Chapter 6: Jennifer’s Secret

December 28, 1984, Indianapolis, Indiana

We parked the car, and I went to the hospital while the others went back to the hotel. It was past visiting hours, so even though Ed could go in, he decided to stay with my sister. I showed my license to the guard and went up to Bethany's room. Her dad was there with her, and she was asleep.

"How was her day?" I asked.

"Uncomfortable, I suppose is the right way to put it."

"I believe it," I said. "Anything new from the doctors?"

"Not really. I'm fairly certain she's been poked and prodded by half the doctors in Indianapolis at this point. After her surgery on Monday, we'll have a good idea as to when she can come home. She's been asleep most of the day. She said to wake her when you got here."

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"She insisted."

I went over to the side of the bed.

"Hi, Sweetheart," I said quietly, close to her ear.

Bethany stirred a bit, so I tried again.

"Bethany, it's Steve."

Her eyes slowly opened, and she blinked a few times.

"Hi," she whispered.

"How are you?" I asked.

"Everything hurts. But I told them to reduce the pain killers because I want to be able to think."

"As long as you're able to sleep, Sweetheart."

"I am. Do you know what happened on Christmas morning?"

"Your heart stopped," I said.

"I saw Birgit. And your baby. The one you were supposed to have with Becky."

"What?!" I gasped. "How?"

"I don't know. She said I should come back because you needed me. She said I should help you."

"Bethany, what are you talking about?" I asked.

"I saw her Steve. I saw Birgit."

"I don't even know what to say about that," I replied in disbelief.

"She told me to come back to you. So I did. I had a choice, and I came back to you."

"I love you, Sweetheart, and whatever happened, I'm glad you came back."

She smiled with a weak nod.

"How's Jennifer?" she asked.

"She'll come see you tomorrow. I think I'll wait until you see her to try to get to the bottom of what happened with Josie."

"Remember what I said, she's brittle. One push is going to cause her to shatter. You need to be ready to pick up the pieces."

"I know," I sighed, feeling her comforting squeeze on my hand. She! Comforting me!

I smiled and turned to her again. "I talked to your professor. He said to call him after the first of the year to work things out. I think he might come see you, too."

"Thanks, I appreciate that," she said with another light squeeze. "I'm tired and need to go back to sleep. See you in the morning?"

"Of course, Sweetheart!" I kissed her, and she closed her eyes and was asleep almost instantly.

"I'm going to get some sleep," I said to her dad. "Remember, I'm staying with her tomorrow evening so you and your wife can go out!"

Harry smiled, "Yes, I remember. Thanks, Steve."

"You're welcome. See you in the morning."

I headed back to the hotel and went to Stephanie's room and knocked on the door. She let me in.

"Hey. Tomorrow evening, I'm going to sit with Bethany so her parents can go out. Can you guys manage without me?"

"We'll be fine," she said.

"OK. Good night, Squirt. Good night, Jennifer. See you both for breakfast at 8:00am."

Stephanie hugged me but Jennifer didn't get up, so I just turned and left to go back to my room and get some sleep. Before I turned in, I called my dad to let him know that everything was fine with the car and that Bethany was doing as well as could be expected. He said Stephanie had called him to arrange to be picked up on Sunday and had filled him in on the Krajicks' plans.

"You can borrow the Lincoln when you're in town. I'm not sure how Mr. Krajick plans to get you to and from the airport, but I'll talk with him once Bethany is released and we'll work it out."

"Thanks, Dad. For everything. I guess that I'll see you Sunday."

"You're welcome, Son. See you Sunday."

I hung up, arranged for a wake-up call, and then climbed into bed and quickly fell asleep.

December 29, Indianapolis, Indiana

I managed a good night's sleep, and I realized that I must have been tired because I didn't wake early as I usually did. I took a leisurely shower, dressed, and met Jennifer, Stephanie, and Ed for breakfast. After we ate, we walked over to the hospital and went upstairs. Visiting hours hadn't started, so Jennifer and Stephanie sat in the lounge while Ed and I went to say good morning to Bethany.

"Hi," she said when we walked in.

"How are you this morning?" I asked, giving her a careful kiss.

"About the same. I just finished breakfast. I'm not looking forward to the surgery on Monday."

"Have you talked to Melanie? She went through it."

"No. She called, but I was asleep. I guess she and Pete are coming to visit at some point today or tomorrow."

