Chapter 24: Faster On The Draw

The Rock and Roll Reverend from Detroit preaches,

“It is a given LA Law,
someone’s faster on the draw.”
(from “Shakedown” sung by Bob Seger)

Amen.

This is about one time when I was faster on the draw. But not by much. I still get shivers about how close I came to losing this shoot-out. It might have cost me $50 million.

If one were to ask the name of the most famous gunfighter, I suspect a popular response would be “Billy the Kid.” But “gunfighter” might be overgenerous, as I have heard that Billy shot more folks in the back, and he probably counted them the same as the others. Still, the label sticks.

Lesson learned. Somebody who fights fair loses in every fair fight. The trick to better your odds of a long life is to tilt the odds in your favor before the other guy does.

With this in mind, I always believed the better path is to get one of my friends or enemies, whichever is more inclined, to shoot my enemy in the back before he can draw. Not very fair, I know, and probably not quite what the Reverend Seger was preaching about the Beverly Hills cops. But I strongly believe in my own health over somebody’s vague and frankly unhealthy ideal of fairness.

Now, there are not too many fast-draw gunfights on Main Street LA these days. (Maybe there should be, especially in the sequel/reboot-themed movie industry.) But the basic theory does apply to love and life and money. Which leads me to Abril.

All partners of Huttle, Shunt, Barnes and Associates, participate in the wife exchange, and Abril was nominated as the wife In needed to steal from the first. She would prostitute herself to old white guys on my behalf.

Abril is a strong, beautiful, confident and stubborn woman who has been successful doing confidence work at a very high level for the majority of her life. She was not crazy about switching to what she viewed rightly as prostitution, so I had to identify the proper motivation. That meant letting her in on the confidence part of the game.

As a young girl Abril idolized the long cons her father used to pull off. She had helped her Dad in his cons and at 15 she also acted as the family banker, shrewdly converting earnings into gold as a growth investment that had no messy paperwork or taxes. When her father was arrested in California they had about 40 pounds of gold in a safe deposit. It was not enough.

To get more money for her dad’s expensive appeal, Abril went to Vegas. There she overreached (don’t visitors always?), got caught (“he didn’t look Sicilian,”), suffered significant abuse (mainly drugs and electrics - she avoids both now). She escaped by faking her death using a drug that had a fair chance to kill her. One of her partners, an older woman who helped her escape, was not so fortunate.

Broken and deeply scarred on the inside, Abril moved to LA with her mother and 2 young siblings. It was a dangerous zip code, there were break-ins and assaults, but the police could not be bothered. She was at her wits end when one of our guys recruited her for 49. The lure was a safe home for Mom and a safe school for her young siblings. The price was teaching our people in picking locks (including handcuffs) plus some basic sleight-of-hand, pickpocket, and con skills. She made friends and fit in quickly. But she came with baggage in the form of her two roommates; Martha and the Greek.

To join me in my con I offered Abril $3 million minimum at completion of my con against 10% of the gross, which (at the time) I figured would be in the $30 to $35 million range, within 5 years. If anybody could spring her father, that should be enough to pay for their services. Alternatively, if no lawyer would take the case, then for that much cash one could look at a helicopter rescue and a hit-men to kill the “untouchable” who was pulling the strings.

When I offered Abril the job I was clear about the sex - it was business only, no recreational hanky-panky, but when it was required she had to be convincing. It was a fair deal for what she wanted. She thought about it for a day, then said “yes” and started taking off her clothes - she knew she was attractive and didn’t believe I was serious about not “trying her out.”

Well, as an ego thing she wasn’t overjoyed that I didn’t “have to” screw her repeatedly on the spot. She was not used to hearing “no.” She had a wonderful body which I praised at every opportunity. But my bit of self control paid dividends because it bought some trust and respect for me. She committed - for this business only - and we were partners.

That was over a year ago. Now I was ahead of schedule and the take looked bigger. Abril was more than happy with my progress. I was more than happy with her help. She was invaluable at the monthly law firm socials where lots of old white men wanted to stick their wrinkled old peckers into her fine young body. She was repulsed by most of them, but as her role required, she never let it show. She said she had done much worse for much less.

