Chapter 7

Maureen’s mom had walked her daughter through her earliest years; her injury, those awful first months when she nearly died, the little boy who was her companion and savior, their separation, and her subsequent surgeries and therapy. Maureen listened at first with polite condescension, but her patronizing demeanor soon evaporated; fading into disbelief, then confusion and denial; and last to appreciation, an appreciation tempered with profound feelings of guilt and grief, guilt over her own insensitivity and grief for her mother’s suffering. She’d just never realized the worry and concern she’d put her mother through, nor had she understood the meaning, or power, of selfless love, unrequited devotion.

Subsequent to her mother’s revelations Maureen struggled with her missing early years, and with how to introduce Cal to their shared history. She didn’t doubt Cal; only her own inadequacies.

Across town Cal had found his grandfather waiting for him with the only personal treasures the old man had; his long deceased wife’s wedding and engagement rings. The discovery of the rings, his grandfather’s more than casual willingness to see they went to Maureen, and his grandfather’s very obvious approval of a girl Cal had mistakenly believed the old man hardly knew caused considerable confusion. Cal knew he was socially backward, often unaware of what was going on around him, but more and more it seemed like he was standing in the eye of hurricane; a storm whose force he neither appreciated nor understood.

Later that night, maybe 5:00 a.m., unable to sleep, and unraveling emotionally, he called Maureen. His insecurities had caught up with him. How could anyone as beautiful, intelligent, and dynamic as Maureen fall for a fool, a buffoon, like him? He called. She was reassuring, but he still couldn’t get to sleep. He was lying there in bed, Maggie slobbering on his pillow, still worrying.

Not that many days before sleep had never been a phantom; his head would hit the pillow, and he’d be out till morning. That was before Maureen, since then he’d started thinking. He thought about the future, his future, his future with her, having kids, thinking about becoming a husband, a father, actually becoming something. What if she did change her mind? It was driving him to distraction; when a person who never had anything and had no expectations of having anything found they had something, someone, then life became more complicated.

He felt like he was watching, or living, the movie The Wizard of Oz; in one scene everything was black and white, no color, no focus, no vibrancy; then in the next scene everything was in vivid color, alive, purposeful, and filled with meaning. It scared the shit out of him!

Cal’s cell phone rang. He opened it. It was Maureen. Oh no, she’s calling back, she’s changed her mind after all.

He tremulously spoke into the phone, “Hello?”

“Cal, why don’t you come on over right now? My mom’s upstairs. I know you’re a little scared.” He could almost hear her purring, “I don’t want you to be upset.”

What a relief! Great! He answered, “I’ll be right there.” He hesitated, “It is OK?”

She answered, “It’s OK. I need you.”

“OK,” he said. He hung up the phone and looked over at Maggie, “Come on girl.”

The drive back to Maureen’s was quiet, traffic was light, and he got there in no time. Walking up the porch to the door he knocked.

Maureen was waiting for him; she opened the door before he’d finished his first knock. She had been desperate to see him anyway. His late night call only convinced her of her need to have him underfoot that much more; like a puppy dog, she thought, he might wander off and get hit.

She was wearing a single piece nightie. A pale pink baby doll, empire waist, low cut neck line, short capped sleeves, and a hemline that barely reached the tops of her thighs. She was barefoot, had no make-up on, and her hair was in two pig tails. Cal found himself in an immediate state of agitation. God, she always looked so damn beautiful.

He told her, “You always look so pretty. Every time I see you I ask myself how I got so lucky.”

Maureen had deliberately changed into this particular nightie knowing it would have just the kind of effect it had. She liked the looks he gave her, and she liked his compliments. She’d been complimented by others, but she knew his comments were always sincere. At the moment though she wasn’t taking any prisoners, “Well you sure look awful. You need a shave. Have you slept at all? And I smell you.”

He blushed and then stammered, “I, I, I’m sorry. Oh, I mean.”

She reached up with her right hand and pulled his head down so she could reach him. She kissed him, then smiling, “I want you to look haggard when I’m not around, and I want you to be sweaty, then I’ll know you’re worried.”

He kissed her back and tried to pull her closer but she wouldn’t let him, “Maureen I’m sorry I woke you up. I got scared.”

She took his hand and walked him inside, “Come on over to the sofa. We’ll talk.”

He followed her in and they sat down beside each other. She asked, “OK, so what’s the problem?”

“Oh it’s nothing I guess. I just got scared.”

She asked, “Yeah, like of what?”

