Chapter 1: Been So Long

I was lying in bed on night, just thinking random thoughts, when it occurred to me that it had been almost a month since my dad had fucked me. Granted there had been a few quickies before church but those are so short and quick they don’t really count. The last couple of times he had fucked me had been with other people involved, including when our friend Tammy visited and then there was the time before that with my aunt and cousin on the 4th of July.

Thus when it came to just me satisfying him as his daughter, it had been ages! It came as sort of a shock to me now that I was actually thinking about it. Since I was sixteen and he had first had sex with me I couldn’t remember a period when we’d gone this long without doing it unless I was away at school or something.

In a way, I guess our “dry spell” wasn’t ALL that bad when considered from his perspective. Since he and my Aunt Linda had gotten closer, they’d been like two teenagers in heat. I think for both of them it was sort of a release to have each other. It wasn’t like they hadn’t been doing it for almost twenty years now, just that now it was different.

Now it was just the two of them and even Kristen and I weren’t included for the most part, at least not that I knew about so far as Kristen goes but then you never know about her sometimes. There was never going to be anything more between them like marriage, both of them was carrying too much baggage for that to happen, but it was nice to see how happy they both were these days when they were together.

As for me, it wasn’t like I was a nun or anything just because my dad wasn’t doing me more regularly. In fact, I’d never depended on my dad to satisfy my sexual needs, nor would I have ever wanted to. Like most girls, I’ve never had to worry about getting laid when I really wanted it although at times it required “lowering the bar” a bit depending on how anxious I was for it at the time. When I first offered myself to my dad it had nothing to do with being horny or needing someone to fuck me. It was then, as it always has been, more about submitting myself to my dad as I have learned that a daughter should to her father.

Now don’t get me started on the difference between loving submission and anything kinky, I wrote an entire article on it that’s posted on my website if you’re interested. Suffice to say I love to please my father and I trust him more than I have any other man. From the first time I saw my parents making love, I knew I wanted a closer relationship with my father that was only possible through sex. Of course it was not the same sex as he had with my mother - and I would never even want to think I was his “lover” or anything weird like that. It’s just that when him inside of me, and I feel him moving in me and then cumming me, it is then I feel closest to my dad, in a way I could never be with him otherwise.

As you can imagine, I was a bit torn and confused as I thought more about this “revelation” I was having. What was I really concerned about? What were my true feelings? Was I becoming jealous of my Aunt Linda for all the time she was spending with my dad - at the expense of him spending it with me? If my true concern was for the happiness and well-being of my father, shouldn’t I be pleased that he was finding satisfaction with a woman he had loved and fucked for most of his life?

Of course I’d never been jealous of my mother - she was his wife after all and he SHOULD enjoy being with her. She had often told me that it never bothered her for him to have sex with me as I was his daughter and it pleased her if anything to see the two of us being so close. Although she didn’t say a lot about it, I knew it also got her off watching the two of us together as she would usually masturbate while she watched.

Then came my Uncle Paul and his startling tales of having sex with my mom for so many years without anyone knowing about it, not even my dad. He even claimed that she went to him when she needed sex because my dad was more interested in me at the time. I still didn’t know whether to believe that last part or not. Was it just Uncle Paul trying to make me believe things about my mother to rationalize what they’d done?

I so wished I could ask her for her side of the story. How often had they really done it? When did it start between them and how? Was she really feeling left out because of all the time my dad was spending with me? I just couldn’t believe that to be honest. She wouldn’t have lied to me all these years about how she was happy for me to be with my dad. Then again, the more I started to parse her words, being happy seeing my dad fucking me didn’t mean she wasn’t feeling left out herself. Was she only telling me half the story?

While I was confused about my mother keeping such a secret for my dad, it really was no different than what I was doing myself. I hadn’t told my dad about his older brother fucking me that day, nor the last time just a few days ago, and I sincerely doubted that he had even the slightest inkling that anything like that was going on between me and my uncle. Was I now carrying on the same as my mother had done? Maybe when she didn’t tell him immediately it just got harder and harder the more they did it until finally she just resolved never to tell her husband. Technically it wasn’t adultery - THAT I could have never believed my mother being capable of. Even though they were related through marriage, making sex between them permissible, emotionally it almost like it just that.

Since I wasn’t married it didn’t matter who I had sex with so far as sinning was concerned and even if I HAD been married, I still would’ve been “OK” with the concept of fucking Uncle Paul since he WAS my uncle. Still, if I HAD been married I would want my husband to know about it since hiding it from him would make it seem like there was something wrong about it or something I was ashamed to admit. So why hadn’t my mother told my dad?

I tossed and turned in my bed, my thought getting more and more jumbled up inside my head. What if she HAD told my dad? There was no reason he needed to tell me about it, especially since he didn’t think I was having sex with Uncle Paul. What if my uncle had been bluffing, maybe to try and keep me from telling my dad about what we had done? Yet if he had been fucking his brother’s wife with his knowledge, why would he think that it would be any more of a concern for his brother to know he’d fucked his only daughter?

So many thoughts ... so many options. Now I started to wonder if maybe Uncle Paul was fucking his own daughters as well. Maybe THAT is why he didn’t want my dad to know he had fucked me, perhaps worried that now he would have to deal with my dad doing his daughters. Being they were both married it would make it more complicated but I’m sure something could be worked out. Both of them had big boobs - something that always drew the attention of my dad, and he had in fact confided in me over the years that he would have loved to have fucked them both. However, knowing his brother wasn’t involved in incest made that pretty well impossible - but WAS he so not involved? There had never been the slightest hint but at the same time, I doubted anyone in our family that wasn’t already included know that my dad was fucking me so maybe it was the same with Uncle Paul and my cousins.