Chapter 25

It was late in spring, the heat making mid-day a good time to have a job with AC. It was purely by chance I ran into Terri and heard what no man wants to hear about a girl, or girls, he had hoped to be his own. Not sure why Terri came clean with me. Said she felt guilty for what happened between me and Fern. Or, put more correctly, what never came about with me and Fern. More likely Terri just needed someone to talk to. A shoulder to cry on and a trusted other who could listen without too much condemnation. She knew I was good for that. After all, I was such a nice, sweet guy.

I’d passed Terri in a big-box store and had to stop and talk. I’d tried texting every couple of weeks from the time Fern dropped me in December but I never got much of a reply. With Terri trapped in front of me in the pharmaceuticals aisle, I got her to talk for a few minutes. Mostly about nothing, but then just out of habit I asked if she’d like to go out some time. You know, coffee, lunch, maybe a quick fuck. Didn’t say that, but it goes through guys’ heads all the time. She declined, knowing full well what was going through my head, but two hours later she messaged and told me to come by her place. I was there in five minutes, without any vodka but with a dick ready to grow hard and hot at her command.

I played it cool with a simple hug and a few minutes of light talk, and that’s when the hammer hit. Simple, with an apology and a smile and a wish for better times, but the hammer sure came down hard on me. I thought I’d been such a player. What an idiot. I’ll let Terri’s low-key but eye-popping words tell the story.

“Don’t know why I’m telling you this, Louis,” Terri said, sitting on a chair opposite the couch I was in. I was hoping she’d sit next to me, her signature tight shorts showing off her firm white thighs and her top cut just low enough to make clear her chest was growing worthy of more than just being gawked at by high school kids.

Just to remind you of what a sex-addicted deviant I was, when Terri sat on the chair opposite me my focus moved from her chest to her very fine thighs. More than her thighs, I was very conscious of how her shorts moved into her crotch, providing me with a clear if cloth-covered view of her thickening lower lips. I was imagining what her clit was like and if the taste of her tweeny cunt had changed any. Then my head was blown apart by her next sentence.

“Just to let you know, Fern’s gone. Her and her dad. Mostly Lonnie’s fault.”

I let out a few choice curses upon hearing Terri say this, but then I noticed that she’d grown smaller, hugging herself and rocking back and forth in her chair before whispering out what turned out to be a confession.

“No. Fuck that. It was her dad and me. Lonnie was just a randy cock used by Fern to get at us. Still, I hate Lonnie and everything he did to us. I know you knew him. Fern mentioned she ran into you at a party she and Lonnie were at. Asshole dude got too greedy and when he came right out and kidnapped Fern for a week, the dad just decided to cut ties with this place and move elsewhere. Hope its not permanent. I’ve gotten messages from him but not her. I’m hoping she’ll come back to me, but her dad’s taken away her phone. Just hope we can start over from the beginning, if that’s even possible. Just thought you should know.”

My mind imploded, too many thoughts filling my head, all being brought out from the darkness from the few insane words Terri had just thrown at me. I thought I was over Fern, but hearing Terri talk about her reminded me of our first meeting, hardly a year before, and all of my futile attempts to get Fern to pay some attention to me. And then came Lonnie, damn the man’s black soul. It had to be Lonnie, a man with no sense of concern when it came to anything outside of his own selfish arena of interest.

I finally shook my head clear of the thousand and one thoughts filling my head and focused on the one clear fact Terri had brought up.

“Wait. Kidnapped? I knew Lonnie was crud, but didn’t hear about the kidnapping. What’s up with that? And Fern was already with him when I ran into her, and that was months ago. Yeah, I hate him too, but they seemed pretty solid. Why kidnapping?”

“Oh, yeah,” replied Terri, hardly giving my face a glance as she bored a hole in the floor with her eyes. “That’s how Mr. J and I refer to it. I’m sure Fern was a part of it, maybe even talking Lonnie into it, riding off with him for a week just to get her dad’s and my attention. I like to think she didn’t like Lonnie so much as see him as a way out. Can’t explain it all. She wanted out from under her dad’s control, but she also hated the idea that she was being replaced. By me. Can you believe it? Jesus but I screwed stuff up so bad.

