautiful and I wished she were going home with me instead of Ben.

“See you Nicki and thanks so much for making my first week so wonderful!” I replied.

“Bye Tim,” chorused Sarah and James at the same time, making each other laugh.

Sarah and Nicki hugged and James saluted goodbye; then they left, wobbling down the street.

“Ready?” asked Ben to Nicki. “I called an Uber so I can get you home all the quicker.” He ran his hand down her side and cupped her wonderful rear again.

“Night Tim,” said Nicki and turned away with Ben toward the main road.

“Night Nicki,” I replied quietly. I stood for a few minutes watching her, hoping she would glance back at me but she didn’t. Once their Uber arrived I began a slow walk home, wishing the pavement would stop turning beneath my feet.

I tried to keep myself busy over the weekend in an attempt to stop thinking about Nicki. I stripped the walls in the living room and shopped for wallpaper to hang. But it was impossible to get her perfect face out of my mind. Those eyes held me rapt and more than once I found myself staring blankly at the bare wall, brush in hand dripping paste onto the carpet.

On Monday, Nicki was already at her desk when I arrived and I swallowed my nerves to greet her warmly.

“Hi Nicki. Hope you had a nice weekend.”

“Yes thanks Tim. It was lovely. But we went skating yesterday so now I’m covered in bruises!”

“Oh no,” I replied, “I hope you soaked yourself in a nice hot bath after.” My mind was racing at the thought of tenderly soaping her injuries.

“I did actually, although I don’t think it helped much. I’m sitting on the biggest bruise of them all.” She grimaced with a twinkle in her eye.

“Sounds painful.”

“I thought I’d be ok with all the padding I have down that way,” she joked, watching me.

I was stuck for words. What could I say that was funny but didn’t sound like I’d been studying her rear end intimately for the past week?

“Well, make sure you keep moving. Come over and say hi if you need an excuse.”

Oh my god, what was I saying? None of it made sense.

“I’ll do that Tim,” she was saying, “Speak to you later.”

I went to my desk and spent the morning trying to concentrate on my work. Near lunchtime, Nicki came over and stood behind my chair while I finished up a change to the spreadsheet I was working on. I spun round to see her leaning gingerly against my desk, looking at me with her head tilted to one side.

“Feeling any better?” I asked.

She hesitated, looking briefly around the office to see if anyone else was listening. Then instead of answering she asked “Tim, that story you told us on Friday. Were you bullshitting us?”