Rosedale MS 38769

John and Lucy Allen

I awoke after four days of struggling with the new me. The free me hated most things about where I lived. The tiny kitchen was a good thing. When I took my exercise, the traffic outside was a pain. I couldn’t get used to the cars speeding by.

The distances between the studio apartment building, and other places I needed to go was pretty far. I was in good shape, but it was still quite a distance to the nearest grocery store. Especially with a couple of grocery bags to lug home.

The idea of getting a car was scary as hell. I know most cons dream of driving places, but I didn’t. I knew that at almost fifty years old, I was too old to be think of any drastic changes. Those kinds of changes were the second greatest reasons ex-cons couldn’t make it on the outside. The greatest reasons were the old habit that die hard. I had never been a drug user and I had no criminal friends, so the first reason wasn’t an issue.

I decided that learning to cope with the changes was going to be my enemy. The way to handle it was to go slowly. I had thought that every one of those four previous days. I decided that I needed an easier way to get to the stores. It was twenty miles to the Walmart store where Lucy shopped, so that was my goal.

I did my internet research and learned that I needed a drivers license even for a small gasoline scooter. So I had started to study the laws necessary for me to get a license. For the last two days I had studied it three times each day.

“Lucy, I’m afraid I need your help again. Do you by chance have mama’s box of old papers. I need my birth certificate or an old driver’s license. I also need to take the divers license test. So how about tomorrow we take a drive to the DMV office in Cleveland.

It’s not to far from the Walmart Super Store. I can take the written test, then go grocery shopping,” I suggested. “I mean if you have time while the your kid is in school.”

“Of course, I can pick you up at 9AM at your place, and I’ll bring whatever mom kept,” she said.

“I’ll be waiting on the front porch at nine,” I said. “Lucy thanks hon.”

“Hey for a free meal, I don’t mind at all.” she said.

“Good,” I said.

I spent the rest of the day struggling with my demons. It was hard, but the feeling that I was moving ahead helped. Whether the direction was right or wrong only time would tell.

On the fifth day I awoke with the sun. I had four hours to kill so I watched TV shows on Nexflix as I drank coffee. It was mind numbing but at least I wasn’t going crazy, I decided.

While I waited for Lucy outside, I reviewed my options again. If everything had been closer I wouldn’t be going to the DMV. I would just buy a bike at Walmart. I wouldn’t have needed a driver’s license to ride a Bicycle. But that would mean riding it twenty miles one way to buy a coffee pot or a pack of underwear. Not just that, but it meant a lot of time spent in traffic, I just wasn’t up to that. So I pressed Lucy into service.