Chapter 38: Too Serious

March 19, 2001, Chicago, Illinois

🎤 Steve

“I’m sorry I had to postpone our lunch,” I said as Father Basil and I sat down at Diana’s in Greek Town.

“I completely understand. My condolences for both losses.”

“Thank you.”

The waiter took our drink orders and went to fill them.

“I have the drawings,” he said, handing me a small portfolio.

I flipped through them and marveled at Jeremiah’s work which was an interesting meld of American and Russian architecture, giving the building a distinctive, and yet familiar, look.

“These are fantastic!”

“That young man is very talented.”

I nodded, “I agree. What’s the next step?”

“Selecting a general contractor through a bidding process. The Archdiocese requires we get three bids.”

“OK. I went through a similar process when I had the basement of the house finished. Are you aware that Jeremiah’s dad runs a construction company?”

“Yes, he mentioned it in passing.”

“They did the work on my house. Does your bishop require you to take the lowest bid?”

“No, but we have to justify our decision in writing.”

“That makes perfect sense, and it’s how I handled selecting Brown to do our work. They weren’t the cheapest, but they were absolutely the best. He only uses union employees, but doesn’t tolerate any union shenanigans. He also handles all the permits and inspections. I can help you draw up the proposal to make sure everyone bids on the same thing.”

“Perfect! That is exactly what we need.”

“OK. You’ll need enough copies of the blueprints for each bidder, and we’ll put together the necessary packet of information. With regard to the iconostasis, is that something you order or something that is built as a ‘one-off’?”

“Each one is basically unique. There’s a Greek woodworker in Wisconsin who’ll help us design it and then carve each of the pieces. The construction firm would have to install it per his specifications. It’s been likened to assembling a three-dimensional jigsaw puzzle.”

“I’m sure they can handle that. If you’d like to see their handiwork, you could come by the house and I’ll show you the basement, the front porch, and the brick grill.”

“It sounds as if you’d select their bid sight unseen.”

“Given my experience, I would. But we’ll get two other firms with good reputations to bid, and then your parish council can evaluate them and make a decision. Do you have all of the funds or will you need to borrow?”

“We’ll need to borrow about half of Jeremiah’s estimated construction costs.”

“I’ll put you in touch with someone who will get you the best possible terms on a loan. Do you have an attorney you use?”

“The Archdiocese has one that we’re required to use so long as there are no conflicts of interest.”

“Name?”

“Saul Goldstein. He has his own small firm in the Loop.”

“OK. He’ll want to review your request for proposal before we submit it to the contractors for bids, and he’ll want to review the bids for any legal ‘gotchas’ as well.”

The waiter brought our drinks and we ordered lunch, and he went to put the order in with the kitchen.

“Now that we have the basic business out of the way, how is your spiritual life?” Father Basil asked.

“The last two weeks have been tough because things have been totally crazy, and I’ve had to go back and forth to Ohio a couple of times, plus try to work in time for my kids, one of whom is in a play and managed to fracture his tibia on opening night.”

“Lord have mercy! Is he OK?”

“A trip to the ER and a brace and he was back on stage the next night.”

“What did you do to manage the stress?”

“It wasn’t the stress per se, just the emotional roller-coaster. Things are better now. And while I understand your concern, we have the same impasse as we’ve always had. That’s not to disparage your faith or worldview, just to say that I set my course when I asked Kara and Jessica to marry me. I’ve always enjoyed our talks, but that’s about the limit of where you or I could go.”

Father Basil nodded, “That’s true, insofar as membership in the church goes, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t value in what the church can offer you.”

“I understand, but for now, I’d prefer to stick to the building project. I just need time to get my life back in some semblance of order. I go back to the office full-time in two weeks, and right now I have to focus on that and my family.”

“I’m sorry if it feels like I was pushing; it was just a question to see if I could help you in any way.”

“I appreciate that. And you’ll have plenty of opportunities to ask again as the project gets going. Just for now, I need to focus on family and work.”

“Call any time, Stephen.”

“Thanks, Father.”

We had a nice meal and made small talk, and when we finished I promised to have a draft RFP for him within two weeks.

[Rochester, Minnesota] 🎤 Jesse

“What did she say?” I asked when Mary came back from talking to Joy’s mom.

