Chapter 61: Celebrations

May 29, 1995, Chicago, Illinois

“Happy seventh birthday, Pumpkin!” I said when Birgit walked into the sunroom on Monday morning.

“Thank you, Daddy!” she said with a huge smile.

She climbed into the chaise, kissed my cheek, and snuggled close.

“Who’s coming to your party today?”

“Tiffany, Rachel, and Joey from school; Francesca and all my cousins!”

‘Cousins’ had become the shorthand way of referring to the gaggle of kids who hung around the house regularly - the kids of all my friends and those of some of the NIKA staff. The adults would have their own party - our usual Memorial Day cookout, which meant, from Birgit’s point of view, there would be nearly a hundred people at ‘her’ party.

“Sounds like fun!”

“Mommy said all the mommies and daddies will be here, too!”

“That’s right.”

“I talked to Katy yesterday! I’m flying to see her after we go to Russia!”

“I know. You’ll fly on a plane by yourself and Katy and Amy will meet you at the airport.”

“Because I’m a big girl!”

“Yes, you are. Let’s get some breakfast!”

“Cuddles!” she demanded. “Two minutes!”

For that, Birgit always got her way. THREE minutes later, we went to the kitchen to make breakfast for the family.

“Happy birthday, Sweetie!” Kara said when she came into the kitchen.

“Thanks, Mommy!” Birgit said, hurrying over to get a hug.

“Happy Birthday, Birgit,” Jessica said, getting a hug as well.

“Thanks, Mommy!”

The scene was repeated as her siblings, Amanda, and Jon came into the kitchen over the next fifteen minutes. We had breakfast, then after showers, my wives and I, with help from Michelle and Elyse, began getting things ready for the afternoon parties.

The parties were a blast, and Birgit thoroughly enjoyed all the extra attention. Neither Terry nor Penny came to the house, though Bart brought Amber and Andy. Bart let me know that the kids were staying with Alice and him for a week, which only confirmed in my mind what Terry had said about things being over between Penny and him.

“Did you have a good day, Pumpkin?” I asked that evening, when all the guests had left.

“Yes, Daddy. Thank you for the party and the presents.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Cuddles before bed?”

I held out my arms and she climbed into my lap.

May 30, 1995, Chicago, Illinois

“Hi,” Penny said sullenly when she walked into the office on Tuesday morning.

“Hi, Penny. How are you?”

“OK, I guess.”

“Let’s go sit in the «yōshitsu» room so we can talk privately.”

Penny sighed deeply and followed me. Kimmy had a pot of tea waiting for us and I poured some for each of us.

“We put you on vacation for last week,” I said.

“Thanks, I guess.”

I’d expected Penny to be defiant or combative; instead, she sounded depressed and resigned.

“Penny, I need to apologize to you. I didn’t give proper thought to your career, and our arrangement kept Dave or Julia from doing the same thing. I’m sorry. I really am. I messed up.”

“But I’m the one who messed up! Not you!”

“I actually think you got it right the other day when you pointed out how NIKA is treating you. Let’s fix this, OK?”

“Fix what? I pretty much wrecked everything.”

“I don’t think you’ve wrecked everything. We can work through all the stuff at NIKA. You’ll need to talk with Dave, and he’s going to be pretty tough on you, and you’re going to do what he says. And once you do that, we’ll discuss what you want to do. You, me, and Dave.”

“That easy?”

“It’s not going to be easy. You need help.”

“I know,” she sighed, sagging back in her chair. “Jackie told you?”

I didn’t want to betray the confidence, or take away a possible source of help, but I had another out, one which had its own set of risks, but ones I could manage.

“Terry called me on Saturday. We had a drink and talked.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt him. Or the kids. It’s just...”

“Just what?”

“That all of this is because I didn’t understand myself. Do you know where I messed up?”

I was pretty sure where I had messed up, but I knew she’d never agree with the assessment I’d made nor the conclusion I’d reached. Given everything that had happened, I had a sneaking suspicion about what she was going to say, and it twisted my stomach in knots. I took a deep breath and let it out.

