I don’t know what possessed me to share my fantasy with her, but alas I did. I think in part, as you grow older, you realize that you missed out on a lot of “stuff” in life because you were worried about the wrong things. Someone would think you were weird or different, or you were scared to do it, try it or share it. So I made a leap of faith in our good friendship and shared my fantasy. I knew it would go no further than her and did not think she would judge. Of course it was because I was hoping she would say yes and make it happen, even though I knew the likelihood would be it not happening. She just wouldn’t be comfortable with the possibility that it could change our relationship, for the worse. And she shares everything with her husband, and I would not want her to share this so ... that is probably a no as well.
This goes back a bit. We have been teasing each other for quite a while. Sexual innuendo and otherwise. Recently I found out her husband bought her some Ben Wa balls. It has been fun asking about them and causing her some embarrassment. Years and years ago now, well it seems, she did a boudoir photo shoot. I had played a part in helping her get up the courage to try it. She had fun with the shoot and to my delight shared those pictures with me. Nothing naked, and covered up at least as much as she would be in a bikini, however, the tone of the pictures was such that there certainly was a sexual underpinning to the shots. She is/was beautiful in the pictures and very, very sexy. Those shots had fueled fantasies of mine for quite a while.
More recently, the fantasies had turned from imagining what was under her clothing to her catching me in the act. The first time I thought of that, it was a huge turn on and she became a more frequent voyeur in my fantasies. How that went from a fantasy to my asking her to actually watch me was the leap of faith noted in the opening thoughts. Just thinking about her watching or maybe even saying yes causes butterflies in my stomach. Weird. That kind of sexual turn on is what happens to teenagers as they are first exploring the differences between men and women ... that first touch and be touched.
It was just another Sunday, but today I would be going into the office to have him help me finish up on a client we were working together. When I texted him to let him know I was coming, he offered wine to which I certainly agreed! The last few weeks we have been particularly naughty and inappropriate in our comments back and forth, but it has been fun and I must say I do enjoying the tease. A couple of weeks ago I asked him specifically why he enjoys thinking about the Ben Wa balls my husband gave me and I got a bit more than I bargained for in response. After detailing his thoughts on that, he let me know that he imagines me watching him masturbate and it is a huge turn on for him. I must say, the thought of it does cause my tummy to tingle, not to mention a bit lower as well. So the joking the last couple of weeks has mainly been around watching ... yummy.
When I got to the office, it was all business, well business and wine, until he ran into an issue that he had trouble figuring out. At that point I think he decided he was done for now and would think on it and indicated that he had something for me to read. He seemed very nervous and finally I said “well” at which point he opened a window on the computer that had several paragraphs he had written. The long and short of it was, he wanted to make that fantasy of his come true and he wanted me to watch him. Wow. It did indeed get warm in his office. From the way it read, he was willing to do it right then, but left me an out and said if it was too much, it should be considered an open invite. I had had enough wine to consider saying yes and certainly wanted to say yes, but I really had to think about this a bit first. I asked him if he would tell his wife about this, and he said no. He also knew he was rationalizing it because it was just watching and nothing more like touching etc. I guess I can see that. A little anyway. I told him I would keep it as an open invitation.
She says, “well” at which point I figure I am all in and open the word file for her to read. I started to watch her read to try and judge her reaction and she looked at me, smiled and asked me not to, so I went back to figuring out why the numbers were not working for this client. I was on pins and needles. I was sharing a very sexual fantasy with her and she is not my wife and I really do not want to cause her any problems, but am so hoping that this will fit within her worldview. Watching has to be OK, right? We can just pretend that she caught me. I ask if she is finished and she says no, she is a slow reader, but I know better. She is probably re-reading it for the second, or third time to make sure it says what she thinks it said. Oh boy ... tick tock. Finally she finishes. And says nothing for a moment and then says at this point it needs to be an open invitation. OK. That is better than a no. Then she starts asking some questions, and stammering a bit and I try to answer. I don’t even remember what the questions were at this point. This would have been so much easier if she would have just said yes and I could have gotten on with it! LOL! Right.
We finish the wine and the discussion and she decides she needs to get going.
As I walk out to my car I am trying to keep composed. I cannot believe he asked me that. Part of me really really wants to, but I am afraid it will impact our relationship in a negative light. And is it only once, or more, or what if I get so turned on I want to touch myself? Part of me wants to go right back up there right now and either catch him in the act, or if not, say “yes.” I can’t though. I need to go home to my husband and be me and think about this.
I suspect it will take her a few days to figure this out. In the meantime I’ll tease her when I can and we’ll just see what happens.
The next morning I text her and say I don’t want to get up. She texts back and eventually tells me to put on my tights and cape and get my butt into the office. Well, little does she know I have some tights that I use for hiking to keep my legs warm. I should wear them under my pants and then show her when she asks about them. However, since my office is already really warm, having tights and pants on will be ridiculous. OK, different plan. No tights, but when she asks about them, I’ll ask her if she wants the long or short answer. She’ll take the long answer, for sure. The long answer my dear is that if I had worn them, you would want to see them. I would show them to you and they are quite revealing, without shorts worn over them. However, from your standpoint that is indeed the point of checking out the tights ... not so much the tights, but the package. Since I am willing to get naked for you, you can check out the package anytime, so I decided to be comfortable today and not wear the tights. Ha! Ball is still in your court.
Well, on Tuesday she comes into my office late afternoon and says “my answer is yes.” My stomach literally does a flip flop and the butterflies are crazy. Wow. She has already decided and the answer is yes. Somehow she must have rationalized it as nothing more than watching a naughty movie or such. I am glad she said yes also because I think this will open a new level of trust between us, as I will be really laying myself out there, so to speak, as will she in watching and helping me fulfill my fantasy. Frankly I think this will enhance our friendship in ways we cannot imagine at the moment. But for now, let’s just focus on the “yes.” Going to have to figure out a when. Needs to be a night after everyone has left for the day, or a Sunday. Both have risk as to someone coming in and disturbing us, but it is relatively minor risk indeed. I suspect a Sunday will be easiest.
I cannot believe I said yes. It just felt right though. I want to help him explore this little fantasy of his. Heck, my husband and I have been together since high school, so I have not seen a lot of real live naked men, ok only one, so that alone will be enjoyable for me. I’ll just watch and my husband will certainly be the recipient of my built up sexual energy. So really, in the end he wins! Hopefully this Sunday will work for him, as now that I said yes it is about all that is on my mind. This is going to be my personal porn show.
I just got a text from her and she is on her way to finish up a couple things at the office. As soon as she texted I pulled the cork from the bottle and started to enjoy some wine. I think I’ll need a little liquid courage to get through this. Although, every time I think about it I get so hard that perhaps this will be easier than I am imagining. We’ll see.
She arrives and I pour her some wine. We talk about general stuff, the weather, the fact that there are lights out in my office, ... nonsense. Basically just talking around what we are both there to do. Finally, after pouring her her second glass of wine, she says “well?” As is well, what on earth are you waiting for, get on with it! LOL. Give her a little wine and she gets sassy!
I tell her that I thought I would have needed a little encouragement from a movie I have, but in the end I don’t think I do, but would she like to watch it anyway. She declined that, and I turned my chair towards her. I look her in the eye and she in mine and I reach down and start to caress myself. She glances down at what I am doing and then quickly looks back up, as if embarrassed to be watching. I said it is OK, that the point was I wanted her to watch and she looks back down, this time for a longer period of time. Her eyes on me is having considerable impact and I am really hard. I unsnap my pants and slowly unzip the zipper.