Chapter 4: Forced observer

Tom has to suffer to see Lucia enjoying herself with Stephen.

After my meeting with Stephen, I spent the whole day racking my brains over what he was forcing me to do.

I was not only worried about what it entailed but also about how to achieve it. Lucia had always been fairly conservative and unadventurous about sex. Although we enjoyed it immensely, the truth was that we had tried few new things and nothing too daring. I didn’t know how to convince her to have a threesome with Stephen. It was not only a terribly unpleasant task for me but also very difficult to accomplish.

Finally, I went home that day without a clear idea, only with the idea that I had to do it little by little.

I got home before Lucia and set about preparing dinner. Although my cooking skills were nowhere near Lucia’s, I was capable of preparing some very worthy dishes. While I was preparing an oven-roasted sea bass with potatoes and peppers, I kept contemplating how to present Lucia with the making of a threesome.

When she arrived, I had the whole dinner ready on the table. She savoured it and praised how well it had turned out, as we commented on our respective days. She was delighted to have been able to diagnose a rare disease that one of her younger patients had. I said little and got out of the way with generalities.

After dinner, we sat down to read and listen to music. Lucia had inherited from her parents and grandparents a taste for songs from Italy and Spain from the 50s and 60s, songs that I had learnt to enjoy as well and that I automatically associated with Lucia if I happened to hear them: Italian musicians like Renato Carosone, Domenico Modugno or Rita Pavone or Spanish musicians like Los Panchos, Maria Dolores Pradera or Antonio Machin.

I thought that was the best mood to talk to Lucia, so I plucked up the courage and took the plunge.

As usual, she was lying on the sofa, her head resting on a cushion in my lap, while we both read; in that position I used to stroke her hair with my left hand. I hesitantly began, “You know, honey...”

“Yes?”

“I’ve been thinking...”

“On what?” she asked, setting the book down on her lap and looking at me intrigued.

“You see, I’ve been having this erection problem lately.”

“Don’t worry, honey, it’ll pass. It doesn’t matter.”

“I was thinking about a sexual fantasy I’ve had for a long time, which, now that I have this problem, we could consider fulfilling,” I said, still circling the conversation without deciding to say things clearly.

“What’s it about? If that fantasy helps you get well and get over the problem, I’m in.”

“It’s about having a threesome with another man.”

“What?” exclaimed Lucia, very surprised.

I launched into an argument before she interrupted me, “You see, you’ve been through a bad time, and now you feel strong and lively and sexually aroused. I know this not only because of your dreams, which you’ve had many nights even if you don’t remember them, but also because one day at least I heard you masturbating with the vibrator.”

“Oh! I’m sorry, lately I’ve been feeling very alive and very aroused, but it doesn’t mean that I’m displeased with you or that you don’t satisfy me or...” exclaimed Lucia, turning red.

I quickly interrupted her to continue my argument, “Of course, don’t worry, I understand. But the thing is, maybe you need something more, which I can’t give you right now. A threesome with another man could provide that component of sex that your body is asking for. I would be there too, and besides, maybe the excitement of the moment would help me too. It sounds like a hot fantasy to me.”

“I don’t know, Tom. I don’t see myself having sex with another man. I just want you.”

“But I’d be there. It could be an exciting experience for both of us,” I encouraged her.

“I think you’re only asking because of your erection problems. Don’t worry, I don’t need another cock; I love yours,” she said playfully, slipping her hand down my pants.

“I know,” I replied. “I’m just proposing a new game. It’s nice to try new things.”

“I’m not excited about it, Tom. I don’t like the idea, but I’ll think about it.”

“All right,” I said to close the conversation. I didn’t know whether to be relieved or worried that she didn’t want to include a third party in the sexual relations. I certainly didn’t want to at all, but I had the ‘sword of Damocles’ of Stephen’s threat hanging over my head. I decided I would try another day.

The next night I would bring it up again, and the next, always getting a refusal from Lucia, not an outright refusal but just that ‘she would think about it’. I watched the week go by and became increasingly worried that Stephen would carry out his threat. On Friday afternoon I called Stephen at his office and told him that I had not yet managed to convince Lucia and to please give me another week. I was surprised that he said it was no problem on his part, as he was always pressuring me.

Finally, on Friday night it was Lucia who brought up the subject: “Tom, I’ve been thinking about what you said about the threesome. I had a lot of doubts, and I’ve discussed it with Stephen.”

Hearing Stephen’s name made my hair stand on end. Had she consulted Stephen about it? I hadn’t yet said who I was going to propose for the threesome. Did she trust Stephen enough to talk about such intimate matters? What would he have told her?

Lucia was still talking, so I paid attention to her. “ ... and then he told me that, in addition to the reasons we already know, maybe part of your problem was because you were afraid of hurting me if we had penetrative sex, and that blocked you from getting an erection, but that maybe seeing me having sex with another man could confirm that there was nothing wrong with me and that you could have sex with me without any problems or harming me. So, even though I’m not too keen on it myself, if it can work for you, I’m all for trying it.”

“So, you’re okay with it?” I asked hesitantly.

“Yes. The truth is that I must confess something to you: although, if I think about it coldly, the idea of being with another man doesn’t appeal to me, lately I’ve been thinking about it, and, I don’t know why, the idea excites me. I even dreamt the other night that I was in bed with you and another man, and I woke up with my hand between my legs and totally soaking wet, so maybe I’m attracted to the idea, but I reject it because it doesn’t feel right.”