A Healing Love
Copyright© 2025 by Marc Nobbs
Chapter 32: Vulnerable
Coming of Age Sex Story: Chapter 32: Vulnerable - Paul Robertson's journey continues as his past and present collide at a star-studded movie premiere, where a connection that once terrified him reignites with passion that threatens to consume them both. Fighting to forge a new future for himself and stop drifting, Paul must finally become the man he’s always been afraid to be. A beautiful, bittersweet exploration of grief, social responsibility, the healing power of love, and learning that sometimes loving someone means letting them go.
Caution: This Coming of Age Sex Story contains strong sexual content, including Ma/Fa Consensual Romantic Heterosexual Fiction
Lexi smiled and nodded back at me. Then she turned to her right to greet Henry, who had joined her on stage. She shook his hand, and they started talking. The applause had died away, and Lana sat down next to me.
“Wasn’t she brilliant? Didn’t you think she was brilliant, Paul?”
I turned my head to look at her. “She certainly makes a compelling argument.”
“A compelling argument? That’s it? She’s telling it like it is, Paul. No one else does.”
I shrugged. Lana was right. Lexi was ‘telling it like it was,’ and what she’d said made a lot of sense. She’d provided more than enough evidence to make it extremely difficult to argue against her analysis of the problem.
But there would be plenty of people arguing with her solutions.
“You know why she wanted you here, don’t you?”
I nodded. “I’ve got a fair idea.”
Lana, being Lana, felt the need to lay it out for me anyway. “Lexi needs a business to run under Alt Cap principles to prove—”
“Alt Cap?”
“Altruistic Capitalism. Keep up, Paul. She needs someone to run their business not just for their own benefit but to benefit society as well.”
“And you think that’s me?”
“Yes, Paul! You’re halfway there already!”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because it’s true! It’s in your nature. You’ve proved that with The Clarissa Trust—”
“The Clarissa Lidd—”
“You still haven’t spoken to Chrissy, have you?”
I shook my head.
“Paul, you need to call her, Paul! The launch is next week, and you need to start working on your speech—”
“Speech? I’m supposed to give a speech?”
She gave me a perfect imitation of Imogen’s ‘That’s a stupid question’ look.
“But I’ve never given a speech in my life!”
“Well, you’d better get used to it because I have a feeling you’ll be giving a lot of speeches in the next few years. Anyway, at the launch next week, you’ll see that Chrissy is branding the award as ‘The Clarissa Award’ and the wider charity as ‘The Clarissa Trust.’ It’s just less of a mouthful than the full name. You should see the branding, Paul. It’s so good. So classy. Anyway, my point is...”
She stopped speaking and looked past me. I turned around to find Lexi standing there. I held my breath. I wasn’t ready for this.
“Paul, mind if I sit? I can’t talk for long—lots of people want a word—but I need to speak to you first.”
I gestured to the empty seat next to me. “Be my guest.”
She smiled and sat down. Why was I intimidated by this woman? She was beautiful, yes, but I was surrounded by beautiful women all the time. And she was intelligent—massively intelligent. But so were Imogen, Emily, Amanda, and even more so Lana, sitting there next to me.
Was it that she was older? No, she wasn’t that much older than me, she’d even said in her speech that we were from the same ‘generation.’ And I was perfectly comfortable interacting with Ben and Amiee, who were probably a few years older still. Perhaps it was because she was my teacher? But I wasn’t intimidated by any of my other teachers.
There was just something about Lexi Bennett ... The casual confidence she’d had while speaking was still radiating off her. This was her domain. She owned this room. Every person here wanted to talk to her, and she knew it.
And yet she’d chosen to speak to me first.
“Paul,” she said, “Thank you for coming. What did you make of my lecture?”
“You make some compelling arguments, apparently,” Lana said before I could respond, her voice dripping with sarcasm. It was peculiar. Lana had behaved like a star-struck teenager during the lecture, but now she didn’t seem intimidated by Lexi at all.
But then, Lexi wasn’t about to ask anything of Lana, was she?
