Chapter 14: Pride. Fear. Guilt. Pick a Number

Monday December 26
While I enjoyed spending the night in Palm Springs, the drive back to Malibu in the morning was a nightmare. I think karma was trying to balance out the great day we had yesterday.

When I arrived home, Manaia and Lexi were waiting for me.

“Hana quit,” Lexi announced when I walked in the door.

“What? Why?” I asked.

“She took Jiro home for Christmas to meet her family. I guess Jiro and her dad had words. Long story short, they broke up, and Hana decided she would stay home so she wouldn’t have to be around him on set. She said it would be too painful.”

“I know this is exactly the wrong thing to ask right now, but where does that leave me as far as an interpreter goes?” I asked.

“If it helps, Hana said she was sorry she left you with no notice,” Lexi added.

“That doesn’t do me any good, though. I relied on her to read my lines phonetically, so I had the right inflection. I’m getting better, but I have to hear it to be able to do my job,” I explained.

“Why don’t you ask one of the other actors to help you until you can find someone else?” Brook suggested.

“That might be a short-term solution, but they need to learn their own lines.”

“I’ll ask Misaki. She’ll know who to ask,” Lexi assured me.

Welp, there was nothing more I could do about it right now.

“Okay, people, settle. We have a lot to cover in a short time,” Mr. Otsuki announced. “We need to get four days’ worth of scenes in the can in only two and a half to keep on schedule.”

No one complained because they’d all had Christmas off. Most of them had flown in this morning and looked a little the worse for wear. I knew from experience the flight to and from Japan was a bear. Once we had all taken our seats, our director continued.

“This week’s first is where Haru’s character learns what it is like to be popular now that she is dating the Big Man on Campus. She discovers it’s not exactly what she expected.”

I’d bet Brook could write a whole book on that topic. This was the beginning of the end for the David and Haru relationship. Haru’s character would find that what she really wanted was to be the simple, small-town girl she’d been when she arrived on campus. It would cause her to break up with my character. Of course, my character would discover he couldn’t live without her and would give up everything just to have her in his life.

That was the plot for almost every love story written. Girl spots a boy with a flaw. By flaw, I mean he’s a prince or bad boy or something that’s a deal-breaker. Her love causes him to come to his senses, and he changes. I think every girl secretly believes that she can change any boy, or that’s the fantasy, anyway.

Real life never seems to work out quite like that. Guys are pretty good at making girls think they have mended their ways for a short time. It usually ends when the guy discovers he wants to move on to his next conquest. Men can be good, and meet a girl’s standards, but typically only so long as they’re getting something out of it.

Personally, I thought the game-playing was why people like Gwen Larkin were unhappy and could never find the right person. Her rant about how the guys she had recently dated were each what she affectionately called a ‘man-child’ was spot on. It was what young men seemed to be like now. They just wanted to hook up and not date seriously.

At some point, I’d imagine you would quit the fantasy of changing a guy. You’d realize what you had was what you were going to get, no matter how much they love you. I think there was a metaphor about changing the spots on a tiger or something like that.

When we had our break for dinner, Lexi found me.

“Ari called. He wanted you to know that your movie came in third at the box office this weekend behind the Star Wars movie and The Passenger.”

“That’s good, right? I thought we would be behind La La Land for sure. What did they each earn?”

“Rogue One: A Star Wars Story only did $153 million,” she said and rolled her eyes. Everyone expected that. “The Passenger did $37 million, while your movie earned $23 million. Why Him? sold $11 million in tickets, and La La Land came in at $5.7 million. Ari sounded like he was doing a little jig, he was so happy.”

“I bet he’s been getting calls for me to look at other roles,” I said, making my guess as to why he was pleased.

“Probably,” Lexi agreed. “Halle also called. She said the song you two did, The Gift, was released on iTunes and is currently number 98 on the country charts. She said they want you two to go into the studio and redo it.”

It had been a hit when Martina McBride and Jim Brickman recorded it as a duet, but that had been a long time ago. It sounded like Halle had breathed new life into the song.

“If Halle wants me to, then I’ll do it,” I conceded. “Maybe they can auto-tune my voice.”

I could see Lexi bite her tongue to prevent a smart comment.

It was another brutal day on the set. We didn’t get out of there until almost four in the morning, with plans to resume filming at nine a.m. If I was lucky, I might get four and a half hours of sleep. What made it bearable was that Mr. Otsuki was very clear in what he wanted as far as performance went. The other huge help was that Mr. Nomura, my mentor, had stepped up and helped me learn my lines. He offered to do that for the rest of the filming, so I took him up on it.

