Chapter 51: Friends and Neighbors, Part I

August, 1983, Chicago, Illinois

In the morning, Anala and I ran as we had the previous time she'd visited, then showered together, carefully washing each other's bodies in an intimate but non-sexual way. After our shower, we went to the kitchen, and I made breakfast and we sat down to eat.

"May I make a suggestion?" Anala asked.

"Sure."

"Broaden your circle of friends. Other than me, all of you are white, nominally Christian, 20-year-old Americans. And you don't invite me to your Sunday gatherings."

"Do you want to be invited? I got the idea that you didn't."

"I don't. I much prefer having these conversations one-on-one. Have you ever had a friend that isn't a person of European extract? Who isn't at least nominally a Christian? Before me, that is."

"I suppose not. I mean, I was friends with the one black guy in my High School class. He's at the Naval Academy now."

She laughed, "Now I see why your views were so narrow in some ways. You're open-minded, but you haven't experienced truly radical points of view, except perhaps through me. IIT has a hugely diverse student body, but you seem to gravitate to people who are just like you."

"That makes sense, doesn't it?"

"Yes, it's normal, but it's not the way to grow and expand your mind. You've told me that your Russian friend has shown you a different set of values and points of view, just as I have. Look for people you like who don't fit the same stereotype."

"Well, I did meet one black guy a couple of months ago who'll be at IIT in the Fall."

"Wow. One black guy. I'm impressed," she said in a lilting voice.

"Sorry, that just came out wrong. I promise to try," I said.

"Good," she said with a nod and a smile.

When we finished eating, we cleaned up and then I took Anala home. At her door, we kissed softly, and I headed back home. I changed the sheets on my bed and put them and the sauna towels into the washer. I thought about what Anala had said and realized that she was right. The most interesting conversations that I had were with her and Tanya. I'd have to make an effort to find some others who might tolerate our group, but who weren't too much like us. That seemed a tall order.

Jackie was arriving the next day, so I unlocked the door to the room she was going to share with Cindi, got my cleaning supplies and swept, dusted, and washed the windows. When I was satisfied that it was clean, I locked the door and returned the key to the cabinet in the kitchen. I went back to my room and wrote out checks for the bills I had to pay, and decided to walk to the post office to mail them.

When I arrived back home, I realized that I didn't really have anything to do for the rest of the day. I went to my room and got my list of things I wanted to buy and reviewed it, and added a few items to it, one of which was a small stereo for the Indian room so that we could play music. There wasn't anything really pressing on the list, though some of the rooms were still quite empty. I realized that once the union deal was in place, I'd have a bit more to spend each month, as well as once everyone started paying rent.

I looked at the things I had written on the chalkboard and saw the note to call Carla. I still wasn't sure what to do about her, but she'd called twice and I needed to at least return her call. I picked up the receiver and dialed her number. She answered on the fourth ring.

"What took so long for you to return my call?" she asked after we greeted each other.

"I was in Georgia and then Ohio. My trip was a few days longer than I expected."

That wasn't totally accurate because I'd been home a few days, but I didn't need to tell Carla that.

"Can I see you again?" she asked.

If Stephie were in Chicago, I wouldn't have considered it, but Stephie wasn't in Chicago. I wasn't thrilled with the idea of spending the day alone, and given what I knew about Carla, I could probably spend time with her without it turning into a situation like with Candy, something I wasn't particularly interested in at the moment.

"Sure. What are you doing today?" I asked.

"Nothing, really. Just hanging out. How about you?"

"Same here. No plans. Did you have something in mind?"

"Lunch, maybe?" she said.

"There's a deli on 58th, not too far from your apartment. Let's meet there at 11:30am."

"That's cool! See you then!"

We hung up, and I went to move the laundry from the washer to the dryer. I had an hour to kill, so I grabbed my book and sat in the sunroom to read. I read for about forty minutes, then took a quick shower and dressed. I locked up the house and walked nine blocks south and then a couple of blocks east to the deli. Carla was waiting for me on the sidewalk.

