Chapter 29: The Wives Story 02 – Do You Love Me

December – Year 4

We gathered on the couch and cuddled for several hours and fell asleep. We were cuddled like that when Erin came home at 3am. She quietly woke Lynn and Lynn woke us.

“Guys, I did a lot of thinking tonight and we need to talk.”

“Oh shit, we are gonna die.” It was Blossom who said it before I could.

“I’m going to get some tea. Do you want anything?” Erin asked.

“No, we have just been cuddling and waiting for you. Go and get your tea. We will be right here.” I told her.

Erin went into the kitchen and we heard the water run and then the microwave cranked up. A few minutes later she was back with a big steaming mug. Erin sat on the opposite side of the curved couch, with the couch back between us and leaned over the couch back, looking at us.

“Paul, what you said bothered me a lot.”

“I would hope that it would.”

“Why would you hurt me like that?”

“Why would you hurt our wife like that? Why would you lose faith and think of cheating on us?”

“I never cheated on you.”

“It’s time for honesty, Erin. We are at a critical point in our relationship. I don’t mean the one between you and I. I mean the one between the four of us. I am including Blossom because she is my legal wife and she’s going nowhere. You need to tell the absolute truth. Right now.”

Erin sat quietly and took a long sip of her tea.

“I was thinking about going home with that guy. Then I wasn’t. Then I was. I was still vacillating when Mark asked me if I was divorcing you and Lynn. Suddenly I realized what I was really getting ready to do and I ran to the car and left. I was horrified.”

“I came home that night and I was so ashamed of myself. I took a shower and got ready for bed and I was going to tell Lynn all about it. I was scared that I could have gone to bed with that guy. Then the phone rang, and it was you, and everything else went on the back burner.”

“Tonight, what you said hurt me almost as much as what you didn’t say.”

“What didn’t he say?” Lynn asked.

“When he left I told him I loved him. All he did was shrug his shoulders and leave.”

“Well, after what Mark told him, I can understand that response.” Lynn said.

“I know. I know. Like I said, I am ashamed of myself for even thinking about being with another person. I was lonely and scared that the babies were wrong, and you would not be back.”

“I was trying to make the point that I didn’t know if you loved us. Were you really ready to give away this marriage for some guy at the bar. If you couldn’t think this whole thing through, we were going to have a problem. I love you Lynn. I love you Blossom. I could count off any number of reasons, but the biggest is because I know that you love me as much as I love you and we trust each other and there is a loyalty between us.”

“So, you don’t think I love you?”

“I think your definition of love might be a little less encompassing than mine. My definition of love includes trust.”

“So, you don’t trust me.” Erin winced.

“I trust you a lot less because you were weak and ready to fall.”

Erin’s eyes began to water.

“But I trust you more because you didn’t.”

“As far as love? I asked you if you could love Blossom’s babies. I didn’t ask you if you could love Lynn’s. Should I?”

“No! Of course not!”

“But only because you consider them to be yours as well, right? If you had not been there with us when we made them, you would not love her babies, right?”

“No! Of course I would love them.”

“Then there is no question about you loving Lynn’s baby if she and I were the only ones present at the conception. Right?”

Erin nodded and began to sip her tea to hide the small tear running down her cheek.

“After you and Blossom left, I was feeling really guilty. While you were gone Paul, Lynn always knew that you were coming back. I did too, but I got weak. I was feeling so guilty about that guy at the bar and I just lost it and I yelled at my wife.”

Erin continued to tear up as she looked at her wife.

“I spent a lot of time yelling and after one particularly loud portion, Taylor came into the room and asked us why we were fighting. She seemed afraid. We have never yelled at each other before, even when times were tough. I freaked and left and went to the Bar and ran into you two.”

Erin’s shoulders drooped looking at us like we had ruined her chance to get away for a time.

“Paul, when you asked if I was coming home or if I was going home with another guy, it hurt. When I said I love you and you left with that shrug, that hurt more. That sent a shock through me.”

