Chapter 2: Home Sweet Home, to Me Anyway

Gazoo came to me just after I went to sleep that night. “Alex will you please look at these caves we prepared for you,” Gazoo asked me. The opening to the cave looked to be the same 10 feet wide, but the cave was both wider, and deeper. I could no longer see the pool of water; instead I saw a beautiful polished to a high gloss Mahogany door. I opened the door to see a working toilet made of solid rock, with a matching Mahogany seat and lid like normal everyday 21 century toilets. With a smooth rock handle to flush the toilet. A rock box that held the toilet paper dispenser inside, and was to automatically refill the paper as needed. Gazoo said it would always have toilet paper, and it was maintenance free. With those three different references about toilet tissue completely put to rest my fears about this very important issue. The area even had a whisper quite exhaust fan to remove any odors made inside of the room.

Next I took a closer look at the pool as it was no longer overflowing as there was a ring of small holes about three inches below the lip of the pool for the water to stay at that level. The floor was slightly sloped for any water hitting the floor to flow to holes in the floor. Lighting was both indirect and brighter lights at the rock vanity with a small mirror that was within the bathroom. The pool was just outside the bathroom. The sink had a very weak water flow until you pushed the smooth rock stopper into place the water flow increased to the ring of holes that let water escape below the lip of the sink.

I noticed the towel rack, and it had towels, two towels on the rack. I opened the small matching Mahogany door, and saw more towels and face towels as well. I was impressed; I wanted this cave just knowing I now had indoor plumbing. (Just let me tell you I had not thought about indoor plumbing when I first agreed to go. A few hours later I was using my taken for granted indoor plumbing. “I am a city boy I know I won’t like pissing and shitting outside, damn! And that fucking smell, maybe I had better think on this. I said aloud not thinking as I have always talked to myself, hearing my own voice was nothing new to me if I was alone.) I next opened the next Mahogany door and looked to an empty room, with rock shelving. Storage was the given answer.

I walked through a door to my office with a beautiful carved wood desk with the computer sitting on the desk, nine drawers, and a very comfortable office chair to go with the desk. A large flat screen TV attached to the dark paneling along the wall closest to the desk facing the thick leather couch, along with several thick leather chairs, and four movie recliners with cup holders along two different walls. Lastly a tall matching wood file cabinet, with a color printer encased in wood trim to match the office, near the small supply closet.

When I walked into my bedroom with its locking thick wooden door I was floored, a dresser, a large chest of drawers, and a large wardrobe. Each piece was made of rock with wood in-lays, and like in the bathroom in the bathroom it was polished to a gleaming shine. The dresser and the two nightstands were gleaming rock with wood counters, and the counters had rock flush mounted accents. Along with wooden drawers with rock accents. Someone had went out of their way to deliver very special pieces of furniture.

Then I looked at the bed, it looked both wider, and longer than your average run of the mill king-sized bed. Between the wood and rock accents the bedroom furniture was very pleasing to my eye. I shudder to think what if I liked it this much, besides this type of furniture is not new to me. But the natives may not want to sleep on it because it’s beauty to them. I was shown faux bison, cave bear, cave lion, and smilodon bedspreads. With matching pillowcases, sheets, and blankets to all four of them. I was given a private bathroom off my bedroom to save having to walk to the other bathroom in the middle of the night. No pool nearby, just a toilet, a urinal, and a sink, matching the toilet, and sink in the other bathroom.

The ring of stones was replaced by a rock Mantel with wood accents, with the fireplace that was three feet deep, and four feet high. Inside the fireplace an Alien treated rock door to sweep the ashes into, and a heavy Alien treated adjustable rock grate for cooking. I was told if I built wood furniture it would be treated for me.

The work cave was a modern machine room, complete with a tool crib. The tools are outlined to make it easy to return them where they go with sizes shown for the tools also. With extra lighting to make the room very bright. The machine cave like the horse cave had beautiful two inch thick Mahogany wood doors. With four one inch transparent plexi-glass windows, along with ten foot wide x twelve foot high roll up overhead garage doors. Each door has the rock in-lays to add to the doors beauty. I had to assemble each of the doors myself, along with the garage openers as well. I wasn’t totally useless in the working mode I would need to assemble these.

As a late bonus I was given three 96 inch x 36 inch pre-hung front doors for all three caves. And a seven foot wide x twelve foot high matching roll up overhead garage door. That was identical to the other overhead garage doors, only with slightly smaller dimensions are the only difference.

Gazoo had pointed out the many skylights located with-in the cave roof through all of the caves. I liked the strong natural light coming into the cave.

“Do you like what we have came up with for you? You are close to a very good water source. You are centrally located amongst you neighbors both Cro-Magnon and Neanderthals with multiple bands of each group. And plenty of megalosaurs, bison, and aurochs to care of your meat needs. And horses if you can catch them. Gazoo both asked, and said.

“Gazoo I can see the things that you have shown me are all top notch and I want to thank everyone who worked on everything in this project. The cave furniture is beautiful without a doubt. I really want to thank you for the indoor plumbing as I was surely going to ask if toilets were possible. All of the weapons are something I hope I can use to both save, and feed me. I love the caves once I have enclosed them it will be like home thanks to you and your team. I want this to work for both you and me.” I told Gazoo.

“Now Gazoo as I don’t have a sawmill handy can I have a medium, and a large Chainsaw that somehow runs on water, and lubed with animal fat to trim the trees to build my enclosures, and for firewood? I wish to ask for something to remind me of home you may not want to grant it, but I would like to challenge your team to do these items as well as the rock furniture came out. I would like a real midnight blue King Ranch Ford F350 with tandem rear axles with dual wheels, and a twelve foot bed with blood red tuff coat applied to the bed. With a capacity of at least 4,000 pounds. With spear resistant glass. All of the bells, and whistles that can be found in a Ford King Ranch Pick Up truck. And made completely of titanium to be Ford Tough. And be extra strong throughout the truck, with a digital gauge to let me know if I am about to exceed the weight limit of the truck, trailer, or the wagon.” I asked Gazoo.

