Chapter 21: Only the Lonely

Monday February 9

By lunch, word of Peggy and me no longer dating was all anyone wanted to talk about. I had grabbed Yuri when he saw Peggy and Mitch holding hands. My little Russian tough guy had to be convinced I was okay with it. I appreciated he would be willing to deal with something like that. Peggy nodded to me to say thanks. Luckily, Mitch was none the wiser.

I walked into lunch late, because I'd had to fend off Lisa Felton. She'd gotten it in her head I should take her to the Valentine's Dance on Saturday.

"What was the reason you couldn't go out with me last spring?" Lisa asked as she slowly moved towards me. She herded me into a corner like I was a frightened colt.

"My friends told me I couldn't," I admitted.

There was no way would tell her they all thought she was a prostitute.

"Where are all those friends now?"

"They are in college," I admitted another factoid she felt was important.

"This year, what was your excuse?" she asked as I took an involuntary step back.

"Ummm, I was dating Peggy."

"Why else?" she goaded me.

"You dated Brad Hope," I said as I felt my back touch the wall.

She gave me a smirk. She finally had cornered the guy she had chased since freshman year.

"Let's call Brad a really bad idea on my part. Since then I have gone out with a few guys on dates. None of them got past second base. I have always known you were the guy for me. Word is you don't like to share your toys, so I didn't want to give you the wrong idea. Plus, I'm trying to restore my reputation. I think you're just the guy to help me with that."

I raised my eyebrows. How could I, the biggest male slut at Lincoln High - at least, according to Gina - help her reputation? She saw my expression and almost lost her smoldering look she had been using on me.

"I call bullshit," I shot back.

She knew this tactic hadn't worked. She went a different direction, one I had no real defense against.

"Okay, I could really care less about my reputation. People are going to believe what they want, and no matter how much I deny it, they'll never change their minds. There is one thing neither of us can deny, though: you think I'm hot. I see the way you look at me. There is no denying you want me."

I bit my bottom lip. She had me there. If I thought I could get away with it, I might just throw her against the wall and have my way with her. It wasn't just me either. I think every guy at Lincoln High had fantasies about Lisa Felton. There was something about her that woke your inner animal. Right now Mr. Happy was trying to wrest control of the body from the big brain.

She gave me a little pout and caressed my arm. She knew what effect she had on me when goose bumps appeared on my arm and I shivered. I jerked my arm back and cracked my funny bone on the wall. That was enough for the big brain to retain control.

"Lisa, we both know when we get together it is going to be something special. We might actually miss a week of school," I said as she gave me a doubtful look. "I think you are not looking for a torrid weekend."

"No, that is not what I want," she confessed.

"If that is the case, do you really want to be the rebound girl?"

I was surprised it sounded logical. I had pulled the argument out of my ass as a Hail Mary attempt. I could see her think about it. Then her eyes snapped up and stared me down. She got a big grin.

"Have you ever heard the term sexual healing?"

Mr. Happy, the sneaky bastard, caused me to lean down and kiss Lisa. Lisa hit me like a runaway linebacker, who Bert forgot to block, and slammed me against the wall. I may have blacked out a little because I had no idea Coach Hope had watched our byplay until he physically pulled us apart. He had an amused look on his face.

"About the time I think you might be acceptable to date my daughter, you do something like this. Go wash your face. You have lipstick all over it," he ordered me. "You young lady need to go to lunch and I better not see you anywhere near Mr. Dawson. If I do, you both will be getting detentions."

I ended up doing something I have never done before. I found the handicap stall and beat Mr. Happy into submission. There was no way I could walk around the rest of the day with him standing tall. When I finally got to lunch I found it was vegetarian day. I was not happy when all the sack lunches were gone. I grabbed three apples and two bananas. I then went to the vat of peanut butter and scooped out a healthy serving onto my plate. I just prayed Eleanor hadn't licked the spoon.

I found Mike and Gina and pointed at them. They followed me to an empty table, well it had three freshmen sitting at it, but they decided to leave. I wasn't normally a bully. I would make it up to them later.

