Chapter 65: A Little Help From My Friends

August, 1985, Chicago, Illinois

Bethany and Kathy finally came back to the house around 3:30pm. Kathy looked at me and her eyes told me that we needed to talk. I nodded my agreement and wondered how I could pull off the conversation without Bethany noticing. That problem solved itself when Bethany announced about 4:30pm that she was going out with Andrew and wouldn't join us for dinner. After Bethany left, I asked Kathy to help me prepare dinner, and she agreed.

"So?" I asked as I got the ingredients from the fridge and the pantry.

"She swears she's in love with him."

"But you don't believe her?" I asked.

"Do you remember talking to me about how Birgit was a fantasy?"

"How could I forget?" I asked.

"And we talked about how you and I simply missed our chance because we were afraid?"

"Again, how could I forget?"

"That's Bethany. Andrew is a fantasy. And Bethany is scared."

"OK," I replied, confused by what Kathy had just said. "Maybe I'm dense. Please explain."

"I don't think she's thinking clearly. Andrew is like Pete, only even more conservative. He comes from Grand Rapids and he's Dutch Reformed, though he hasn't been to church since he came to Chicago. Honestly, from the way she describes him, Andrew makes Pete look like a libertine. I'm afraid he'll never fit in."

"Pete has always been a bit uncomfortable with my choices," I replied. "but he's had a long time to get used to the craziness, starting back in High School. He also knew how close Melanie and I were, and that she'd never give up our friendship. So he adapted. Are you saying you don't think that Andrew can adapt?"

"I don't know," Kathy said. "My concern is that he can't and Bethany isn't taking that into account. She sees the fantasy — a devoted husband, two or three kids, a house with a white picket fence, a dog, a cat, and a parakeet — coming to fruition with Andrew. She's letting that fantasy override her otherwise good judgment."

"So, in the end, she couldn't accept a group marriage. I wondered if that was it."

"That's just it — she had accepted it," Kathy said. "She and I talked a lot about it. I'll tell you something now that I would never have told you before. I asked her, hypothetically, if I decided to leave Kurt, whether she and I could be together with you. We discussed it — a lot. She was more than willing. And she was fine with Kara in that same role."

"Seriously?" I asked, shocked. "You seriously thought about that?"

"Yes, but you kept pushing me back to Kurt. And," she sighed, "you were absolutely right to do so; there is no question about it. I was crazy to think that a group marriage was a good fit for me. I need the relationship I have now. I love Kurt and things are perfect. But, what a fantasy!"

She winked, smiled, and licked her lips to reinforce the image which she knew for certain had formed in my mind. Of all the crazy fantasies I'd ever had, a lifetime of threesomes with Bethany and Kathy was the craziest, and the one I most would want fulfilled.

I smiled and said, "I am very fortunate to have lived that fantasy at Prom as well on a few other occasions! I hope you didn't say anything to Kurt about your conversations with Bethany!"

"No," Kathy said, "I could never tell him that. He does know that Bethany and I were with you together. He's jealous!"

"I'm sure he is," I chuckled, but then became serious, "and I'm jealous of him. He has you all to himself. He's a lucky, lucky man. I also want to kill him for making you shave, but we're getting off track."

Kathy laughed.

"No, actually, we aren't," she said. "It's all part of the picture. Andrew offered Bethany the fantasy that she's had since she and I first talked about getting married in fifth grade. The problem is, as I see it, that she hasn't updated her fantasy to take into account her reality. She's been reclusive because she knows nobody approves of what she's done, and, I think, she's afraid of the future."

"As smart as she is, why wouldn't she think this through?" I wondered aloud. "She's not the same girl she was two years ago, let alone at age fifteen or age nine! She and I talked about that fantasy a couple of years ago, and she acknowledged that none of us were likely to have an idyllic life. Now it seems that she's trying for one."

"She is," Kathy agreed. "She swore to me that she loves him and that he loves her, and I don't doubt that. But I don't think she's going to be happy in the long run. Maybe I'll be wrong, and Andrew will fit in here, but I don't think so. Anala and Prajesh only come here occasionally because their lifestyle and yours clash mightily. They like you, but you live in a completely different world. That's what I think Bethany is setting up. And that's what I think she fears, though I'm not sure she'd admit that, or if she even consciously knows it. Usually she's a paragon of clear thought. She's not thinking clearly now."

"So, what do you propose to do?" I asked.

