Chapter 1

"Honey, I think that it's time that we have a talk," my wife blurted out of the blue, as we lay in our bed.

Wow ... I thought. Those are the cliché "kiss of death" words, of course. The "Dear John" intro words. In wifespeak, every guy knows that the missus means, "I'll tell you some bad news and then you can react." Never a good opening phrase, of course.

"Okay ... what about, precisely, dear? If I can still call you that, given your opening line," I remarked on her choice of words.

"Yes, I suppose that I could have picked a better beginning to what I have to say, but then I might not have gotten your attention in your fatigue. Now you're wide awake, aren't you, honey?" Lisa explained herself a bit.

"Fine, but you still haven't dropped your bombshell now, have you?" I remarked.

"So be it. Here it is. Honey ... I know all about you and Michelle. I think that you should know that she's pregnant at last, after trying for so long. I also know why you cheated. Yes, I know that you know about my affair. I'm as guilty as you are ... and you found that out. I know that it started out as revenge, but you couldn't bring yourself to stop, either.

"Look, baby ... I don't have any cause to blame you for what you did. It was wrong, at least according to how we were raised, but so was what I did. I'm sorry about my affair with James, too. I really am. I was unfaithful to you and you were loyal as they came up to that point. It must have been a real struggle at times, too, Dan," Lisa confessed, tears streaming down her face suddenly, much to my shock.

"How would you know?" I asked her, rather angry, but also touched by her sudden emotion.

"Baby, I could tell the moment that you became involved in your first affair, the one with Michelle, my own sister, because you don't have a poker face. You never did. Besides, it was my idea," Lisa smiled as she kissed me.

"What was your idea?" I demanded.

"The affair with Michelle, baby. You deserved a little strange on the side, for having had to deal with my unfaithful ass for those weeks, while you figured out your plan. Methodically, I must say. Admirable. You were going to have real fun at my expense. You like your dish freezing cold. You always were thorough. Just not good at hiding secrets. Too honest, too real ... too passionate. Maybe you could hide them from others, but not from me. I love that about you.

"Anyway, I hide secrets a little better because I've had to in the past. Life as a preacher's daughter is like that at times. I just felt horrible, especially once I knew that you knew. I thought that hiding it was merciful, but I realized that was a mistake in your case. You would never have cheated until you knew that I did, and then you were looking for a neat way to exact your revenge. You've always believed in retribution as a form of karmic justice. I knew that and it terrified me.

"You're such a Scorpio, babe. Under that cool surface, full of strong passions and towering rage. You can't help yourself. You gave your word and you kept it, but I broke mine. I didn't even mean to break it, but ... well, I'm sentimental, and James was my ex. I had a soft spot for him and he used it. Then he had me, the bastard. Blackmailed me into doing other things, just so that you wouldn't know.

"When I realized that you already knew, I knew what to do ... I couldn't just confess. I had to make it right and find the right woman as my penance, my atonement. If I picked the wrong woman, she'd steal you away from me and I couldn't bring myself to pay that price. I couldn't stand to lose you to her. I saw you with Deanna and some others in my head. I recalled how much she flirted with you over the years, Dan. I didn't matter that she was your cousin. She wanted you and would get you, if I didn't come up with an alternative and fast.

"I threw Michelle right at you and she was game. Hell, she was eager, but I had to pay her price. It was worth it, of course. It was totally worth it to keep you as my husband, to remain your wife," Lisa surprised me with a shy smile.

"What price?" I asked her, but already guessed.

"She always wanted you, apparently. Lifelong crush and all that jazz. If she seduced you, she wanted to share you with me permanently. She wanted to be your mistress, girlfriend, whatever. Breed with you, too. The more I thought about that, the more I thought it was a great idea. It shocked me at first, but I found myself in full agreement. There are times when you need more than one woman, I believe. I was wrong to ask you to 'forsake all others, ' especially since I failed to do so.

"Hell, it turned out that I needed more than one man, so fair was fair. Evidently, the whole monogamy thing wasn't working out for us. I don't know if that means that we're just too sinful for Heaven or what, but that's that. Yes, I'm done with James, but I'm hooked on the extra thrill of another man and now I'm having an affair with my boss, Jonathan. I'm also aroused by the idea of you and Michelle. My sweet sister, especially now that she's carrying your seed, growing in her womb.

"Anyway, these games of hide and seek have gone on long enough and I'm relieved that you didn't just ditch my ass and try to burn me the way that some foolish husbands would do. You were a lot smarter than that. You exacted, what did you use to call it?" Lisa asked me suddenly.

"Proportionate vengeance. Yes, that's more my style. I don't go nuclear. Nor would I just dump someone for a betrayal rooted in human weakness, not malice. It was wrong for you to step out on me, but I didn't think it deserved overkill. Turnabout is fair play, but I don't want to be cruel. Besides, you were ... are a great wife and the mother of my daughters. Danielle and Stacey deserve more than a part-time father or mother. You needed to be pay a price, to be forced to feel empathy, to suffer for the balancing of the karmic scales, but that was enough. Going overboard, being extreme, that would be wrong. I'm not a Christian anymore, which means that I don't buy into mercy, but I also reject cruelty as well," I answered, caressing her cheek and wiping away the tears.

"Yeah, I wondered about that and I've been meaning to ask why you haven't gone to church lately. Plus, there are those books. The Kama Sutra. Tropic of Cancer. The Meditations of Marcus Aurelius. Sun Tzu's the Art of War ... the works of de Sade, Sartre, Nietzsche, etc. You've always been an avid reader, but lately ... wow. I wonder where you fit in the time. Anything else that I should know about?" Lisa probed further, putting her head on my shoulder.

"Yes, I knew all along that Michelle was your idea. What, did you honestly think that I wouldn't guess? Your sweet sister, no matter how much she liked me, and I always knew that, would never have jumped my bones without your blessing, not unless she wanted to be the black sheep and prodigal daughter and all that jazz. And Missy, what about her? You didn't mention Missy. Anyway, I could tell that Michelle, and possibly Missy ... they were peace offerings, acts of contrition and propitiation on your part. You knew that I knew and you wanted to atone. Oh, and I knew the moment that you dropped James, because he kinda glowered at me whenever he saw me, as if blaming me for the end of your affair, and more than once, he tried to corner me, but I could tell that he wanted to tell on you, so I ignored him and forced him to go on. It was fucking hilarious," I laughed at that memory, which made Lisa giggle in spite of herself.

"Wow, he really was going to tell you, wasn't he? He wasn't bluffing. Fuck him!" Lisa cussed in spite of herself.

"No thanks. By the way, Jonathan's going to become senior pastor soon and quit that other job ... does his wife know about this affair? Do his parishioners? Do the deacons?" I wondered.

"No ... please don't say a thing. Please ... I'll do whatever you ask. Just please don't do that and don't ask me to be faithful to you from now on. I didn't mention Missy because Michelle and she are kind of an item and understood to be. Nobody told you or admitted it, because Mom and Dad don't approve, but they're known to be a package deal. Besides, I was sorta hoping that you'd be a lot nicer and more merciful if I didn't make any waves. I just had to come clean and hope that we could ... make a fresh start. I've been a very bad wife, but I want to be better ... can we please try that open marriage thing that you've wanted all those years ago? We've basically been doing that lately, anyway, haven't we?" Lisa pleaded with me.