“We haven’t really talked enough recently, which is part of the problem. Where did you mess up?”

“When I was sixteen. You and me.”

When we’d called it off and agreed she’d work for me and we wouldn’t be lovers. But I suspected there was more.

I nodded soberly, “I’d put it about eighteen months before that. And I suspect it’s way more complicated than either of us realize.”

“You think it was wrong to have sex with me when I was fifteen, don’t you?”

I shook my head, “It really is complicated. It wasn’t sex, in and of itself; it was pulling you into an adult world before you were ready. Your mom was very concerned about that. Bart gave you the benefit of the doubt.”

“He always did,” she said. “I talked to him yesterday when I dropped the kids at my mom’s house so they could hang out with their friends at Birgit’s party. I told him everything. I mean all of it. He just listened and didn’t get on my case. I think he agrees with you. He doesn’t blame you, though, because he knew it’s what I wanted. Mom would flip out, obviously.”

“What did you say to her?”

“Just that Terry and I needed some time without the kids.”

“Did you spend the day together?”

She shook her head, “No. He checked into a hotel on Saturday. He’ll stay there until he leaves for Dallas. I guess he has work there this week?”

“Yes. How much did you two talk?”

“It started and ended when he figured out I was having another affair. We’re through.”

“Why, Penny?”

“Boredom? Anger? Depression? Stress? Who knows? Pick one.”

I’d put it on growing up too fast or getting pregnant too young. Or both. All of which led back to how our relationship had developed from the day in August of 1983 when she stuck her head over the fence. She’d been fourteen then, and I’d been very careful until Anala and Jackie had pushed me to recognize what was going on in Penny’s mind. The problem wasn’t that Penny was thinking that way, but that I didn’t truly stop to consider the ramifications.

In some ways, it was the same thing which had happened with Melanie and Jennifer with regard to my sister, or with Cindi and Cèlia, when Cindi’s comment had caused me to think differently about Cèlia. That was what had happened with Penny. In each case, an inflection point had passed when a close friend had revealed something I’d missed. OR, in the case of Cèlia, that hadn’t really been there, but which was brought about by a change in my thinking.

With Penny, it was more like with my sister, in that Penny DID have the feelings which Anala and Jackie had observed. And once they’d said something to me, I’d put myself on the course that led to Penny being in my bed on our joint birthday. There was no question in my mind she wanted it, and sex, as I’d said, wasn’t really the source of the problem. The source of the problem was a fourteen-year-old girl hanging out with adults having insufficient life skills to help her deal with the things which she would encounter.

That wasn’t going to be an issue with my kids, or most of the ‘cousins’, either. All of us were giving our kids the necessary freedom and exposure to the adult world to be ready to deal with it as teenagers. Penny was, in some ways, more like the High School and college students we were seeing nowadays - sheltered and protected, and without the emotional and mental skills to function properly in the adult world.

“You left one option out of your list,” I said. “Me.”

“Did you ever once try to get me to do something I didn’t want to do?”

“That’s not the point,” I replied gently. “Sometimes being an adult means saying ‘no’ to things you actually want, or things you realize might be harmful for the other person. You weren’t ready to join my circus when you did.”

She shook her head, “I don’t agree. Well, maybe not completely. Mom wouldn’t let me grow up. My biological dad and Bart both would. Kind of the opposite of most dads, except you and your friends.”

“And not all of my friends,” I said. “Karl has very different views on child rearing. And Dave and Pete are kind of in between. Those are just a few examples, and there are a wide range of views on this.”

“But none of them are anything like your mom or my mom.”

“True. But you see my point, don’t you?”

“I do, but I’m not sure I agree. I had two chances to head this off. You remember I asked for a time machine to go back and tell my nineteen-year-old self to be monogamous? The other option would be to go back and tell my fifteen-year-old self that I would actually like the arrangement you have.”