As we were driving home, Lexi told me that Lily had called. She and her family were actually in LA and wanted to meet me for lunch tomorrow. I hoped there was good news about her mom.

Tuesday December 27
Brook was an angel because she had breakfast ready when I climbed out of the shower.

“You’re too young to be working these hours,” she informed me as she tentatively took a sip of coffee.

Usually, either my dad or mom made coffee in the morning. I think Brook must have used half a can to make this batch. It was almost strong enough to give Cuban coffee a run for its money.

“I’m sorry,” I said and gave her a kiss. “I know you wanted to spend time with me, but I have to go. Why don’t you join me for lunch with Lily and her family?”

“I think you need to do that alone,” she said.

From her look, it couldn’t be good news. I took a deep breath and shook my head. I could tell she didn’t know the full story, so I decided to just wait and let Lily tell it. Manaia grabbed my arm and started to drag me out. When I glanced at Lexi, she wouldn’t look me in the eye. I suspected she’d told Manaia to get my butt moving. I let them put me in the car and then turned to Lexi.

“Do you know what’s going on with Lily?” I asked.

“Pride. Fear. Guilt. Pick a number. From what little she told me, it wasn’t her mother’s fault for leaving. Before you ask, she didn’t give me any details. It sounds like she just needs you to listen to her and be her friend,” Lexi advised.

I nodded and remembered my prayer for times like this. ‘God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.’ I couldn’t worry about Lily right now; I had to focus on the task at hand, which was acting. So, I pushed my worry about Lily down into a box deep inside me and closed the lid for now. I would worry about it when I saw her at lunch.

I was told that lunch with Lily and her family would be at my house. Lexi had made the call that Lily would want to have some privacy and not share her family business in public. Brook had gone to the grocery store and bought ready-made dishes for lunch.

When we pulled up, I saw a rental car in the drive. I was just getting out of the SUV when the front door flew open, and Lily ran out. I soon found her wrapped around me, sobbing. Her dad and brother stuck their heads out the door, as did Brook. Thankfully, Brook took them in hand and led them back into the house. Lexi joined them, but Manaia remained in the car to do his security bit.

Being a typical guy, a crying girl was my kryptonite. I never really knew what to do when they did this, so I just held her. There was a sudden transition from crying to Lily barking out a laugh.

“Sorry, I promised myself I wouldn’t cry. I guess that went out the window.”

“Why don’t we go inside?” I suggested.

She pulled back from me and wiped her face, then just nodded as I put my hand in the small of her back and guided her inside. I heard everyone in the kitchen, so I steered her off to where there was an office so we would have privacy. It had a sitting area with two large comfy chairs I was sure were used when someone wanted to kick back and read a good book.

“So, you found your mom. I didn’t realize she was in California,” I said to help get the conversation started.

“Actually, we started our trip in Canada. We’ve been to Phoenix and now LA.”

“Why did she leave?” I asked.

That was the big question. We were talking about a mother who seemed to be happy in her marriage. She had two children, one just starting middle school, and the other either in or ready to go off to college, I couldn’t remember which. She went to work, and the last she was seen was leaving with a male coworker. Then nothing for five or six years.

Lily got a sad look on her face.

“She had brain tumors that affected her in unexpected ways.”

“Is she okay?” I asked, suddenly worried.

Lily shook her head.

“She’s changed. She lost her memory for a time, but she now remembers us. Mom told me that her life with us was more like a dream than anything else. She has a new life now.”

I had a hard time wrapping my brain around what Lily just said. If I lost my memory but figured out about my kids, I would move heaven and earth to be with them. It also sounded like the plot to a bad soap opera.

“Maybe I need to just shut up, and you tell me the whole story,” I decided.

“I’ve had a hard time believing it, too. More than anything, I wanted to simply blame my mom for leaving us. I was ready to tell her off, but first we had to talk to her doctor so he could explain what happened,” she shared.

“Oh,” was my well-thought-out input.

Lily smiled at me.

“My thought exactly. Dr. Lanus filled us in on her background before we were allowed to meet her. It was part of the conditions she set,” Lily said.

“There were conditions to see your own mom?” I asked incredulously.

“It made me want to be even more mad at her than I already was. I think my dad had had enough and suggested that we just forget about her and go home. I keep forgetting that he lost his wife the same time I had my mom taken from me. My brother was the one who saw reason and forced us to go.