"I'd think that you'll see Kurt and Kathy and maybe some others today or tomorrow as well. My sister has been calling to give them updates and they've spread the word. Can I do anything for you?"

"Climb in this bed and cuddle me," she sighed.

"I don't think that's going to work, Sweetheart. Not with all the wires and tubes, not to mention you've had three major surgeries."

She smiled, a bit uncomfortably, and sighed. "Are you talking to Jennifer today?"

"Yes. Let me go get her. If I just walk her past the nurses' station, I doubt anyone says anything."

I went down the hall to get Jennifer and walked her back to Bethany's room.

"Hey," Bethany said, weakly.

"Hi," Jennifer said, walking over to the bed.

"Thanks for coming to see me," Bethany said.

"How do you feel?"

"Like shit. What do you expect?" Bethany asked, forcing a smile.

Bethany's dad chuckled. He was quite tolerant of Bethany's swearing and teasing, unlike her mom, who seemed more uptight than usual. I suspected that had to do with the situation more than anything, because I hadn't seen that behavior before. It had been her dad who had been very protective when we were in High School.

"I can imagine! When do you think they'll let you out?"

"In a week or so, I guess. There haven't been any complications since the surgery to fix my diaphragm and ribs and I have one more surgery — on my arm. Then I start rehab."

"What about school?" Jennifer asked.

"I might be able to graduate. Steve called yesterday to let my professor know about the accident. I need to talk to him and the administration in January."

She closed her eyes, and I put my hand on Jennifer's arm.

"She sleeps a lot," I said. "We can come back later."

We walked out of the room and went to find Stephanie and Ed. I told them that Jennifer and I were going to take a walk and talk, and that we'd meet them for lunch around noon. I took Jennifer's hand and led her to the elevator and we rode down, and then walked outside.

"It's time to talk," I said.

"What's there to talk about? Josie and I broke up. End of story."

"Bullshit!" I retorted. "You would never let me get away with an answer like that!"

"I don't want to talk about it," she said.

"Too bad," I said insistently. "We need to talk. Now, tell me what happened with you and Josie?"

"We had a fight," she said, and started sobbing.

"Maybe we should we go someplace more private," I suggested. "Is it OK to go to my room?"

She nodded. I led her back to the hotel, and we went up to my room. I put the 'Do Not Disturb' sign out and then we sat in chairs by the small table.

"What was the fight about?" I asked gently.

"You. We had a fight about you," she sobbed.

"Me? I don't understand," I said. "Everything was great from the start until the last time I talked to you before school was out! What happened? Why would Josie suddenly have a problem with me?"

Jennifer was silent. She sobbed quietly.

"Jen, talk to me!" I said. "What was Josie's problem with me?"

She continued sobbing quietly.

"Damn it, Jennifer, what was her fucking problem?" I said sharply.

"It wasn't her!" she screamed. "It was me! It was me!" she wailed, collapsing back in the chair, her entire body heaving as she sobbed uncontrollably.

I was stunned and rocked back in my chair. Jennifer and I had made tremendous progress and now, suddenly, something had gone disastrously wrong. And I had no clue what it was!

"Jennifer," I said softly, once I'd regained my composure.

She covered her face with her hands and continued sobbing. I thought about going over and putting my arm around her, but if I was the problem, that might make things worse.

"Jen, please talk to me," I said.

She didn't respond, so I got up and got some tissues from the bathroom and set them on the table by her.

"Jen, please?" I said, almost begging now.

She lowered her hands, and I saw utter despair on her face. Bethany had been right. Now I just had to find out what it was so that I could help her. If I could, that is. She picked up one of the tissues and blew her nose, and took another one and dabbed her eyes and blew her nose again.

"Tell me what happened with Josie," I said gently.

"We had a fight," she said, sniffling. "And she went home early."

"That much I know. And you said the fight was about me. And that it wasn't Josie who was the problem. If you don't tell me, we can't fix it."

"I don't think we can fix it," she said, sobbing softly.

"We've been through so much at this point and we've solved so many problems. There's nothing you can say to me that we can't work through. Look how far we've come! We planned a future together based on mutual compromises. We agreed to have a baby together."

"I can't," she sobbed.

"Can't what?" I asked. "Have a baby? Why?"

"I can't be with you that way," she whispered, and put her face in her hands again.

"And Josie broke up with you over that?" I asked.

She lowered her hands, "Sort of. I couldn't tell her why and she got angry."

"Tell me why, Jennifer."

"I can't," she sobbed.