“She’s not the problem,” Mary replied. “Joy’s mom is OK with you guys spending as much time together as you want; it’s her dad who’s concerned. He’s worried you guys are getting ‘too serious’.”

“This is me not rolling my eyes,” I replied flatly as I did exactly that. “So what does he want?”

“Even he doesn’t know, really. I’m sure you can imagine what might concern the father of a sixteen-year-old girl.”

“A fifteen-year-old boy, obviously. So is she going to be allowed to see me? Or should I call and change my flight?”

“Let Mrs. Anderson work on it tonight and see what the situation is tomorrow. You can’t do anything about it tonight, anyway. Don and I will take you to dinner and then see Enemy at the Gates, if you want.”

“Sure.”

“Trying to figure out why parents act the way they do?”

I shook my head, “No, just frustrated. Can I ask you a hypothetical question?”

“What if she was our daughter?”

“Yes.”

“Before I met your dad, I probably would have been close to how Joy’s mom is – watchful and protective, but not smothering.”

“And after you and dad were together in Minneapolis?”

“I’m not surprised you figured that out. Please don’t say anything to Don.”

“Seriously? You have to say that? To me?”

“Sorry. You’re Steve’s kid through and through, so, no, I didn’t actually need to say that.”

“And your opinion now?”

“I generally agree with your parents. Don is likely to be a bit more protective.”

“Do you really think my dad isn’t protective of Birgit? Or me, for that matter?”

“Of course he is.”

“So Don is going to do what? Guard her virginity? It won’t work.”

“Your experience with Francesca?”

“And my Aunt Kara’s story, and my dad’s mean and nasty mom, and others. If kids want to have sex, they will, no matter what their parents think. Dad says society is doing its best to convince kids sex is evil when it’s not. Anyway, I guess we should go to dinner and the movie, and see what Mrs. Anderson says in the morning.”

March 20, 2001, Rochester, Minnesota

“I’m going to go home,” I said. “I don’t do crazy parents.”

“Don’t you think you’re overreacting?” Mary asked.

“No. One more date this week? On Friday? It’s only Tuesday.”

“He’s obviously worried about her.”

“Yes, and what he’s worried about already happened. But if she tells him, then I won’t even get to see her one time. So, no. I’m going home. I’ll call my dad after breakfast and change the reservations.”

“What about Joy?”

“What about her? I’ll call her, but the soonest I could see her is Friday evening. Well, unless she disobeys her parents and sneaks over here to see me. But then what happens to you and Don when her parents find out?”

“Are you breaking up with her?”

“I think her dad is breaking us up. Is he going to let her come to Chicago? Agree it’s OK for me to come here and spend significant time with her?”

“Probably not anytime soon.”

“So what would YOU do?”

“Honestly?” Mary asked.

“Usually that’s the best approach,” I replied.

“I’d go home.”

Mary and I ate breakfast, and then I called Joy.

“I’m sorry,” Joy said when she answered the phone.

“I know it’s not your fault.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I think I’ll just go home.”

“Are we breaking up?” she asked apprehensively.

“Is there ANY chance your dad is going to chill and let you come to Chicago or let us see each other if I come to Rochester?”

“No,” Joy sighed sadly. “I tried to talk to my mom about it, but she said my dad won’t budge. I was upset and almost said it was ‘too late’, but that would have made a mess of things for Doctor Mary and Don.”

“What about talking on the phone?”

“No more than once a week,” Joy sighed. “He doesn’t want me to ‘get serious’ with any guy until I graduate from High School.”

“Does this sound familiar?” I asked, doing my best not to sound testy.

“I know,” she sighed. “I’m so sorry. Will you still call me?”

“Yes. I really like you, but if we can’t see each other...”

“It’s not your fault, Jesse. I’m not mad at you; I’m mad at my dad.”

“So it’s OK if I go home?”

“I guess. Could you come say ‘goodbye’?”

“Won’t you get into trouble?”

“I don’t care. Just come to the front door so I can kiss you and give you a hug.”

“I’ll be right over,” I said.

We hung up and I started towards the door.

“Jesse...” Mary cautioned.

“Just to give her a hug and kiss her ‘goodbye’,” I said.

When I got to Joy’s house she was standing on the porch. We kissed, then hugged for a good five minutes, then kissed again.

“I love you, Jesse, and I’m sorry.”

“I love you, too, Joy.”

