Chapter 78

RENT
{c}PERFORMANCE

Behind the main curtain, was a back wall proscenium curtain, and a minimum of set. The Mark and Roger living area was downstage left with an eight-foot-long table with chairs all over the place. A single padded chair where Roger’s Keytar is resting was stage right of that.

Mr. Bell was running things completely by himself tonight. We were all in cheek mics ready to go ... We were coming in from the back and sides of the audience, with Angel leading the way singing the overture called ‘525,600 minutes’.

There was lots of energy from every single cast member, not just the leads.

It finished with the lead eight characters, Maureen, Roger, Benny, Mimi, Mark, Tom Collins, Joanne and Angel on the downstage center edge, with a light on each of them, a different color for each. The others had scrambled to get back stage.

A wonderful applause, as we broke from those poses and ‘Roger’s Mom’ was at the ‘Telephone Mic Stand.’

MARK was using an old-fashioned
video camera Harold loaned us pointing it at Roger’s Mom.

He next turns the camera to ROGER

After the phone beeps again, he turns it on his own mother, who leaves a message, that includes her happy he wasn’t dating a lesbian.

Finally, the first bit of laughter came from our full house.

Followed by another message, this time from an old cohort of the two boys, Tom Collins. They have a discussion leading to Mark throwing a pouch with a key to their place across the stage, with Collins getting a minor applause for catching the hard toss.

Unfortunately, only minutes later, two thugs beat up on Collins taking him offstage right.

Collins gets to say, “I may be detained,” getting a nervous laugh from the audience.

Meanwhile, Benny shows up, (He is their long ago friend who now owns the building.)

He announces himself causing Mark and Roger grief, because he is likely there to ask for the RENT, from last year.

Mark and Roger remember things differently, believing they never had to pay RENT again.

They also discussed who was dating who these days with a number of surprises.

With a very dark stage, a spot light appears on Mark as the show’s title song begins.

MARK – Juan Scott
How do you document real life
When real life’s getting more
Like fiction each day
Headlines bread lines
Blow my mind
And now this deadline
“Eviction or pay”
RENT!
ROGER – Michael Thomas
How do you write a song
When the chords sound wrong
Though they once
sounded right and rare
When the notes are sour
Where is the power
You once had to ignite the air
MARK
And we’re hungry and frozen
ROGER
Some life that we have chosen
TOGETHER
How we gonna pay
How we gonna pay
How we gonna pay
Last year’s rent
MARK
We light candles
ROGER
How do you start a fire
When there’s nothing to burn
And it feels like something’s
stuck in your flue
MARK
How can you generate heat
When you can’t feel your feet
BOTH
And they’re turning blue!
MARK
You light up a mean blaze
ROGER
With posters...
MARK
And screenplays
ROGER & MARK
How we gonna pay
How we gonna pay
How we gonna pay
Last year’s rent!
[Although I directed and am one of the leads in this show, it is safe to make the assertion our cast is as slick and smooth as any of the productions I watched prior to our first rehearsal]

(Lights go down on the loft and go up on JOANNE JEFFERSON, who’s at the pay phone.)
JOANNE – Amy Martinez
(On phone)
Don’t screen, Maureen
It’s me Joanne
Your substitute production manager
Hey hey hey! (Did you eat?)
Don’t change the subject Maureen
But darling you haven’t eaten all day
You won’t throw up
You won’t throw up
The digital delay...
Didn’t blow up (exactly)
There may have been
one teeny tiny spark
You’re not calling Mark?
COLLINS – Steve Williams
How do you stay on your feet
When on every street
It’s ‘trick or treat’
(And tonight it’s ‘trick’)
‘Welcome back to town’
Oh, I should lie down
Everything’s brown
And uh oh
I feel sick
MARK
(Looking out the window
Up Stage Right)
Where is he?
COLLINS
Getting dizzy
(He collapses.)
MARK & ROGER
How we gonna pay
How we gonna pay
How we gonna pay
Last year’s rent
BENNY – Phillip Wayne
(On phone)
Alison baby you sound sad
I don’t believe those two
after everything I have done
Ever since our wedding
I’m dirt they will see
I can help them all out in the long run{br}

(It breaks into four people singing three different lyrics until, I cut a lot of this)

JOANNE
Hello?{br}

(The phone rings in the loft. MARK picks it up.)
MARK
(On phone)
Hello? Maureen?
... Your equipment won’t work?
Okay, all right, I will go!

How do you leave the past behind
When it keeps finding ways
to get to your heart
It reaches way down deep and
tears you inside out
Till you are torn apart
Rent!
ROGER
How can you connect in an age
Where strangers, landlords, lovers
Your own blood cells betray
ALL
What binds the fabric together
When the raging, shifting
winds of change
Keep ripping away
BENNY
Draw a line in the sand
And then make a stand
ROGER
Use your camera to spar
MARK
Use your keytar
ALL
When they act tough you call their bluff
MARK & ROGER
We’re not gonna pay
We’re not gonna pay
We’re not gonna pay
ALL
Last year’s rent
This year’s rent
Next year’s rent
Rent rent rent rent rent
We’re not gonna pay rent
ROGER & MARK
‘Cause everything is rent

The crowd must have recognized this song and really responded to it. A nice long applause. Yeah for us!