He put his right arm on the top of the couch above her shoulders, and put his left hand in her lap, “A few days ago I was a happy nobody. I worked, built a few things, had a dog, but that was it. I was happy. I wasn’t anything or anybody. Then I met you. You said, and I believe you, that you loved me. We made love. You took me over, bought me stuff, took me out to the tavern, we announced marriage plans. When I’m around you I feel important, when I’m not, well, I’m just not. Don’t you see?”

Maureen saw and understood. She felt the same way, but wanted him to say it, “Say it again, just what you want me to see.”

He responded, “Oh Maureen the other day I was nothing; I was nobody, going nowhere. Then suddenly I’m somebody; I have a life, a real life, somebody loves me, you love me. Sometimes I get scared. Look Maureen. You’re pretty, smart, popular, you have everything. What would somebody like you want with a nobody like me? You see don’t you?”

Maureen was glad they could get it all out in the open again. They’d had this conversation before. He lacked confidence, in himself and in her, “No Cal I don’t see. I mean I don’t see what you see.”

He looked at her with a confused expression.

She went on, “Haven’t we had this discussion before? Remember the night of the fireworks? I do. I remember how uncomfortable you were, but you let me lie on you. I got to be relaxed and comfortable while you were miserable. You hardly knew me. Heck Cal, you knew me as the girl who’d hustled you at pool, and you still were looking out for me at your own expense.”

He started to say something, “But I...”

She stopped him, “Shut up. Look, you’re the blind fool of the century. You’re a wonderful good looking man,” She had to put her fingers over his mouth to make sure he didn’t say anything.

“You are good looking. You’re very handsome, and people like you, not because you’re handsome, but because you’re good, you’re sincere, you’re kind, and you have a really nice smile.”

He started to interrupt again, Maureen I...”

She held her hand over his mouth, “I said shut up. Look, no one knows more about you than I do. You haven’t got a clue about what I know. I love you. Look here. I love you Cal.” She took his left hand and placed it on her left breast, “Hear it? That’s my heart. You’ve stolen my heart.”

He felt her breast. He could feel her heart beating, “I’m sorry I know I’m being stupid.”

She took his right hand down from the sofa and put it in her lap, on her vagina, she smiled, “Look what you did for me.”

He asked, “What was that?”

She was really grinning, “You gave me your cherry. I took your virginity. Do you know what that means to me, to any woman?”

He shook his head.

She pushed his right hand further down between her legs to her uncovered pussy, “Whenever I go into a bar. If I ever walk into a tavern I’ll know for sure no woman will ever be able to look at me and say, ‘I had your man.’ I’m going to be the only woman you’ll ever have.”

He squeezed her mons. He leaned forward and started kissing her. He interjected, “Isn’t that what the man’s supposed to say?”

She bit his lip with her teeth, “You can’t handle a little role reversal?”

He ignored the bite and kept kissing at her, “With you? Never!”

She kissed him back; then she asked, “Have you ever wondered about the scars on my legs?”

He stopped kissing her, “Yes, a little, but I didn’t want to pry.”

She started unzipping his fly, “Go ahead; pry.”

He asked, “You don’t mind?”

“Ask,” was her retort. By then she had his belt undone and was busily pulling his pants down.

He kissed her on the lips, then her nose. He nuzzled her ear; he used his left hand to squeeze the top of her puss, “What happened to your legs Maureen?”

She’d gotten his boxers down and was holding his thing in her hand. It was already very hard, “I don’t’ remember really, but my mom told me.”

Cal kept nuzzling her neck. He moved his right hand under her nightie and started to gently rub her back.

Carefully squeezing and releasing his man thing she went on, “When I was four a part of a tree fell on me. It almost killed me. My mom had to go to work to get extra money for the medical bills. They brought in a special nurse who took care of me. I was really sick for years. I had several operations, years of therapy.”

Cal was listening, but he was also involved with her back, her neck, and with trying not to be too aware of what her hand was doing, “Gee you’re twenty-four now. That was twenty years ago.”

She added, “You would have been six.”

He sat back. A shiver had just gone up his spine and he couldn’t quite explain it. He leaned on his side, “That’s why the guy called you gimp.”

She answered, “Yes.”

He leaned forward and hugged her close at the same time. He kissed her again. He leaned up a little and kissed the top of her head. He said something, more to himself than to her, “I would have been six.”

He took his two hands, put one each on one of her arms and gently pushed her away. He looked at her closely. His eyes sort of drifted off into space, “You were four when you got hurt, and I was six.”

