Chapter 31: The Farm Part 3

I jolted awake in the dim light of the women’s dormitory, my skin crawling with the sensation of a thousand tiny legs skittering across every inch of my body. Cockroaches swarmed over me, their hard shells and long feelers brushing my tanned arms, my flat stomach, the curve of my enhanced breasts where the ‘Public Cum Dump’ tattoo peeked from under the thin blanket. They burrowed deeper, probing into the raw, aching folds of my pussy, slipping past the swollen labia with their flesh tunnels glinting in the low light, and worming into my ass, where the stretched ring still throbbed from the day’s abuses. More of them raced over my shaved head, their antennae tickling the sensitive scalp, and clustered around my eyes, forcing me to blink frantically as if they might crawl under my lids.

A scream tore from my throat, raw and piercing, shattering the quiet hum of the barn dorm. I flung myself off the cot, the blanket tangling around my legs as I hit the straw-covered floor on my hands and knees, naked body exposed and trembling. My hands slapped at my skin, nails scraping in desperate arcs to dislodge the invaders—flicking at my thighs where I swore I felt them tunneling deeper, smearing away the phantom clusters on my chest that made my nipple piercings jiggle with each frantic motion. ‘Get off me! Get the fuck off!’ I shrieked, twisting and rolling, my forked tongue lolling out as I gasped for air.

The dormitory came into focus then, a long, low-ceilinged space in the barn with rows of simple cots lined against the wooden walls, lit by a few hanging lanterns that cast flickering shadows. About twenty women occupied the space, diverse faces from Latina to Black to white, some curled under blankets looking weary, others sitting up now, eyes wide with alarm at my outburst. I was clean, at least; no crust of cum or piss clung to me, my body washed of the filth from the gangbang, although nothing could wash the filth from my soul. Maria stood closest, her elderly frame sturdy in a faded dress, hands raised in a soothing gesture, while the others stared, their expressions a mix of concern and wariness.

But the cockroaches didn’t stop; they skittered away into the corners of my vision, dark blurs darting behind the cots and under the floorboards. Demons flitted in the shadows too—horned shapes with glowing eyes, leering from the rafters, their laughter a low, mocking echo that bounced in my skull: Worthless slut. Animal whore. Filthy cum rag. The voices slithered from everywhere and nowhere, curling around my thoughts like smoke. I spun on my heels, bald head whipping side to side, searching for the source, my clitoral hood piercing catching the air with a faint whistle. ‘Who’s saying that? Who the fuck is laughing at me?’

The women remained silent, frozen in place, but their eyes bored into me—judging, condemning, I was sure of it. Accusations twisted their faces in my mind, whispers of freak and disgusting hanging unspoken in the air. Rage boiled up, hot and unfiltered, twisting my paranoia into a blade. ‘Fuck you all!’ I yelled, voice cracking as I staggered forward, pointing a trembling finger at the group. ‘If you have anything to say, come say it to my face! You think I’m a joke? You think I’m nothing?’ Snickering laughter bubbled up again, insidious and close, and I whirled around, catching a glimpse of someone—a young woman with dark curls—covering her mouth with her hand, her shoulders shaking.

‘Was it you? Were you laughing at me?’ I lunged at her, grabbing her arm with clawed fingers, yanking her toward me. She yelped in surprise, pulling back, but I held on, my naked body pressing close, the heat of her fear mirroring my own frenzy. ‘Say it! Admit you’re judging me, you bitches!’ No one moved to stop me at first; they just watched, innocent faces etched with shock, but in my fracturing mind, they were all in on it, a circle of silent tormentors feeding the demons that danced at the edges of the room. I wasn’t aware of the drugs’ grip, the psychotic break splintering my reality—only the overwhelming certainty that the world conspired against me, that every shadow hid a crawler, every glance a curse.