We hugged once more, I promised to call her on Friday, and then went back to Mary’s house so I could call Dad and change my flights. He answered on the first ring.

“I’m really tired of stupid parents,” I said after I explained what had happened.

“You realize that her dad knows, right?” Dad asked.

“Obviously. But he didn’t accuse her. And why say it was OK for me to visit?”

“Did Joy tell him before you showed up how much you guys were going to see each other? Or did she just say you were visiting Mary and Don?”

“I’m pretty sure she just said I was visiting them.”

“So her dad put two and two together and came up with four. I’m not saying he’s right, nor that I agree with him, just pointing out why it became a problem.”

“Oh, I know,” I replied. “His ‘too serious’ comment to Mary was pretty clear to me.”

“Let me give you Liesel’s number. Just tell her who you are and that you need to rebook your flight. Once you do, call and let me know so I can pick you up at Midway.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

[Chicago, Illinois] 🎤 Steve

“Trouble?” Penny asked after I hung up the phone.

“Just another overprotective parent,” I replied.

“Give Amber a couple of years and she’ll be more than happy to be Jesse’s girlfriend!”

I chuckled, “For some reason, Jesse has no real interest in the cousins. I suspect, mostly, it’s because they aren’t even in High School. Amber is eleven, the Jaeger girls are thirteen and nine, Alexa is nine, and Amelia is eleven. In three to five years, it’ll be a different story, though Jesse will be in college.”

“YOU were in college when I was in High School!”

“I didn’t say he’d have no interest, just that by then he’d have plenty of options. Well, not to mention Marta who’ll be fourteen this Summer when she visits with her mom, and the one I have my money on - Larisa, who turns fourteen next year.”

Penny laughed, “You and the General should have some VERY interesting conversations!”

“I’ll just negotiate with Vanya,” I chuckled.

“And Tanya’s daughter is going to accept being treated like a piece of property?!”

“I meant to ensure Jesse stays alive!”

“Katy Anisimov was KGB and didn’t kill you for banging her daughter, so I think Jesse will be safe!”

“I was the prey, Penelope! Just as I was with you!”

“Yes, but you got away from me!”

“And you think it would have been better to have sex than to have your job?”

“Asking me a ‘What if?’ question?”

“One we discussed back then, and I believe, on several occasions, you’ve admitted you made the right choice.”

“That seems like forever ago! I was fifteen! I’m thirty-two!”

“Positively ancient,” I teased. “And you spend more time with me than anyone else!”

“Minus the one fringe benefit I really want!”

“Do you? Honestly?”

“What is it you like to say? Wanting to do something doesn’t mean you should do it?”

“Exactly. Now, where were we?”

“Debugging this new module.”

I scooted my chair back next to her, and we began reviewing the code.

🎤 Birgit

“Hi, Ms. Czerwinski!” I said when she came to the door. “Lunch is almost ready.”

“Hi, Birgit! How is your break so far?”

“Pretty good. I hung out with my friends yesterday. Come in. Dad is finishing up some work and Suzanne is studying. Tiffany will be here in a minute. How is your break?”

“OK. I always try to have my lesson plans done and all papers graded so I can just relax.”

“Hi, Alicija!” Dad said, coming into the foyer.

“Hi, Mr. Adams,” she said to Dad.

I found it weird that she insisted on calling him Mr. Adams when he’d told her to call him ‘Steve’, but Dad said it was because Ms. C wanted to remain ‘professional’ because she was my teacher.

The doorbell rang and I opened the door to let Tiffany in, and then we all went to the kitchen so I could finish making lunch. Suzanne showed up about a minute later.

“How is Birgit doing in class?” Dad asked, the way he always did.

“Well, other than being a bit too smart for her own good, just fine.”

“Oh, please!” I exclaimed, rolling my eyes.

“Now what?” Dad asked.

“Her paper on the Civil Rights movement included a four-paragraph diatribe on kids’ civil rights!”

Dad laughed, “She is my daughter!”

“But she’s right, don’t you think?” Suzanne asked. “Especially with regard to the drinking age and the age of consent?”

“Two topics that are guaranteed to cause my fellow teachers to lose their minds if the paper was shared!”

“Right, but she has a point, don’t you agree? That while there are laws which attempt to outlaw some kinds of discrimination, there are others which reinforce it, and not just against teens and young adults?”

