Chapter 104

We didn’t actually start the planning that day. Brent and Emma had decided on a summer wedding and that gave Jess plenty of time to arrange things. As it happens, Jess and I planned both the bachelorette party and the bachelor party. Both of those were slated for July, ahead of their August wedding day.

Jess, Emma, and I sat down with Brent in early spring to discuss his wedding needs (i.e. the bachelor party. Guys don’t really have ‘wedding needs.’)

Brent had chosen his best man, a friend from the fire-station named Andre. In the intervening time, we’d all gotten to know each other very well. That meant that he was reluctant to tell us. Correction: he was reluctant to tell “me”. So he took me off to the side to tell me in private.

“Hey, so, I asked my friend Andre to be my best man. I hope you aren’t offended, Andre has been-”

I raised a hand and cut him off. “Hey, hey, no worries, man. Geez, we haven’t even known each other that long. We’re cool. Hell, I’m not even available for the job anyway.”

“Oh, ok,” Brent said, a bit puzzled by my unexpected answer. “Then I guess that’s- wait, what do you mean you aren’t available?”

“Oh. Well, your future wife insisted on me to serve as joint maid-of-honor,” I explained.

“Oh ... I see- ... no, wait, what the fuck?” Brent said, clearly baffled and shaking his head.

I sighed. “Yeah. What the fuck, indeed, Brent. What the fuck, indeed.”

- - - -

Brent’s bachelor party was arranged first. Brent’s best-man Andre was a bit miffed at not being allowed to plan it but Jess convinced Brent that it would be in his, and the whole group’s, best interest to allow her to arrange the shin-dig. While it was a bit weird letting his girlfriend’s best friend arrange that sort of thing, he also knew that it would undoubtedly by exponentially more interesting if she did.

Emma wholeheartedly agreed, knowing full well the kind of debauchery that would ensue. She wouldn’t be attending, of course. It wasn’t that Emma would disapprove of anything that would happen, just that the other attendees would no doubt feel awkward with the bride-to-be watching. Understandable.

Jess had lots planned and she asked Brent to trust her. And he did, implicitly.

- - - -

Brent’s contribution to the planning consisted of the guest list which consisted of two friends and one cousin. Oh, and me, though I’d later wish it hadn’t.

Jess would be hosting the party herself but she was going to need help so she called the number on the business card she had.

“It’s a great day at Spooner’s, home of all your favorite gifts, Amelia speaking, how may I help you?” came the voice on the other end. Amelia said it pleasantly enough with just the right amount of monotony required for something she said forty times a day.

“Hi, Amelia, it’s Jess,” she said.

“Hi! How are my favorite clients doing?” Amelia asked. Her voice perked up noticeably.

“Fantastic. A friend of mine is having a bachelor party,” Jess began.

“Ok, we have lots of items to make a bachelor party exciting,” Amelia said.

“Oh, you definitely have what I need there, but probably not what you are thinking of...” Jess said.