Chapter 8

Book 8

I struggle to accept that it’s only just over a week since we’ve seemingly turned yet another corner in our relationship. On one hand it feels like it was yesterday but on the other, it feels like something that happened so long ago. Perhaps her being ‘off limits’ with her period right now is fuelling my memories.

It’s strange because now that it’s over, now that she spent the whole night with him, it just doesn’t seem to have been that big a deal. Perhaps her attitude and how she was when she came home helped my acceptance as I do feel very much closer to her as she says she does with me.

I asked her what she liked best about her night with him. She hesitated and instead of answering asked me what I had been thinking about and what made me the horniest! Her response made me think that she was getting very clever about dealing with this.

I paused before answering, gathering my thoughts, then I just told her that it turned me on to think of her waking up with him, naked and them both being together. She said she wasn’t convinced that would make me horny given how I had reacted about them being together beforehand.

I told her the truth, that she was right, it was something that I’d not been happy about at first but I told her that afterwards that I found the memory incredibly arousing; that my wife had actually spent the night fucking another man all night.

She kissed me and hugged me and seemed relieved at what I’d said and I asked her again, what did she like the most. She smiled, giggled and quietly said she’d enjoyed falling asleep with him and then she said even more quietly, “with him still in me”. When she saw my smile, that confirmed my answer to how I felt about that, she started to open up a bit more and said that she loved being able to just totally relax after having awesome sex. Then she said it, “like afterwards with you”.

I had dreaded hearing her say something like that for I knew that one day I would hear her start to make comparisons, to be comparing the two of us. To hear her say it that way, even now almost a week later, her remark is still is there, fixed in my mind. She didn’t say it again and I don’t even know if she knew what she said but I remember it. The weird part is that a week later my dread has been replaced by me loving and thinking of her like that; able to give herself to him and now, hopefully, not being scared of telling me more.

It must have been Tuesday night when we had sex again. Afterwards, as we lay there I asked her, “so, what position was so good with him?”

She was in that giggly mood as she lay next to me and she just said something about how it was how she had described it in her last note to me, “with me on my knees.”

I had to go back and read the part in her note that she’d written. I found it, read it again and even now I’m horny thinking about her.

Actually, I re-read most of what she’d written to me. It is more like a book in that she told me things I had only guessed at or fantasized about. (I shall copy it here.)

She really opened up about everything and, true to her word, has made it sexier than the last note. I think it’s incredible how she described things and I may send it in to Penthouse ... if she’ll let me!

There is so much more that she wrote that might explain why I both cringe and almost cum at the same time reading it. To hold her in my arms now, knowing some of what she’s shared with Peter, it’s really an incredible feeling.

I am actually almost shaking as I’m pasting this in below. I feel like I’m baring her in front of everyone; I kind of like that feeling.

(As I read it over again I saw that I need to tell you that earlier in her note she said at one point how Peter likes her to refer to her pussy as her cunt, or at times, his cunt. She doesn’t usually like to use that particular word so it’s very interesting that she uses it here... )

“ ... when we go back to the room I hope to satisfy that part of his desire. I have told you before of how he likes to have me doggy-style when he really needs to fuck me instead of make-love to me. The only way I can describe it is that I am his “bitch” for as long as he needs me to be. I know it sounds horribly crude, but after I strip naked again and my cunt is still wet and open from the first time, I just love to get on my hands and knees at the edge of the bed and present myself to him.

I’ve looked back over my shoulder at him as he looks at me in that position. In the mirror I’ve seen how I look and it is obvious that I am in that position for him. And just like a female dog in heat, I almost long for him to fill me, almost as if there’s an ache or an emptiness that he needs to fill.

