Chapter 38: Aikido

March 15, 1994, Chicago, Illinois

“How was your first week?” I asked.

“Very interesting,” Stephanie answered. “Obviously, it’s very different from what I was doing at Arthur Andersen, though they offered me a manager’s position on the Enron account if I would stay. But I think this is better for me in the long run. It’s not the same business, obviously, but Samantha is mostly going to let me run things day to day, with her input and control, of course. Thanks for working this out with her.”

“She was complaining about needing a right-hand person, and I thought of you. Dad agreed. I do want to suggest that you stay until Samantha graduates. I know you wanted to be out in two years, but she needs you, and I’m asking you to do it for me.”

Stephanie frowned, paused for a moment, but nodded, sighing, “It makes sense. You promise?”

“I do. Dad is on board, though I haven’t talked to him about the three years versus two years yet.”

“Samantha is pretty cool. I can’t believe her dad started teaching her the business when she was eight!”

“Yes, but only so she could keep an eye on her husband, who was supposed to actually run things!”

“Her dad was a real scumbag, that’s for sure!”

“You do realize that there were several parents who could have called the cops on me, right?”

“But you treated the girls really, really well. And mostly you knew the parents wouldn’t come after you.”

“Mostly. But my rules don’t allow for that now, and for good reason. Not to mention the age gap is pretty serious now.”

“True. How are things with Jessica?”

“Pretty good. We’re making progress. How goes the wedding planning?”

“Fine. I know Ed talked to you about Mom and Dad.”

“He did. You need to invite them. I’m cool with excluding Jeff, and I’ll back you to the hilt on that one. But you need to let go of your anger at Mom.”

“I don’t know how you did that after everything she did!”

“Because, in the end, I value my relationship with Dad, and he loves her. But Squirt, I could easily have been him. If it weren’t for Kara, I’d have simply caved to every demand Jessica had, and let her run roughshod over me. Just like the situation at home.”

“No way, big brother! Never!”

“Except that’s exactly what I was doing! Elyse kicked my butt a few times about it, and so did Jennifer. And eventually, Kara put her foot down. You know me. I love Jess and I’d have done anything to get her back.”

“Shit,” she sighed. “I never thought about it that way.”

“We do some crazy things for the people we love. And we go through hell for them. Ask Ed.”

“I don’t know that I’d be here without Ed,” she sighed. “It was that bad. When I lost you, I felt as if I had lost everything.”

I nodded, “I’m very glad you found a guy strong enough to help you through it. And you didn’t lose me, Squirt.”

“I don’t think you really ever understood what I meant when I said we were made for each other. Two halves of the same whole. It was as if an entire part of me was cut away.”

“I am sorry,” I said. “I love you as much as I ever have.”

She nodded, “I know. But it wasn’t enough. But we shouldn’t be talking about this. We need to move forward, and find a way to be brother and sister.”

“I’ll do anything in my power to help make that happen,” I said.

“Thanks.”

“How’s the baby?”

“Other than missing my period, you wouldn’t know I was pregnant! But Doctor Robertson says everything checks out with my health. I’ll have an ultrasound next month. And I’ll start showing a bit soon enough.”

“How are Ed’s parents handling the news?” I asked.

“His dad took it all in stride. His mom is her usual self. Did you know she hates Tom?”

“Hates Tom? What the fuck? He takes good care of Bethany and Nicholas, he’s nice, good looking, and would give you the shirt off his back!”

“Don’t ask me,” Stephanie sighed. “Ed doesn’t get it either. He really likes Tom. I think Mrs. Krajick still isn’t over Bethany breaking things off with you.”

“Bethany and I tried so many times and we always blew it. We could be best friends and lovers, but something about being a couple just didn’t work. Maybe if I’d been different, it could have worked, but if I’d been different, then we might never have gotten together in the first place! Shit! That’s exactly why I don’t like to play that stupid ‘What if?’ game. I’ll tie myself in knots trying to figure out what went wrong and why, and I’m not sure I could. Bethany has tried and she has no clue, either.”

“I think it has to do with the original basis for your relationship. You both tried so hard to keep it to fulfilling a request, but you couldn’t. And that struggle is probably what messed you up.”

“Bethany and I have talked about that, and of all the things we ever came upon, that explanation probably makes the most sense.”

“Her mom isn’t happy about the baby, either.”