"Gina tells me you did a photo shoot with Kate Upton and Adrienne," Mike ventured.

I pulled out my iPad and put in the password. I handed it to Mike so he could see the pictures from the weekend. While he flipped through the pictures, I cut up my fruit and dipped it into the peanut butter. Gina gave me a funny look, but kept her peace. When Mike was done, Jeff darted over and stole my iPad. I figured it would keep everyone else busy, so I could talk to these two.

"I've decided it's time," I said.

Mike was always a good straight man.

"Time for what?"

"It's time that the two of you go out," I said as they both gave me a look. "No whining. Gina, you think Mike is cute. I have heard you comment on his butt more than once."

Poor Mike went beet red.

"And I have heard Mike say you're okay," I said with a straight face.

Gina went from shocked to pissed in under a second. She glared at the two of us.

"I never said that," Mike complained. "I've always said she was good looking. You were the one who said she was just so-so."

Gina turned on me, as I held my hands up.

"I had to say that. You were dating my best friend."

I don't think she bought it, but she had bigger things to worry about. I would need to watch my back for the next few days.

"Anyways, it doesn't matter what I think. What matters is Mike has it bad for you. Do a guy a favor and take him to the Valentine's Dance," I said to change the subject.

I kicked Mike under the table. He got the hint.

"Gina, will you go to the dance with me?"

She gave me a hard look and then turned to Mike and smiled. My work was done. I went to find the freshmen, and invited them to our table and showed them pictures from my weekend. Cassidy pointed over at Mike and Gina smiling at each other, and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

When I was done with practice at State, I went straight to Tom and Mary Dole's house. I hadn't gotten much news about Tracy. I figured they would tell me face-to-face, and feed me. When Mary opened the door, her face lit up.

"Have you eaten?" she asked.

If Mary was cooking, it wouldn't have mattered. I would have had a second dinner with them. Luckily I hadn't. I called Mom to let her know I would eat at the Dole's. Mary made fried chicken with all the fixings. During dinner, we just caught up on what was going on each other's lives.

Tom said he received the first cut of my ads for the single mother campaign. He showed me the shots they planned to use for the first wave of advertising. Adrienne and Kate both had come alive with their raw emotion.

"How could you, sorry," Mary said, getting caught up in the image which had me turn my back on them.

"I think if either of them were carrying David's baby, it would have been a whole different shoot," Tom said as he came to my defense.

Mary just nodded. We went to the living room and I brought up what I came over for.

"I want to see Tracy."

Tom and Mary looked at each other. Finally Mary nodded.

"Right now only family can see her. Let me call Dr. Hebert and see if we can get you in."

"Can she leave the facility?" I asked.

"Why do you ask?" Mary questioned.

"Saturday is Valentine's Day. I thought maybe I could spend the afternoon with her and then take her to dinner."

I could tell they weren't sure.

"Tell you what, talk to Dr. Hebert. See what she thinks. I'll abide by whatever she decides. I just miss my friend."

When I got home, Duke was a wild child. He and I were sent to my apartment for being too rowdy in the house. I hadn't taken him with me today because I planned on going to the Dole's. I didn't realize how much the girls wore him out while I did sixty-minutes-of-hell. I would have to bring him tomorrow.

Just before I went to bed, I received a text from Tami. I jumped onto video chat.

"Tell me everything," she ordered.

We spent the next two hours and talked about everything from Peggy dating Mitch, to Lisa Felton, to Halle, to my Valentine plans with Tracy. Tami, to her credit, just listened and every once-in-a-while asked a question to clarify something. She never made a judgment or suggestion until the very end.

"I want you to think about something. In the last few weeks, you have been close to Nancy, Halle, Peggy, Kara, Pam, Tracy, Kelly and now Lisa. Now I know you haven't slept with all of them, and in the cases of Nancy and Peggy, it has run its course. When do you think you will be ready to be with just one woman in your life? Oh, and another thing to think about is your need to get close to them so quickly. Can you just be friends with any of these girls?"