She was dressed more conservatively than before, wearing jeans and a t-shirt. The sunglasses and ponytail still gave her the 'Melanie' look that I'd noticed the other day, but this girl was no Melanie. In fact, this girl was more sheltered than Stephie, though not as much so as Kara and her friends from Grace Church.

We went inside and ordered our sandwiches, and I refrained from making a joke out of the question the counterman asked her about six inches or a foot long when she ordered a sub. We took our sandwiches, chips, and drinks to a table on the sidewalk and sat down.

"How was your trip?" she asked. "Did you enjoy the race?"

I wasn't going to get into the weeds about my relationship challenges with Carla. It dawned on me that I hadn't told her about Stephie in the first place, because the issue had never come up, so I didn't really need to say anything.

"The race was fun. The guy I root for did OK, and I liked being with my friends. It's a heck of a drive, though, eleven hours one way. I stopped in Milford, my old hometown, on the way back, to see some friends as well."

"You know, I never asked you how many people live in the house with you?" she said, taking a bite of her sub sandwich.

"Six. Five of them go to IIT, the other one is at UofC."

"Six guys? That must be a heck of a party!"

I chuckled, "Six girls. None of my housemates are guys. When I lived in the two-bedroom apartment, my roommate was a girl."

"You live with SIX girls?" she said, shocked. "How does that even work?"

"Carla, you're jumping to conclusions again! The same as when you thought all my silly comments were seduction attempts. I have my own room. The girls have their own rooms, though two of them are sharing one of the bigger rooms. It's not what you were thinking."

"My dad would have a fit if I lived in a house with a guy, even with my own room!"

"I'm sure a lot of dads would. My mom doesn't like my living arrangements, but it's not up to her and I don't care what she thinks."

"Do you have a steady girlfriend? How does she deal with it?"

"No, I don't. The girls I've seen seriously over the past two years were OK with it. We broke up for reasons other than having a house full of women! Do you have a boyfriend?"

"No. We broke up when I moved to the city. I've met a few guys here, mostly college students, but nobody I'm interested in. Well, until you."

"And why are you interested in me?" I asked, opening my bag of chips and eating a few.

"You're different from most of the guys I knew in High School or at the community college. I mean, you own a house, for Pete's sake! You do have some strange views, but that's intriguing. You seem like a nice guy. You aren't Tom Selleck, but you look nice."

"Gee, thanks," I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Uh, I guess that came out wrong, didn't it?"

"It did. How would you feel if I said that you were no Charlene Tilton or Farrah Fawcett-Majors?"

"I'm not, but you're right. I shouldn't have said that," she said, looking down.

That more or less killed the conversation until we finished our lunch. We tossed our trash in the can by the door and I returned our trays to the counter. We began walking down 58th street towards Woodlawn.

"Sorry about that comment," she said, sounding chagrined. "It was really rude of me and I feel like I wrecked our lunch."

"Forgiven and forgotten," I said.

"Would you like to go to a movie? There's a new one out that takes place in Chicago that some of my friends saw last night."

"What movie?" I asked.

"It's called Risky Business and stars Tom Cruise as a rich kid from Glencoe or somewhere up that way. He gets in all kinds of trouble. My friends said it was really funny."

"Sure, why not? I'm free for the afternoon. Let's just take the El into the city and go to Water Tower Place," I said.

We walked to the Howard Line and made our way to the theatre, which was in the mall at Water Tower Place. We bought tickets for the next show and then wandered the mall until about ten minutes before the movie started, when we went back to the theatre. I handed over our tickets, and we found some seats.

I thoroughly enjoyed the movie. It was slapstick and farcical, but watching Joel trying to deal with 'Guido the killer pimp' was flat out hilarious. A major bonus for me were the sex scenes with Rebecca De Mornay, especially on the El. Those were some of the hottest scenes I'd seen in a movie, even though most things were implied, rather than shown. More interestingly, there had been one very good shot of a totally naked Rebecca De Mornay, who I felt was smoking hot. It didn't surprise me when Carla made a comment about the scene on the El.

"Don't get any ideas!" she whispered.