“It’s Alannah, right?” Lexi said, smiling at her. “Alannah Carrington? You were in my first-year elective last semester.”
Lana nodded, now looking intimidated when she realised Lexi knew who she was.
“And if memory serves, you did very well. Third highest marks in the class.”
Lana nodded again. “Well, I did do an Economics A Level, and I got an ‘A,’ so I kinda had a head start.”
Lexi grinned. “That’s smart. Taking an elective that you know you’re going to pass easily. Easy credits. I like that.” She tilted her head to the side. “Do I have you to thank for making sure Paul came this evening?”
Lana nodded. “He’d have come anyway after he promised he would. Paul always keeps his word. But I knew he’d feel more comfortable with someone he knew here.”
Lexi looked back at me. “So, I make a compelling argument, do I? Good. That will make things easier.”
“I meant that you make a compelling argument about the problem, not necessarily the solution.”
“And that’s why I’d like to sit down with you for an hour or so. I’m sure you already know why.” She nodded to Lana. “Bring Miss Carrington. And any other advisors you trust.”
I looked into her eyes. Her stunning, bright blue eyes.
“When and where?”
“I understand you’re a busy young man, so let me know what your schedule is.”
I sighed. Then I took my wallet out of my pocket. Inside, I had one of my new business cards. But I didn’t give her one. I gave her one of Marie’s instead. “Contact my Executive Assistant. She keeps my diary and will set something up.”
She took the card and smiled. “Tell her to expect my call in the morning.”
We nodded at each other again, and then she got up to speak to some other members of her audience. I watched her leave until Lana slapped me on the arm. I turned to scowl at her. “Hey!”
“I can’t believe you did that!”
“Did what?”
“Told her to call Marie—and called her your ‘Executive Assistant.’”
“Well, that’s what she is.”
“That’s not the point!”
“What is the point?”
She shook her head. “Are you ready to go? Lily’s asked me to invite you to dinner this evening. I think she wants to get back into the routine from before Christmas.” She paused. “She’s not the one cooking.”
I shook my head. “I’d love to, but I can’t. I’ve already left Carly alone for too long this evening.”
“She’s not alone, Paul. Imogen and Mark are home, aren’t they?”
I shook my head. “You know what I mean.”
She smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I do. But I had to ask.”
I walked Lana back to her flat, and just as I used to discuss the film we had seen with Hannah while driving home or strolling along the seafront, we talked about Lexi’s lecture as we walked.
“What did you really think of it, Paul? And don’t give me the guarded reply you gave me earlier.”
“It wasn’t a guarded reply. I really do think some of her arguments are compelling. It’s quite clear there’s a problem and that it’s going to get worse unless something is done.”
“It absolutely was guarded, and you know it. It was almost like you felt vulnerable or something, and you were trying to protect yourself. I suppose I understand why, but you don’t need to be guarded with me, Paul. You really don’t.”
“Are you sure? I mean, you know what Lexi’s going to ask of me at this meeting, and there’s a reason she told me to invite you. She can see how enthusiastic you are about her ideas. But neither you nor her are the one putting anything at risk by implementing her ‘solution.’” I made air quotes with my fingers. “If I embrace her ideas, I’d absolutely be risking making Wintersmith vulnerable to market forces, wouldn’t I? Surely either everyone is altruistic, or no one is. If only some are, then they are making themselves vulnerable in a harsh market. Putting themselves at a disadvantage.”
She looked ahead and didn’t answer. It felt like we’d gone a hundred yards before she spoke again, although it was probably a lot less.
“Paul, do you remember what you said to me when you told me about Wintersmith? About why you were starting the company?”
When I didn’t answer straight away, she ploughed on. “You told me that making money was a side-effect of starting the company, not the motivation for starting it. Those are the exact words you used. I remember them very clearly.
“You said that you didn’t need more money—that you already had more than enough to live on for the rest of your life. But you asked what kind of person that would have made you if you had done that. You said that you’d promised yourself, promised Clarissa, that you’d do something good with the money she left you.