Steve, at this moment I am all Peter’s. You remember we read that Penthouse Letter story where the woman described being “mounted” by her stud. When Peter truly WANTS me, I give myself to him fully. I lean forward with my head against the pillow and I present my cunt to him. There is nothing else he wants at that moment, so I simply give myself to him. And the thing is that I WANT TO that I WANT him to take me. At that moment, when I know he needs it, I present myself to him and make it clear that he is to use me as he wants to. Not as I want him to but any way he wants. I am so wet and open that he slips effortlessly into me. The wet slurping sounds would disgust me if they were not also so erotic. Somehow lying there and presenting myself to him at that moment is just his invitation.

And take me he does. I’m sorry if this bothers you but at that moment Steve, I want him to fuck me hard. I want him to push into me and feel how wet and open I am for him. I want to feel his hands on my hips pulling me back onto him over and over. For those few moments, the entire universe consists of his penis deep in my waiting vagina. The idea and knowledge of my being so wet from his sperm earlier is almost enough to make me cum. But when I feel his hands grasp my hips and causes me to move in unison with him. Oh god, it is just wonderful. It is only surpassed by the moment when I feel him hold my hips firmly and thrust in me so deeply and almost violently that I begin to cum just from the physical sensations. Finally, after what seems like even hours of time, I can now tell just when he is ready to fill me again. After so many times with him I now know just how he feels as he is on the edge. And all he wants me to do is lie there leaning forward “presenting myself” to him.

Finally, after what seemed like hours I can feel him on the edge. His penis seems to swell up even more and he begins to get erratic until just a few moments later he will pull me so firmly back against him and then I will feel him climax in me.

I don’t always cum when he does, but when I know he has orgasmed in me there is this incredible rush of emotion and warmth that sweeps over my body. I push my ass and my cunt back towards him trying to encourage him to keep going as long as possible. But oh the emptiness after he is done and gone after pulling or slipping back out of me. And even though I may not actually have an orgasm with him, as I have told you before, the feeling I have at that moment is almost pure fulfilment and satisfaction. There’s this sense of having fulfilled what god wanted when he designed our bodies, there’s this deep sense of fulfilment knowing I have provided for Peter much as I do for you...”

Now, imagine that there is at least 3 or 4 times more of what she shared with me in that note! It is incredibly open, especially knowing how Suzanna is about talking about this stuff.

It was alarming when I first read it, alarming and exciting at the same time. I will say that she ended it so nicely. If you were to read what she’s written, you would know what I mean, it was very calming and even now I still re-read it after posting the part above. But I have to say that re-reading that part above and thinking about her like that, it is driving me crazy to think about.

I know she gave a lot to Peter and I’m okay with that as I know it was what she wanted. I certainly know how she was afterwards and I do love the sense of how satisfied she feels. When I do look at her now or when we’re in bed together I do think about Peter now knowing her as intimately as I do in so many ways, knowing she shared her body all night long with him. I also know from how she’s been with me, even with her period, that it’s been a good thing for us so far. Hard to express but that is how it feels.

Unfortunately we only had time for a ‘quickie’ on Thursday night before she announced her period had arrived a few days earlier than she’d expected. We haven’t had much of a sexy mood since then either so there’s not much more to share.

She did ask me if we could keep up our Wednesday’s as a night when she knew we wouldn’t be having sex. She teased me a bit and said I could still imagine it’s because of Thursday’s and that she’d play along with that. So I said okay to keep the desires going, but I suspect she was pms-ing on Thursday as she wasn’t totally there after a busy day.

I’ve been quiet here because it’s been quiet at home. Suzanna’s period ended yesterday but she did say she wanted to continue our Wednesday-denial and I think she may have even been surprised that I didn’t pester her last night! However, she seems to be horned up tonight so I suspect once the kids are in bed we’ll pick up where we left off last week.

I’m still very enamoured of her and what she did. It still seems like a dream but when I see her changing either into her pyjamas (just a long t-shirt) or into her clothes in the morning all I can think of is her doing the same with Peter. It does still make me a bit queasy feeling but at the same time, my god, my cock just seems to stiffen up on its own!