I just shook my head. The mixed signals I was getting from this girl were driving me nuts. I was pretty sure that her objections were really invitations, but I wasn't going to play that game with her. From what I'd seen, that would only lead to frustration when she put the brakes on because she was afraid or didn't want to go where she strongly implied she wanted to.

When we walked out of the theatre, I felt Carla's hand brush mine, but I wasn't having any of it. I just ignored it, shoved my hands in my pockets, and kept walking towards the steps that would take us down to the Michigan Avenue level so we could head back to the El. We talked about the movie, focusing on the sillier parts and avoiding the risqué part. She'd enjoyed the movie as much as I had. I mentioned that I wanted to get the soundtrack because I really liked the music by Tangerine Dream. I remembered that Randy, the character played by Nic Cage in Valley Girl, had worn a Tangerine Dream t-shirt during the montage set to my favorite song in that movie, I Melt With You.

We got off the El in Hyde Park and I walked Carla back towards her apartment. When we got to Woodlawn, she stopped and turned to face me.

"Don't you like me?" she asked.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"I tried to hold your hand after the movie and you wouldn't. Now you're just walking me home without even offering to take me to your place. Why?"

"Carla," I said gently. "Relax. I'm naturally conservative and cautious, and you're sending all kinds of mixed signals."

"Sitting naked in a sauna with girls is conservative and cautious?" she asked, her arms crossed.

"Perhaps not to you, but every single one of those girls makes it clear that she's OK with it. I don't push or pressure. That's just not me. The same goes for anything else, too. If I get mixed signals, I just let it go."

"Doesn't everyone give mixed signals? You're doing it!"

"Am I? How? By going on a date with you and not trying to force myself on you? By not begging you for kisses or stuff? That's not a mixed signal. That's maturity. Guys and girls can be friends, even go out, without having sex."

"Who said anything about sex? I'm talking about kissing and holding hands!"

"And even in that, you send mixed signals! Why did you feel the need to comment about the scene on the El between Joel and Lana? I didn't have my arm around you or anything like that. I wasn't even thinking about you that way!"

"Why? All guys think that way! That's what they want! That's what you want!"

"Carla!" I said sharply. "Stop it! Just stop! Have I done a single thing to make you think that's what I'm after? You keep putting up stop signs and I'm not even moving!"

"Why not? Is something wrong with me?"

I shook my head, "Let's try this a different way. If I asked you to come back to my place and put the moves on you to try to get you into bed, what would happen."

"I'd tell you to stop!" she said firmly.

"And don't you think I've figured that out? And if I've figured it out, why try? I'll just be frustrated and you'll just be angry. It's a game I'm not interested in playing. If that's the way you want things to go, then you're talking to the wrong guy. I'm not going to play that game."

She was quiet, so I took a few steps in the direction that would lead to her apartment. She followed after a moment and caught up with me.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I guess I was playing a game. But it's always worked before."

"Has it?" I asked. "Sure, the guys became interested, but didn't they get mad or upset when you slammed the brakes on after implying you wanted to do more than you actually were willing to do?"

"I guess," she said, then paused before changing her answer. "Yes."

"Then try a different approach. You seem like a nice person, though your relationship skills need some work. Instead of leading guys on, set the ground rules early on. But you have to do it nicely and you both have to agree on the limits. The limits can change, but if you let a guy think he's going to get you into bed, then stop him when he tries, he's going to be more than a little upset."

"Are you upset?" she asked.

"No. First off, I don't ever make assumptions about that. Even when I thought you understood that being in the sauna meant being completely naked, I made no assumptions. As I've said several times, I've been in the sauna naked with girls who I didn't have sex with, including my friend's mom. Second, I figured out pretty quickly that you were in over your head and didn't understand the situation in which you found yourself. And third, when you pushed back even against fairly innocent comments, I got the picture pretty fast.

"I've had a few bad experiences and I've learned from them. The last thing I need is another bad experience, and that's the last thing you need. So, no, I'm not upset, but I'm also not going to try anything. Not only that, but the situation is such that I'd be leery of moving forward at all. Honestly, I'm not sure it would be a good idea for us to even go out. We have wildly differing views on how to conduct ourselves and what we want from life."