Chapter 11: Anger Management

April 10, 1990, Chicago, Illinois

“Damn!” Greg said. “This is the coolest project you’ve had for me so far.”

I smiled, “Remember, you can’t talk about this to anyone who hasn’t signed the NDA. And that includes Hannah.”

Hannah was his girlfriend of about three months.

“Yeah, yeah. I know. I know. Who’s going to work on this with me?”

“Penny, most likely. She’s decided to work three or four days a week during the Summer, and then in the Fall, she’s working two days a week.”

“She’s almost as good as me,” he said.

From Greg, that was a high compliment. The only other programmer he thought was close was Jeri. I honestly didn’t know his opinion of my skills, and I wasn’t sure that I wanted to!

“You know Dante is volatile,” I said, “so I’ll want you to only talk with the engineers and leave him to me.”

“You can have him. From everything I hear from Zeke and Barbara, he’s the consummate asshole!”

“That would seem to be the consensus, but he’s an asshole who pays us a lot of money and gives us interesting projects.”

“When do I start on this?”

“Once we iron out the details. Elyse and Jamie are working on our proposal now. I know Dave has enough for you to do for the next couple of weeks, at least. It’ll take at least that long to get this ironed out.”

“Just let me know! I’m itching to work on this!”

“Thanks, Greg!”

He went back to his workstation, and Jeri came to my door.

“Got a sec?” she asked.

“Sure. Come on in.”

She shut the door behind her and leaned against it.

“Does what Julia announced yesterday affect our plans?”

“No. What we’re doing is already a violation of the rules!”

“Good. I was a little worried. You know I’d never, ever say anything, right?”

“I do. The only issue Elyse raised was that we’d be taking a vacation at the same time, but it makes sense because that’s right after the big push for the alpha release of 4.0, and Jefferson is taking the same week. How are things going with the condo?”

“On track for closing on the 1st. Then I have the remodelers coming in to redo the kitchen, paint, then strip and refinish the floors. After that, the decorators.”

“And nobody knows this is going on?”

“Nope. Only the trustee knows; I had to make arrangements for the trust to buy the condo.”

“I wondered how you were going to do that.”

“Real estate is one of the things the trust is allowed to invest in, so that makes it easy. That way, my name isn’t on anything. At least not yet.”

“Did you want to do anything in San Francisco besides check off the boxes on your list?”

“You mean like sightseeing? No. The only sight I want to see is you, naked, fucking my brains out!” she giggled.

I noticed that she didn’t blush when she said that. That, in and of itself, was an important sign that Jeri was changing in many ways. And, mercifully, she hadn’t used some corny romance novel line!

“I think we can manage that,” I said with a smile.

“I started taking the Pill, too. So we don’t need any condoms!”

I was happy Jess hadn’t reimposed that hard-and-fast rule, and in this instance, I was confident that there wasn’t an issue.

“Then you need an STD test before we go, please. As close as possible to the end of May.”

“No problem. I haven’t been sick, haven’t been with anyone but you, don’t do IV drugs, and haven’t had a transfusion.”

I smiled, “Good! And yes, before you ask, I get tested a couple of times a year. I’ll have another test before then.”

“OK. Now, about the case management screen changes...”

April 12, 1990, Chicago, Illinois

“Happy birthday!” I said into the speakerphone.

“Thanks!” Bethany said.

“We’re here too,” Kara said. “Me, Jessica, and Elyse. Happy birthday!”

“Yes, Happy birthday,” Jessica said.

“Happy birthday!” Elyse added.

“I received your gifts. I really appreciate everything you guys are doing for me.”

“How’s Nicholas?” Kara asked.

“Still asking for Daddy,” Bethany sighed. “It’s going to be tough because he can’t really understand. But he’s healthy, and he likes hanging out with Ed. Mom watches him when I’m at the office.”

“And how is that going?” Elyse asked.

“Three clients is all I’m allowed to see right now. I don’t know if Ed told you that. Doctor Mercer is talking about allowing me to add one more in June.”

“Take it slowly,” I advised. “Don’t rush.”

“I won’t. And you know Doctor Mercer won’t let me.”

“How are you doing?”

“I have good days and bad days. It’ll be like that for a while. I think you know.”

“Yes,” I sighed. “Especially with Birgit, but also with Stephie. I still have occasional days when I think of Stephie, and it hurts.”

“She’s different from Birgit,” Bethany said. “You and Birgit didn’t build a relationship the way you did with Stephie.”

“True. By the way, we’re going to come down for a few days in May to bring the grandkids to see my dad, assuming Kara is up to it.”

“That’s right, he’s having his surgery. Let me know when he’s at UC, and I’ll go see him.”

“Thanks. We don’t want to keep you from your family,” I said.

“I do have a question. What’s up with your sister? Ed says she’s out of her mind pissed at you.”

“My dad and Joyce said they don’t think she’s ready to run NIKA, and they want her to work for one of the Big Six accounting and consultancy firms to get some experience.”

“That’s probably a good idea, and it explains why she’d be angry. But why at you? And I thought it was the Big Eight?”