We had all the ingredients prepared, so I heated the wok to begin stir-frying the chicken.

"Nothing," Kathy said. "Which is what you should do. The more any of us pushes, the more she's going to cling tightly to Andrew."

"I'm going to ask Jessica to marry me on Friday," I said.

"And that will ensure that Bethany marries Andrew. She'll have to."

"You can't put that on me!" I protested. "She's making her own decisions."

Kathy put her hand on my arm, "Relax. I wasn't blaming you or saying that you were responsible, just what was going to happen. She'll have to do it to prove that she made the right choice. And she'll do it before you do."

"Seriously? They're both in grad school. She doesn't work. He's a library assistant. How is that going to work out? They can't live here, because there isn't room. And even if there was, from what you're saying, Andrew wouldn't want to. It's not practical!"

"What about you and Jessica? She's going to live in another city, for crying out loud!"

"But I have significant savings and an income with a big upside potential, not to mention owning the house with my dad. Kara has enough money from her grandparents to pay for her Master's and enough money for rent, which she'll contribute to the family budget, if you will. Jess won't make any money until she becomes an Intern, and then she won't make a lot. She's borrowing money for med school, but tuition is reasonable. Her upside is huge, and much more of a sure thing than mine, so money will work out fine.

"As for living apart, yes, that will be a challenge, but I look at what happened with Jamie and Jackie, and Cindi and Chris, and Pete and Melanie. We'll make it work. Yes, Kara and I will have to go to Indianapolis most weekends, or Jess will have to come here, but as Jess pointed out, my schedule can be flexible. I can set up a computer in Jess' apartment and work from there if I need to. We can send the files back and forth by modem or I can take them on diskette. Penny would be ready to kill me, but we can make it work, especially during the school year when she's not working."

"So you have thought all of this through."

"What did you expect?" I asked with a slight smile. "That I was just going to jump into this blindly?"

Kathy smiled, "No, but we don't always think clearly about things we want. Or things we think we want. I'm afraid that Bethany won't plan the way you have and will jump into the pond headfirst without checking the depth of the water. You've taken time to consult your closest friends; Bethany hasn't, well, until you pushed her to do it. Mark my words, if you propose to Jessica, Bethany and Andrew will marry right away. She's boxed herself into that decision, possibly on purpose."

I shook my head, "There's nothing I can do about that. I have to talk to her, but that talk is really going to be me telling her my plans. If she wants to talk about Andrew, I will. But I can't bring it up, and I won't."

"No, you can't," Kathy said. "Will you answer a question for me, between you and me only?"

"What will I do if Bethany changes her mind?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Nothing," I said firmly.

"Nothing as in you won't change what you're doing, or nothing as in you won't propose to either of them?"

"Nothing as in, I won't change what I'm doing. This is the right thing for me to do. I'm convinced."

"Believe it or not, so am I," Kathy said. "And therein lies Bethany's biggest fear. That she'll lose you as a friend if she marries Andrew. She really was hurt badly when you told her that you wouldn't call her 'Sweetheart' again."

I sighed, "She made her bed, Kathy. And from what you and Bethany both say, Andrew isn't Kurt or Pete. That means not only no calling her 'Sweetheart' but no kisses, and no full-body hugs. And I'll bet you anything you care to wager, no more nudity in the sauna for her if I, or any other guy, is in there."

"I don't think she's contemplated all of that," Kathy said. "And that's why I think this is a disaster waiting to happen. Oh, she'll be fine at first, but at some point, all the things she's had to give up are going to weigh her down. It's like when you were dating Kara back in High School, and especially when you decided to be exclusive with her. Your little sister called Kara your 'ball and chain' for good reason."

I nodded, "And yet, Kara was good for me and helped me change."

"In the end, it worked out that way, but at first? You were not yourself and we all noticed. Kara's meltdown was the best thing that ever happened to both of you. Without that, you would be attending some conservative church and going stir-crazy because you made a grave miscalculation because you wanted to make your wife happy. But none of us could tell you that; not even your sister. That's why she used the 'ball and chain' metaphor."

"And you think Andrew is putting shackles on Bethany? Shackles she's going to rebel against in the future?"

"I do. It's not like Pete and Melanie. Melanie needed Pete to be firm with her, to rein her in. She, despite her wild streak in High School, wanted to be with one man and one man only. And she needed someone exactly like Pete. That's why she broke up with you. Even then, she somehow knew where you were going to land on the crazy spectrum! So she had her crazy fun and now she's much calmer. Sure, she still kisses you like she wants to throw you down on the floor and fuck your brains out, but she doesn't mean it."