That brought me up short. In a little over three months, Tami would come home for the summer. Tami could see I got her message. She gave me a look that told me she loved me regardless if I was all over the map with women. The clear message was to get my act together if I expected her to start dating me.

"I love you," Tami said and then logged off before I could answer.

That was a calculated shot. I had to remind myself I was still only sixteen. Was I really ready to make a lifetime commitment, even if it was to Tami? I finally had to agree with my mom. It might be too soon for me to date Tami.

Wednesday February 11

One thing I noticed was I had almost no free time. In the morning, I would get up and run a little with Duke. He was growing like a weed and was full of energy, so he needed the exercise. He was a good running partner. He wasn't confident enough to go off sniffing things, so he followed his pack leader. I wanted him to learn to stay with me because I didn't want to worry about a leash all the time.

Dad surprised me. He'd taken on the role to train Duke in the evenings. Duke was learning to sit, stay and come. Dad was also taught him things like to lie down in the other room when we ate. Duke had figured out that Kyle and Mack were sources of people food. Dad was waging a losing battle on that front.

I would run with Duke for several blocks and then take him back to the house where he would go terrorize my parents. Mom had put a foot stool at the end of the bed and he figured out how to navigate it to get some morning loving. I would then finish my run.

I would have breakfast and then go to school where I would lift weights. Then I would go to my classes. Jeff and I would skip out of last period study hall and come to my place. We would let Duke out of his crate and then take him to the gym. There was always someone willing to watch him while we worked out with Cassidy. We would then go to the dojo, and Cassidy would kick my ass.

I would take Jeff and Cassidy home and then eat dinner. I then would pick up Jeff, Wolf and Jim and meet everyone at State, to work on baseball. Next I would come home and study and then go to bed.

I could see where the workouts and practicing the fundamentals of baseball had started to pay dividends. My hand speed and control of the bat had made a big jump from my freshman year. I had learned to place the ball by trying to hit down each baseline, up the middle and bunt.

I was surprised when word seemed to get around that we worked out at State each evening. It seemed like someone from State's coaching staff would show up with a few of their players each evening. They taught us drills and techniques which we could all see would make us better players.

Some of the most fun I had was learning from Shiggy. Since I started working with him my fastball speed had jumped from 78 to 82 mph. I now used my strong leg muscles to give me extra pop on the ball. I was found I had more control also. Part of it was just a natural growth in talent, but a big part came from Shiggie's coaching.

Last year I had four pitches. The four seam fastball, two seam fastball, the fork ball and the changeup. Shiggy had added a slider and curve ball. I about killed Wolf the first time I threw my curve in live batting practice. It forgot to curve. It's a good thing we are good friends or he might have taken it the wrong way. Plus, I could out run him. Jim was also good enough to let me hide behind him until Wolf finally calmed down.

So what was my point of talking about my schedule? I didn't have time to find a replacement for Peggy. She really had gone out of her way to accommodate my schedule. She made a point to come to my house and have dinner with us. Half the time, she and Dad or Mom made the meal. She would be waiting for me when I got back from baseball, spoiling my dog. We would study and spend some quality time together. Then she would go home.

I had no idea how good she had been to me until she wasn't there anymore. I missed her, but when I saw her with Mitch, I found I wasn't jealous. That surprised me. I had to think long and hard about that one. I would have gone nuts just a few months ago. I finally figured out Peggy had done a good job to prepare me. She was never the jealous type. She had always insisted that we just dated. I found I honestly felt like we were more friends than lovers.

Two things hit me. First, I was lonely. I know, it had only been a few days, but I missed my time with Peggy. I was used to our talks every day. I missed the scent her cinnamon shampoo left in her hair. I longed for someone to just touch me and make me feel cared for. I missed the intimacy we had. Why did I need the intimacy so badly?

The second thing I needed to work through was what Tami had told me. Was I ready to settle down? I didn't know.

If all this was just about sex I could find that with just a few phone calls. Hell, Lisa Felton was chasing me. Deep down I knew it would be a mistake, but I had a sinking feeling she might catch me this time. Tami told me I needed to get it out of my system, before she got back from England. Could there be a better way to do that, than with Lisa?