“It was,” Elyse said. “But now we have Deloitte & Touche and Ernst & Young that were both mergers of two Big Eight firms.”

“My sister thinks I orchestrated this, along with her moving out of the house, as some kind of retribution for how she treated Jorge. I didn’t, but she has her mind made up. The problem is, she KNOWS she was treating him like shit, and I think she’s guilty about that. Now she’s lashing out so she doesn’t have to confront her own issues.”

“Her anger issues need to be addressed,” Bethany said.

“I know. It’s a matter of getting her to address them. She didn’t come to Girls’ Night Out last Saturday, and I haven’t seen her since she stormed out of my office last week. My dad told me to let her cool off, but I’m not sure I want to let it go too long.”

“Give her until next week, then try to talk to her. I’ll mention something to Ed. They talk nearly every night.”

“Thanks. I’ll talk to you this weekend.”

“Our usual Sunday morning call?”

“Yes. Happy birthday!”

“Happy birthday!” the girls chorused.

“Thanks!” Bethany said.

I pressed the button to break the connection.

“She sounds OK,” Jessica said. “I’m a bit surprised.”

“She has her counselor right there with her basically full-time,” I said. “And the most important service I provided when I was with her was a shoulder to cry on. She took full advantage of that and basically cried herself out. Doctor Mercer won’t let her stew or fall into a trap of inaction. I think his birthday and their anniversary will be bad, and Christmas will be terrible. At least the first one.”

“Do you think she’ll ever remarry?” Kara asked.

“I have no idea,” I said. “But, we need to get Jesse and get going to church.”

“It’s the Twelve Gospels Service tonight, right?”

“Yes, it is.”

April 14, 1990, Chicago, Illinois

“Hey! We missed you last week!” Pete said as Jorge came into the diner. “Whoa! That’s a good shiner there!”

Jorge smiled, “I had a difference of opinion with an unmovable object at work! You should have seen it last week!”

I wondered about that. I’d have to talk to him after breakfast. I had a sneaking suspicion that a certain little sister of mine with anger problems had visited her ex-boyfriend and lashed out, literally. But that was a question for after breakfast.

“Hey, Commander!” I said when Karl sat down next to me in his usual spot.

“Morning,” he said. “How are things?”

“Good. I spoke with Bethany on Wednesday to wish her a happy birthday.”

“Ginny called her. She seems to think Bethany is holding up pretty well.”

“She is. I think going to Milford was the smartest thing that she could have done. How are you doing?”

“I miss him. We all do. But life, and the mission, have to go on, don’t they?”

“Tell me about it,” I sighed.

“I received a copy of the orders for his permanent replacement, who’ll be here on May 7th. Another young guy. I may bring him along if that’s OK.”

“It’s up to you,” I said. “I trust your judgment.”

Pete tapped his glass with his spoon.

“Gentlemen, I have an announcement. Carston and Spencer productions will be delivering the next smash hit in November!”

There was lots of laughter and quick congratulations for Pete. That left pretty much only Cindi from my main group, who hadn’t had a baby. And she’d strongly implied that she’d be pregnant by Halloween.

“Another boy for the gang?” I asked.

“We’ll see in seven months,” Pete said. “My grandmother would say all these boys means a war is coming.”

“We have the idiot in the White House to give us one, that’s for sure,” I sighed.

“You really do hate the Bush family,” Howard laughed.

“I have since 1980. I see no reason to change now!”

“Come over to the left, Steve. We have cookies!” Alex laughed.

“Which his wife won’t let him have!” Jamie laughed. “Doctor Jessica is a rough taskmaster!”

“She’s a pussycat!” Alex protested.

“To you, maybe!” I chuckled. “I called her the ‘Dragon Lady’ when I was in the Cardiac Unit at the hospital back in December.”

“Whatever came of that?”

“Nothing. Everyone agrees there’s nothing wrong with me, except that I have syncope when I have serious external stress. It might be my low blood pressure, or it might be a self-defense mechanism of some kind.”

“He did have a brain scan, which showed nothing!” Karl laughed.

All the guys laughed.

“That’s no surprise!” Pete said. “I’ve known THAT since I first met him!”

“Gee, thanks, Pete!” I chuckled.

We had a good time at breakfast, and when we finished, I gently pulled Jorge aside.

“Stephanie?” I asked.

He looked at me, and after a few seconds, he nodded.

“Hopefully, she can learn to control her temper a bit,” he said with a shrug. “Kicking stray dogs isn’t pleasant — for the dog.”

“Shit,” I said. “She blamed you for me telling her to move to the dorms and for my dad saying she needs experience before she takes over at NIKA?”

He nodded, “Yes. Get her some help, Steve.”

“I will. Don’t be a stranger. Come to Guys’ Night and bring Trish for the Girls’ Night Out. Stephanie isn’t speaking to me at the moment. I think I’ll see if Jennifer can get through to her.”

“That’s probably a good choice.”

“I’m really sorry,” I said.

“It’s not your fault.”

