Chapter 9: The Skullys

The email said that we would be greeting Douglas & Elane Skully, their son Kyle, his wife, Karleen, and their three children Kurt, 10, Kaycee, 5, and Kallie, 3.

They would be spending five days (four nights) on our island.

DAY 1

We had their flight information and as expected – it was in their written instructions – got a phone call as the family was leaving the airport in their rental van. We would great the family, show them the appliances, hot tub, and pool. And depart.

That’s not what happened.

Addressing Elaine and Karleen I said, “Ladies, the bedrooms are upstairs. Figure out where everyone is to sleep while we show Douglas and Kyle the appliances and pool. Gentlemen, you are with us.”

This part never takes very long. Fran demonstrated the hot tub controls. I pointed out a laminated sheet that explained not only the hot tub but had my cell number in case they had questions about anything.

Doug (that’s what he wanted us to call him) sent Kyle back to find the ladies. He then asked if we could be live-in housekeepers and babysitters. “The firm will pay you $1,000 a day for your service.” I was all ready to okay his offer when he continued, “That’s $1,000 a day for each of you. Five days, $10,000 in total.”

“We would be happy to do that for you and your family.” Damn, that firm sure treats their senior people well.

“Z, it would be easier for the firm to wire payments into your accounts. Do you and your sister have accounts we can use.”

“We share everything. I have that information at home. We will have to go back home and bring clothing and what all for our stay. I will bring my account information when we get back.”

“Take a cab. Take $300 in 20’s and come back as soon as you can. Keep the change.”

We asked the cab driver to wait. Ten minutes was all it took to put a few things in a small carryall. Fran asked the driver to take us to Starfish mall. Again, we asked him to wait. We knew what we wanted and where we could find it. Yes! They had what we wanted. We bought two lightweight terrycloth robes that we could wear with nothing underneath. In case you are wondering, these robes were very much G-rated.

When we got back, Doug, Elaine, and Kyle were talking over empty plates on the kitchen table. Karleen had her children outside eating ice cream and watermelon slices. I asked Elaine which bedroom was ours. “End of the hallway. Then she stood and asked quietly if we were put out by being asked to be household staff.”

“Surprised, but not bothered. Our schedule this week was quite open.”

“I am happy about that. Please assume you are always welcome to eat with us.”

We put our stuff in our assigned bedroom and returned. Kyle was doing something on his laptop. “Z”, he asked, “I found a pops concert at the Practice House. The audience will be invited to dance. What’s it like?”

“I’ve only been there once and I was assisting the caterer with a meal for about 20 couples. Concert ... there is a stage ... could hold maybe 20 musicians. Hardwood floor – 100 people could be dancing at the same time. How that would work with wine and food service I wouldn’t know.”

Elaine asked, “How should we dress for such an event?”

“I am the wrong person to ask about proper clothing. But I can ask someone who would know.”

That seemed to be the way to go. Fran and I walked outside and called Alice Brand.

“Z, this is a surprise. What’s up?”

“I have two couples from Chicago who are thinking of attending the pops concert at the Practice House tonight. I’ve been asked what they should wear.”

“If I remember, you would go nude if that were legal.”

“So true.”

“Men first. White shirt short sleeves or tropical print. Long pants. Shoes for dancing. Ladies, low heels or flats. Hemlines anywhere floor to below mid-thigh. Print or solid. No frou-frou. Be comfortable. If they brought 4-inch heals burn ‘em.”

“Hang on, let me tell them.” I repeated word for word except, “Alice suggested that 4-inch heels should be incinerated.” I added, “The only 4-inch heels on the island are worn by strippers.”

Elaine asked about nylons.

“Did you hear that Alice?”

I held the phone up and everybody heard her say, “Incinerate them along with 4-inch heels.”

“Thank you, Alice. You know my fashion sense. Bye.”

Doug asked if I knew a restaurant for the four adults in our party.

“I’ve eaten at the Barge ‘n Grill. Both times I had steak and it was delicious. Just don’t be put off by their exterior. Inside everything is quite comfortable.”

“How long to drive there?”

“Doug, I don’t drive. I generally take the bus or if I’m in a hurry, a taxi.”

“Kyle, please consult Google for driving times to the restaurant and the Practice House.”

Doug presented the plan.
4:30 depart for Barge ‘n Grill
6:30 latest we can be back here
7:15 depart for concert
10:30 expected time back here

At 16:15 Karleen asked me to order pizza for her children’s dinner. “Here is $40. Cheese and pepperoni for the children. Get whatever you want for yourselves. Make sure they drink their milk. While we are gone they would love to use the pool.”

“Karleen, we would love to use the pool with them. But we don’t have swimsuits. We could, however, play in the pool without suits if that’s okay with you.”

“The kids would love skinny dipping. Are you sure you’re okay being nude outside?”

“Honey”, I whispered conspiratorially, “We would enjoy being nude outside all the time if it were acceptable. Fran and I would be nude in the house if that were okay.”

“Better stay dressed. Although, Kyle might prefer you two nude. Let’s not encourage him.”

Their taxi arrived to take them to dinner. Karleen told her kids “When I am out Z and Fran are in charge. You three, have to do what they say. Okay?”

As one voice, “Yes, mommy.”

“Kaycee and Kallie, please show Fran your room. Kurt, you get to sleep on the sofa. We are going to have pizza for dinner. When your sisters get back I will let you tell them. Okay?” A minute later his sisters returned holding Fran’s hands. As planned, Fran was wearing her terrycloth robe. I whispered to Fran that Kurt was supposed to tell his sisters about pizza for dinner. I walked upstairs, stripped and returned wearing my robe.

I looked at Kurt. “Did you tell your sisters what I told you?”

“Pizza for dinner.” We had three happy children.

“Your mom said you could all use the pool. But Z and I did not bring swimsuits. She said that we could all play in the water without swimsuits.” Fran then removed her robe. “I am ready for the pool. Leave your clothes on the sofa and let’s get wet.”

“Remember, no peeing in the pool. Please use the toilet.”

Once outside, Kurt jumped into the pool with a splash. He swam to the far side of the pool returning as Kaycee walked into the pool using its steps. Fran jumped into the pool encouraging Kallie to jump into her arms. Kallie never jumped but Fran held out her arms and carried her into the water. Meanwhile, Kaycee was doing a credible dog paddle to the other shallow side of the pool. Little Kallie kept saying “swim” so Fran gently lowered her into the water and surprise, she dog paddled over to the steps and sat down.