Chapter 135

Clark Withers smiled broadly when he took his seat at the conference table. He and Anna Goldblum had met with Phil Warner just after lunch and told him of what had transpired Friday. Now it was time to give his presentation to the entire group.

“OK, folks,” Phil said, standing at the head of the table. “First, I need to take care of a bit of housekeeping. Our insurance carrier has notified me that we are in violation of our contract with them. Part of our agreement for lower rates is that we conduct random drug screenings on salaried employees. I haven’t really gotten around to setting up a protocol for that so, like pretty much else, we’re going to wing it. If you look in front of you, you’ll see a slip of paper with your name on it. I want you to verify the name is correct, fold the paper lengthwise and bring it up here. I should warn you that failure to agree will constitute a positive test – and we all know where that might lead.”

The executives looked down at the paper. Phil noticed that several looked worried but he would deal with that some other time. It was time for another portion of the drama to end.

Phil held out one of three Heilman College baseball caps that he’d had Hailey bring for his Hollywood friends. It was identical to the green one that Phil had worn on the plane. He watched carefully as each member of the administrative staff came forward and placed his or her paper inside. Once everyone had complied, he picked up his own slip of paper, folded it and put it in with the others.

“I’m not immune from this either,” he said as he put the cap on the floor. It was a lie. He was not an employee exempt from overtime. He was classified as an unpaid intern and he wasn’t subject to random drug testing any more than the woman who had served his lunch. But he had no intention of telling anyone else that.

“OK, we’ll get back to that afterward,” he said. “I apologize that this has become necessary. As I said, the insurance company gave us a lower rate if we included it and I didn’t think about it again. Now, let’s get on to the important things. Clark, I think you and Anna have a report.”

“We do!” Clark said enthusiastically. “Anna, would you like to tell everyone what we learned on Friday?”

“Go ahead,” Anna said. She had been the one to fill the owner in on another piece of information so she was content.

“I think we all understand how much rides on the success of our next feature release,” Clark said unnecessarily. He was correct. Everyone knew they’d be out of work if “Kismet” was unsuccessful. “We know the buzz is solid. We know that people are talking about it. Well, Friday, Anna and I decided to do a little informal polling. We’ve determined what I think Phil has always known. The movie will do well in major metropolitan areas: New York, Boston, Miami, Chicago. I think what we here missed – and what most people in our industry miss – is that the numbers don’t really fluctuate much in those areas.

“A popular film will gross perhaps a million or two more in the major cities than a terrible film will. I started this research before we needed to re-edit and got back to it last week. It all points the same way. The cities don’t determine if a film is successful. It’s the heartland – and Blu-Ray and DVD sales – that make that decision.”

Clark looked down the table at the faces. A few were nodding thoughtfully, a few were obviously giving the idea consideration – and Lewis Steinmetz was shaking his head in dismissal.

“Think what you want,” Clark told his former boss. “But, the truth is, Lewis, I could take every single time you’ve been right in the past five years, roll them up and stuff it in your tight ass and you’d never feel a thing. I’m right on this. And I can prove it.”

Lewis glared down the table but Clark was unfazed. It was another dent in Lewis’s armor that his gaze didn’t sent his subordinates fleeing in terror.

“The numbers don’t lie,” Anna said as she passed out a sheaf of paper. “I have to admit, the research involved in obtaining regional grosses was painstaking. Clark is correct. A movie that is considered a total flop will still gross well in the metropolitan areas but it loses its market share in the suburbs and in rural areas. This simple fact bodes extremely well for ‘Kismet’ and for Lambswool.”

“There is no way you can possibly know that!” Lewis hissed. The numbers in front of him – if accurate – were irrefutable. It had always been Lambswool’s policy to hit the cities hard with TV and magazine advertising and let the sheep in the sticks follow their betters to the theater. It was how entertainment advertising was done. The “coastal elites” were the target market – because that was where the funding to create the movie or music disc or television program had come from.

“We can,” Clark declared. “Granted, this is not scientific in the slightest but I think we have enough circumstantial evidence to give us optimism.”

“We called them,” Anna declared. “We picked two theaters in every state from Maine to Washington and called them. We didn’t identify ourselves. We simply told them we were conducting market research. We asked them if they were aware of any upcoming releases. We called 100 theaters and 88 of them listed ‘Kismet’ first. Only one theater in 100 didn’t list it first or second. We asked them if the general expectation for the movies they listed was positive or negative. Ninety-six percent – 96 out of 100 – said the expectation for ‘Kismet’ was positive. A full 73 percent had already begun taking pre-orders for tickets and nine more said that they wished they had thought of it.”

“That doesn’t prove anything,” Lewis grumbled.

“He just said it wasn’t scientific,” Anna said angrily. “For Christ’s sake, Lewis, if you have nothing to add, shut your trap.”

“On Saturday, we called early enough to talk to random employees,” Lewis continued. “Our Friday calls were mostly to managers and we wanted a perspective from ... lower wage-earners. We worried that it might skew our findings, you know, the economic thing and the age thing. The people we spoke to on Saturday were generally high school and college age. We didn’t get any variance. In fact, the theater workers all plan to see the movie on their days off even if they can sneak in a viewing without paying for it.”

“What we found interesting was when we asked the people where they had heard the most interesting things about the movie,” Anna added. “It was a mix. A few said they read about it online. I had assumed that they meant our advertising but Phil has noted that there are a number of Web sites dedicated to the movie. Others said they had seen or heard Courtney or Rafe on their promotional tour. Some said they had been looking forward to the film since we announced a screen adaptation last fall.”