“I don’t think Lonnie cared what happened to Fern. Sure got his money’s worth, so to speak, in all the ways Fern could be used. But I also know she had plenty of fun on her own. When her dad decided she was straying too far, he tried pulling back on the rope and she rebelled and disappeared with Lonnie. Only reason her dad didn’t call the police is because she texted a few times and, well, personal stuff Mr. J didn’t want to talk to anybody else about.”

I tried to act cool but I was roiling inside. Lonnie? Total trash, so I wasn’t surprised, but hearing that Fern was capable of running away with the guy really blew my head apart. But who the hell was Mr. J? And how was any of Terri’s fault? So much of what Terri was throwing at me just didn’t make any sense.

“Mr. J? Who’s that?”

Terri’s face turned toward the wall, her eyes looking miles into a horizon I couldn’t see. She took a couple of breaths before turning to look me straight in the face.

“You’re not supposed to know this. Nobody’s supposed to know. None of your business, but I’ve never told anyone before. Not many people other than you even knew that Fern and I were a couple. Thought that was forever, but everything’s gone to shit.

“Now that Fern is gone, taken away from me, it’ll be nice to air it out. Not everything. I don’t know or understand everything. But maybe I owe it to you to give a rundown on what happened. I’m sorry you got dragged into this, but don’t go asking for more than I’m willing to give. I just want to talk it out a bit. You know, get some finality to it. Can you understand?”

I wasn’t sure what Terri was talking about, but a nod of my head opened up a whole new appreciation for just how clueless I could be about the world around me.

“I haven’t really known Fern all that long,” she began, Terri’s eyes focusing more on the wall than on me. “Fern and her dad had moved into the area just that fall a couple years ago, when we were both in the 9^th grade. I knew from the first she was my one and only, my Ferny baby. She seemed real shy at first, and even I was new to all those feelings of love for the girl.

“After a couple of months of being just friends I threw myself over a cliff and kissed her. It was the most magical thing ever in my life. I wish I could relive just that. It was made more special when she kissed back, and just the following weekend we slept together, like connected all night. I never wanted to leave my bedroom. She was everything to me.”

I nodded, already aware that Terri had feelings for Fern. Lesbians and bi-girls and gay guys seemed to be a fad when I was going to school and nothing Terri said surprised me. I was smart to just nod and let Terri talk it out.

“More than anything I wanted to spend every day and night with her, but Fern’s dad refused to let her out of the house for anything but school or the one night a week she could stay with me. I wanted to spend nights at her place but she refused, always blaming some rule her dad made up. Still, for a couple of months it worked and I was more than happy. I’d met my soul mate, my love for life, and nothing could be better.

“Then one night she whispered into my ear how good it was and how different love was with a girl. That was nice, but it also sounded like she was comparing me to some guy she used to be with and I asked her about it. Fern kind of shrugged and admitted that she was still seeing a man. She loved me but she couldn’t leave this guy and she hoped I’d understand and not hate her. It was a shock, like a bolt from the blue, and sure I felt hurt and even betrayed, but she always came first for me. At worst I thought Fern had a crush on some senior at school and that she’d leave me for him. Shit. Wish it had been that simple.”

When Terri had gotten this far in her story I felt the need to shake my head and ask a few hundred questions, but knew better than to interrupt while she was in the mood to talk. So I got up and sat in the chair next to her, reaching out to hold her hand and silently tell her to continue.

“So, my Fernanda was having an affair with some guy. That was a slap to the head. I wanted the whole story, like who he was and everything, but she wouldn’t say more. After a few days I got angry and cried and everything, and that’s when Fern said that if I came over and spent the night at her place then she’d be able to tell me. Then she leaned into me and began crying, begging me not to hate her and to always love her. How could I not love her? She was everything to me. I was only afraid of her leaving.

“The next night I went over, excited about finally spending the night in her house and getting all the details about the other half of her love life. We were still just 14, so all I was expecting was a crush with a neighborhood boy.