Maureen got off the sofa and knelt on the floor in front of Cal. She squirmed in between his legs, and got her face close to his penis. She took the tips of her fingers and started to lightly rub up and down his shaft.

He didn’t try to stop her. He looked down and saw she was staring up at him, “Where did it happen?”

Maureen was feeling either very brave or foolhardy. She leaned her face up close to his penis and kissed the end of it. It tasted kind of salty. She didn’t especially like it, but she didn’t move her head away. She was curious and wanted to try the fellatio thing; besides, she figured, it might reassure him.

She told him, “It happened right here in the front yard.”

Cal was feeling really excited. Her touches, and that kiss went right to his head, his brain too, but he was trying to think. In spite of what she was doing and how it was making him feel he pulled her back up on the sofa, “There aren’t any trees out there.”

Maureen tried to squirm back down on the floor but Cal wouldn’t let her, “My dad had them cut down.”

She managed to squirm back down so that she was facing his penis again. Instead of fighting with her he slid down too. They were side by side on the floor, leaning against the sofa in front of the television. She tried to lie flat to get at his thing, but he wouldn’t let her. He held her up.

Cal said, “Let’s just sit here on the floor; watch one of the early movies and cuddle a few minutes.”

She kept her hand on his penis, but looked over at him, “You don’t want me to do you?”

He replied, “Yeah I really do, but I want to cuddle first. I know it sounds stupid. Nobody’s ever done what you’re doing, but I think I want to cuddle; cuddle and think a little too.” He kissed her head again, “I’m sorry, but I’m feeling kind of funny, like eerie funny.”

She reached around and got the remote, “What do you mean?”

He answered, “I don’t know. I just feel funny, like something about déjà vu. I don’t know.”

Maureen knew she’d sent some pretty strong signals. She wanted to do something to please him, but he didn’t seem to want any kind of sex at the moment, “OK, let’s see what’s on. You can think about your déjà vu.”

He took the remote, turned on the television and found the channel with the oldie movies. There was something that looked like it came out of the 1930’s; something pretty typical for the channel that was on. He saw it was some old musical, “Let’s watch this.”

She squeezed in a little closer, laid her hand on his really hard really erect penis, “You sure you don’t want?”

He moved her hand, “I do, but I want to think too.”

She let her hand rest on his thigh, “OK.”

Together they cuddled up and started to watch Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire dance. Neither knew who the actors were. It didn’t matter anyway; they were both fast asleep in ten minutes.

Andrea got up a few minutes after Cal and Maureen drifted off. She got cleaned up, dressed for work, and quietly made her way downstairs. She saw them stretched out on the floor beside the sofa sound asleep, she wondered what had happened. Maureen’s nightie was up around her waist. Cal’s pants were off and lying in a heap. It didn’t look like anything had happened though. Andrea slipped out the back door without making any coffee. She’d stop at the convenience store on the way in. The kids needed their sleep.

Maureen awakened first and saw by the clock it was a little after 9:00 a.m. Cal was still sound asleep. The curtains were drawn so it was still pretty dark in the living room. She decided to complete what she’d started earlier. She’d never done it before, but she’d read about it and seen a scene where it happened on a U-tube video once.

She carefully worked her way down to his penis. She touched it first with her fingertips. Almost immediately it started to get big. She used her finger nails and carefully stroked up and down the sides as it grew. She took her tongue and licked the end; still salty. She kissed it. Brother did that make it get big! She heard Cal sigh. His thing looked really big; she tried to estimate how big it was, maybe seven inches or so. She knelt beside his penis and put her mouth over the top. She felt it get even bigger. She wondered how big it could get. She knew it was big because she remembered how big it felt when it was inside her.

Cal squirmed.

She thought she better be careful. She wanted to see how big she could make it get. She gently kissed the end again. She put her mouth right at the end and sucked on it just a little tiny bit. It was still getting bigger, but more getting harder than bigger. She leaned around just a tiny tad and tried kissing it on the side.

She felt Cal’s hand on her head. He whispered, “What are you doing?”

She whispered back, “Don’t move.”

He started to squirm a little.

She whispered again, “If you move before I’m done I’ll bite it off.”

Cal stopped moving.

Maureen could feel his legs tense up, but knew he wouldn’t be moving. She held it in her hands and put her whole mouth over the top. She used her tongue and started to swirl it around and around the end of his thing. She felt it get a little harder, but it got a whole lot hotter too. There were curly hairs all down at the bottom and in her fingers. She thought there might be one in her nose, it itched.

She leaned back a little to look at it. Brother it was huge, and pink. She took her right hand and squeezed his scrotum. She leaned back down and put his thing back in her mouth. She swirled her tongue some more and sucked on the end again.