Actually, it was. It was my fault. But the cause of the problem was nine years in the past, and I couldn’t go back and change it.

“I want to see you next Saturday night. No excuses.”

He smiled, “We’ll see. I’ll think about it. OK?”

“Yes.”

That really was all I could ask for. Now, I had to get home, go to church, and deal with the problem. Stephanie was at karate, but she didn’t talk to me. Kara was staying home because she was in her sixth month, and Jessica was usually still asleep when I left. When she was on night shift, there really wasn’t a good time for her to be at the dōjō, and Sensei Jim cut her some slack. She’d probably never advance even to brown belt, but she liked the exercise and had fun. It just wasn’t something that fit into her schedule at this time and potentially never would.

When I arrived home, I quickly showered so that Jessica, Kara, Jesse, and I could head to Saint Innocent for the 10:00am liturgy.

After church, we had lunch, and then I walked back to the coach house to talk to Jennifer.

“She what?!” Jennifer gasped when I told her what had happened.

“She beat him up. Well, at a minimum punched him in the face, but I suspect she did more. He’s not talking.”

“I’ll call him later. I don’t want him to cut himself off from all of us because of her.”

“That’s what I told him, but maybe coming from you, it’ll mean more.”

“It means a lot when you say it, Steve. But it is true that a woman’s touch sometimes helps.”

“Sometimes,” I smirked with an arched eyebrow.

“I find it amusing that you’re still attracted to me in that way,” she said gently.

“Amusing? Excuse me?” I said, feigning outrage.

“You know what I meant! I love you more than any man on this planet!”

“But not more than any woman,” I sighed.

“No. But we’re not here to talk about us. That issue was done and buried when we made Jesse!”

“Oh, it was buried all right!” I teased.

Jennifer laughed, “Men and their dicks! Anyway, do you think your sister will talk to me?”

“I have no clue. She needs help, Jen. I told you what she said about me.”

Jennifer nodded soberly, “I thought she was past that. You are.”

“It was easier for me,” I said. “There are those occasional pangs, but it’s like the pangs for Birgit — fleeting and far between. But I have five, almost six, kids, two wives, and two lovers.”

“And she had Jorge until she pushed him past where he could possibly go,” Jennifer said.

“She and Ed Krajick seem to be trying to put something back together, though I don’t know if she has her head on straight about it or not. Probably not.”

“Let me try,” she said.

“Thanks.”

We hugged, and I took Jesse with me back to the main house to finish preparing our Pascha basket.

April 15, 1990, Chicago, Illinois

Jennifer came into the great room and asked if I had some time to talk. My wives and I had just gotten up from sleeping after arriving home at about 6:30am following the Pascha service and party.

“If it’s OK with my wives,” I said.

They both agreed, so Jennifer and I went to my study, and I shut the door behind us. We sat side-by-side in the two wingback chairs which faced my desk.

“I talked to her. Well, I listened to her rant about everything under the Sun. She feels abandoned by everyone.”

I nodded, “I’m not surprised.”

“I talked to Jorge about the incident that led to the black eye. She went to his place, started screaming at him about how he was responsible for her losing her home, her job, and her brother. I guess he asked her to calm down and talk rationally, and that’s when she attacked him. She KICKED him after she knocked him down, Steve!”

“Shit,” I sighed. “I have to tell Sensei Jim, and THAT is likely to get her kicked out of the dōjō.”

“Which will only make things worse,” Jennifer said. “I tried to get her to agree to counseling, but she flat-out refused, saying that she’s not the problem; you are.”

I sagged in the chair.

“How did we get to this point?” I sighed.

“Because back in High School, none of us understood the implications of what we all encouraged you to do. Now, even counseling is fraught with terrible danger because if your sister were to tell a therapist about the incest, they would have no choice but to report you. And your sister is in just the kind of mood where she might blurt that out, or worse, maliciously say it.”

“Fuck! So now what?”

“I don’t know for sure. I have to be VERY careful in how I talk to her. She was wary, as I’m sure you can understand, but she did at least lash out at you so I could hear it directly from her. I just don’t know how long she’s going to talk to me, if she even will again.”

“She’s going to have to hit rock bottom before she changes,” I said. “But the problem is, that could destroy everything — herself, my wives, my kids, my parents, me. At least she’s keeping up on her coursework, or so Melody says.”

“That makes sense if you think about it. She finishes with top grades, gets a great job at one of the accounting firms, and that proves that you and your dad were wrong about her. But the fly in the ointment is that if she doesn’t deal with the anger issues, she could lash out at someone at work, or a customer, or be arrested, and then all of it will go straight down the drain.”

“You’re just full of good news,” I sighed. “I have no clue what I can do.”

“Are you going to tell your karate instructor?”

“I don’t see how I can avoid it. If it gets back to him that I knew about this and didn’t tell him, there would be hell to pay. The only way I can see clear to not do it would be for her to tell him herself and say that she was getting help. I’m not sure what he’d do at that point, but I’d do my best to convince him to allow her to continue to attend.”