Erin took a long draw from her tea.

“Guys, I’m scared. You are back, and you have a new wife. I mean look at her, she is beautiful. She is tiny. She has a small butt, like Lynn. She has smaller boobs than Lynn. She is a smaller woman, like Lynn. I guess now I’m feeling like I am the odd one out.”

“Add to that, Blossom is having babies with just you and now, all of a sudden, Lynn wants to have a baby just with you and I AM the odd one out. Lynn was right when she yelled at me earlier. She told me that my problem was that I was insecure. She was right. I mean look at me. I have this big butt. I have these huge tits. I am so different from these two women.”

“You mean from your wives?”

“Well Blossom is not officially my wife. I guess I was worried that you and Lynn would end up married to her and I would end up as the odd one out like with everything else.”

“Ok! Now I’m getting pissed off.”

I was holding back from raising my voice, but I could feel the redness on my face.

“Where in the hell did that line of thinking come from? What have we done to make you think for an instant that we did not love you? I might understand if you were talking about Blossom. She is a whole new part of this squirrelly equation, but you are doubting Lynn? And me?”

Erin sipped her tea before replying.

“The only thing I can think of is that I really am knocked up and my hormones are running amok! I have never been pregnant three times in three years before. My body is traveling in virgin territory.”

“Why do I not think of the word ‘virgin’ when I think of your body?” Lynn laughed. “I mean I can think of a lot of words, buy virgin is not one of them.”

“Hot?” I said.

“Voluptuous?” Blossom added.

“Wet?” Lynn chimed in.

“Sexy?” My turn again.

“Oh yeah. I like that one.” Erin tried to stop the tide.

“Luscious?” I threw out another.

“Ooh yea.” Blossom said in a sultry voice as she wiggled her eyebrows.

“Mouth-watering?” Lynn added.

“Finger-licking good?” I said with a heavy southern accent.

“Alright already!” Erin raised her arms in surrender.

“Erin, YOU need to talk to us. We are going to be shooting in the dark hoping to hit the target, but you know what is wrong. You know. When we started this relationship, it was you who was not sure. When Lynn had the incident, you were the one who knew she was guilty. You were the one that didn’t think you loved us enough to do anything to defend us.”

“When Paul was gone, you were the one who started looking at other men.” Lynn spoke as if she was coming to a realization.

“I didn’t mean to do it!” Erin yelled.

“If you wake the babies I am going to throw you out of this house!”

I must have sounded as serious as I looked.

“You did. Mark said that you started seriously flirting with men at the bar. I never saw it so that means that you were doing it when I wasn’t there. You were looking for a partner outside of OUR marriage. Not you and Paul’s marriage, OUR marriage.”

“No. No.”

“Erin, you are insecure about our relationship. Why? What is going on?”

Erin set her cup on the floor and curled up in a ball on the couch and began to cry. Lynn began to reach for her and I shot her a look and waved her off.

“Erin, I am in this relationship 100%.” I said.

“So am I, Erin.” Lynn said softly.

“I don’t know if it matters, but so am I, Erin.” Blossom piled on. “I love Paul 100% and I have fallen in love with Lynn 100%. You are the one that still has doubts.”

Blossom almost sounded accusatory.

“You have been having doubts.”

“Erin, after the babies and the past two plus years, how can you have doubts?” Lynn asked.

“I don’t know. I just don’t feel ... I don’t know.”

More tears and sobs.

“Erin, you have doubts about things in life. You have doubts about things that you should take on faith. Listen to yourself. Listen to what you have said before. You said that you weren’t sure if you loved us. You said that you could accept Blossom because I did, but not because you believed in our love.”

I took a deep breath and looked at Lynn and Blossom.

“Erin, you need to leave. You need to move in with Dara or Teri for a while.”

Lynn stood.

“We will keep the babies here for the time being and if you really do not love us, we will activate the separation clause of the contract and then we’ll decide if the babies go with you or stay with us.”