Chapter 2

When Helen woke the next morning, she didn’t register that she felt brighter. Not light-hearted, exactly, but perhaps lighter-hearted. She didn’t notice that she was willing to swing her legs out of bed, that she moved quickly to the bathroom, enjoyed the heat of the water on her body as she showered. She ate her breakfast, muesli, semi-skimmed milk, wholemeal toast and marmalade, and she did it smoothly, thinking about the coming day. What to do? Shopping for food, certainly. Might as well call in at the library. After her coffee with Glad.

Dressed, she set out for the prom. It was a gloomy, dank day, though thankfully there was little wind. A few waders poked around in the mud, undisturbed by her passing; geese and swans on the river, a few ducks, and a small, dark bird which kept diving for what seemed like a long time; a little grebe. The river was low, with the usual wide banks of mud each side. Tide coming in? She thought so.

The Barge Tearooms were open, warm and welcoming, as was Glad, who smiled when she saw Helen. “Your morning constitutional?”

“Yes. A bit gloomy today. Everything’s dripping.”

“So what is it today?”

“I’d love a hot chocolate, but I think I’ll go for a skinny latte. I’m afraid I’m going to get fat.”

Glad looked her up and down, then glanced down at her own ample figure. “I’d think you could afford to put a few pounds on, dear.”

“Maybe. Maybe. But these days, once it’s on, it’s difficult to shift. I’ve worked so hard to stay slim. Though dammit, it’s not done me much good, has it?”

Glad disappeared for a moment to start the coffee. When she returned, “You should get yourself a toyboy, dear.”

“What? What young man would want a middle-aged divorcee?”

“One who appreciates a beautiful, mature, woman, Helen.” Glad disappeared again and Helen heard the sound of steam heating milk. When she reappeared, Helen was handed a cup of milky coffee. “Mark my words, dear. You’d have no trouble finding a man. If you wanted one, that is.”

Holding the cup and saucer, Helen stared for a moment. “I have to admit ... I do miss...” She trailed off.

“There you go, dear. Mark what I say.”

From there, Helen walked briskly into town, bought some basic supplies, entered the library, and scanned the shelves in a desultory sort of way.

“Helen?”

She jerked round at the sound of a male voice saying her name. There, in stained jeans and a navy-blue guernsey, was Geoff Billings.

“You’re looking good,” he said. “Happier than the last time I saw you.” When she didn’t say anything for a few seconds, he went on, “I admit I’m a little surprised to see you here.”

She managed to gather scattered thoughts. “Yes – after you left that diner, I decided to make a complete change. Since I had no reason to go anywhere in particular, I thought I’d give Maldon a look. Everyone’s so friendly.”

“They are.” He laughed. “Mostly, anyway. I just ignore the others. You’re obviously fairly settled if you bothered to join the library.”

“I suppose I am. I’ve rented a flat on a six-month lease. I suppose I’ll have to decide in March, maybe, whether to extend for a year.” She looked at him, considering. Quite good looking, in his way. Not over muscled, but obviously fit and active. Six feet tall? Something like that. She could wear heels if she was with him. Did that matter? She thought about Gladys’ advice. If she was going to pick a ‘toyboy’ ... not that he was a boy ... he might fit the bill. Unconsciously, she licked her lips.

“Did you like the diner?”

“Actually, yes. Of course it was so far out of my usual place, but I was quite impressed, really.”

“Have you tried the Crystal Café yet?”

“Where?”

“Just down the High Street. They do a great ‘All-day Breakfast’. Other stuff too, of course. I’m hungry. Like to come with me?”

She looked down at the book in her hand. No. Couldn’t be bothered. She put it back, carefully finding the correct place. “Let’s go.”

The Crystal Café turned out to be, in many ways, undistinguished. Melamine covered, fixed tables with built-in plastic seating. A television mounted well above the counter. A menu ranging from bacon sandwiches to meat pies, it could be the fast-food exemplar. But the food is good, inexpensive, and the service is friendly and efficient. Helen, dressed for the cold was, perhaps, over-dressed, especially accompanied by the young ‘sailorman’, Geoff, in his stained (though clean) clothes.