"But you do!" I replied, as I finished cooking the chicken and added vegetables to the wok.

Kathy laughed, "You had your chance, Mister! I grew my hair back for you and offered. But you didn't take me up on it."

"I couldn't do that to Kurt," I said softly.

"Well, of course not! You're straight!" she teased.

"If you ever have a daughter, Mrs. Jaeger, I won't turn her down!"

"If we do, then when she's old enough to make her own decisions about THAT, we'll see if you might just finally meet your match! It'll be interesting to watch!" she giggled.

"So what do we do?" I asked.

"Go upstairs and fuck like bunny rabbits?" Kathy teased.

"I meant about Bethany, you little hussy!"

She kissed me on the cheek.

"Love her and support her," she said. "That's all we can do. She has to decide for herself what her future should be. She's already burned the one bridge that I thought couldn't be burned."

"You mean because I've decided on Jessica?"

"Yes. I honestly thought you and Bethany were soulmates. I'm pretty sure Bethany taking off your diamond says that you aren't."

"Oh, but we are," I said. "I know it. She knows it. But she chose friendship with me over marriage to me. The problem is, she miscalculated what that friendship will be like if she marries Andrew."

"I know I said I felt you were making the right decision, but are you simply letting Bethany walk away? Is your running to Jessica a bad reaction to Bethany's decision?"

"No, I'm not," I replied. "I know you had to ask that question, and I thought about it a lot. Did she tell you that I told her I was ready to get married over a month ago? She said she wasn't ready. And did she tell you I actually proposed, sincerely, on Saturday? She said 'no'."

"She told me. And she told me you tried Saturday night, but then you accepted what she wanted."

"She was determined to say 'yes' to Andrew, and I didn't see any value in prolonging the tension between us. This isn't a situation like Stephie where, when Red asked her out, I knew I needed to step aside. Those two were meant to be together from age two! He made a mistake in going with Rose when he should have been going with Stephie. But they were best friends, and too close to realize how much they loved each other. They were supposed to be each other's firsts, but Rose interfered."

"Wasn't Stephie dating someone?"

I laughed, "If you want to call it that. His name was Daryl, and he believed French kissing was reserved for marriage."

"No way!" Kathy laughed. "That's even more extreme than Kara's dad was!"

"But not her pastor. His daughter and his daughter's best friend were basically taught that kissing leads directly to sex, so you would only kiss your fiancé, and only chastely, until your wedding night. And dancing was right out!"

"You helped several of those kids, with Josh Richards being the most important one."

"Mary had a bit to do with that, too. Once she took him to bed, he was a new man."

"And I was a new woman once you took me to bed properly. And Kurt thanks you, by the way!"

"He's welcome. I'm sure you're keeping him more than satisfied, you little vixen!"

"Let's just say his horizons have been expanded!" she giggled.

"This is almost ready. How's the sauce?"

"Perfect. Do you want a taste?"

"Always!" I grinned. "Oh, you meant the sauce for the stir fry!"

I took the saucepan and poured the sauce that Kathy had prepared over the meat and vegetables, tossed them, and then turned off the heat. I turned, pulled Kathy into my arms and gave her a deep French kiss, savoring her very unique flavor.

"Yep," I said, breaking the kiss. "It tastes perfect!"

She laughed, "OK. Let's get the food on the table before this gets too far out of hand!"

I playfully grabbed her butt, "It's perfectly in hand!"

She playfully swatted my arm, and I turned and picked up the wok. Kathy scooped the rice from the pot and into a bowl, and we carried them into the dining room. Kathy went to call everyone to dinner and soon the table was full of friends and housemates.

"No beef products," I said to Prajesh.

He smiled, "No need to tell me, Steve. I trust you to respect our choices. Thank you."

I watched out of the corner of my eye as Anala prepared a plate for Prajesh and set it before him. She waited until he started eating before she served herself. It was like something out of the 1950s, only even more so. But they seemed very happy together, and I was the last person to interfere in someone else's life in that way. It wasn't for me any more than Larry's lifestyle seemed to be, but that didn't mean I shouldn't respect it. And that's where I had to come down with Bethany. I might not agree with her, but I had to respect and honor her choices.