Cal kept very still. He knew she wouldn’t bite him, but he was still afraid to move, afraid of what was about to happen.

Maureen pushed down a little further on his thing; then something totally uncalled for occurred.

Cal couldn’t help it. He’d been ripe the night before, and even riper when he got to Maureen’s earlier that morning, and her touching him when they were talking had made it even worse. Better men than him wouldn’t have been able to hold out as long as he had. He ejaculated.

Maureen had her head pressing down on his penis. She probably had close to three inches of it in her mouth when he fired off. All this hot wet stuff went flooding down her throat. Maureen jerked back coughing and choking. As she jerked back more of the white sticky stuff, semen, came squirting out all over her face and chest. She was choking with a mouthful of semen down her throat and another mess of it all over her face, chest and breasts. It was awful!

Maureen sat back on her heels. Kneeling beside Cal she kept choking and spitting, “That stuff’s awful!”

Cal sat up, “I’ sorry. I tried to stop you.”

Maureen was up and heading for the bathroom, “That’s OK. Get dressed and put on some coffee.”

Cal felt a little embarrassed, but also really great. He’d never shot off like that before, and he liked it. He liked it a lot! As she fled to the bathroom he replied, “I’ll get it.”

Maureen came out a few minutes later, fully dressed and apparently none the worse for wear., She asked as she sat down to a piping hot cup of coffee, “Are we getting anything done on the gazebo today?”

Cal got his clothes back on after a quick coffee and both went outside; neither had much to say. Maureen was a little embarrassed by her earlier sexual peccadillo and because she wanted to watch Cal as he started to process what she’d told him about her legs.

Cal had a lot on his mind. It seemed like every time something got cleared up more showed up. Maureen had been very reassuring; his trust in her love had been validated a hundred times over, but there was the problem of her legs. Her legs weren’t exactly the problem; it was more the idea of her legs, the circumstances around her injuries that had raised new flags. Things from his childhood seemed to be coming back into focus. It was like looking at something in the mud; if only the water would stay calm he’d be able see better. It was a weird situation.

He thought, if he got to work, he’d work it all out. Together he and Maureen started the flooring. Using 6X1 planks they started nailing the flooring to the frame. Maureen was a big help hauling planks over. He began with the middle most plank, and started hammering others side by side outward. It wasn’t especially hard work, but he had to use a big screwdriver to pry each plank tight against its predecessor before nailing. He did this to minimize the inevitable spaces that would emerge as the wood shrunk with time. By 1:00 they had the flooring on. He’d made a minor mistake by starting in the middle since as he worked his way outward he realized the outermost boards wouldn’t be exactly six inches wide. He had to cut a slightly narrower plank for each side as they approached the out most edges. It worked out though, and pretty soon the flooring was done. Using his circular saw he cut away the ends, leaving about an inch lip all the way around.

Using metal cleats he laid out where the railing would go. Originally he planned to have the railing rise directly from the foundation beams, but thought better of it. He thought the whole thing would be better if the railing was inset slightly, maybe six inches. He used cleats to provide the baseline for the vertical beams, then he cut the 2X4’s for the horizontal pieces, tied everything together with Maureen’s help, and then cut 2X2’s and nailed them to the horizontal boards. He used the width of his level, perhaps three inches, as the distance separating each vertical 2X2. By 4:00 they had the rail up and finished.

It was late, but with Maureen’s help steadying, he used a ladder and tied in the vertical 4X4 railing beams at the top with 2X6’s. He realized there could be some problem with stability regarding the railing at the floor and also rafters that would follow the next day, but he thought he had a solution to those problems that would work.

The last thing they did was construct the three steps that would enable them to climb from the gravel drive to the gazebo floor. With Maureen again helping, he got the hand railing for the steps done too. He’d thought he might be able to build a small door either at the bottom or the top, but realized neither was practical.

He checked his watch. It was 6:00, and he was bushed. He’d done a lot of sawing and one hell of a lot of nailing. He knew the next day would be even harder, because the ceiling eaves were next, followed by cutting the 4X8 plywood sheathing to fit at the proper angles, then the shingles. He hoped he could get the roof framed the next day. The plywood and shingles would have to wait for the weekend.

Cal sat down on the bottom step and looked around at what they’d done. It was OK, not great, but OK. He saw the mistakes he’d made, a couple of missed angles, the mistake with the flooring, one of the floor joists hadn’t been quite level. He could tell, though he doubted Maureen could.