“When you put it all together, I think what we’ve done has worked,” Clark concluded. “I think we’ve put together a quality motion picture. I think we’ve gotten the word out that it’s coming. I think people are going to go see it!”

“Maybe once,” Lewis said snidely. A large portion of any film’s gross came from people seeing the movie more than once.

Anna was instantly shaking her head.

“That’s where the quality of the show comes in,” she declared. “I think ‘Kismet’ is sufficiently layered that people will want to go back. I think the disc sales next summer are going to be huge.”

“I have two cousins traveling in Europe right now,” Phil cut in. “The word is just as good there. I think you’re right, guys. We’ve done what we can do. Now we have to sit back, let Courtney Hollings, Rafe Costas and Ella DeLoach make the rounds on TV. Anna, setting them up with a couple of bloggers was particularly astute. People my age are more likely to get their news from there than from late-night TV.”

“What have the focus groups said?” Lewis demanded.

“Nary a word, Lewis,” Phil said. “The pre-screenings won’t be for another week – and even then they will be in a controlled environment.”

“Which reminds me,” Anna said, “I have to get on a plane soon. Can we take care of the drug screening? If my name comes up, I want it out of the way.”

“Sure,” Phil said. “Let me call security.”

Five uncomfortable minutes later, the head of security and her male assistant came into the room.

“For the sake of fairness, I will allow Lois to handle the draw,” Phil said. He sat the hat on the table and stepped away. “The test is simply a matter of putting a strip of paper between your cheek and gum. It won’t take five minutes. If a female is drawn, Lois will handle the test. If it is a male, Simon will attend to it.”

Lois Calabaras reached into the green hat and pulled out a slip of paper. She opened it, looked at it and then walked to the back of the room.

“Lewis Steinmetz,” she read as she put the paper on the table in front of the man.

Bob found himself driving Hailey home from campus on Monday afternoon. She had seemed out of sorts during the weekend and that hadn’t changed once Phil departed. She had skipped lunch and had barely spoken two words since they left the school.

“Did you and Phil have a fight or something?” he asked.

“Why do you think that?” Hailey asked. She continued to look out the window, despite the fact that another mid-fall snow storm was on its way and the sky was dark and bleak.

“You just haven’t been yourself the last couple of days,” Bob replied.

“Everything is fine,” Hailey answered.

“Look, if it’s none of my business, just tell me,” Bob countered. “But don’t lie to me. I have eyes, Hailey. Something was weird Saturday and Sunday and you’re acting strange today. Phil seemed ... normal, I guess. Did something happen out there that has you upset?”

Hailey shifted her gaze from the passenger window to the driver. She wasn’t sure she wanted to get into what she was feeling with Bob Prohl. She wasn’t certain he would understand. Then she wondered if anyone would understand.

“It was Friday night,” Hailey admitted. “Uh ... I forgot to get my Depo shot. Do you know what that is?”

Bob stayed silent but nodded.

“I didn’t think about it until ... afterward,” Hailey continued.

Bob nodded again. He was studying to be a health and physical education teacher. He had a firm knowledge of reproduction and birth control devices. He also lived in a house with three women and he was acutely aware of their menstrual cycles – as much as it pained him to admit that to himself.

“Do you think you might be... ?” he asked in a calm voice.

“No, I made sure I wasn’t,” Hailey answered. Unlike Bob’s, her voice quaked when she answered.

“You made sure?” Bob asked. “How?”

“Plan-B,” Hailey said. Tears started to fall down her face.

“OK,” Bob replied. “I’m not sure what this has to do with you being upset.”

“I feel like ... I might have killed a baby – Phil’s baby,” Hailey said, now sobbing fully. Bob found a convenient place to turn off.

“I’m not trying to diminish what you’re feeling,” Bob said consolingly. “I just don’t understand why you’d feel that way.”

“Because it was after we’d ... finished,” Hailey said.

Bob reached out and put a hand on Hailey’s.

“It’s no different than taking the shot beforehand,” Bob told her. “Look, Plan-B isn’t an ‘abortion’ pill. It doesn’t create a miscarriage. It doesn’t cause you to lose a baby. It acts exactly like the Depo shot or the OCP does. It tricks the body into thinking it’s already pregnant. It keeps the spermatozoa from penetrating the egg. That doesn’t happen immediately and, even if it does, it doesn’t mean that a fetus is going to develop.”

Hailey dried her tears and looked at her only real male friend. She considered Phil to be more than a friend.

“We did a whole cycle on it in human sexuality,” Bob said. “That’s part of the health curriculum at most schools. When we get home, I’ll get my notes. If you don’t want the others to know, we’ll come back to the library or something. I’ll give you the facts.”

“I read on the Internet...” Hailey began.

“Stop right there,” Bob stated. “I want you to promise me something right now. I want you to tell me that you will never – as in not ever – take health advice from the fucking Internet. Yeah, there are a couple of places that give you the straight info. But almost everything you find there pushes an agenda and glosses over facts. In that way, Planned Parenthood is no different from the National Right to Life group. The fact is, Plan-B is simply another form of pre-conception birth control. Don’t listen to the right wingers that try to manipulate you into thinking it’s a form of abortion. Don’t listen to the left wingers that try to tell you it’s safe and harmless. It’s like any other foreign substance you put into your body. It can pose a risk to your health – just like any other form of birth control can. But, for occasional use, it is no more of a danger to you than the Depo shot.”