Chapter 1: Why I Love Incest

My dad’s 42 years old. While this may sometimes make him seem older than rocks to me, he insists that he doesn’t feel any older now than he did twenty years ago (that is, unless it’s after he mows the lawn or tries to water-ski!) When I turned 22 at my last birthday, it was sort of a milestone in that for the first time I wasn’t less than half his age. I guess that doesn’t really mean much, but it use to be sort of cool to tease him that he liked to fuck a girl less than half his age.

Oh yeah, in case you haven’t read the rest of my diary, my dad has been fucking me since I was sixteen. Before your mind descends into the gutter, he wasn’t my first, not even close. I achieved THAT milestone years before back when I was fourteen. Heck, my dad wasn’t even my first “older” guy as one of the partners from his office did me when I was fifteen. That guy was 45 and married at the time, older than my dad is even now!

Although my dad wasn’t my “first” in any of those times, I have to say that the day he first fucked me remains as the single most memorable and important day in my life (of course, not counting when I accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior). It was on that day, more than any other, that my life changed dramatically in more ways than I can describe.

People have asked me if I ever regret getting involved with incest? My answer has always been, not for even one second. Actually, the only regret I have in that regard is that my dad wasn’t my first. It’s not that physically I would have preferred him to be my first (my boyfriend Steve did a nice job our first time) so much as I feel a deep sense of guilt for denying him a once in a lifetime opportunity - the opportunity to take his own daughter’s virginity. Of course my wonderful dad is always telling me not to feel that way.

Technically I agree that it wasn’t my “fault” as I didn’t have a clue that he wanted me in THAT way when I was younger. I mean, when you see your dad masturbating most every day since you were eight, how are you suppose to know when it starts being about you? Then again, even if it WAS about me at that age, how was I supposed to know? Even so, looking back there were plenty of clues I could have picked up on had I been a little more attentive and less naive

Another thing people always ask me is why I let my dad fuck me in the first place. Well, first and foremost, the obvious answer is like DUH, he IS my dad so isn’t it obvious? First, from an intellectual perspective, as his daughter the Bible commands that I honor him and what better way to demonstrate that respect than to offer myself to him? Don’t get me wrong; saying it’s my “duty” to let my dad fuck me doesn’t mean I allow him to dominate or otherwise force me to submit to him. It’s no different than our “duty” to obey God in that it’s something a person should WANT to do if they truly believe in the principles they claim to live by.

Everyone seems to get confused over the “duty” thing, no matter how many times I try to explain it’s NOT something bad. Sometimes I think maybe I shouldn’t even bring it up but then I believe people should understand that there is an indirect biblical directive which supports incest, although not requiring it per se.Above all, I love my dad and bottom line, I simply enjoy pleasing him. He may be my dad, but he’s also a man and all men have needs and fantasies. My belief, based on personal experience with quite a number of men, is that when guys are really being truthful and open, most admit that either they’ve had lustful thoughts for their teenage daughter or, sans daughters, someone else’s or even girls in their neighborhood. Really, how many guys honestly can honestly claim that they do NOT want to fuck a perky little teenager? Of course, the vast majority never do, out of either commitments to their marriage, or (most likely) fear of the consequences, but that doesn’t mean they don’t fantasize about it.

Of course, it’s not like it’s some kind of chore letting my dad fuck me. I deliberately used the words “let him fuck me” for a couple of reasons. First, because the Bible says so, and second, to please him. I realize that this makes it sound dreadfully submissive and almost abusive. Well don’t forget that I get physical enjoyment as well, even if my dad has reached the age where he can only cum once and sometimes has issues he doesn’t like to talk about (despite the TV commercials). It’s not like I NEED to go to him for my sexual needs. Anyone familiar with my history knows I don’t have much in the way of problems in THAT area of my life. Sure, there have been a few times over the years that I was tired or not feeling well and sex wasn’t exactly my top priority when he wanted it. No matter what, though, it’s become a matter of personal pride for me that I’ve NEVER refused my dad, no matter how I felt or when or how he wanted it.