The last few weeks had been very successful for me.

Sam, my computer witch, was happy and secure on a pink leash, but after our overnight date she WANTED to help me, plus I had opened the door for my loyal uncle to explore marriage with her.

Gracie’s cold-hearted stealing bitch of a mother was dead, so she needed me. Even if she had not seen my face she begged to be my adopted sister with benefits. Plus she 69ed Marta. How cool was that! Besides being hot, willing and barely 21, Gracie was rich. She would be my true wife in my heart, it would happen as soon as Darnel was discovered and had his final, very painful days.

Li became devoted to me after a 24-hour date, ending with the magic word “concubine.” She would go to jail and leave her crippled mother to avoid testifying against me.

Resha was now in a good place, she trusted me because her baby was protected due to me. She was on the job as a casual spy and I would get her closer. She was somehow very HOT in my mind. Her body was objectively not as good as Gracie or Abril, but she was an exotic treat, a set of very specific appeals: needy, the dark skin, the over-the-edge figure, the outstanding sexual skills, and uniquely a willingness to debase herself completely for me.

I had locked all 4 down. Plus, I now had Nia, Irene and Cynthia as in-progress projects, with Sin-Sin/Cynthia being the closest to completion. Since she was going to college, she was a longer-term project, but I could use that.

As I thought about it, the weakest and most critical link in my chain was Abril because of how our link depended on her love for her father. If he died in prison for any reason, or if she was convinced that nothing could be done to spring him, or if she developed a stronger interest in somebody else, I could lose her and my plan would be set back or killed completely. All those things were possible and I was naturally risk averse since I was investing hundreds of 12-hour days in this project.

I was especially worried about Abril’s basic carnal interests - which I honestly had no clue about - displacing her desire for her father’s freedom. Abril was a very hot 23 year old woman who had only seen her father twice in 5 years, so as time went on she became more vulnerable to lust and it’s variations (love, desire for kids, orgasms, a more attractive face, more adoring attention from a lover, etc.). Meanwhile the memory of her father faded.

What were Abril’s sexual interests? She liked to tease me, teasing is her natural state, but after that first misunderstanding she showed zero sexual interest in closing the deal with my handsome male self. I am told that I am pretty irresistible, so clearly she had tastes that were not normal. I knew she had done girls by choice, and guys as a job. I imagine that her time in Las Vegas did not endear her to men in general.

I must also say that Abril is an extremely stubborn woman who has no sense of proportion when her judgment is questioned. Her very volatile hispanic temper can be set off by the slightest thing. In all this April-related uncertainty and risk, my area of great uncertainty or risk centered on her two very unusual roomies, about which she was VERY stubborn with no obvious reason.

Abril shares her second apartment with 2 full-time “guests” who are not 49 members. Martha Vega was a 200 pound hispanic (or Greek) woman a little older than Abril. Kirkos was a 6 foot tall, 120 pound guy with a Greek passport who seemingly never spoke. Martha owns an old station wagon they use for getting groceries and such. The rumor was that Kirkos was kept nude and wore a cock cage 24/7. Abril has hinted at criminal activities in their shared past. Both of these guests actively despise me, in part because I take Abril with me when I need her, which is always on short notice, and is always overnight. I can guess what they imagine us doing. Both guests work at a dry cleaner within walking distance, they always work the same hours and walk both ways together.

You might wonder, given the type of person I am, why I don’t just eliminate Abril’s guests? I admit I am tempted, but there are problems. Wet work is work, and this close to home there are too many things that can go wrong. I cannot risk a hint of a problem. Abril works security full-time around the building, both patrolling on foot and watching monitors. Abril is VERY friendly and likable so she talks to everybody, especially her friends on the security crew. The apartment building is very secure, with cameras in every hallway and every doorway.

If her guests died in the building Abril would pour over the tapes and question everybody. If they died going to or from work there was too big a chance that some other 49 member or associate would see something. Finally, I needed a scenario that drives April TO me. If they died her first suspect would be me, so killing them without a bulletproof scenario, backed by plenty of facts, would drive her away.

For over a year I watched and thought and read reports and waited for my chance to eliminate this vexing weakness. Finally, through no fault of my own, two coincidences presented an opportunity for a fast draw contest, me against Martha and the sidekick.