All of this swirled around in my head as I went to lunch. I don't know why, but I saw Lisa looking for a seat and I walked up behind her.

"Let's find a table of our own," I suggested.

She about dumped her tray because I startled her. She checked to see if I was teasing her, or if I was serious. She must have decided I was serious because she found a small table off to the side.

"So what do I owe the pleasure of eating with you today?" she asked.

"I thought if we were going to go out, we should get to know each other better," I said.

"Look, David, I'm not really in the mood to play any games, today. So if you are just leading me on, please tell me. I really don't think I can get my hopes up anymore."

I took a deep breath. The last thing I wanted to do was to hurt her feelings. Was I ready for the backlash this would cause? Hell, just having lunch with her would get me a bunch of shit from my friends. Actually dating her would be much worse. The thing was though, I could survive it. I was a stronger person than I was a year ago. Not to sound conceited, but if I said it was okay, then my friends would accept her. That was one of the benefits of being a leader, or an alpha male as my uncle would have said.

"Here is the deal. I would like to date you. I don't know if we would ever become more than that, but I wouldn't rule it out. How about I take you out Friday night? We do the dinner and dancing thing and see how it goes. I'll warn you though, I have plans for Saturday. Before you ask, I don't plan on going to the Valentine's Dance. I have a friend who is sick and I want to spend the day with her."

"Tracy?" Lisa asked.

"Yes."

"What about your other friends? What about the actress?" she asked.

"Lisa, I never said I was going to be exclusive with you," I said as she stiffened. Even to me I sounded like a dork. "I didn't mean to be so harsh, but for now we would just be dating. Could we get to the point where we're exclusive? I don't want to give you any false hope; but, maybe."

"You are either the biggest dick, or the most confident guy I know," she complained.

"If you need to test the biggest dick theory, I might have some suggestions," I teased her.

"I might enjoy that," she said with a smile and then got serious. "Seriously, though, I appreciate you letting me know where I stand. Most guys would have just taken me out and then dumped me. I can't really see you doing that. Before I agree, I have one more concern. What are your friends going to think of us going out?"

"They are not going to be happy. I can talk to them and they will grudgingly accept it, but I doubt it will keep them from making comments which might be hurtful. You need to decide if you want to go through what's coming or not. I wouldn't think any less of you if you decided not to."

"To know me is to love me," Lisa said with a big smile.

I could almost feel the earth tilt on its axis when Lisa crawled onto my lap and kissed me. I wasn't aware everyone in the lunch room had watched us. Lisa and I both noticed the whole room went quiet. Lisa looked me in the eyes and started giggling.

"Oh, shit. I think we may have just become the top targets for gossip around here," Lisa almost whispered.

"Then let's give them something to talk about. Take my hand and we'll walk out of here with our heads held high," I suggested.

We did just that. The lunch room was quiet until we hit the door and then pandemonium erupted. Lisa and I laughed as we walked to our next class.

I expected some backlash, but I didn't expect it so soon. Waiting for Jeff and me when we went home to let Duke out, was Peggy.

"What do you think you are doing?" she started.

Jeff, the wise man that he was, fled to my apartment. He would let Duke out while I dealt with this. I raised an eyebrow and looked at her. This of course did not unnerve her at all. She knew me too well.

"Don't even go there," she warned me. "I want to know why I hear you are going out with Lisa Felton only a few days after we broke up."

I think even she realized how dumb it sounded.

"I think you just said it. You broke up with me."

I would leave the rest unsaid. Things like; she no longer had a say in who I decided to date. I figured it would just get me chewed on, even more. Tami had taken the time to teach me little things like that, the hard way. No one ever said I wasn't trainable.

"I don't care. It doesn't give you the right to go out with her."

"I'm sorry if I'm about to say something really stupid, but how does our breaking up, you know, where you said you no longer wanted to date me; then you started to date someone I happen to loath, how does that not take the right, to say who I date, away from you?" I asked.