She’s been somewhat quiet about the whole thing so I guess I will have to start with the supportive comments and open discussions to get her to feel good about it. I think she may still be concerned about how I felt.

I do want to encourage her even if it means she wants another overnight with him. I also want to encourage her to maybe look beyond Peter as I do think she may like something a bit more frequent than an occasional overnight. I hope to hear her tell me what she really wants. At this point, I’m okay with either.

I’ve re-read her note to me so many times now and enjoyed myself to it several times over the past few nights with her out of commission! I do want to watch her; I think I can take it, I mean in my mind I’ve already gone through everything possible that they could do, but I do know it’s going to feel weird to see and hear her cum with him. I sort of feel like I need to do it, and I’m hoping, will also include him doing the same! I honestly don’t know how I’m going to react to it but I do want to find out.

It was quite an interesting weekend which actually began last Thursday evening after I’d added my last comments here.

Suzanna and I were in the bedroom getting frisky and at one point I said something to her about having her, “like Peter did”. Well, that seemed to really ignite her desires because not more than a few minutes later she was kneeling at the edge of the bed just as she was with him.

We’d had a bit to drink and she was surely feeling uninhibited and I loved it. She leaned forward and I asked her if this was how she was for him. She nodded and then she reached back and sort of grabbed her butt cheeks and spread herself open and she just said into the pillow, “this is how he likes me”.

That was quite the moment for me, it was one of the first times that I’d truly looked at her and realized just how into fucking him she was. Her pussy was opened up for me and she was wet, visibly wet, and it turned me on to think that she was maybe thinking about him at that moment.

I can see why he loves that position. Her hips are just the right height to grab onto and pull her back. I was very horny by then and knew she really wanted me to take her so I did. She had one of her hands rubbing away at her clit and every now and then she’d slide it down and just gently grasp me as I fucked her and tickle my balls too.

My orgasm was already building up as my own fantasy went through my head but she then started telling me how she loves for Peter to do this same thing to her and that really got me boiling inside. She was cumming too, her fingers made sure of that, and I cannot put into words how horny I felt at feeling her cumming on me and thinking she surely did the same with Peter.

The idea that Peter was where I was, feeling her pussy opening up then clenching down on him, knowing he could feel her cum just as I was totally drove me crazy. When I let myself think of how he must have felt just as I did, trying to hold back as long as I could. Every time I pushed into her she would push back against me. It was incredible.

Sometimes you just feel connected and at that moment I could feel it. She leaned forward with her face into the pillow and arched her back and I knew she wanted it. It was that same position she’d described and the same position that Peter felt too. She arched her back and pushed her pussy towards me and I was in her as deep as I possibly could be when I finally came too. It was intense, probably one of the best orgasms I’d had in a while. Her whole body shook as I held onto her.

She was embarrassed afterwards that she’d shown me some of what she’d done with Peter and it would take me to tell her I loved her and to hug her and kiss her before she said, “are you really okay with all of that?”

I just smiled and held her and said, “yes, as long as you and I still have what we just had, I’m fine with it”.

That led to quite a bit of relaxation on her part. She would later tell me that she still felt very hesitant and cautious after sending me that note and then my knowing what she was doing. I told her again that it was incredibly arousing to think of her that way and that I wanted her to have all of what she wanted.

Over the weekend she came out with the thoughts that she misses her times with Peter and that the overnight was very intense for her. I pushed her and she said that she felt a little scared at how easily she went into it with Peter with little thought of anything else. She didn’t come out and say it but I suspect she may not be totally comfortable with herself, maybe for how she felt with him. I pushed her a little bit and I asked her if she wanted to do another overnight with him at some point. I was surprised when she said an almost eager, “yeah” at first but then she said, “Well, maybe not as long or something like that”.

I asked if she felt okay about it and she said, something about still thinking about it and that’s when she said she missed the Thursdays more than she’d thought she would.