“Also Gazoo as I don’t believe I can lift many of the animals I will soon be shooting. Would it be possible to get a removable miniature tower crane? That way I can easily lift the animals into the truck, wagon, or the trailer, after they are shot. Both cranes would need a 360 degree unrestricted rotation, 3 stage extendable boom. I only need the cranes on both the wagon and truck only,” I asked Gazoo.

“As fossil fuels are not available around here please whatever power source needed to make this work. If possible I would like to open the hood and a V something even if it is fake shell around the real power source. With a titanium brush guard with a overhead lights, and lights in the brush guard. If possible I would like a three axle dual wheel low boy titanium trailer with a capacity of at least 10,000 pounds. For the winter I would like a plow to attach to the truck to clear a path for a horses and in front of the caves. Also for winter 4 sets of dual tires with chains already attached to the tires.” I said.

“Lastly concerning the truck in the machine cave, a in-ground hoist to lift the truck to change the truck tires like in a service garage. As well as park the truck and trailer in the machine cave. And lastly any knowledge I may need to maintain the truck, if it is something I need to know which I hope I won’t need to use any such knowledge.” I said.

“Alex here we go again you are something else I mean. Just when I thought we were just about done you come back with a truly big, I want something. I will get back with you about this new request I have to meet with a few bosses about this,” Gazoo said.

I knew he wasn’t the last word in the decision making procession, by the way the last big decisions was made. Well we will see how it goes.

“Alex as we are this close and you are really wanted plus looking back on your life, you really were a car nut from a child. Since you stated this truthfully, we know would you long for a truck, or car. So there is no need to punish you like that, for we know this is truly a very strong desire. I hope this will conclude your surprises, please. We still have to take your body through the changes to get your body back to the form it was at 18 years old, Plus give you all the knowledge you both want, and or need.” Gazoo said.

“About that Gazoo after looking at some of those Neanderthal’s could I make a few changes to my body,” I asked.

“Like what changes Alex?” Gazoo asked.

“Could I gain 3 inches of height to be 6’-5”, 265 pounds, and built like Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson. On the training trip I want to learn the martial art forms of Jeet Kune Do, Aikido, Kempo, and Krav Maga for unarmed combat. Less of a chance to have to shoot someone. And lastly as I am good size in the locker room now, I like to improve in case they are better blessed where I am going. No serious freak of nature size, I just want to be seriously blessed is all if you get my meaning. Last, but no means least, much better eyesight.” I said.

“Done to all of that.” Was Gazoo’s answer. To tie up my not being here I was traveling since nobody would be looking for me anyway. I was flat out against faking my own death, a karma thing I really believed in. So I was given a share of a large lottery to travel I never went back to my apartment after signing the check and setting up my accounts for the money, a 26 year payout.

After checking my list and adding a few things that came to mind I ended up with 5,500 pounds not including the truck and trailer, but Gazoo had OK’d it all, so I was good as gold as far as I was concerned. I slept through the trip to my new world, I don’t know whether it took a minute, or a year. I just know when I woke up I was dizzy, very thirsty, and very hungry.

Gazoo went over my health issues. “You are now immune to any known viruses from your own world, and any known viruses from this planet that can harm you. Nor can you make any of the natives sick with your old earth germs. Will you miss these?” Gazoo asked while holding up my glasses. “If I do I will put on one of the many pairs of sunglasses I had got to trade with my new neighbors.” I said. Gazoo asked me to read the standard Eye Chart from 20 feet away. “Please read the smallest line you comfortably see.” Acme Printing Co. All Rights Reserved.” I read to Gazoo. The print that I had just read looked as big as the first line with the letter E so large it was the only letter on that line. to me when I read it out loud.

“Your eyesight is now more like that of two very powerful zoom lenses that can work together, or independently of each other. You will have to practice this skill, as with any new skill the more you practice this skill the better and more natural it will become. Both the zooming of the eyes together and each of the eyes has ability to work independently. Lastly be careful of this skill you will not always like the visions you may you see after zooming in to see something up close. And you now also have a photographic memory so these visions will be both permanent, and unforgettable. Another new skill to work on also.” Gazoo informed me.

“Your hearing is something you will have to work on immediately as your hearing is so strong you can be overwhelmed by this ability more so than your new eyesight. Special earmuffs will be given to you, but please expect some unpleasantness with this skill. Please for your own sake and sanity please use the earmuffs as you work, and hunt until you gain some control over your hearing. Otherwise it will get painful for you, as your hearing will become just that sensitive.”

“In your bare feet you now stand 6’-5” and weight-in at 265 pounds. You are now stronger than most men, and can run as fast if not faster than most men also. Your defense package also included Kendo for sword skills, and Boxing. You now have a World Class Jab with either hand, and one punch knockout power with either hand. As you have spent 65 years being left-handed you will most likely think left-handed most of the time. But you are now ambidextrous, and equally good with either hand. More things for you to practice perfecting.” Gazoo said. “That other issue will take care of its self when the need arises for real use the first time. Just remember you asked for it. It was with-in the plans to touch it up but since you asked we let a technician who likes those type of things do what he liked for you. He claims you will be very, very happy with his work.” Gazoo openly laughing now about that last little piece of information. You have excuse me if I am just a little worried about my soldier, I wanted to ask real bad hoping I won’t be hating the results of my purely vanity request.