“Dr. Lanus wasn’t able to fully explain what happened with my mom for the first few months she was missing. He suspects that the tumors caused retrograde amnesia since they were centered in the part of the brain that controls memory. He told us what probably happened was that the tumors finally got big enough to have a profound effect on her. He said in a small number of cases, it happens suddenly.

“The scary part was that because of her memory loss, she didn’t have the presence of mind to seek medical help. She was found in Ontario, Canada, with no idea of who she was. She was picked up by the police because she was acting crazy. When she was checked out, they discovered the tumors,” Lily explained.

“Why didn’t they put together that she was missing from back home?” I asked.

“They assumed she was from the area. It never crossed their minds that someone in her condition could just wander into their country. They didn’t have any missing persons that met her description in Canada.”

Sadly, that made sense.

“How did she end up in Phoenix?” I asked.

“When Mom was a teenager, her family lived there. Her memory started to come back, and she remembered her childhood. She went there to discover what had happened to her family. Once she found they had left, she thought she remembered them moving to LA,” Lily explained.

“Did they?” I asked.

“No. Dr. Lanus said that it wasn’t unusual for the brain to create false memories, either entirely made up or real memories misplaced in time. He’s been working with her to create as normal a life as she is capable of.

“He warned us that her personality might have changed. Boy, had it. Mom said she knew who we were, but I’m not sure she did. She didn’t want to be touched. Dr. Lanus thought that she may have been mistreated when she first left our home,” Lily said.

It took all of a millisecond for my mind to go in several directions with that piece of news, none of them good. My heart broke for Lily.

“I’m so sorry,” I mumbled.

She had fresh tears on her face, so I opened my arms, and she was instantly sitting in my lap, crying.

“David, she’s not really my mom anymore,” Lily gasped out.

“Oh, Honey. Yes, she is. She’s just sick.”

“Do you think she’ll ever be the same?” Lily asked.

How could I answer that? I had no idea.

“I really hope so.”

That seemed to be the right answer. I held Lily until she finally stopped crying. My guess was she’d been keeping a brave face on for her dad and brother. I was glad she felt she could come to me with something like this.

Brook finally came in.

“David needs to grab something to eat and get back to work,” she gently explained.

“Oh, sorry. I was wrapped up in my own issues. I forgot you were here to film your movie,” Lily said, getting off my lap.

We went into the kitchen where Lexi had made me a sandwich and grabbed me a can of Mountain Dew. I remembered her dad from around town. Her brother was older, and I only recognized him because he looked like his dad.

I was curious as to how this all started.

“How did Megan find her?” I asked.

“I was in the office and saw her doing research on something for Caryn. I asked her if, when she had some free time, she would be willing to do some research for me to find anything out about where my mom was. She found her on a missing-persons website in Canada,” Lily said.

“We went there, and they gave us the information about Phoenix. The people that live in our old house told us she had gone to LA,” her brother provided.

“Megan got on one of those online services that has everyone’s addresses and phone number, and they had the group home address listed for her. That’s where we met Dr. Lanus,” Lily explained. “He manages the facility.”

“Lily told us that you paid for our travel. I’ll make sure you get reimbursed,” her dad said.

“It was freely given; I didn’t offer Lily money to create a debt. I’m just happy that you were able to find her,” I said, and then had a thought. “Does your mom still live at the group home?”

“No. She’s able to live on her own and has a job now,” Lily said.

“If she would want to move closer to you all, I would be happy to help,” I offered.

“You’ve already done enough,” Lily’s brother said.

“I’m not sure she would even want to,” Lily admitted.

“That’s fine. I just want you to know that if she does, and needs some financial assistance to make it happen, I would be glad to help,” I assured them. “Again, with no strings attached.”

“I know you mean it, and that’s why you’re one of my favorite people. Thank you,” Lily said.

“We have to go,” Lexi said to remind me of work.

I was glad Lexi was there to keep me on track, and I told her so on the ride back. I also asked her to contact my mom and Caryn to let them know about Lily’s situation. When Lily got home, she would need the support of our small town. That was something we were good at. They would rally around and make sure Lily and her family were okay.

During the afternoon, I received pictures of Halle and Brook hitting the after-Christmas sales. This was one of those times I was glad that my girlfriend had her own money to spend. From the number of outfits I saw they’d tried on, it looked like they were on a quest to single-handedly revive the California economy.

I also received pictures from my brother of Mac and Kyle at their first pony riding lessons. They were just too cute for words. Mac was seated with her back board-stiff like she was on a show horse. Kyle just looked like the goofy kid he was. He kept trying to take off the helmet they made the kids wear for safety.