"I'm glad you realized you were asking a stupid question. I was afraid I was going to have to explain it to you," she said as a jab at me. I gave her a dirty look. "I have the right because you still love and respect me as a friend."

I thought about it for a moment, but it only made my head hurt so I gave up. It had to be a girl thing. This was what every guy thinks if he can't figure something like this out.

"Let's assume I understand why you get to pick out who I date," I said to set the hypothetical premise. "Why can't I date Lisa Felton?"

Peggy gave me a smug look. I suddenly didn't feel like I was on firm ground for some reason.

"Lisa is related to you. Your mom's maiden name is Felton," Peggy informed me.

"I call bullshit!" I snapped back.

"Oh, really? You might want to verify it, before you act like you live in the backwoods and knock up your cousin."

That brought me up short. Peggy gave me a peck on the cheek and got into her car and left. Jeff had heard the last part of the exchange and had a silly grin on his face.

"Now I know why you want to go to Kentucky," he said as he took off running.

Duke thought it was great fun when Jeff ended up in a snow drift!

Before I went to the gym, and did sixty minutes of hell, I called Kendal.

"Do you work for me?" I asked.

"Yes, why do you ask?"

"I just want to make sure you don't work for my mom or dad. I want to be sure you answer to me!"

"That is an interesting question. Technically I work for your mom, since she signed your contract papers. Why do you need to know? Are you thinking of getting emancipated?"

"No, I just need you to do something, and I don't want my mom to know."

"This is interesting. Tell you what? I give my word I'll not tell your mom as long as what you are asking me to do is not immoral or illegal."

"Define immoral for me," I asked for clarification sake.

"Just spit it out. If you don't trust me by now, then you never will."

"I need you to find out if Lisa Felton and I are related, before Friday."

"Oh, Dear Lord! Did you knock her up? You know I saw what you did to poor Kate and Adrienne."

"Bite me! Chop, chop, get to work," I ordered.

"Keep it up, and I'll call your mom," she threatened and hung up on me.

I think she was working on it.

I got home from the dojo to find cars in my driveway. Peggy and Kendal had beaten me home, and I had to park on the street. Of course, Duke spotted Precious and the two of them were rolling in the snow. Duke had gotten to be all legs and clumsy. Poor Precious, the evil cat from all nine levels of hell, had the upper hand. I had to pick her up by the nap of the neck to get her to let my puppy go. I was amazed when he just shook it off, and led me to the back door.

Duke barked to announce our presence.

"Oh, good, David is here," Mom said cheerfully. "Let's go to the office."

I made a point to ignore Kendal. I had serious doubts if she would be my agent after this betrayal. It was so hard to get good help these days. Even Dad followed us into the office. I wondered what was going on when Mom dialed the phone and put it on speaker.

"Hey, Mom, did you find your genealogy chart?" my mom asked my grandmother.

"I did. Now tell me again. What was the girl's name?"

"Lisa Felton. She's sixteen, and has a brother Billy, who is a couple of years younger," I said.

"Yep, here they are. Your great grandfather had two boys, Claude and Jedidiah. So you are related to Lisa."

"Thanks, Mom," my mom said and then hung up.

Everyone looked at me.

"If you decide to start dating your cousins, make sure you are serious about it," Dad advised. "I would hate to start trouble within the family."

Of all the people in the room, I had not expected my dad to take a shot at me. I think my mom was as shocked, because she turned and looked at him with her mouth open, and then burst out laughing.

Then I remembered a conversation I'd had with my mom. Grandpa Felton wasn't her biological father. Her biological father had a drinking problem and had died. Grandpa Felton was Mom's step-father. I looked in her eyes, and she saw I figured it out. She just shrugged. They all left the office except Peggy. She grabbed my hand and we sat down.

"Look, it was just a shot in the dark. I needed to think before I talked to you," she explained.

"Lay it on me," I said.

"You're one of the good ones. Everyone knows you are a slut, but a lovable slut. You don't go out to ruin a girl's reputation, or do mean spirited things. You're like that uncle we all have who is not quite right, but we love him. If you didn't have a really good heart, I would never have dated you."

