Chapter 7

Myself, I thought it looked sexy as hell, but kept my thoughts to myself. That was a wise thing because my thoughts were filled with impure notions about my mother. After a day of Mom bouncing around the house in denim shorts and a blue halter top that left a considerable amount of breast flesh exposed, for the first time in my life, I jacked off to fantasies of my mother before falling asleep. I felt both aroused and guilty -- stunned by the intensity of the feelings Mom was provoking in me unlike any woman or girl had done before.

I don’t know if Mom sensed it, but it seemed to me as if there was some kind of sexual tension building between us. My formerly conservative and reserved mother was now flirty and affectionate, rarely passing up an opportunity to offer me a hug or a kiss on the cheek or the corner of my mouth, giving me those glances that seemed to say so much in themselves and that of themselves seemed to be so naughty.

Tensions were also building between Mom and Dad. I didn’t understand it at first, just sensing that Dad was continuing to hold himself apart. I knew he was unhappy with her new style of dressing, fussing that even her dresses for church were too provocative, let alone what Mom wore around me. His fussing whispers became a common occurrence.