“Something good—that’s why you said. You didn’t know what it was when you made that promise, but saving all those jobs you’re saving by investing in whichever company it is you’re investing in, that is something good.
“Do you remember telling me that, Paul?”
I looked at her and nodded. “I remember.”
“So, do you see? Do you see why you are the perfect person to prove that you can run a successful business on Alt Cap principles? The absolute fundamental idea behind it all is that businesses are better if they do something good rather than just make the largest profit they can.”
Now it was my turn to look ahead and remain silent. What Lana was saying was true, wasn’t it? Altruistic Capitalism was merely a sophisticated term for what I was already doing with the Student Homes business. When I first discussed the idea with Chloë, I had told her that I was more interested in providing a good experience for the students I rented to than in making a profit. Wasn’t that precisely what Lexi and Lana were talking about?
“Look at what you’re doing for Kayla,” Lana said, pulling me out of my own head. “You’re not paying for her to make this album to make a massive profit, are you? The profit isn’t important to you. Yes, it’ll be nice if the album makes you money, but that’s just because it means people have bought the album and enjoyed the music. What you actually want is for Kayla to make the best album she can make, and you want to give her the time and space to do that—to take away any pressure her record label might be putting on her to work quickly.”
I looked at her, and my question must have been written all over my face because Lana answered it.
“She calls me sometimes from the studio. Has done ever since I first went to record for her. Sometimes she wants my opinion on a melody or a lyric, but we usually end up talking about you.” She shrugged. Then her eyes opened a little wider, and she said, “She adores you, you know that, right? And she’d give it all up for you if you asked.”
I gave her a half-smile, shook my head and said, “I could never ask her to do that.”
“And she knows that, too. That’s one of the reasons she loves you.” She paused, looking as if she was deciding whether to say what she wanted to say or not. “Paul, you know when she sings ‘Always?’”
I nodded.
“She means it. She means every word.”
“Hi, I’m back,” I called as I entered the house.
“In the kitchen,” Mark called. “And hurry up, will you?”
I took my coat off and hung it up on the hook by the door. “Why do I need to hurry up?” I said as I walked into the kitchen.
“Because she won’t play the songs until you’re here.”
“What songs?” Carly was sitting at the table with Mark, Imogen and Vanessa. I went over to her and bent down to kiss her.
“We haven’t got time for smooching. Tell him so we can hear these songs,” Imogen said.
I looked at my clearly very impatient friend, then back at Carly. “What are they going on about?”
Carly smiled. “I’ve recorded two songs this week, and I’ve got them on CD to play them for you.”
“Oh, excellent.”
“Only she wouldn’t play them for us until you got back,” Vanessa said.
“But he’s here now, so...” Imogen waved her arms towards the CD player on the windowsill.
Carly ignored them, not taking her eyes off mine the entire time. “I’ve actually written five songs since Sunday. Well, Ellie and I have. She’s brilliant. She gets exactly what I want to say. So, we finished five songs, but I really think only two of them are good enough for the album. I’ve recorded one and should have the other one ready by Friday.”
“What about the other three? What are you going to do with them?”
“Hold them in reserve. If we find we don’t have enough material for the album, we’ll come back to them and try to make them better. Or maybe add them to a special edition in a year’s time. Or they might be ‘B’ sides on a single. There are loads we can do with them.”
“Hang on, you said you’d recorded two songs, but then said you’re recording the second one you wrote by Friday.”
She nodded. “After you told me what your lawyer said, I spoke to Harry and Ellie, and we decided to try recording the covers. See what they sound like.” She smiled. “So, I recorded ‘Always.’”
I smiled back. From what Lana had said, it had to have been the one she chose to record first.
“Okay, so ... Let’s hear them.”
“Hang on,” Imogen said, unlocking her phone. “I need to get Chloë on the line.”
I stared at her. “Really?”
She nodded. “I told her in the chat that Carly had two songs to play for us, and she told me to call her when she does. She wants to hear them, too.”
“Won’t she be in the middle of a meeting or something? What time is it in LA?”
“They’re eight hours behind or something,” Mark said. “So, she’s probably having lunch.”
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