"Okay," I said as I waited for the other shoe to drop. There had to be a but in there somewhere.

"Lisa Felton has a reputation, whether she deserves it or not," she said as she held up her hands so I wouldn't interrupt her. "David, I want you to think about something. Why would I come to you and try to stop you from dating her? I know you have dated other girls. I might not know all of them, but have I ever come to you and warned you off? I think you know I wouldn't be here if I didn't have strong feelings about this."

Peggy was almost in tears. I think even I knew dating Lisa was wrong. I had heard all the rumors. I didn't believe them all, but where there was smoke there was usually fire. Was it a cop-out?

Peggy knew if I went quiet I needed to think it through. She respected me, and let me decide. I think my knee jerk reaction was I wanted to date Lisa. I knew I could stand up to everyone and get away with it. The question was, just because I could, should I?

Part of being a leader was acting like one. Lisa Felton had an animal magnetism that drew me to her. Would I honestly take the relationship past just sex? That was the real question. Don't for one minute think I wouldn't do something just for sex. I was a teenage boy after all with hormones coursing through my body. Hell, I got a hard on several times a day. Lisa Felton was one of the causes of the swelling.

The thing I needed to think of was if I dated Lisa Felton would it in some way hurt the people around me. According to Peggy it would. Last year Cindy, Beth, Suzanne and Eve all agreed it would. Even Tami had made not so veiled threats to me if I dated her. If all the women I cared about felt so strongly about me not dating her, shouldn't I listen?

Then again there was the whole teenage boy wanting hot monkey sex.

I think Peggy could read my mind. It could have also been the bulge in my pants would grow and then go down.

"David, if this was just about sex, I would say you should go for it, but I just think you are better than this. I know you work very hard not to tarnish your public image. I think you also care what your friends think. I would hate for either to be hurt because you needed to get laid. I would also be shocked if you couldn't arrange to get laid by a number of friends with just a phone call."

I picked up my phone and dialed a number. Peggy heard her phone ring and looked at it. I smiled at her and she got a serious look on her face.

"Do you really want to sleep with me?" she asked.

I couldn't read her expression. Did I want to sleep with her? The honest answer was no, not if she was going to save her virtue until she was married. If she wanted to just have no strings attached sex, then yes.

"That depends on you," I said.

I started to feel guilty because I knew Peggy had just started a relationship with Mitch. Even though I thought Mitch was a jerk, I thought enough of Peggy to not put her into that position.

"I'm sorry. I should have never asked. I hope this hasn't hurt our friendship," I said.

"And there you go making me love you even more. I'm not stupid. I was actually surprised you never pushed me to go beyond where I put our boundaries. I also know you wanted more, but you put my feelings before yours. I'm sure if you had wanted to you could have convinced me. That is one of the things I will always appreciate about you. Just so you know, you asking made me very happy."

"Okay, I'll call Lisa and tell her we aren't going out," I said.

Even though I had gone along with what Peggy wanted, I didn't feel like I had caved. I actually thought it through and agreed with her. The other thing I had been holding off on was Pam. I thought the two of us could date until the end of the year and be happy. When Tami came home I would play it by ear. If the spark was still there, then it was an easy decision. Tami had always been the one.

Peggy stayed for dinner. Kendal saw the way I looked at her and she suddenly had to be somewhere else. After dinner I went up to my apartment with Duke to study. I wasn't able to concentrate because I had to have a talk with Lisa. I finally gave up and called her.

"This is a surprise. Can't wait until Friday to talk to me?" Lisa answered obviously she looked at her phone.

"Yeah, about that," I started.

"Seriously! What do I have to do to get you to take me out?" Lisa ranted. "Don't tell me, your friends think it's a bad idea."

"Did you know we are related?" I asked.

"Technically yes, but what does that have to do with it?"

"I just thought I would throw it out there."

"David, just man up. Tell me we are never getting together and I don't need to chase after you ever again. Don't keep making me hope. Please, just tell me," Lisa said as she started to cry.