Chapter 3: Powerlessness

Tom feels powerless, both sexually and in stopping Stephen’s plans

On Sunday afternoon after our dinner on Friday, Stephen came home to have coffee. When Lucia opened the door, she was surprised, but Stephen said I had invited him. I thought about denying it, but a threatening look and gesture from Stephen made me desist, and I finally said I had forgotten.

When Lucia was not present, Stephen told me that he had come to remind me that I had forgotten to video call him and take my medicine. He forced me to take it then and there and forced me to set an alarm on my mobile. He threatened to tell Lucia everything if I didn’t obey him to the letter.

As Lucia couldn’t drink alcohol because of her medication, Stephen had brought a box of chocolates, which excited Lucia, a sweet tooth and chocolate lover. I again had to bear the presence of Stephen, who was hypocritically very friendly and flattering, especially with Lucia. Before leaving, Stephen made an appointment with Lucia for the next day to start her personal medical follow-up.

That Monday Lucia’s medical leave was over, and that afternoon, she was in high spirits and eager to get back to work and look after ‘her kids’ again.

The next day, at lunchtime, Lucia came to my office. She was very happy to be working at the hospital again and to see the condition of some of her old patients and meet the new ones. She also told me that she had been reviewing her recovery with Stephen, who had told her that she was doing very well, and to speed up her recovery, he had given her ‘a new and powerful drug that his father’s laboratory was going to market next month’.

When she showed me the bottle, I quickly realised that it was the failed drug that Stephen had told me about, which they had not been able to sell because of the great sexual arousal it caused as a side effect. I was very tempted to tell Lucia the whole truth, but I didn’t dare for fear of Stephen’s reprisals. I couldn’t ruin her career, and I couldn’t lose her.

During the week I continued to notice how my impotence remained, and I was unable to achieve an erection or an orgasm no matter how hard I tried. For his part, Stephen became a regular at the house, appearing with the excuse that I had invited him or just saying that he was passing by and wanted to pay us a visit.

In the evenings at home, I started to notice Lucia was much more affectionate. She would cling to me while we were reading, listening to music or watching TV.

One night I was awakened by her moans. She was clearly having an erotic dream. She had her eyes closed and her mouth half open, through which she was panting rapidly. Her right hand was tucked under the sheets and was clearly caressing her sex, probably with her slender fingers inserted into her vagina, while her left hand was vigorously massaging her breasts, which were uncovered as she had pulled up the T-shirt she slept in. It was an exciting and beautiful image, which quickened my pulse and made me aroused and wanting to make love to her, but my body was not responding, only my mind. I kept watching as her breathing quickened, as her chest rose and fell as she moaned and gasped louder and louder. Lucia began to speed up the movement of her hands and to murmur in her sleep, “Yes ... Fuck me ... Put your cock in me ... I need a cock inside me ... Fuck me...”

I feared that she might be dreaming of Stephen and that those words were directed at him. A weight was on my heart as I watched her, and jealousy began to undermine me. Before long, she stiffened, her body arched as she climaxed, and she let out a choked howl and cried out, “Tom ... Tom ... Yes ... Like this...” and after a few seconds, she added, “I love you, Tom.” Then I felt like the happiest man in the world. I watched her relax, hugged her tenderly and fell asleep again.

The dreams repeated themselves more and more frequently. Finally, on Saturday night, after we went to bed, Lucia started caressing my face and said, “You know, I had an erotic dream the other night. Besides, this week I’m feeling more alive than ever. I’ve seen death looming over me, and I think I feel more like living now. I feel like making love to you. My body is demanding sex.”

Knowing that I would not be able to respond, and also because the period they recommended to avoid problems with scarring or rejection had not yet passed, I tried to delay the sex she was asking for: “But the deadline has not yet passed. You could have problems. I wouldn’t want you to recklessly have rejection or haemorrhage.”

“I have read the studies and statistics on the subject, and the time limits in our hospital are among the longest. In other places they allow for resuming sexual activity earlier. They even recommend it because sex speeds up the metabolism and helps recovery.”

“I don’t know; I think we should wait longer,” I argued.

“I can’t wait any longer, Tom; I need you,” Lucia replied in a voice of lust.

Cornered, I finally proposed, “Let’s do one thing. So that there won’t be penetration, I’ll use my mouth.”

“Well, great. I love the way you make me cum with your mouth, although these days I think I need a cock to fuck me; I need to feel full. But if you’ll just stay a little more relaxed...”

“Yes,” I answered her, at the same time thinking that Lucia didn’t usually speak so openly. She was always more shy and talked about ‘making love’. The drug was certainly turning her on and disinhibiting her in a way I had never seen her before.