One coincidence was a job I had for grandfather. A friend stole from my grandfather and in the drug business the consequence was painfully clear for all concerned. The friend, a married guy we employed, fell in love with a charming cocksucker who wanted money for a sex-change operation. They were planning to run off to Thailand. Grandfather’s money seemed easy to grab. It was my job to turn their dream into a funeral.

As I thought about my problem with Abril’s guests, there might be a way I could frame them with the sex-change scenario. Nobody in 49 did because it was my grandfather’s business. But I still needed two more things: a way to get Abril to blame herself, and a sure-fire story to get her to run to me.

That was when a bank closed.

It is funny how things turn out sometimes. Suddenly I was served what I needed on a golden platter, purely because I was always thinking of this problem and was ready when the pieces fell into place. There is a lesson there.

Monday June 2, 2008
Walking Her Gold

On Monday morning June 2nd Abril walked a little over a half mile to her bank with her very sturdy wheeled suitcase, filled it with the contents of her safe deposit boxes, and walked it back home. Our rules required her to report “valuables on the grounds” so she reported it to me.

Three months before, Abril’s bank sent official notice that on June 15 they were closing the branch Abril used. Abril did not see that notice, or the one’s that came the next two months. However, she eventually heard about it while chatting with an older resident, and she confirmed the facts with a call.

Two new modern banks had sprung up in the area, they used attractive promotions (with fine print) to steal the old bank’s customers. Abril’s old fortress of a bank had her safe deposit boxes - two large ones. The new banks used cheaper “coffee shop” buildings that did not offer that service. These days there are not enough customers in our zip code who need safe deposit boxes in the area.

Monday evening Abril dropped by my apartment and “reported to me” that she had something like 35 to 40 pounds of gold coins (Krugerrands, Maple Leafs, Pandas etc.) worth roughly half a million dollars at then-current (mid-2008) prices in the locked wheeled suitcase, which was now in her closet.

Of course I asked about her if the words “secure” and “wheeled” belonged in the same sentence. She ignored that and kept going.

It was family money earned between her father’s release after his first bust in Florida and when she was captured in Vegas. She intended to use it to pay for her Father’s release from the second bust, with anything left over going to “the little ones” for education so they would not have to grift. However, she soon learned it was not close to enough, no top lawyer would take the case with only that amount of ante.

I told her I could have driven her to the bank, but she wanted to assert her independence.

Next I warned her that she should not have that much gold in her apartment, that was change-your-life money which could seriously tempt an honest person to change their most basic values. It was more than enough to override the familial loyalty that 49 depends on to keep the organization secure.

I did not mention her guests as prime suspects. We both knew they had no family loyalty. In fact Abril really had no idea of their true identity. But she trusted them because they found her when she was down and (I suspected) at least one of them licked her pussy.

Abril is extremely stubborn by nature, and I raised her stubborn streak. It does not take much. Using colorful language she said she would handle her business and I should keep my snoopy nose out. She claimed she would keep the gold safe, “because nobody knew about it and the building was secure.” She would put it in another safe deposit box some time (I said I would lend her a car for the move) but she wanted to take her time and pick the right bank so I should just butt out of her business. End of conversation. She went away mad.

This was 49 business, so I had to react. I ordered a 24-hour tail on her guests - a loose tail with a standby intercept if they broke routine - and a GPS tracker for Martha’s station wagon. It was summer, otherwise I would have risked a GPS in Martha’s coat. The downside of this order was that Abril would see it in 10 days in the security log unless I killed it or took other steps by then. So I had just put myself on a clock.

Madness, thy name is woman.

However, the conversation did activate my thoughts about getting rid of her guests.

Tuesday June 3
The Plan

Tuesday I put a simple plan together based on that gold, a marriage of opportunity and plausibility. Simply put, I would remove her guests and frame them to make it look like they took her gold and headed to Thailand to pay for sex-surgery. Abril was right about building security, it was good. So if the only people in or out of her apartment were those two, and they were gone, plus the gold was gone, Abril would assume they took it. Paying for sex-surgery provided a reason for them to take it.