Chapter 10

“Breakfast time, I should think now!” I announced after Virginia, Edoardo, Beatrice, Michael, Sunny, DeAnna, and Daniel all finished purging in response to the booty slap transformations, “you guys need to replenish some severely depleted calories, after all.”

“I know that I burned a few calories myself,” Tricia laughed, thinking back to our last sexual encounter less than half an hour before.

“That you did, my dear. That you did,” I agreed while pinching her butt-cheeks playfully.

“Who gets your dick next, then?” DeAnna asked me, her tongue practically hanging out with lust toward me.

“You, of course,” I told her, even as I summoned Scarlett Johansson, Marion Cotillard, Emmanuel Macron, his wife Brigitte, and Penelope Cruz to join us as well.

“Hello, Alices ... welcome to Wonderland,” I laughed as I slapped each of them on the tush, sending them immediately to the head to purge.

“Well, I wondered what you would do to the former French President. I have a better inkling now,” the Fae chuckled while I got started on making breakfast myself in partnership with Tang and Sabrina.

“You’ll see how right you were. Anyway, as I make breakfast, I hereby redraw the map further. Hawaii and American Samoa are now separate from Draconia, as the Union of Hawaii-Samoa, with the rightful Queen, Abigail Kinoiki Kekaulike Kawananakoa, restored to her throne, and with Tulsi Gabbard as Prime Minister. To compensate for the loss of territory, I will take land that officially belongs to China, but practically hasn’t for decades. Taiwan is now part of Draconia. Beijing will accept, of course. They have no choice.

“Also, Singapore is part of Draconia. There’s gonna be some changes there!” I smirked as I finally resolved what to do about the Hawaii Congresswoman and the only monarchy to ever be annexed by the former United States.

“Who will be Governor?” Tang wondered as I greeted each of the newest recruits.

“President Tsai Ing-wen will serve as the first Governor, with Su Tseng-chang, her Premier, as the first Lieutenant Governor. A bit of a demotion, perhaps, but a small price to pay never to have to worry about Mainland China again. As for Singapore, it will be added to Taiwan as a city and enclave of that province within Malaysia. Its Speaker of Parliament, Tan Chuan-Jin, will serve as the first Mayor of Singapore, thus reducing its autonomy considerably. The former President and Prime Minister will accept seats in the Senate and be content with that.

“As for you, Monsieur Macron, your new post will be as French Ambassador to the Empire of Draconia. Not a bad retirement, if you ask me. A glorified kind of exile, and considering how many Frenchmen were very upset with you lately, consider that a lucky break. Louis XVI has his sans-culottes to contend with, but you have your gilets jaunes, or as we call them in English, ‘Yellow Vests,’ don’t you, monsieur? Also, inform the Emperor that I’m taking French Guiana off his hands, but since he gets Belgium and Luxembourg, it’s a fair trade, methinks.

“I’m also annexing Suriname, Guyana, Costa Rica, Belize, and Panama to Draconia, along with the Republics of Zimbabwe, Uganda, Zambia, Rwanda, and Burundi. My first pieces of African real estate. And the Sinai Peninsula is now mine as well. This should go very interesting indeed. Oh, and I’m redrawing the map to add Malta, the Channel Islands, and Gibraltar to my possessions. That’s Jersey, Guernsey, Sark, etc. And San Marino,” I announced my further redrawing of the map.

“Do try the breakfast baguette. It’s not properly Parisian, I know, but it’s a fine Ameri ... er, I mean, Draconian adaptation of your country’s excellent sandwich bread. I think that you’ll especially like the sauce that we chose to put on the eggs and ham,” Sabrina winked at the ex-President of France, who blushed a bit when he realized what she meant.

“You ... dipped it ... in your pussy?” he blurted, making his wife roar with laughter now.

“Emmanuel, I think that I should try this recipe myself some time, ma cherie!” Brigitte reacted as we all began to eat.

“There’s plenty more fun than I expected,” Tang noted, at which point, I summoned Natalie Portman, Nathalie Emmanuel, Natalie Merchant, and Natalie Dormer at once.

“The four Natalies!” I chuckled, slapping each on the bottom and sending them straight to the privy.

“That sounds like a music ensemble!” Scarlett broke her silence at last, “all I know is that I’m horny as fuck for some goddamn reason!”

“Me, too!” Penelope Cruz spoke, too, and then laughed at how she phrased it, “Poor people never did catch onto the double meaning of that hashtag, did they?”

“I beg your pardon?” Macron raised an eyebrow.

“You know ... hashtag is also pound, so it’s literally ‘pound me, too!’ That’s what happens when you don’t think these things out before you make them social media causes or whatever,” Penelope asserted.