Chapter 4

Six months later, at the estate of Isabella Rossellini in rural Connecticut...

“So, that’s our prenatal vitamin schedule, guys! Each of us ladies must follow this to a tee. Even you, Izzie, and yes, I know that it’s your own house, but this is for your own good!” Monica Geller insisted in her own classic, anal-retentive way.

Naturally, Monica squirmed as she tried to ignore the way that Richard Burke’s cum leaked from her naked ass, Tim’s from her pussy, and Chandler’s down the side of her face. She was a little sore, of course, but that was to be expected after pulling her twelfth train of the day. On Sundays like this one, it was a wonder that she got anything else done, but she was Monica, nothing if not organized as fuck. The fact that she was pregnant and still didn’t know the paternity of her baby was something that she made a point of pushing to the back of her mind. It was worth it to have the kind of close bond with friends and family with benefits that she had nowadays, wasn’t it?

“It’s funny how none of us ladies knows who the Daddy is in each case, but no one really cares! I mean, hell, I could be carrying Joey’s baby, for all I know, or Ross’s, but it doesn’t really matter, does it? Not even if it’s Chandler’s,” Nora Tyler Bing snickered as she rubbed her very sore bottom now.

“How many cocks did you just take up your butt, anyway? I know that I took at least eight today, maybe even as many as ten,” Helena Handbasket/Charles Bing told her/his once and future wife.

“Six in that hole, nine in my twat!” Nora giggled a bit as she recalled taking on that much dick, “it helps to have an extra hole, you know. Saves time, for one thing. By the way, thank you for providing cock number nine for my puffy slit. I loved it! My favorite time to get fucked is when I’m almost too sore to handle it. Almost.”

“Ready for our trip to the mall, guys? Just wait another year, when we’re running together with baby strollers. People will tuck tail and run at the sight of us, how many ladies all pushing our strollers ahead of us? It will scare the crap out of ‘em!” Rachel thought of the possibilities.

“Are you kidding? They’re already running for the hills when they see this many pregnant girls at once! All of our baby bumps together, no less! There’s already talk of ‘what’s in the water’ lately! Oh, I fucking love how hot and bothered this amulet makes us!” Phoebe shouted while grabbing her twin sister Ursula’s booty to prove her point.

“Yeah, I’d never want to go back to the way that things were before! This is the best way to live!” Melanie giggled as she made out with Joey again and sat on his lap, “see, getting married this way ain’t so bad, is it? You’re still a macho Italian guy, but now you have more fun!”

“Well, you didn’t say anything about marriage, but I have to admit that the way that you do those lasagnas ... and that ziti ... and that turkey tetrazzini! And those stuffed peppers!” Joey’s eyes bugged out as he realized just how great a cook his future bride was.

“And not one person that you know thinks less of you for letting your fiancee suck their cocks and ride them into the dawn, do they? You’re still this awesome Italian actor who’s terrific in bed and has the finest dick ever! And your tongue, Joey ... I might have to keep putting basil or pesto on my pussy and ass! You went from great to outstanding in the past month alone at eating me out! And you were already the most cunning linguist of all my boyfriends ever!” Melanie confessed while sucking Joey’s cock again.

“Okay, can you wrap that up or table it for later? We ladies have more maternity clothes and nursery gear to buy, okay?” Monica reminded Melanie, who then squeezed out Joey’s spunk from his prick and balls like a tube of toothpaste.

“I’m gonna walk around just like this, too, with Joey dick on my breath and Joey cum in my mouth! Yummy!” Melanie warned the rest of them.

“Cute, blondie, very cute!” Monica laughed and tried not to think of how Joey and Melanie had both fucked her into next week last night.