“I am an adult!” Birgit protested. “Jesse, Matthew, and I are better at running our lives than a lot of people who are older! But the government, mostly a bunch of old men, says we can’t. And don’t even get me started on parents!”

“What happened now?” Suzanne asked.

“Jesse is coming home because Joy’s dad thinks they might get ‘too serious’ and doesn’t want them to see each other!”

“How old is Joy?” Ms. C asked.

“Sixteen. They met when Jesse was at Mayo Clinic and then she came to see his hockey game. He went to visit her and everything was cool and then last night her dad flipped out! Jesse called me this morning after he changed his flight. Stupid parents! Francesca’s mom; Rachel’s mom; Joy’s dad. Ugh!”

“Don’t you think Joy’s dad is just trying to keep her safe?” Ms. C asked.

“Was it up to YOUR dad when YOU could have sex?” I asked, putting my hands on my hips.

Ms. C laughed, “He seemed to think so!”

“Ask my dad about it,” I replied.

“I know your dad’s opinion! But guess what, he’s going to watch out for you and protect you, too.”

“Duh! But he’s not going to decide who I have sex with!”

Well, that wasn’t quite true, but I couldn’t say it out loud without getting into all kinds of trouble. There was one person he COULD decide I couldn’t be with.

“May I see the paper Birgit wrote?” Dad asked.

“You haven’t seen it?” Ms. C asked.

Dad shook his head, “No.”

“I’ll show you later, Dad,” I said. “Lunch is ready!”

[Chicago, Illinois] 🎤 Steve

I came into the house just after 5:00pm and found Jessica in the ‘Indian’ room.

“Where were you, Tiger?” she asked after we hugged and kissed.

“Getting Jesse from the airport,” I replied.

“Uh oh. What happened?”

“Joy’s dad was concerned they were getting ‘too serious’ and said they could only see each other once this week. He decided to come home and hang out with his friends. Anyway, how was your day?”

“If you read police reports of two beaten and battered medical students, they were mine.”

“Now what?”

“I wrote them both up for making offensive comments about a homosexual couple who were in the ER.”

“Seriously?”

“They thought nobody could hear their stupid jokes about gays. Willy did.”

“Oh, THAT must have been fun!”

Willy was the Chief Attending and was openly gay.

“They’re lucky he didn’t expel them. Dad called them into his office. I’m sure you can imagine how that went.”

“Why not expel them?” I asked.

“Dad decided they were worth trying to save. Guess who they’re assigned to now?”

“I didn’t know the Chief Attending had med students.”

“He does now!”

“So are these two just clowns or are they actually anti-gay?”

“Dad thinks they’re clowns, so he’s giving them a chance to hang themselves, so to speak.”

“I’d have dismissed them from NIKA without a second thought. Or kicked them out of the dojo.”

“That was my take, too, but it’s not up to me. I’m pretty sure it was Willy who suggested the remedial action.”

“Well, if he can educate them, that’s a good thing. Where’s Kara?”

“She had a student show up just as office hours were ending. She’ll be home when she finishes. Would you light some incense, please?”

“Jorge?” I asked.

Jessica nodded, “It’s his birthday.”

I got the incense bowl and a stick of incense, lit the stick, and set it on the shelf in front of Jorge’s picture. Jessica lit a candle and set it next to the bowl, and we stood together, remembering our friend.

March 21, 2001, Chicago, Illinois

🎤 Jesse

“So now what?” Libby asked as we ate our lunch at the diner across from the ER.

“I guess I’ll decide what to do after I talk to Joy on Friday.”

“So you didn’t really break up?”

“Not formally, but I think it’s pretty obvious that’s going to be the result.”

“If you want a girlfriend, you should pick one of the cousins, though I guess none of them are really old enough. What are you going to say to Mia?”

“She and Jerry are a couple, so I don’t have to say anything!”

“You don’t think she’ll ask?”

“No, I don’t. She was struggling with her relationship with my dad, and she and I are not compatible as a couple, so it would just be fooling around, and that’s not her.”

“I like fooling around!” Libby declared.

“No! Really?” I teased.

“What are you doing Friday night?” she asked, implying what SHE wanted to do.

“Until I talk to Joy, I can’t say. I don’t have any plans because I wasn’t supposed to be home until Saturday.”