“I don’t play the ‘What if?’ game for a reason. We have no clue what would have happened. Maybe it would have worked out; maybe not. I have no idea what Kara would have thought of having you in that kind of relationship, and you weren’t ready to have that kind of relationship. Would the sixteen-year-old Penny put her tongue places she never imagined?”

“Uh, probably not.”

“Exactly. But that’s all just hypothetical thinking. In the here and now all we can do now is try to sort things out and move forward.”

“How did you make it work so well?”

I laughed softly and shook my head, “I didn’t. It’s been one problem after another. We’ve had relative peace for the past eighteen months, but it’s never been easy. And to say it worked well is a gross mischaracterization. You and I haven’t talked a lot about stuff like that since you married Terry, but I wouldn’t recommend my lifestyle to anyone.”

“But you made it work!”

“Have I? Maybe. Yes, things look good now, but they’ve looked good before. I think the best thing we can say is that we’re making it work.”

“But isn’t that what you say about all marriages? That they’re hard work and need constant attention to keep them on an even keel?”

I nodded, “Yes, and mine is way more complicated than most. Maybe there are three people in the world who can really make this work as an equal trio without any drama, but as I said, I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone. As for you, what I would recommend, in fact, insist on, is that you get some professional counseling.”

“Bart said the same thing. He’s getting me a referral from a friend of his at UofC who’s a psychology professor and has a part-time practice.”

“Good. I’m sure you know I’ve been in and out of therapy, mostly in, for the best part of seventeen years. I wasn’t prepared for the adult world, nor for a lot of things I’ve experienced. And that’s why I’m not sheltering my kids. I think it will do you a lot of good to see someone professionally.”

“I know,” she sighed.

“One thing, Penny. In Illinois, there is a law which requires all psychologists to report ANY suspected or known sexual abuse. The age of consent was seventeen when we were together. If you tell a counselor ANYTHING about us having sex, they’ll come after me.”

“Now? More than ten years later?”

“The mandatory reporting law makes no exceptions. If you tell a psychologist we had sex, he or she HAS to report it to DCFS and the police. And in this case, I’m reasonably sure the statute of limitations is twenty years. So if you even mention it before you turn thirty-eight, I’ll be prosecuted and go to jail for the rest of my life.”

“Holy shit! That’s stupid! But what if I don’t name you?”

“They’ll do a full investigation, and talk to every single person they can find. All it takes is one person to slip up. One mention of a kiss. Anything like that.”

“So what do I do?”

“That’s the dilemma. According to Bethany, some states have exceptions for counseling or research. Illinois doesn’t. It’s not the best idea in the world, but you’ll have to say you were seventeen, not fifteen. And you can’t slip up. Not even once.”

“Do you know how dumb that is?” she sighed.

“Yes. Why do you think I continue to use my counselor in Ohio? And why do you think I follow the age of consent? Do you remember talking about this?”

“Yes. Stupid old men who think they can control other people’s bodies.”

“Just be careful.”

“You know I’ll never, ever do anything to hurt you. I’ll figure it out. I guess I need to go talk to Dave.”

“You do. Apologize; don’t argue. Do what he says, no matter what it is. If there’s an issue, take it up with Julia or Elyse. I can’t be involved for obvious reasons.”

“Because of our relationship?”

“Yes. I care for you deeply, Pretty Penny. You know that. Will you trust me when I tell you I’m not sleeping with anyone here except Michelle?”

“You’re telling me the whole truth?”

“Yes. Eve and I went shooting together. We’ll probably go shooting together in the future. But there is absolutely nothing going on. I’m following the rules, with the one exception granted by the Board of Directors - Michelle.”

“You don’t hate me?” she asked apprehensively.

“No way! I’ve made so damned many mistakes in my life, I’m in no position to criticize anyone else, let alone hate them. I want to help you, and if you ask my opinion I’ll give it, but it’ll be more in the form of questions you need to answer, rather than statements about what you should do. Now, go see Dave.”

“May I have a hug? I promise to behave.”