(By the phone. A HOMELESS MAN appears. On the stage apron, Angel is seated not in drag by a small Christmas tree, with a plastic pickle tub balanced like a drum between his/her knees.)
A HOMELESS MAN Jeff Newman
Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are ringing
Christmas bells are ringing
Somewhere else!
Not here{br}

(The HOMELESS MAN exits. Angel gets a good beat going on the tub, but is interrupted by a moan. He starts to drum again and sees COLLINS limp to downstage left proscenium.)
ANGEL Steve Neff
You okay honey?
COLLINS
I’m afraid so
ANGEL
They get any money?
COLLINS
No, had none to get...
But they purloined my coat...
Well you missed a sleeve! Thanks
ANGEL
Hell, it’s Christmas Eve
I’m Angel
COLLINS
Angel... ? Indeed!
An angel of the first degree
Friends call me Collins
... Tom Collins
Nice tree...
ANGEL
Let’s get a band aid for your knee
I’ll change, there’s a “Life Support”
meeting at nine-thirty
Yes this body provides
a comfortable home
For the Acquired Immune
Deficiency Syndrome
COLLINS
As does mine
ANGEL
We will get along fine
Get you a coat, have a bite
Make a night I’m flush
COLLINS
My friends are waiting...
ANGEL
You’re cute when you blush
The more the merri ho ho ho
And I do not take no{br}

(ANGEL and COLLINS walk off stage right.)

We pick things up a few moments later (The lights that are on signify it’s dark, but the audience still needs to see the actors. Stu explains it better)

(There is a knock ... I cross to the door.)

ROGER
What’d you forget?{br}

(MIMI enters, an amazing version of my little sister, with her dark brown hair in a very tight, with cleavage showing outfit. Her pants are practically painted on. She is holding a candle and looking for a match; her electricity is down, too.)
It was absolutely the best time we had done this number, her hair distracted me enough to believe I was really meeting a hot chick!

(We come extremely close to a kiss. MIMI reaches into my back pocket, nabs the stash, waves it in front of my face, and makes a sexy exit.)

Now that number they liked ... a lot. After Voice Mail 2, and Jeff’s outstanding rendition of “Today 4 U,” now in his Christmas dress ... next up was “You will See.”

BENNY (to offstage)
Hey, you bum ... yeah, you, move over
Get your ass off that range rover
MARK
That attitude toward the homeless is just what Maureen is protesting tonight.
(Holding camera up to BENNY)

You will see the beauty of a studio
That lets us do our work and get paid
With condos on the top
Whose rent keeps open our shop
Just stop the protest
And you will have it made
You will see or you will pack
(BENNY exits.){br}

ANGEL
That boy could use some Prozac{br}

(There was a nice laugh to that line)

ROGER
Or heavy drugs
MARK
Or group hugs
COLLINS
Which reminds me...
We have a detour to make tonight
Anyone who wants to can come along
ANGEL
Life support’s a group
for people coping with life...
You don’t have to stay too long
MARK
First I have got a protest to save
ANGEL
Roger?
ROGER
I’m not much company you will find
MARK
Behave!
ANGEL
He will catch up later He’s just got
other things on his mind
You will see boys
MARK & COLLINS
We will see boys
ROGER
Let it be boys!
COLLINS
I like boys
ANGEL
Boys like me
ALL
We will see.

While they sang that out on the stage apron, the curtain closed and a microphone on a stand was placed center stage. Juan and Amy go through the scene, song, and dancing of “Tango Maureen” to great applause. It didn’t look as good as I had hoped, but neither of them had ever danced before, making Jennie’s job more difficult.

Next up was the “Life Support” musical number, seven of the chairs were put in a circle with a single light on the bunch of Actors. None of them had ever acted before making this scene sound more real.

The audience really got into this sequence, laughing and applauding.We might be getting through to them.

Princess, dressed to titillate, was coming in from down stage right,, with two spotlights, singing...

MIMI – Isabel Chapman
What’s the time?
Well it’s gotta be close to midnight
My body’s talking to me
It says, “Time for danger”

We don’t need any money
I always get in for free
You can get in too
If you get in ... with me
Let’s go ... out tonight
I have to go ... out tonight
You wanna play? Let’s run away
We won’t be back
before it’s Christmas day
Take me out tonight (meow?){br}

When I get a wink from the doorman
Do you know how lucky you will be?
That you are on line with
the feline of Avenue B
Let’s go ... out tonight
I have to go ... out tonight
You wanna prowl
Be my night owl?
Well take my hand
we’re gonna howl
Out tonight
In the evening I’ve got to roam
Can’t sleep in the city
of neon and chrome
Feels too damn much like home
When the Spanish babies cry

So let’s find a bar
So dark we forget who we are
And all the scars from the
Nevers and maybes die
Let’s go ... out tonight
Have to go ... out tonight
You’re sweet
Wanna hit the street?
Wanna wail at the moon
like a cat in heat?
Just take me out tonight
(MIMI makes her way up to Roger’s door and ends the song next to me.)
Please take me ... out tonight
Don’t forsake me ... out tonight
I will let you make me out tonight
Tonight tonight tonight

(MIMI plants a huge kiss on me, and I reluctantly recoil.)
ROGER
Who do you think you are?
Barging in on me and my keytar
Little girl hey
The door is that way
You better go you know
The fire’s out anyway