That part she was very open and comfortable about. She said she enjoyed the times that she’s shared with him, that they were very special to her and she totally enjoyed them. She said something about the overnight maybe being ‘too much’. I didn’t want to push her into opening up if she wasn’t ready but when I asked, “what do you mean?” she just answered, “nothing; just something I’ve been thinking about”.

Last night as we got settled in, we both knew we weren’t going to have sex as between dinner and the hot day, we were both pretty tired but we did talk and she did finally come out and say that she’d been doing some thinking. She said, “if it’s okay with you I would like to find someone for something more regular” and then she said quietly, “like it was with Peter”.

I told her that I’d support whatever she wanted and I even offered to help find someone for her but shook her head and said that she’d let me know if she needed my help. I just answered that she’d done good the first time so I trusted her.

I haven’t asked her about watching her again but I do want to this week. I think with the warm temperatures here that she’s getting hornier as she usually does in the summertime, so the timing could be good.

Tonight we continued our no-sex Wednesdays. She knows it turns me on even if she’s not seeing Peter tomorrow. I do know she misses it but I want her to decide what she wants; I just continue to be there.

I did ask her earlier if she was thinking about him and she nodded. That turned me on a lot, enough to know I want her to do whatever she wants so I just said, “it’s up to you what you do, I’m okay with whatever you want” and that was sort of it.

She smiled and said I was sweet and then added, “But you’re still waiting till tomorrow”.

Apparently the whole quickie mid-day thing never worked for them. It seems that work got in the way and everywhere has changed so that everyone is busier. They did do it the few times that I knew about but she couldn’t remember the last time.

It now seems quite normal now on Wednesdays that Suzanna encourages me to go into our office and find some porn to masturbate to.

This past Thursday night was prom-night so our son was out most of the evening. We had some wine with dinner and by the time our daughter was in bed Suzanna was very horny.

Ever since she spent the night with him I have her naked below me and I nudge her legs apart and start to play with her. If I just let myself think of her doing that with Peter I am instantly hard and ready! It’s all mental but it’s so intense to just let myself think about her with him.

She wanted it hard and once again turned around onto her hands and knees at the edge of the bed. We were both pretty worked up and when we finally got in my favorite position (her on her back with her knees apart and next to her tits!) she started saying stuff to me, trying to get me more and more excited.

She told me how Peter liked this position too and then she rolled to one side and pulled one leg way up and straightened the other. I followed her right over staying in her the whole time. She giggled and said that was how Peter did it too and then she said, “this is a position he likes a lot too.” With that she sort of pushed her ass up and back towards me and her pussy was just there waiting for me. She told me to kneel over her thigh and to, “take me like Peter does”.

I cannot tell you how that turned me on. The idea that this was a new position she’d tried and liked with Peter and was now sharing with me was just incredible. She felt so tight in some ways in this position but a little lubricant made her feel so damn good. She pulled her one knee up even more and it made her pussy open up just so that I felt like she pulled me right into her. I was ready to burst when she told me to lean forward and pull her knee in my elbow and hug her from behind. I did as she askedand pulled her knee up and it seemed her pussy just gaped open when I did this.

I knew he was physical with her but she felt like a rag doll under me as she seemed to just keep cumming. I was just about to cum in her when in between her moans she said, “This was how Peter fucked me before we fell asleep together with him still in me.” No, she didn’t say it quite like that, she more sort of grunted it out but I heard her and, Wow, that was it, I exploded in her like never before, a flood of cum gushed out of me! She squealed and even I could feel how hot it was in her pussy.

We’d both just sort of passed out and more or less just drifted off into a pleasant post-fuck haze. A little later I felt her move and I realized she was straightening her leg out and I again thought of what she said about her and Peter having done just what we’d done. All I could do was just look at her back, feel her breathe next to me, feel my cock still slick between her ass cheeks and the tip still in her pussy and damn if I didn’t start to get hard again!