I nodded and we stood up. I held out my arms and Penny melted into them. I held her tightly for a couple of minutes, then released her so she could go talk to Dave.

“Steve, Zo was looking for you,” Kimmy said when she saw us leave the «yōshitsu» room.

“Have him come up,” I said.

Two minutes later Zo came to the glass doors, removed his shoes, and walked onto the «tatami» floor.

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Three of my people have had calls this morning from a recruiter looking to fill two senior developer roles with a competitor.”

I nodded, “Which one?”

“The recruiter didn’t say. All three people told him they have non-competes which prevent them from even discussing a position.”

“It sounds like someone’s fishing,” I said. “Given that three people have come to you about it, I don’t think we have much to worry about. You could mention it, casually, at your team meeting if you wanted, but personally, I’d just let it go and not worry about it. Did any of them happen to mention what region in the country?”

“Sung-He said it was in the South.”

“Thanks for letting me know.”

“How is Penny?”

“She’s meeting with Dave. He’ll fill you in.”

“Thanks.”

I checked my watch and saw it was nearly 9:00am, which meant it was almost time for the leadership meeting. I got up from my desk, changed shoes, and walked with Kimmy to the conference room.

“Dave won’t be joining us,” Julia said. “He has Penny in his office.”

“OK.”

We went through all of the due diligence items and, as a group, everyone agreed we should move forward. Before Kimmy took over the ‘normal’ part of the meeting, I had an announcement to make.

“Terry is going to be in Dallas until further notice,” I said. “He’s going to serve as my liaison to Dave’s team here for development issues. Obviously, we’ll work to integrate the teams, but until such time, Terry will be in Dallas. Dave is aware.”

“Uh, not to be insubordinate,” Julia said carefully, “but isn’t that my call?”

“As I said to Dave, this is in the best interest of the company and will let me manage the Lone Star division more effectively.”

“Penny?” Cindi asked.

“I obviously can’t discuss any personal issues,” I replied, then turned to Kimmy. “Kimmy, would you take us through the normal leadership meeting, please.”

The meeting only took another ten minutes, and when it finished, I followed Elyse to her office and shut the door behind us.

“For your ears only, they’re divorcing.”

“Shit!” Elyse sighed. “You’re sending Terry away to try to keep the peace?”

“That’s a side benefit. You know what’s likely to happen next week, right? Well, he’s going to work with Skye and get up to speed on the Lone Star software. If things go the way I expect them to, he’ll lead the small team that does the maintenance releases of the Lone Star software and builds the alternate GUI for our system.”

“Two birds with one stone.”

I nodded, “Yes. He asked about Colorado Springs, where he could work with Nicole, but I suggested Dallas. I told him there was a good chance a number of people there would leave, but gave no further details. He’ll keep quiet. He doesn’t know it’s Peach and he doesn’t know about Dante.”

“And Penny?”

“Still in with Dave, I suspect. He was going to have a very difficult conversation with her.”

“You know she’s going to ask...”

“I reminded her of the rules by mentioning the exception the Board granted for Michelle. And I firmly denied I’d been with Eve or would be with Eve.”

“This is exactly what Jamie was trying to warn you about.”

“I know. But I learned about business relationships from Joyce’s grandfather and I believe he was correct. Since Mikela left, there hasn’t been any trouble at all, and even the volatile young woman I share an office with isn’t going to make it an issue. Well, she will with ME, but she won’t make it a public issue. I’m sure Charlie will have a word with her.”

“Charlie is very protective of you.”

“She’s grateful for the opportunity I offered her. Remember the discussions when I first wanted to hire her?”

“Oh, I do. There were also a few raised eyebrows when Callie Shepherd went to work for M&M.”

“She did her penance. I helped Jefferson get his job with Arthur Drake’s custom programming shop and gave Mikela a glowing reference. And look how helping Jefferson paid off.”

“Figuring out what was going on with Lone Star?”

“Yes. I’d re-hire Jefferson if it wouldn’t cause turmoil.”

“You’d have a full-scale revolt on your hands.”