“Her dad was cool, allowing us to hang out and be together most of the day. We’d eaten dinner and done some stuff and finally went back to her bedroom. We were ready for bed, just starting to melt into the other’s arms, when her dad suddenly walked in. He sat on the bed, looked at me and her, and then held Fern’s hand and asked if she was sure. She looked at me, asked me again if I really loved her, and started to take off her pajamas. Like, right there in front of her dad, getting totally naked except for her panties. When he stood and started to do the same, I just backed up into a corner, like the far edge of her bed, and watched like I’d been drawn into some alternate reality.

“I saw what was happening, even heard myself ask out loud what Fern was doing, but I couldn’t really accept that it was for real. A naked Fern, sure, she was the most beautiful person in the world to me, but then there was a naked man standing next to her.

“That wasn’t the first time in my life I’d been in the same room with a real naked guy. I think I told you I’d had a boyfriend a year before. It was like two minutes after I’d turned fourteen. Brother of a friend down the street made a move on me. It was exciting, this big older guy kissing me and feeling me up. Within a week he had me visiting every day, showing me in vivid detail all the different things boys and girl could do with one another when all the adults are gone.

“Maybe if things had gone a little slower things would have turned out different. It was wild and crazy and fun for a couple of months. Really good. Then the asshole tried talking me into giving favors to some of his friends. One friend was bad enough, but then more started showing up. That was it for me. Didn’t give up on boys but no way could I do everything my so-called boyfriend wanted me to participate in.

“That’s when Fern walked through the door and changed my life forever. She showed me that boys weren’t necessary. She became everything and I thought I’d never need to see another dick for the rest of my life. And then her father entered her bedroom and dropped his shorts.”

My brain exploded on hearing these crazy words coming from Terri’s mouth and I burst out of my polite and caring semblance to blurt, “What? Her father? Are you sure?”

Terri looked over at me, her fingers clasping my own hand in a tight grip.

“Yeah. I mean, they looked a lot alike, and he acted just like a dad would every time I’d been over there. Kind of weird, though. Sometimes she’d throw out the name Jesse at him and sometimes call him daddy. Yeah. Daddy. Right there, in the room with me scrunched up in the corner. There she was, naked and sitting on the bed, her dad standing in front of her, wrapping her legs around his hips and calling him daddy.

“I watched as he kneeled on the floor and pushed his face between her legs. I could taste what he was tasting, kind of jealous, thinking Fern was only for me. Then he moved up, sucking on her breasts, just like I did when we were together. But then he stood up and wrapped his hands around her butt and pulled her into his crotch. Worse was that Fern was helping him, like opening her knees and pushing her hips up. I couldn’t believe it when her dad began rubbing the tip of his dick up and down between her thighs, and then I saw his dick move inside of her. That was crazy, like this big long black thing disappearing into her. I was afraid for Fern, but it just made her excited. As he started up in her she kind of mewed, like a cat, even moving her butt up to help him push in. Did that for a minute, just a slow back and forth. Then he pulled out, all the way, his dick all wet.

“I was a mental mess, Fern’s dad fucking her right there in front of me, but Fern actually whined a little when he pulled out and told him not to stop. He made her sit up and suck on it, his wet dick, and then he rolled her over and pushed back into her. All the way this time, this long thing just disappearing into Fern until his balls pushed into her ass. That’s when I saw for the first time a real fuck, where a man really fucks a girl. It must have lasted five minutes. Like a lifetime to me. In the middle of it Fern reached out to grab my hand and then pulled on my foot, pulling my leg out so she could rest her head on my thigh while her dad continued to pound into her butt.

“It got really loud. I didn’t know sex could be so loud. Makes me blush to think of what I did with my boyfriend when his friends were all watching. I mean, Fern and I kept it real quiet when we were at my house. I was always really afraid of my mom and dad thinking we were anything but friends from school. This thing with Fern and her did was totally the opposite. They were both moaning, the bed was moving against the wall, and then there was the slapping of his crotch into Fern. And the wetness. Fern was always wet but I liked to think it was all for me. I’d thought all of her body was only for me, but this thing with her dad sure showed me different.

