Chapter 20

Reg sat in a chair facing the Dean, and waited.

The Dean cleared his throat before declaring, “Mr Robertson, it has come to my notice that you have arranged for a commitment ceremony next week. Is that correct?”

“Yes sir.” Reg was not offering anything. He had learned to be careful.

“I understand this is not a simple cohabitation agreement, but something more complex.”

“Yes, sir.”

“You and four other students – girls - are proposing to live together as a family unit. Is that so?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Would you care to avoid saying ‘yes, sir’ to everything, and instead give me some explanation about what is going on?”

“Sir, I and the four ladies concerned have fallen in love with each other, and are sharing a home belonging to the parents of one of the girls. We intend to live together as a family on a permanent basis, and this ceremony is the equivalent of a marriage ceremony as far as we are concerned. A friend will be conducting the ceremony, where we commit ourselves to each other in public.”

“I see. You are not afraid of the possibility of a charge of bigamy?”

“No, sir. Bigamy requires one partner to have been previously married and still legally married, and conducting a second marriage with a new partner. This is not the case here. None of us are in a marital relationship, and the ceremony commits us all at the same time. Even if it was a marriage, there is no sequential marriage involved, so it does not fit the definition of bigamy.”

The Dean looked at him again, with a seriousness evident on his face. “The complaint came to me from the university chaplain, so I have to view the matter with some concern.”

Reg looked at him with some alarm. “Oh, dear. I did not realise that the chaplain might feel snubbed at not being asked to officiate. Perhaps I should have a word with him, and offer him a belated opportunity?”

The Dean laughed aloud, in his surprise.

“Robertson, you are a card! The Chaplain did not want to to officiate. In fact, she – the chaplain is female, Mr. Robertson – she saw it as being near as dammit illegal.”

“Illegal, sir? In what way? There is no legal contract involved. It is a social device, forced on us by the law of the land insisting on monogamy as the legal definition of marriage. I would quite happily have the chaplain marry us all if the law allowed it.

Please assure her that we are doing nothing underhand. We are completely above board and public in our commitment ceremony. All our parents have been invited to attend, and if you wish an invitation, we shall be happy to oblige, sir. One of my intendeds is waiting outside for me, should you wish to ascertain the bona fides of our commitment.”

“Is that so? Perhaps we should invite her to join us.” He buzzed through to his secretary. “Mrs Taverne, please invite miss...” he looked at Reg, who whispered, “Prudence Gower”; “Miss Prudence Gower to join with us in my room?”

Quickly, Prudence was escorted through, looking unsure of herself. The Dean took a careful look at the tall, thin, woman, for a moment, then said to her. “Please sit down, Miss Gower.”

When she was comfortably seated, Prudence reached out and took Reg’s hand for support. The Dean took note of this.

“Miss Gower, please relax. I have been discussing your commitment ceremony with Mr Robertson. Is it true that five of you are committing to each other for life?”

“It is, sir. We love Reg and want to spend our lives with him. He is a most attentive boyfriend and lover. You may not know about the other girls, sir, but none of them are pretty when you look at their faces, but Reg sees them as lovely. That tells you a lot about him.”

“Really? That is interesting. Let me call their records up on my computer.” He tapped a few keys to bring up the student database, then asked, “Names, please?”

Reg said “Erika Platts; Freda Dangerfield; Francis LeBrun, and of course Prudence Gower.”

The dean pulled up each record in turn. These included a head and shoulder photograph, which he examined one by one. He checked their class results, mumbled to himself, then asked Reg, “Mr Robertson, these girls have recorded improvements in all their classes recently. Do you have any explanation to offer for that observation?”

“Only that I have been tutoring them over the last month or two, while they have been teaching me social skills that I lacked.”

“So it is down to tutoring, not young love?”

“I would say so, sir. Love does not assist educational attainment. Application and an ability to understand makes a great deal of difference. I have tried to make them see the basics of what the lecturers are saying. Most students spend too much time looking at detail and fail to see the point of the lecture. It is like not seeing the wood for the trees.”

“Interesting idea. Have you plans to become a teacher, Mr Robertson?”

“Actually, I don’t have any plans formulated at all, sir, other than getting my degree. I haven’t considered my future, until now. The girls are having some influence on rectifying that defect, sir.”

