Chapter 2: Dad’s Reaction to My Mom’s Death

After my mother passed away, it was like something was taken from my father that left a hole in him that can never be filled. However, if there was one thing I am certain of more than anything in my life, it is that I will never try to fill that hole. It would be an insult to my mother and eventually I believe it would destroy the relationship I have with my father. All this crap people write about in so-called “erotic” stories about how a girl takes the place of her dead mother to satisfy the needs of her grieving father is just that - crap. I had grown weary of that tired story line but now it angers me when I read something that starts out with, “my mom died...”. It’s just so much crap, pure garbage. If there is a real case where such a thing HAS happened, I think it would be sinful and just plain morally wrong.

At the time of her passing I was living at home. Once the initial grief and shock was over, and life had to start moving on once again, I chose to move back to my old apartment. It just seemed to be the appropriate thing to do. It’s hard to explain, but I wanted to be sure that in some future moment of grief and weakness, that nothing ever happened that would harm the beautiful relationship I shared with my dad. Now, more than ever, I needed my FATHER.

As for dad, over the next few months he had his work to keep him busy. He also had someone else to help him - my mom’s sister Linda. Actually their relationship went back to their high school days (well, 8th grade for her). My dad started dating my mom first as she was a couple of years older than Linda, but Linda eventually got herself involved with him as well. It was just teenage hormones at that time but they grew close over the years as they matured.

Of course, my dad DID marry my mom so you know which sister he truly loved and which one was just for fun, but even after the marriage, they still got together now and then for some casual sex between consenting adults. My mother never interfered because first, she knew who my dad REALLY loved and second, since her sister was part of her immediate marriage family, my dad had the moral right to have sex with her so long as it was consensual, no different than he eventually would with me and my cousin Kristen, Linda’s daughter.

It wasn’t for a few months after my mom’s passing that my dad and Linda got back together again. Actually, neither of them ever discussed it much with me, at least not in any detail. I was only aware of much of what they were doing because she was over at his house a lot and I knew from growing up what THAT meant. Plus, I’d actually seen them doing it a few times when I went in the house unannounced (as I always do). It wasn’t anything they were embarrassed about, just something they didn’t share with me. Well, there WAS one time when my dad discussed it with me, but only to assure me that it was just as it had been before with them - something they both enjoyed and nothing more than that.