“I can’t seat you like a lady, I’m afraid,” he smiled, waving at a table. He handed her a menu. “I’m going to have lasagne and chips. Coffee. I often have their full English, but not today.”

She glanced down the extensive menu. “What do you recommend?”

He shrugged. “Whatever you fancy.”

There were six different variations on a ‘Full English’. Burgers. Pies. Omelettes. “Steak, I think,” she said. “Mash. Veg. Gravy. Tea.”

“Good enough.” A waitress arrived and took their order, which Geoff reeled off with a grin for the woman. “Now we wait,” he said. “There are newspapers in that rack,” he pointed, “if you want something to fill the time.”

“No, tell me what you’re doing.”

“Not a lot, really. Keeping things clean and shipshape. Giving tours to the occasional visitor. Helping shift boats about sometimes. Reading a lot. What about you? I thought you were heading for London?”

“I was. But after I met you, I thought, ‘why? What am I doing? What’s the point of exchanging a smallish northern city for a large southern one?’ I didn’t have any plan or objective other than leaving Newcastle. When you’re divorced, even if it’s his fault, you’re a threat to women, even if you thought they were friends, and a target for men, who think that because you’re divorced you’ll spread your legs for any man who expresses interest.” She realised that her temper was rising, and forced herself to stop and breathe.

“Wow,” he breathed. “In that diner, I could tell you were hurt, and I understand that. Helen, I want you to know, I’m not like that.”

“I didn’t think you were,” she answered, but her voice lacked certainty.

“I think you did,” he corrected, gently, “but that’s okay, really.” His right hand reached out and stroked the back of her left. “You’re beautiful, as I said before. A very attractive woman. I’d like to be your friend, but I make no assumptions about you – or any relationship we may or might not have.”

“You think about that? But I’m old enough...”

“To be my mother. Yes. But you aren’t my mother, thankfully.”

They finished their meals and drinks, and Geoff stood, went to the counter and paid the tab.

“I shouldn’t let you pay for me...”

He shrugged. “My invitation. If you want to, you can pay next time. If there is a next time.”

Helen suddenly realised that she hoped there was a next time. “Are you going back to your ship?”

“Barge, but yes. Want to come?”

“Yes, please. If I can drop these bags off at my flat.”

They stood. Geoff looked at her feet. “Flat shoes! Good. Have they rubber soles?”

“No, leather.”

“Got any trainers? Something with a non-slip sole?”

“Sure.”

They walked down the High Street to Helen’s apartment complex. She noted that Geoff made a point of walking on the outside of the pavement from her. It hadn’t registered at the time, but he’d done the same thing on leaving the library. Polite. Old fashioned. Unless it was an accident, of course. She swiped her fob across the sensor and let them in to the building, then led the way upstairs to her flat. Dumping her purchases in the kitchen and popping perishables in the fridge, she grabbed a pair of trainers and changed her footwear.

“The decks are supposedly non-slip,” Geoff told her as they made their way down Church Street towards the quay. “But it makes no sense to take a chance. Leather soles are a problem on board, sometimes.”

They reached the church just as Dulcie was emerging from the gate. “Hello Geoff! How are you keeping?” And before he could answer, “Helen! Feeling better, I hope?”

Geoff’s response gave Helen a few moments to consider. “I’m fine, Dulcie, thank you. There’s not much doing this time of year. I expect I’ll be in church on Sunday.”

Dulcie’s attention switched to Helen as Geoff finished, and she smiled at her.

“I hadn’t thought about it, but yes. I’m feeling much better.”

Dulcie’s eyes flicked from her to Geoff and back again. “Geoff is going to give me a tour of his barge.”

“Oh, they’re very interesting,” Dulcie said. “Very much a part of Maldon life. Will I see you in church on Sunday, too?”

“I don’t know,” Helen answered. “Church has never been a big part of my life, I’m afraid. But maybe.”

“Well, if you do, perhaps you’d like to have lunch afterwards with my family? There’s always plenty for an extra guest. You, too, Geoff.”