Chapter 11: A Change of Scenery

By May, I knew that there was going to be no happy ending for the Cummings family. There was no improvement in Ralph's condition, and in fact, he seemed to be wasting away before our very eyes. I said nothing to him or to Deb about my observations, but it was impossible to believe they didn't see what I could see. He was very weak after his treatments now, eating nothing at all and sleeping more than waking during the day.

When I brought him into my home in May, he thanked me as he always did and collapsed into the easy chair. He seemed to be trying to summon some strength, but it wasn't there to be found.

"I'm dying, Ian. I don't know how much longer I can stand the chemotherapy. I'm almost at the stage when I should tell them to stop and let the disease take its course. Strangely, I'm not afraid of dying. I thought I would be, but that's not how I feel. It will almost be a gift. A release for Sharon and Deborah. I've been a burden to them and to you. I'm sorry about that, but I appreciate what everyone has tried to do to help me. I know it's been hard on you all. But I'm losing the willpower to fight any more."

"I don't know what to say," I admitted. "I should tell you to never give up, but I can see the toll the disease is taking on you. Are the doctors giving you any hope?"

"Oh, they have all sorts of schemes to arrest the progress, but in fact, they don't know if they will work either. And worse, the effects on my body are just too much to bear. The look in Sharon's eyes when I get home from these sessions is more than I can take. I usually just go to bed so I don't have to see her sorrow and pain. I think she's in as much agony as I am, Ian. I don't want this to go on much longer and destroy her. She's young. She'll find someone to take my place. She is entitled to her happiness and I don't want to be an obstacle to that."

I had no idea how to respond to his statement. I could see the pain this was causing him. Not just the physical pain, but the emotional pain as well. This was a good man whose time was being cut cruelly short. He deserved better, but there was nothing I could do or say that would make him better. I turned away so he wouldn't see my tears.

It wasn't a big shock when Deb told me that Ralph had cancelled his June treatment. Deb didn't say so, but I knew this was a family decision and they were resigned to losing their husband and father. I felt terrible as well as frustrated. All the science and wonderful drugs that man had invented could not save Ralph Cummings any more than it could save the little children who were afflicted with this horrible disease. I wondered more than once how I would have faced the inevitable if it were me instead of him. I would hope I would be as brave.

Ralph died in his sleep July 2, 2002, the day after Canada Day. He had been reduced to a shadow of his former self. I had prepared for this day and had arranged in advance to take some time off to be with Deb and Sharon. I knew they had many friends in their little town, but I had been part of Ralph's last days and I felt obligated to be there for them.

I was welcomed as part of the family, a role I wasn't quite comfortable with. Sharon made me feel as if I was a son, not a friend of her daughter. Deb made me feel something altogether different. She was very clingy, if that's a word. She was by my side thought the first couple of days prior to the funeral. She held my hand whenever I was nearby and while it wasn't sexual in nature, she took every opportunity to hold me and hug me.

Rick and Gail Cummings arrived from Kamloops the day before me and were there to offer support to his mother and sister. They were not surprised to see me, I discovered. Sharon and Deb had mentioned my help several times to them. I got a big thank you from Rick and a warm hug from Gail.

Sharon was holding up well considering. I suppose it was because Ralph's death was not a surprise. She had time to prepare herself for the inevitable. At the reception after the ceremony and interment, I got some idea of just how many friends the Cummings had made. If they were Sharon's support group, I was confident she would be okay. Deb had friends, but I noticed almost all of them were of her parents' age. I saw few younger people at the reception, and not many appeared to be close to Deb.

I was sleeping in a room at the other end of the house from Sharon Cummings's bedroom. It had served as an office for the business. Deb's room was next to mine, while Rick and Gail had the room next to Sharon. Sometime, in the dark of night, I was awakened as Deb crawled into my bed and reached out for me. I held her as I heard her sobs and felt the dampness of her tears. I was glad she came to me for comfort. She needed me then. I felt good about that. I wondered about her mother, however. There was no one in her bed to comfort her.

The next morning found the five of us sitting at the kitchen table, finishing breakfast.

"What are you planning on today, Deborah?" her mother asked.

"I'm taking Ian out fishing. The Cohoe are running and I heard a couple of our guests yesterday bragging about some nice big Chinook they landed. It's a beautiful day and I thought we'd run across to Young Point."

I looked up in surprise. I knew nothing about this plan. "Uhhm, I've never been successful at fishing before."

"No problem. I'll teach you," Deb said confidently.