“Excellent, excellent.” He cast his eyes over the pair in front of him. “Having examined the facts, I can see where these girls are coming from. Their options for the future must have been fairly limited, I would say. So why you, young man? Why you?”

Reg sat up straighter, and gripped Prudence’s hand. “Sir, you malign the girls. These young ladies rescued me from a straitjacket existence that I wrapped myself inside. I was a loner with no social skills to speak of, deliberately cutting myself off from society, and sheltering within a cocoon of education.

They saw my problem as something they could devote themselves to, and they have done that with great skill, perseverance, and patience. I have been the beneficiary of their energy, their enthusiasm, and later their love. I cannot envisage my life without them, so I am happy to commit to them in this ceremony.”

The Dean now focused on Prudence. “Can you speak for the girls, Miss Gower?”

“I can, sir. I was the latecomer to the group. Frances formed it as a two-way study group, and Reg proved an excellent explainer of almost every subject that we are studying. He is widely read through his solitary life, and he uses this knowledge to help us understand what we are studying. The results appear in our class results. Being in love with Reg has had no adverse effects on us, sir.”

“I can see that. My only concern is whether you four girls can get along; with all of you committed to Mr Robertson. That is a big ask, Miss Gower.”

“We are aware of the risks, sir. We have discussed them in depth. Frances, Erika and Freda have been best friends for a while, and I believe I have been able to include myself within their sphere of friendship. We think we can all be wives to Reg; it is a prospect we all look forward to. Reg has shown that looks aren’t everything, and we have shown him that other people are not all bad.”

“Children?” The Dean wanted to know.

“Not until we have achieved our degrees, sir. Reg would want it no other way.”

Reg interposed, “That is so, sir.”

The Dean concluded the meeting, “Send me an invitation to the ceremony. See my secretary about it as you leave. Thank you for coming.”

Later, he phoned the chaplain, and said, “I have interviewed the man and one of his ladies. All I can report back to you is, that I find no fault in this man.”

The chaplain was no fool. She recognised that these were words from the Bible, where Pontius Pilate reported to the Jewish leaders on his examination of Jesus. She knew that the Dean was washing his hands of the accusation she had raised.

She told him, “I am grateful to you for you looking into the matter, Dean. We have done what was needed; we can do no more.”

This was code for “I am covered as well as you, should there be any comeback.”

The Dean smiled to himself.

“Farewell, Chaplain.”

Surprisingly, all the parents replied saying that they would try to be there. There were a few questions about what the commitment ceremony actually meant. The girls thought they were completely clear in the original invite, but happily phoned the parent concerned to clarify it. They emphasised being wives to Reg for life, even although the law did not allow such recognition.

Despite trying to keep everything low key, Frances got a real surprise when she was collared one day as she left her final class of the day.

“Frances?” She turned to see who was speaking, and found the Blackstone identical twins in front of her. She had seen them around in some of her classes.

“Yes? What can I do for you girls?”

“Is it true that you and a couple of other girls are marrying Reg Robertson next week?”

“Girls, the answer is yes and the answer is no. Technically and legally speaking, only one of us can legally marry Reg, so we are not doing that. What we are embarking on is a commitment ceremony, where we commit ourselves for life as a family. It is in effect a marriage, but has no legal validity. We will all insist on being described as Mrs Robertson from that day on, and we will act as wives from that day. That is what we are publicly committing ourselves to.

Does that answer your question?”

“Yes. So if we find one boy or man that is in love with us both, we could have a commitment ceremony to be his wives together?”

“Yes, BUT, you have to be sure that you all are certain that every last one of you, is seriously determined to make it work. It is just as final as a wedding ceremony, but because it has no legal validity, you have to be sure that your man is in it for the long run, and not as a short-term thing to get his jollies for a while.

I would recommend that you get him to sign a cohabitation agreement, signing you as his joint heirs should he die suddenly, and have him acknowledging himself as the father of any children you have together. You need this as a legal document tying his finances to you, to stop him getting cold feet and deserting you in a year’s time. Most men are not terribly reliable, if you go by the divorce rates.”

One of the twins said, “What if he won’t sign such a document?”

“Then that is proof that he is not committing himself wholeheartedly. Drop him at that point, before you go any further. You girls have the looks to attract plenty of men, unlike me.”

“You managed it, Frances.”

“Only because Reg is highly unusual. I doubt if there are many like him in the whole UK, so finding another is a tall order. I will stick with the unique and wonderful man I have.”