My mom had made it her mission to unload the kittens. From what I could tell, Brit wasn’t aware that Mom had dropped off kittens at a few of the Mennonite farms. My grandma had gotten one with the promise that my mom thought it would be a good mouser. Mom left me a note that the mean one was still in my apartment. She’d tried to catch it, but it had bested her. I was under orders to capture him once I got home and take him to my uncle’s farm. I wondered what Uncle John had done to make her mad.

Dad had posted a video of himself out in the snow, hitting golf balls with his new clubs. That made me reconsider playing football at someplace like Michigan. I might have to seriously rethink where I went because I enjoyed the LA weather this time of year.

Tsuyoshi Nomura and I were preparing me for my next scene.

“I bet when you agreed to be my mentor, you didn’t expect to be handholding me so I could learn my lines.”

“I look at it as paying it forward. When I first arrived in Japan, I had an older actor act as my mentor. I promised myself that someday I would pay him back for his help. Unfortunately, he passed a few years ago,” he said.

“I would think that the transition from China to Japan would be easy,” I ventured.

“In a sense, but every culture is different. And while the languages share some characters, since they’re not phonetic, they’re not even close to the same, speaking.”

“What did you like best?”

“It wasn’t what is ‘best.’ I like the Japanese people and all the stuff they have access to. I grew up under communism, but there were things I liked there too. As a kid, I really didn’t know that it could be different. I find that there are aspects of America I also like. You don’t seem as worried about how you are perceived here.”

“I only went skinny-dipping once,” I said to defend myself.

He shook his head at what he considered my foolish behavior. I got that he was over 30 and reminded him of that every now and then.

“You might be surprised by how much we worry about what others think,” I continued. “It is actually an obsession with most younger people. Their whole self-worth is wrapped up in how many likes they get on social media or what their classmates say about them. I think the only difference between here and Japan is that they have more rigid rules about acceptable behavior. In America, acting out is sometimes considered cool,” I explained.

“That is why the girls in Japan all swoon over the bad boy, David A. Dawson,” he said, waving his hands over his head like a swooning teenage girl.

He was amusing sometimes.

“You ask girls here, and I’m the All-American good boy who sometimes misbehaves. I like to keep a balance. You know, the whole yin-yang thing that complements itself.”

“I see. You’re a much deeper philosopher than I first thought. Do girls really like a deep thinker?” he teased.

I bit back some witty comments about what girls liked deep.

“I think they just like that I’m up for almost anything. Girls just want to have fun, after all,” I said, blatantly stealing a song lyric.

“When you’re my age, they just want their next husband.”

“Next?”

“Yeah, by now, they’ve been dumped by their starter husband.”

“You just have to be careful that they’ve actually dumped, or been dumped by, their first husband, though,” I quipped.

“Sage advice,” he admitted. “What about you? Have you figured out what you plan to do after high school?”

“What you told me about chasing too many things at once makes sense. I had a scare recently when my son was abused by his caregiver.”

“Was he harmed? Is he okay?” Tsuyoshi asked, suddenly concerned.

“Yes, he’s fine. Luckily, a friend of mine arrived in the nick of time before any real damage could be done. I owe her a lot. And not just for that. She also trains me to stay in shape and helps me with my self-defense skills.”

“A woman teaches you self-defense?”

“She’s my age, actually. She is scary good, and I would be hard-pressed to protect myself if she seriously came after me.”

He just nodded as he took that in.

“She’ll be here after the first of the year. I would like to introduce you to her,” I said.

“I’d like that.”

“Anyway, to get back to what we were talking about, I’ve asked my family to help me figure out how I might consolidate or combine my various endeavors. My son being roughed-up made me realize that family is more important than anything else when I consider future plans. I need to find a way to have them in my life.”

“What about when you leave to shoot your movies next summer and fall?” Tsuyoshi asked.

“They’ll still be too young to travel all over the world with me. I couldn’t see disrupting their lives like that.”

“Like I said before, in China, I didn’t know any different. Children are more resilient than you might think. It’s not like you would put them in any physical danger,” he said, playing devil’s advocate.

“The only problem would be their mothers and mine. I would have to talk them into that before it could happen.”

“You make a good point. American women do seem too opinionated,” he allowed.

I snorted out a laugh.

“Dude. Never, ever tell them that.”

“I’m wiser than you think,” was his retort.

Most men thought they were. It’s been my experience that when men try to fool their women, those women figure out their man’s true nature sooner or later. And God help them when that happened. All I had to do was look at my buddy Yuri as a prime example. You could quickly become dateless when word got around.

“I have some good news,” he said. “I got the role on Altered Carbon.”