“I could hear the two of them, just the wet slurping sounds of her dad moving in and out of her. Then Fern let out some yelps and grunts and she bit me, my leg. I was kind of afraid for her and put my hand out to her, but she was just having an orgasm. Right there in front of me, an orgasm while her dad was doing it to her. And then him, like a loud groan and stuff and he collapsed onto Fern’s back. They wound up crushed in a pile, pushed against my body, both of them with their heads on my lap. It was so surreal. It was like I was watching me and my boyfriend when we’d go wild, but this was so different because it was Fern. My Fern having real sex with her dad, and right there in front of me. I swear I almost fainted from hyperventilating. It was crazy.

“Anyway, that was it. Most of it, anyway. They finally rolled off my lap. Fern said something to her dad and he got up to leave, but then he kissed her and they cuddled before he pulled her head into his crotch. She sucked him a long time, and not on the lips. I mean, sucked on his wet dick. She really got into it. Turned out that she really enjoyed that part, sucking. Even swallowing. Not something I’ve ever liked, except with Fern. Then she told him she wanted to talk with me. As he left, the dad looked right at me, naked and his dick standing straight up, and said he’d understand if I wanted to go home and that he’d drive me. Then he walked out and it was just me and Fern.

“I was astounded, shaking and my mouth open and not knowing what to think. Fern moved over to me on her bed and took my hand and began crying, asking me if I hated her. I shook my head and even kissed her hand, but I didn’t really know what I thought. It was too much to handle.

“She was on the bed next to me but with her legs out, and when I glanced down at her open crotch I saw a bunch of white stuff on her thighs and between her legs. Reminded me of my own past but this wasn’t some boy from school she was having fun with. This was her dad’s cum, leaking out from inside of my Fern. I reached out to touch it, to touch a place I thought was special just for me, and Fern totally blew my mind when she held my hand there, like cupped against her lips, and asked, ‘Can you still love me? Will you taste me?’

“How could I say no? It was that or turn my back on her. We’d done it all before at my place, everything she and her dad had done. Well, almost, but you get the idea. Thing was, that time she’d just fucked a grown man, fucked her own father, so everything was different.

“She held me and we cried together and we talked and touched and made love. She’d kiss me and tell me how special her dad was and I’d kiss her and try to understand. More than anything I wanted to love Fern and have her love me back, but of course it wasn’t quite the same.

“To tell the truth, I really didn’t mind the whole father-daughter thing. I just didn’t like Fern loving someone else. It took me a long time to get over that. Then I also hated the way her taste changed. To me, when we were alone at my house, she was delicious, but having a man’s cum inside of her changed everything. Her dad’s cum always ruined her for me. She didn’t mind, though. Later on that night, she said he tasted even better after he’d finished inside of me. Didn’t seem to matter to Fern, straight from her dad or out of me, she liked the taste of a guy’s cum. Even Lonnie’s, if you can believe it.”

Somehow, with all of the crazy but very stimulating details Terri was throwing at me, I found some way to make it all about me.

I got up and walked across the room a few times, throwing out random questions, but then got real animated and stood right in front of Terri when asking why the hell she’d had me date Fern. Total nonsense, a waste of my time and money, and they both knew it. I felt like a fool, and all Terri could do is give a shrug and a smile.

“You and Fern, I get that. You told me you and Fern were like a couple. But this thing with her father is messed up. And it’s been going on for what, two years? And you and Fern and the dad and everything. That was going on at the same time we had that party with the other girls at your place?”

Terri finally looked my way, giving her cynical kind of half-smile and nodded.

“And nobody else knew? None of those girls? Even when you and Fern were both doing it with her dad?”

“Yeah,” she replied. “We were kind of smart enough to know the rest of the world would end it all in a second if it ever got out.”

“So why go out with me in the first place? If Fern was with you and getting it from her dad, why mess with my head?”

“Because she was interested in getting out from under her father. She was kind of like me, interested in guys in general while being in love with me in particular. She didn’t want to leave her dad, but she kind of liked you. When you two obviously showed some interest in one another, I lied to Mr. J about her and me going out while we were really seeing you.”

“Mr. J? Who’s he? And why did you tell me right out front to go slow and not even touch the girl. Fern was screwing her father every night and you wouldn’t let me feel her tits after that party at your place.”