"My daughter is a very accomplished boater and fisherman ... fisherwoman ... whatever," Sharon finished in mock frustration.

"Rick? What do you and Gail plan," Sharon asked.

"We've got a couple of high school buddies we want to connect with," he said. "They are living in Gibson's Landing, so we'll be there for the day. We'll probably stay for dinner, so don't plan on us being here. We'll be heading back to Kamloops on Saturday."

"What about you, Mrs. Cummings? What will you be doing?" I was worried she'd be on her own and brooding over the loss of her husband.

"I'm playing golf with my girls. It's a beautiful day and there's no place I'd rather be. If you're wondering, Ian, I accepted that I was going to lose Ralph some time ago. I'm not celebrating his passing, but I am going to celebrate the wonderful twenty-five years I had with him. I'm not sitting around this house bemoaning my husband's fate. There was nothing any of us could do that hadn't been tried.

"Make no mistake," she continued, "I'm going to miss him terribly. He was a good man and a wonderful husband and father. I want nothing more for Deborah than to find a man as good as her father. But I'm still reasonably young and I have a life to live. We have arranged to sell the store and with the money that will bring, I can live comfortably for a very long time. I won't be wearing black on the golf course today," she smiled. "If that makes me insensitive, so be it."

I was shaking my head. "I admire your attitude. You're right. You are still young and you still have many years to live. Take advantage of them to live a full life."

I got strong verbal support from Rick and Gloria for that.

"I intend to, Ian," she smiled. "I'm planning on doing the travelling that Ralph and I were never able to do, being tied down to the store. I've got a number of girlfriends who are footloose and fancy-free and we plan to live a little," she grinned.

I was about to ask Deb about her plans when I decided to wait until we were alone. If we were going fishing, there would be plenty of time to find out what her future held.

It was past ten in the morning when Deb backed her father's truck down the launch ramp. I was merely a spectator, but I was watching what she did so that in future I would be able to help. Deb had obviously done this before, and within two minutes the boat was floating and she was tying it up to the dock. Another two minutes had her parking the truck and trailer in the big lot above the ramp, then jogging down the path to the dock and the boat.

There's something to be said about Deb and jogging. It's a sight to behold. It was also very revealing. I was quickly aware that she was not wearing a bra. She was laughing as she walked briskly along the dock.

"What are you gawking at, Mister?" Her grin was quite mischievous.

"Take a guess. You are in good spirits today. I'm glad."

"We did our mourning in the past months, Ian. We did everything we could to make his last days comfortable and peaceful. You contributed to that as well. Dad was very grateful, as were mother and I. Now, here's your licence. Put this floater vest on and we'll get underway," she smiled.

"I'm sure you're wondering about the bra," she said as she started the engine. "It wasn't an attempt to tantalize you, although it seems to have done that," she chuckled, glancing at my crotch. "I don't wear one on the boat because if it got wet for any reason, it would chafe me raw in no time at all. I leave it behind for personal comfort."

I nodded. "That makes sense. Comfort before modesty. I wholeheartedly approve."

"It's going to be warm when we anchor, so the vest will be coming off, and probably the sweatshirt as well. I've stowed the lunch in the fridge below. We have plenty of fuel, so off we go. Can you handle the forward line, please?"

"Sure," I said, knowing what I should do from my experience at the shop dock. When I made my way to the bow, I could see we were tied off to a dock cleat and I jumped off the boat onto the dock to release the line, but held it until Deb gave me the signal. When she did, I climbed back aboard and pulled the line in quickly before she engaged the transmission. She motored slowly out of the docking area into the open water before bringing the engine revs up and setting the boat on plane.

I'd had some experience with pleasure boats before, but none of this size and none on this part of the coast. The Cummings boat was a 23-foot cabin cruiser of recent vintage with a 200 horsepower outboard. There was also a nine-horse outboard on a separate mount, used for trolling. However, I was told today we would be mooching at anchor. Deb made a beeline for a distant island and a little over a half-hour later, we dropped anchor at the south-eastern tip of the island. We were not alone, but Deb assured me the others were fishing in the wrong spot and we had the advantage.

Our rods were nine feet long and very limber. I was surprised the reels were single action, something like a fly reel, but heavier. Before we did anything, however, Deb insisted we put sunscreen on and wear a hat. Both of us had sunglasses. Within a few minutes of arriving, I was down to a t-shirt and shorts, while Deb was wearing a polo shirt and shorts. We were in the lee of a light north-westerly breeze and it was very comfortable as we rocked gently at anchor.