Chapter 6

June 4, 2017 (Sunday)

Dear Ms. Diary,

This afternoon while Dad was out running errands, Mom came to my door and was about to knock but saw the door open and me reading on my bed in my usual lack of clothing there.

“Come in, Mom.”

“You weren’t kidding about being naked in your room.”

“Nope.”

“And your door is open; anyone could have seen you.”

“Really, Mom? Not only is there no one here but you and me, I know what Dad sounds like on his way up the stairs, and I could easily close the door before he got to it.”

“Or are you hoping that he’ll ‘catch’ you at it?”

I felt my cheeks heat, but came back with, “You wish. You just like to embarrass me.”

“Mistress, you had commanded me to fix breakfast in the nude and record any conversations touching on the clothing-optional policy.”

“Correct, Supplicant. Play it.”

Mom sat on my chair, put her phone on the desk, said, “This will take a while,” and started the recording.

[Sounds of food prep: refrigerator opening, pans clanging, etc. Humming, singing.]

“Hey, did you forget something, little lady?”

“Nope. The eggs and bacon are nearly ready; the biscuits are done and staying warm in the oven. Did you want OJ?

“I see where your daughter gets what you fondly call her ‘sense of humor.’”

[SMACK!]

“Ouch, you brute. Who told you that you could spank the chef? I don’t recall that being permitted in my employment contract.”

“Oh, it’s permitted. You obviously didn’t notice the fine print. This, also, is permitted.”

“Ooof. Barbarian! Putting that thing inside me is not permitted. It can’t be.”

“Oh, it is. If not in print, then in legal chef-molesting precedent.”

“That’s more than mere molestation, unkind Sir. That could get your bacon burned.”

“Oh, by all means, we can’t have that!”

[Whimper] “Where’d you go? I was just coming around to your side of the argument.”

“Oh, there’s more of that where that came from. Don’t you fret, you lovely-assed chef of mine.”

[SMACK!]

“Go sit, Boss-man, your breakfast is coming.”

“Ah, but will you be coming, too?”

“Sit!”

[Table sounds: cutlery on plates, liquid pouring, various chatter about ‘how many,’ ‘how much;’ food-enjoyment sounds]

“Do we know when Beth will be back?”

“I can’t imagine that it would be much before noon. Why? Did you have plans for this morning in this temporarily empty nest?”

“Of course. I thought I’d try to finish that book I started last year.”