The idea that this was what they’d done, that she’d possibly cum like that with him; that he’d taken her like that, made me feel so proud of her letting herself really go. It honestly didn’t bother me in the least that it’d been Peter fucking her or that she’d given herself so freely to him if this was truly how she was; it just made me feel really good about it all. I know they may have slept the night like that and yet it really didn’t, and still does not, bother me. We did wake up a short while later when it was getting closer to our son getting home and she seemed almost embarrassed as we got out of bed. I held her in the bathroom and just asked calmly, “did you cum like that with Peter?”

She still seemed hesitant to reply so I told her I loved her and that I hoped she had. She seemed to calm a bit and then quietly said, “More”. It took me a second to realize she was answering my question and I just hugged her and kissed her and told her that I loved that she’d had ‘more’ with him than we’d even just had. She wouldn’t look at me but as we hugged I said, “Are you sure?” I pushed her head back and held it so I could stare in her eyes and said, “As long as you come home to me afterwards, I will always love you”.

We didn’t really talk more as our son did come home shortly afterwards.

Again last night I knew she was just as horny as me but I also knew she was still embarrassed and quiet about telling me anything. I finally just said to her, “can’t you see it turns me on to hear what you do with him?” I added something like, “I know he makes you cum and I hope he makes you scream”. Then I just came out with it and asked her if I could watch them again.

She looked like a deer in the headlights. She didn’t say anything at first but then just said, “do you really think you’ll be okay?”

I nodded and said yes.

Then she said it, “can you be okay watching him and me like we were last night?”.

I said, “I think so and I want to”.

With that she smiled - actually she smiled a lot - and then she started to talk!

She said she has been very hesitant about everything actually since last December when I tried to watch them. She said that when I left she just felt like she was hurting me and she couldn’t take that and that, yes, she certainly did have good times and such hasn’t felt comfortable doing more with me or sharing more with me since. She said she just felt like she didn’t want to hurt me despite everything I’ve said since. I assured her I’d meant what I said and I wasn’t sure what else I should have done to make her feel better with all of this.

Then she just said something like that now she knows I want to be there with her again and share it with her that I’m guessing she finally may believe me?! She said that when I’d hesitated or not even mentioned wanting to be there and watch or be a part of it that she’d felt sort of weird about the whole thing at home and doing more even though I said I wanted that.

It felt weird; I guess it was sort of similar to my moments of epiphany when I made myself finally understand that I was okay with Suzanna doing this with Peter to whatever degree she wanted. It sort of made sense and thinking about it again today, I guess maybe my running out of their room just as she began to open herself up to him may have left her with bad feelings inside.

We started to kiss and mess around almost immediately and she was very passionate, VERY passionate. She told me all sorts of things as we fucked - it wasn’t making love, we were fucking - she wanted it and I was more than ready to give it to her again.

She started that slut talk again, “He stayed in me most of the night ... It felt good having him so deep in me” and other stuff but when she said, “he loves cumming in me” bingo, that was it, I shot off like a cannon and she followed right along.

I rolled off her and started laughing at what she’d finally shared, that she wanted, maybe even needed me to be there with her before she’d believe it, as if all those Thursday nights weren’t enough!

That’s it, she’s been wicked happy and wickedly up for it since then. She’s bouncing around the house today and she said that later tonight she wants to get a calendar out. I didn’t know what she meant till she whispered, “so we can figure out what night will work for us silly!”

Suzanna kept to her request for Wednesday to be a no-sex night for us. Thursday evening came around she teased me quite a bit before we actually got to having sex. She said she wanted to act out the evening the same as it used to be when she’d be with Peter. I didn’t understand what she was saying until she left me downstairs watching TV at about 9pm when she put our daughter to bed.

I went upstairs maybe 15 minutes later and our bedroom door was locked and I could hear her soft moans inside and a faint buzzing noise. I knew she was masturbating with one of her toys. I stood outside the door for a few moments and then just thought to what she’d said about wanting it to be like other Thursdays had been.