“Yeah, watch me cry for you all the way to Sandy’s bedroom. We all knew what you two were up to. You’ve been screwing Sandy every day, twice on Sunday. Fern’s even joked that you could give her dad and Lonnie both a run for their money.”

“After Fern dumped me,” I retorted, though not without a burn rising to my cheeks. “Wouldn’t have moved on Sandy if Fern had done more than just hold my hand. Like you said yourself, Sandy was a known slut. If Fern was up for seeing guys other than her father, why’d she treat me like I was nothing? And who was this Mr. J guy?”

“Mr. J is just what I started calling Fern’s dad. She called him dad or daddy or even sometimes Jesse, but I just called him Mr. J. And I told you to go slow with Fern because I was still kind of jealous of her, like not wanting her to leave me for someone else.

“She started off slow. She’d been daddy’s girl, then my lover, and even thinking of going out with another boy was a big step for her. Didn’t make me happy, but she was feeling tied down by her dad. When she shared her secret desire to date a boy with me I wasn’t happy. It was crazy enough sharing Fern with her father, but at least it kept her at home. Her wanting to leave the house and date was something her father would never allow, which is probably why she wanted it so bad. I hated it, but there’s no stopping Fern when she’s got her mind made up.”

“And why me?” I repeated, feeling that I’d been left out of the best if most illicit sex the city had ever known. “Or better yet, why not me? Why not shove her into my bedroom and tell me to nail Fern to my bed? Instead you insisted on a do not touch policy? What the fuck?”

“Looking back now that would have been the way to go. If you’d dragged me and Fern into my bedroom, that day at the party, and put all your lust into us instead of Sandy, maybe we’d all have been better off. Maybe. By that time, Fern had been exclusive with her dad for more than a year, and I’d been with them as the man’s extra girl and Fern’s experimental lover for maybe eight months. Yeah, having you come in and introduce something different would have been good for her, but it wasn’t that easy. Dad was controlling, I was jealous, and Fern’s head totally messed up and unsure about everything going on around her. Even now it’s all messing with my mind. I can only say ‘sorry’ so many times.”

That shut me up. I could see that Terri was trembling, the effort of talking all this out taking a real toll on her. I still had a thousand questions, but I shoved them aside. Sitting down by Terri, I put a hand out to her arm and tried to show some empathy.

“Hey. It’s okay. I’m pissed, but like you I’m more worried about Fern. Sorry you had to go though all of that just so you and her could share the same bed. Did you at least get to hold hands at school?”

This got Terri to smile.

“Ha. Yeah. Mr. J actually encouraged us to explore our lesbian side. Totally self-serving of course. Hoped that if we acted out our love for one another at school then the guys would leave us alone. He didn’t mind at all when Fern and I got into it with him on the side of the bed either. He’d get it up, screw one of us, let us go at one another until he got hard again, and then he’d empty himself into the other girl. Got to be exhausting. Don’t think we ever got to sleep until after midnight.

I was feeling depressed and a little sorry for myself, but as Terri started talking about sharing Fern with the dad, she actually perked up and I saw her smile and her eyes open up.

“Best times weren’t when we were in bed, though. At Fern’s place, when I stayed the weekend, we’d all walk around and do whatever with one another. And I don’t mean just fuck and stuff. We’d undress one another, kiss and touch and massage and feel and make love in all sorts of ways. And this lasted all day, for two days and nights, just going slow and enjoying one another at a real easy pace. Instead of just an hour or two of fucking at night, we’d spend the entire day on a sensual high.

“Every hour we’d be doing something different, as a twosome or maybe all three of us together. Like Mr. J kneeling next to me when I was at the computer and kissing my thighs or Fern sitting on my lap and having me give her chest some attention while she read me poetry. You know, like all-day foreplay, just enjoying one another’s bodies and voices and thoughts. It was incredible.

“I hated having to go home on a Sunday night. After two days and nights of being with Fern and her dad it was nice to have a bed and some privacy, but then I also began to feel alone and left out. My mom worried about me being at Fern’s so much, but it was such a special time. It’s the only time in my life I’ve ever felt free and uninhibited.