“You are okay with sharing him? Presumably you are, as you are committing to him.”

“Yes. The others are my best friends, including Prudence, who joined us late. I know I can rely on them to be close friends for ever. After all, at times we might be in bed together with Reg; not all of us at once, but perhaps two of us with Reg at the same time. You have to be able to live with that, before you start.”

“We were thinking about that, Frances. Being identical twins, our man may not know which twin he is with, but if we teamed him together, he would know it. N either of us wants to get pregnant, though.”

“All of us girls have implants to prevent pregnancy, and Reg goes along with that. We want to gain our degrees, and perhaps get a professional job, before starting on children. You should do the same. It also gets you a couple more years to settle as a family and become sure of your future together.

Do you actually have a guy in mind?”

“No-one definite, yet, Frances. We have both been dating fellas at the university, but we are getting to the opinion that we would prefer not to have to split up when we marry. Your solution might suit us, if we can find a man who is comfortable with it.”

Frances laughed. “Most guys would be comfortable with bedding twins. It is whether a man could be depended on for many years ahead; that is a tougher proposition. I wish you girls luck. You can come along to our ceremony if you want, or we can give you a copy of our commitment promises to adapt according to your own needs.”

“So your Reg has signed a cohabitation agreement?”

“Actually, no. We didn’t think we needed one, with Reg. Perhaps we should, though, in case he drops dead when we have five or six kids, and so less chance of work. Yes, I’ll speak to him about it tonight.”

“Frances! There you are.” Another girl came running up. It was Freda. “We were wondering what had happened to you, as you are the one with the car.”

Frances turned back and apologised to the twins. “Sorry, girls; got to rush. I am the chauffeur for my mob. They can’t do without me, it seems. Bye for now. Keep in touch!”

As Freda and she hurried to reach the car park, Frances said, “Your Dad is a lawyer, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. Always busy, it seems. Why?”

“Do you think he could run up a cohabitation agreement for us?”

“You mean, for the five of us?”

“Exactly. It would be a precautionary measure, in case Reg drops dead in a few years and we otherwise would have no access to his assets at that time.”

“Oh, I see what you mean. I can ask him, certainly.”

As they got to the car park, Reg was standing with Prudence and Erika, looking slightly concerned. His face lit up as the other two appeared, and he welcomed them with a kiss each.

Frances hurried to get the car out of the by now almost empty car park, and they were soon on their way home. Frances waited until they were in the house before broaching her idea with Reg.

“My darling, I was talking to a set of twins who want to consider doing what we are doing, and I told them they should get a cohabitation agreement drawn up in advance, and then realised we haven’t done that, ourselves, as we didn’t think we needed one. Now I think we were wrong, for if you were to be knocked down and killed in an accident, none of us would have access to any assets you had. We should draft one out and get it signed before we begin our lives as an official family.”

“I get your drift, Frances. I agree. How do we go about it?”

“Freda’s father is a lawyer. We can maybe get him to draft it out, for us to cast our eyes over. Freda thinks she can get her father to do that job. Fine with you?”

“Certainly. I want my wives to be as protected as possible, as you know.”

Prudence put in, “Is there anything else we have neglected to consider, folks?”

Freda brought up a small point. “At weddings, it is customary to give a small gift to the officiant, in thanks for his services. If Tom is acting in that capacity, shouldn’t we give him something of that sort?”

Reg nodded. “Good point, Freda. Any ideas, folks?”

Blank looks were the response. Reg asked, “Does anyone know what he does, apart from martial arts?”

“Wait a minute,” said Frances. “I was telling him about Prudence being afflicted by a migraine, and he mentioned having had one or two in the past.”

Reg was puzzled at this remark. “So? What are you getting at, Frances?”

“Sun blockers. These are wrap-around dark glasses to cut down sunlight, if you are liable to get a migraine. We could buy him a pair, in a holder, that he could keep in his car as a protection. He might like to have that available.”

“That sounds a good suggestion, Frances,” said Erika. “I say, go for it.”

Reg suddenly said, “I just remembered. We have to invite the Dean to the ceremony. I asked him at my interview, and he decided he would accept if invited. I have his card from his secretary ... I have it somewhere, I am sure.” He fished in his pockets, and eventually pulled it out. “Can someone have an invitation handed in to his office?”