I went back downstairs about 9:30pm and said goodnight to our son and to my surprise he said something about, “mom already said goodnight” that she was going to bed early so about 10-15 minutes later I went back upstairs and this time the door was unlocked.

She had the lights dimmed in the room, a dirty-movie was on the TV with the sound turned down and she was lying there under the sheet on the bed reading a Penthouse Letters magazine. Her clothes and underwear were on the floor next to the bed. She smiled up at me so I just undressed and slipped in next to her under the sheets and moved in to kiss her.

She turned her head to me and said, “You’ll have to wait till Peter is done” and with that I pulled the sheet back to find that she had her blue ‘gel’ dildo in her pussy set to a low-vibrate speed! I got on my knees and watched as she pulled it out of her pussy and then gently pushed it back in. From the lubricant bottle sitting on the headboard I knew she was very wet. It was obvious she’d cum a few times already from how swollen her pussy looked to how hard her nipples were! I reached down and took the end of the dildo from her and took over being Peter and finishing her off. I felt her cum again as I pushed it in and out of her.

Finally after she’d caught her breath she took my hand off and she pulled the toy out of her now well used pussy. All she said was, “Mmmm, Peter was good but now it’s your turn” and then she added, “I hope he didn’t leave me too messy for you!”. Before I pushed myself into her she handed me the lubricant and I didn’t need to be told what to do.

After her last orgasm not more than a moment earlier my lubed up cock slid right into her wet pussy which was still opened up from the dildo. She put her legs around my butt and pulled me into her more deeply. She was really opened up inside and I slid all the way in without any resistance and, my god, was I hard inside her.

She whispered, “Do you like how I feel?” All I could do was nod and moan, “mmm hmmm” back to her. At that point she started to really turn it on saying stuff like, “This is how I’m going to feel if you have me right after Peter has finished.”

Her blue dildo is pretty big (it’s about my length but it’s much thicker than me) and she told me it was fat like Peter and how Peter really liked how she felt after their first time when they spent the night together. She made a point of telling me how this was sort of how she felt that night, VERY open and VERY wet inside.

She then asked me if I thought I was going to want to, “be with her” the night I come to watch them together. Just hearing her ask me that almost set me off. I managed to tell her that I didn’t know she would want me to and that I remembered that Peter wasn’t into a creampie from me and then she killed me with her reply, “I just want to know if you want to feel how I feel” and she added, “I didn’t mean I would want you to cum in me!”

Wow, I exploded in her at that statement. It was a tremendous event to hear her say that to me, that she might actually ask me to NOT cum in her! She laughed at how I just let loose from what she’d said and said, “We may just have to see about this won’t we?”

Friday morning she continued on with her re-enactment of her time with Peter. She got up and remained naked while she pottered around the bedroom before we had to go down to the kitchen to make lunch for our daughter and to start getting ready for work. As she stood in the bathroom she caught my attention and pointed to the wetness that was seeping out of her and said, “Oh my, Peter really left me messy didn’t he?!” Once the washcloth was wet she proceeded to put one foot up on the toilet and let me watch her clean up. All I could think was that this was how she and Peter probably were the next morning after she had stayed over.

Friday night we were both horny again and she continued on with her teasing, this time telling me that she and Peter were close to figuring out when I could come and watch them. She told me again, almost excitedly, that she really did want me to be there with them and that she hoped I would be able to be okay. I told her that I thought I would be okay and that I definitely did want to give it a try.

She teased me again once the kids were off for the night. She locked the bedroom door behind us and as she just got undressed said, “This is how I like to be for Peter”.

We had some wine and watched another blue-movie on the TV and all the while she just sat there stark naked sometimes sitting ‘Indian style’ in which position her pussy just gaped open. She saw me staring and said, “Peter loves to look at all of me like this” and with that she raised one knee to let me see more of her pussy.