“Got to be where I didn’t mind sharing Fern with her dad and came to really enjoy having him give me special attention during the day. I got blinded by my growing feelings for him, though. Should have seen that Fern wasn’t so happy with Mr. J doing things with me. Fern even began insisting that if her dad and me were going to do anything more than kiss or cuddle, then she had to be called over to watch or take a video or even participate. That was fine. I felt the same way about her, but that was only the tip of her iceberg. She wasn’t just afraid of being left out of the fun. She had some real attachment issues. Wish all those had been just for me.

“Yeah. I was totally stupid about it all. I slowly got attached to Mr. J myself, though of course not like Fern was. In my mind, even now, its always been about me and Fern. Whenever I wasn’t at their house I’d kind of miss Mr. J but I’d always yearn for Fern to be at my side. And it was always special having her to myself at my house. Those times were always real special to me.

“Then I started to get ideas and worried that maybe Fern didn’t love me as much as I loved her. When she said she wanted to meet up with guys, I had the suspicion that she pulled me into her bedroom just to placate her father so she could be given permission to date. In so many ways I was sure she loved me and that we were exploring life together, but she had a pretty active imagination and often brought up what we could do if her father weren’t around. Just as often she wondered what kind of love life she could have if her father hadn’t pulled her into his bed.

“You got that? I mean, I know she enjoyed the sex with her dad, her daddy. Kind of sick, but I saw her in action with the man a hundred times and she wasn’t acting. To be honest, neither was I. After I got used to the situation, having a man to share with her got to be a lot of fun. But then she started to look outside the home. I didn’t want her to do that, but I was even more upset that she may have just pulled me into her bed as a distraction for her dad. You know, have me there to take his mind off her and empty his balls into. Kind of true, but not really. Fern was way more complicated than that.

“She loved me. Loved her dad. Just wanted to see some of the outside world. I was worried but went along with the plan. Then everything went to hell.

“I didn’t see it in time. Should have. My fault, but even Mr. J should have known. Her mind got all messed up, no thanks to me, and that was before we had the really bad luck to run into Lonnie. Should have let you screw her that first day we met you. We both knew what was on your mind, coming over with vodka to show some girls how to drink. Hah. She liked the idea but I convinced her to wait. Too bad. Could have gotten drunk, had sex, and we could have made a nice threesome outside of her father’s reach. I think that would have been good for Fern. Instead we took our time, went out with you a few times, and then we ran into Lonnie.”

“Yeah. How did you ever get mixed up with him?”

“Total accident. Hate to tell you this but Fern and me both were thinking of having her go all the way with you. She was interested, I was getting used to the idea of me being alone with her dad while she ran off with some other guys once a week, and if you’d drugged us both and screwed us into your bed instead of taking us to that dumb rom-com movie, none of this would have happened.”

“Yeah. Fuck me for being a nice guy. How did you meet Lonnie?”

“We’d walked over to the store to get something and he just inserted himself into the conversation. Smooth, talking about making soup and asking us to his place for dinner. I thought a polite “No” would end it. Then he walked outside with us, saying that if we weren’t hungry he had some killer smoke at home. Nothing subtle about the man. No way I’d even trust a high school date with a line like that. Then we had this older man pushing us to go home with him even while his fingers were tracing Fern’s ass.

“I was all for saying running for home, but it was beginning to rain and Lonnie said he could drive us home anytime we wanted. I was still shaking my head but Fern was taken with the guy and said yes without even asking me. Looking back on it now, there’s no question Fern knew what she was getting us into. She knew and she wanted it and she wanted to make sure I got the full treatment right there with her.

“It was okay at first. There was a guy waiting for Lonnie in his car and then another guy, like a big tall guy even bigger than Mr. J at the house. Just a trashy house, junk furniture, but warm. Should have known there was going to be trouble. I mean, who the hell glues a dildo to a kitchen chair? Fern and me just laughed. Guess its our fault for not calling her dad for a quick ride home.

“Lonnie never did make us that soup. Not then anyway. We just sat around and drank glasses of coke and rum and passed around a blunt. Like a really cool party for anybody at high school and here we were with three older guys talking about nothing and relaxing.