"You can't because you don't know or because you don't want to?" I asked gently.

"I just can't," she said.

"What can I do for you?"

"Just be my friend."

"I've been your friend for a long, long time. I would hope you could tell me anything, and that we could work through it together. Could you talk to my sister?"

"No. I can't talk to anybody."

"Yes, you can. Me, Stephanie, Bethany probably in a few weeks, your counselor. You need to tell somebody."

"No," she said with an air of finality.

If she wouldn't talk to me, there wasn't anything I could do. I'd thought about calling Josie, but if Jennifer was telling the truth, I didn't think Josie would have any insights to share. Perhaps giving Jennifer some time would make a difference.

"Are you still going to come to Chicago?" I asked.

"Yes. I really do want that job at Nuvatec. Will you still let me live in the house?"

"Of course. I want to help you, Jennifer, but you need to let me help you."

"Just let it go, please."

"How? We've gone from having a kid together to a place I don't understand. I can't just let that go without some kind of explanation. I'll give you some time, Jennifer, but eventually, we have to talk about this."

She shook her head. I decided to give up for the moment, but only for the moment. I was going to enlist my sister and, if they came today, Melanie and Kathy. I really wanted Bethany's help, but there was just no way that was going to happen, and I wasn't even going to discuss this with Bethany at this point.

"Fine," I said. "For now. Let's go see what Ed and Stephanie are doing. I want to hang out at the hospital. Some of our friends might come see Bethany, and if they do, I want to see them. Kathy and Kurt and Melanie and Pete are supposed to be here at some point, and there may be others."

"Sure," she said. "I want to take a shower."

"Do you have a key to your room?" I asked.

"Yes. Just wait here and I'll be back soon."

I sighed and nodded. She got up and left the room. I grabbed my address book from my bag, looked up Josie's number, and dialed it. A man answered and called Josie to the phone.

"Hi. It's Steve."

"Is Jenny with you?" she asked.

"She was. She just went to take a shower. Can you shed any light on what's going on?"

"I don't think so. I was hoping that you could. Did something happen between you two?"

"Not that I know of! I have no clue other than she says she can't be with me and have a baby with me. Do you have any idea what that's about?"

"Not really. We were at her parents' house talking about the future and I mentioned the baby and she started crying and said that wasn't going to happen. I tried to get her to tell me what was going on, but she clammed up and just refused to talk to me. Eventually, I couldn't handle it and I told her if she didn't want to talk to me, then I was going to go home. That didn't do anything except upset her even further. She withdrew even more, so I called and changed my flight and came home."

"Wait!" I protested. "You didn't break up with her?"

"No! I tried to call her, but she wouldn't talk to me at all. I tried to call you but I just got your infernal answering machine and I didn't leave a message. Where are you?"

"Oh hell! You don't know what happened. My friend Bethany, my best friend in the world, almost died in a horrible accident when she was driving home. I'm in Indianapolis. Jen flew here from Chicago."

"Oh my gosh! How's your friend?"

"In bad shape, but recovering. She needs another surgery and a lot of rehab, but it looks like she'll be OK in the long run."

"I'm glad to hear that. Did Jenny say that we broke up?"

"Yes. She said you guys had a fight and broke up and it was because she couldn't be with me."

Josie sighed, "I only left because she wouldn't talk to me. I hoped she'd tell you and we could work it out."

"She won't," I said.

"This is nuts!" Josie exclaimed. "I love her. You love her. She loves us. What the heck could the problem be?"

"I have no clue," I sighed. "And it sounds as if you don't, either. I'm going to try to enlist my sister and a couple of friends to talk to her. I don't know how much success I'm going to have, but I'm sure going to try."

"I could probably come down to Indianapolis if you think it would help," Josie said.

"I have no fucking clue what's going to help," I said, exasperated. "Sorry, I'm just on edge. I promise to call you as soon as I know something."

"Thanks, Steve. I hope you have some success. I really do love her."

"Me too," I said.

We said our goodbyes and hung up. I knew these calls were costing a small fortune, but with everything that had happened, I simply didn't care. I called Tatyana and filled her in on Bethany and told her my plans.

"This is OK. I just wish to be with you, so it does not matter if it is in Indianapolis or Chicago. Shall I change my flight?"

"No. Jennifer will be here until Wednesday. My plan is to come to Chicago on Tuesday to meet your flight, and then come back to Indianapolis on Wednesday after Jennifer leaves."