Chapter 9

Waking up the next morning was a sudden, pleasant transition: one moment I was asleep, and in the next, my eyes had snapped open. For the first time in weeks I wasn’t drowsy; in fact, I felt remarkably clear-headed.

I slid my arm across the bed, felt nothing, and rolled onto my side. Violet was gone, but I could feel a trace of her warmth in the sheets. Pressing my face against the fabric, I breathed in her scent, a combination of something like cinnamon spice and Calvin Klein’s Obsession.

I stretched slowly, luxuriously, feeling my body tingle and pulse with memories of last night. The straining, complex knots of conscience bound up in my desire for my sister had completely unravelled. I felt light, freed of a burden I now realized I’d imposed solely on myself. Last night just felt right. I didn’t feel a single pang of guilt, and there were no second thoughts. I didn’t even feel bad about not feeling guilty.

But something was off. I realised that the angle of sunlight through the bedroom windows was all wrong. I rolled my head back and squinted at the bedside clock. I never rose this late.

I heard humming echoing down the hall and smelled hot buttermilk. Moments later, Vi appeared in the doorway carrying a tray. She was wearing a T-shirt with University of Mars printed on the front, something I’d received from NASA while doing a story on food in space. I’d thrown the shirt in the hamper the night before. The hem fell to mid-thigh on her.

She was beautiful, fresh-faced, her skin glowing in the shafts of light through the windows. My sister smiled wide as she watched me sit up in bed. “Good morning.”

“Morning.”

Vi sat on the edge of the mattress, curling her long legs to one side, and placed the tray carefully on the duvet. “I’m not nearly as good a cook as you. But I did what I could.”

“You did wonderfully.” I slid my hand along her neck, under her sheath of dark hair. She leaned forward and we kissed slowly.

“Mmmm.” Vi’s eyes glowed we parted.

How long had it been since I’d been served breakfast in bed outside of a hotel? A girlfriend once, maybe, many years ago. I realized with a sudden ache how empty I’d made my life.

“I don’t usually ... react that way,” I said. “Fall asleep, I mean. Afterwards.”

She grinned. “You’ve been exhausted for weeks. It’s okay.” She pointed at the white plate on the tray. “Waffles, whipped cream, blueberries. And orange juice.”

“Thank you.” I paused. “We do still have to talk about this, you know.”

“Fine.” She divided a waffle up with the knife and fork, swiped one quarter through the berries and cream, and held it up to my mouth. “While you eat.” I parted my lips obediently.

The cream was Reddi-wip; the blueberries and waffles were pre-frozen. It was the best breakfast I’d ever had.

I swallowed. “No regrets?”

She smiled and shook her head. “Not a bit. I’ve wanted to do that since we were teenagers.”

“Really?”

“Really.” She speared another slice of the waffle with the fork and fed it into my open mouth. “You?”

I chewed, considered, swallowed. “Since our video chat. Before my first date with Avery.”

“Ha!” Her tiny fist pumped in the air. “I knew it!”

I grinned. “Yeah. You were right.” I circled my fingers on her ankle. “I’m surprised you didn’t want more last night.”

“Oh, I did.” She smiled widely. “I was aching for it. But you needed to sleep.”

“Not even a small orgasm?”

She shrugged. “I can cum like that.” She snapped her fingers. “It’s more fun for me if I stay on the edge. Or if someone makes me.” Her dark brown eyes twinkled.

“Vi ... why now?”

She frowned slightly. “I don’t know. I think maybe...” She set the cutlery down carefully on the tray. “You weren’t entirely wrong last night. The last few weeks have been a complete emotional nightmare. But I realized that ... Dad being gone means he can’t judge us anymore. And my mother is on the other side of the country. It just felt ... right. Now that we were finally alone together. To express what I’ve been feeling.” She looked up at me.

I nodded. “And two nights ago. Were you...”

She grinned. “A little. I wasn’t completely unconscious when you carried me to bed.” She paused. “I wanted you to go further.”

“Vi, you were drunk. I would never –”

“Shhh.” She placed her fingertips over my lips. “I know. You were very sweet.”

“But now...” My hand moved to her waist, stroking under my T-shirt. It felt like a miraculous gift to be able to touch her this way.

“Now...” Her eyes glowed with pleasure as she let my hand explore.

“I want more,” I said.

She looked down at the sheet tented between my legs and grinned. “That’s very clear. But...” The corner of one white tooth chewed against her lower lip for a moment. “We should use protection. Last night was wonderful, and I’ve always been careful, but...”

“You can’t say the same for Ted,” I finished for her. Violet nodded. “Shit.” I hadn’t seen any condoms in the house; if there were any here they’d surely be past their expiry date.

She frowned. “You don’t have anything?”

“No.”

“How long has it been for you?”

“Vi, I didn’t come here –” A flicker-flash of that dual reality passed through me: my sister was teasing me, as she had done since she was a kid. She was wearing one of my shirts. And I had my hand underneath it, cupping her breast.

“That’s okay,” she said quickly. “There’s plenty of other things we can do.” Shifting the plate onto the nightstand, she slid up beside me, tucked her head into my shoulder, and flung the sheet back.

“Vi!” My stiff cock sprang out.

“Oh, come on. You’re really going to say no? Now?” I could feel the curve of her cheek rising with her grin.

“No.” My head fell back with a groan as she wrapped one warm hand around my shaft and began to stroke.

“Good.”

My T-shirt was as loose as a caftan on her. I slid my hand around Violet’s shoulders and under the fabric. She hummed in contentment, raising her arm to provide access. The warm roundness of her breast filled my hand as if it was made for my grasp, her tight, hard little nipple scoring my palm.