“Jesus!” I sighed. “Maybe Bethany’s mom and our mom can form their own ‘Society for the prevention of your children being happy’ chapter.”

“Ed just ignores her like you do Mom.”

“Ed’s a good man, Squirt. I’m happy you’re with him.”

“I do have one major regret.”

“What’s that?”

“I never really had a chance to tell Jorge how truly sorry I was and how much I appreciated everything he tried to do for me.”

I smiled, “He knew. We talked about it. He loved you, but he also knew he wasn’t right for you. He and Trish would have made a perfect couple.”

“I still can’t believe he’s gone.”

“I miss him, too,” I said.

March 16, 1994, Chicago, Illinois

“That’s the last of them!” Jessica said when she came into the kitchen on Wednesday morning.

“Stephie?”

“Yes. She’s miserable. Kara is giving her a baking soda bath right now.”

“At least the three oldest are back in school. That makes things a bit easier.”

“Kara was thinking of staying home because of Ashley, Albert, and Stephie. Michael isn’t complaining, and he has a really mild case.”

“I think I’ll offer to stay home. Elyse can cover for me at the office, and I don’t have anything pressing. Kara is in the middle of her research and really needs every minute she can get.”

I went upstairs to the girls’ room where Kara was bathing a very cranky Stephie.

“Hi Little Bunny Rabbit,” I said.

“I itch!” she whined.

“I know. Mommy is helping. Does the bath feel good?”

“Yes. Why did Jesse have to make me sick?”

“He didn’t do it on purpose. This is something all little kids get. Kara, I’ll stay home with the three little ones today. I know you have a lot of research work that really can’t wait. Not to mention your class and office hours.”

“Daddy cuddles?” Stephie asked, making puppy dog eyes at me.

“I think that settles it,” Kara said. “I think we need more calamine lotion. Could you run to Osco before I leave?”

“Sure. How are we fixed for baking soda and antihistamine?”

“I bought both of those on my way home yesterday afternoon. I think Amanda has everything else she needs, too.”

“OK,” I said. “I’ll let Elyse know I’m staying home, and then I’ll run to the store.”

When I returned from the store twenty-five minutes later, Amanda had arrived, and Jessica had made my breakfast, so I kissed my wives goodbye, ate my breakfast, and then went to comfort my daughter. She ended up having to share with Ashley, but neither of them was as possessive of my time as Birgit was. Once the kids had their lunch, we put them all down for naps, and Amanda and I ate lunch together.

“Those girls really love their time with their daddy,” Amanda observed.

“Usually they have to fight Birgit for cuddle time. She’s very possessive!”

“She says you cuddle really well!” Amanda said with a smile.

“So she says!”

We finished our lunches and I decided that because the kids were napping, I’d play Myst on my Mac. I’d bought it right before the accident, but hadn’t been able to play it while I was recovering, and hadn’t had much time since, and I’d used that little time to finally finish 7th Guest, one of the best puzzle games I’d ever played. I got to play Myst for about an hour before the girls woke up and once again needed my attention. We were cuddling in the sunroom when Kara came home.

“How are the kids?”

“Michael did a good job of distracting Albert, and the girls have been OK so long as I’ve cuddled them.”

“I know the feeling! Want me to take them so you can start on dinner?”

“Girls, is it OK if you go to Mommy so I can make dinner?”

“Yes,” they said reluctantly.

I got up, handed the girls to Kara, and went to make dinner.

March 17, 1994, Chicago, Illinois

“«Konnichiwa», Inao Mitsuko,” I said when I walked into Medici on Thursday, just before noon.

“«Konnichiwa», Sensei Steve!”

We were seated almost right away. Having been a regular for years, it let me ‘jump the queue’ when they were busy, as they were today. I was also grateful that we had one of the booths, and it was in the quietest part of the restaurant.

“How was your trip?” Mitsuko asked after we ordered our meal.

“Good. The kids came down with chickenpox while I was away, so there was a bit of excitement at home.”

“All at once?”

“No, fortunately. The three oldest, then, later, the four youngest.”

“Are they better now?”

“Getting there,” I replied. “Stephie is probably suffering the most, but she’ll be better by Sunday.”

“That must be terrible for your new nanny!” Mitsuko exclaimed.

“I stayed home yesterday to help care for the girls, and the three oldest were back in school, so it wasn’t too bad.”

“You stayed home? Not Professor Adams?”

“Dads can’t take care of sick kids?” I asked with a smile.

“Well, no; I mean yes, they can. My dad would never do that, though. He’s far too traditional.”

“Neither would my dad, though he seems to do better with the grandkids than he did with us.”

“I think my father will be the same way - a strict, conservative dad, but a doting grandfather.”

“Fortunately, my dad wasn’t too conservative, so I had quite a bit of freedom once I turned fifteen.”

“You should try living in a Japanese household!” Mitsuko declared, shaking her head.

“My friend Ailea, the granddaughter of Sensei Ichirou, told me all about it. I take it you weren’t allowed to date?”

“No. But I managed by going out with groups of friends. My sister will use the same trick! The key was not telling my parents if I liked a boy.”

“Did you date once you came to Chicago?”

“I went to a few parties with Crystal my first two quarters, but I didn’t like them. Too much drinking and the guys all only wanted one thing. I did go out a few times with a guy in my physics class, but after a few dates I decided he wasn’t right for me. He expected me to act completely American, and while mostly I do, there are times when I like to be Japanese. And he didn’t like fish or sushi!”

“That’s a red flag right there! I don’t think I’ve seen you eat anything but fish at lunch.”

“I did eat a hamburger at your house once, but I don’t do that very often. Beef is OK, but chicken is better, and fish is best.”

“I like seafood, but there isn’t much better than a good steak!”

“But you like sushi, right?”

“Yes.”

“Perhaps we could go someplace that serves sushi sometime?”

“There’s a place I know near the Loop, but I’m not sure if you’d have time to come downtown for lunch.”

“We could always have dinner, instead, though I suppose you like to eat with your family.”

“Yes, I do.”

“We could try on a Tuesday. I don’t have class in the afternoon, so I could take the L downtown.”

“That would work for me,” I said.

“Great!”

Our food arrived and we began eating. We ate quietly, for the most part, talking briefly about her classes and Aikido training. I thought she might use that part of the conversation to segue to the topic that was simmering below the surface, but she didn’t. I wondered if my question two weeks earlier had caused her to reconsider. Strangely, at least for me, I realized I wouldn’t be disappointed by that change of heart.

It wasn’t that I had a ‘take it or leave it’ blasé attitude towards it, but that for whatever reason, it didn’t feel ‘necessary’, if that was even the right word to use. Mitsuko and I were good, intimate friends, and if it stayed at that level, I would lose nothing. That wasn’t to say I didn’t want her, but as I’d said to Samantha many times, wanting didn’t mean you should. And that led me to ask myself what I would do if she DID make the request, and had been avoiding the topic because of her generally conservative nature.

Over the past sixteen years, I’d run into quite a few girls who’d had very strict parents and a very controlled home life, and to varying degrees, they’d all decided to explore life in ways their parents would never permit while they were living at home. My mom had the same attitude, but I’d managed to skirt it thanks to some help from other adults in my life, including the Spencers and probably most importantly, Andreas. Without that apartment, my opportunities would have been far more limited, and the chances of being caught, as I had been several times, much higher.

A few of the girls had gone completely off the deep end - Maria in St. Martin, Sandy van der Meer in Milford, and to a lesser extent, Pam when she’d been in Sweden and then her first year at UW. And then there was Papiya. Other girls had chafed under the control, but hadn’t gone crazy. Lena came to mind, as did Jodie and Michelle. What would happen with Ailea remained to be seen, but she didn’t strike me as someone who would go crazy any more than Mitsuko would. Or Jacqui or Fawn, for that matter. Both of them had quickly found steady boyfriends, and Fawn was getting married at the end of July.

The word that came to mind for girls like Lena, Jodie, and Michelle, and before them, Ruth, Jacqui, and Rosie, was exploration. They had feelings that had, for whatever reason, been suppressed, and I provided a safe way to engage in exploration. There was no doubt in my mind that was what was going on with Ailea, but her behavior indicated she was testing her flirting skills. Mitsuko, on the other hand, seemed to have reached the state where curiosity had overcome her natural conservatism. I’d seen that before as well, but my question to her, one I wouldn’t have worried too much about in the past, had given her pause. And that was a good thing.

When we finished eating, Mitsuko asked for tea - something she’d never done before. I ordered some as well, and waited to see what she would have to say. The waiter brought hot water and a selection of tea bags, and we each put a bag in our individual pots to steep.

“You haven’t asked me about the question you asked last time...” she said, leaving her words hanging, not quite a statement, not quite a question.