Chapter 14

I thought letting Kelly sleep was a nice thing to do; boy, was I wrong. She’s not really mad, but she didn’t get the skin-to-skin she thinks I promised. I know enough not to argue; it’s hard to concentrate while she’s standing right in front of me, still in the shorty gown.

“Have I told you how great your legs are?” I try deflecting her. This time it works.

She smiles and twirls around, then bends over and gives me a kiss. “You need to get up and shower, Irene is going to be here in an hour. I’m going to pack my things and go home; you be nice to her.”

This I can promise. I head to the bathroom, shave and shower, then clean up in there. When I get out Kelly is already gone; the bed is still made from yesterday, I just straighten it out. I put on some clean jeans and a t-shirt, make sure the living room is neat, then head for the kitchen. I’m just getting everything out of the frig when I hear steps on the stairs, I open the door for Irene.

“I’m running a little behind; I got home around 5 and just got up,” I tell her. “Make yourself comfortable; do you need a tour?”

“No; Kelly insisted on showing me around last night when I dropped her off. She does like to talk; she told me that casual dress would be best, is this alright?” she says as she spins around. She’s got on form-fitting jeans, sandals, and a slightly loose sweater. The waitress uniforms I’ve always seen her in is designed to be tasteless; this reveals she is really stacked.

“Better than alright, you look great; lots better than I do. The idea is to be comfortable; but I love the tight jeans on you.

She blushes a little. “I hoped you’d like them; I kept going back and forth on what to wear.”

“Again, you look fantastic. Try not to wiggle too much, you don’t want to distract me and make me burn dinner,” I joke.

She laughs a little, “I’ll try.”

I got her a soda to drink, then start on dinner. She asks if she can help; I tell it’s not necessary, I don’t want her to get dirty, peeling shrimp can be messy. I peel the shrimp and prep them, cut some scallops into small pieces, then lay out the other ingredients.

“You’re really going to make this? Kelly said you were; I thought you’d just warm up a frozen dish or something.”

“Kelly was surprised too. I cook a little and like to experiment and try new things; I’ve not tried a seafood lasagna before, but it sounds good. This is pretty easy, you don’t cook the noodles first; just layer everything together, add a little water, cover it and let it cook for an hour.”

She watches me put it together, asks about the cheeses I’m using and the sauce; I show her the bottled Alfredo, the idea is a quick and easy dish. I’ve had the oven pre-heating; I cover the dish and put it in to cook. I wash my hands and start to put a salad together; I let her help. I show her what’s in the frig, and ask her what she’d like in it, and to pick a dressing. We’re working together pretty well, joking and talking about stuff; the kitchen is fairly small and we keep bumping into each other, not accidentally. I have her set the table and get me something to drink; I check the lasagna and say, “So far, so good, it smells okay.” I take a French roll and put it in the oven to cook, it should be done when the pasta is ready. We sit down and start on the salad, chatting some more. I ask her about school and her background, just to get her talking; I know a lot from Kelly, and explain that whatever she’s told Kelly; I probably know. I know she’s not from right here; she explains she’s from about an hour south, her grandparents are paying for college; she’s doing liberal arts for now and not sure if she wants to change her major. I keep her talking, nothing serious; she’s relaxed and enjoying herself; I’m doing good. We finish the salad; I put those dishes in the sink and take out the lasagna and roll. I take the cover off; it looks and smells pretty good; I add some more shredded cheese to the top and put it back in the oven to brown and melt; and slice the bread. I get everything on the table, “Ta daaaa.”

“I’m impressed,” she says, “It smells great.”

“Let’s try it; worst comes to worst, we can always go get pizza,” I joke. It’s turned out pretty good; we have a nice dinner talking about whatever comes to mind, Irene wants to know more about me, and Kelly. I give her my background; moving a lot, not wanting to go to college, not wanting to get married or have kids. She knows how Kelly and I connected; I tell her that if Kelly hadn’t made the first two or three moves, nothing would have happened; I know I’m moving on and don’t know where, and don’t want a permanent, committed relationship. We ended up talking a bunch about that; I can see it’s going to be a topic of discussion for a while. We talk about Kelly and me; about how much of a talker she is and that while I don’t know exactly what she’s said to Irene, I’m assuming that Kelly has told all.

“Kelly doesn’t seem to have any boundaries; if she likes you, whatever is on her mind, you’re going to hear about it,” I explain. “What she thinks, what she feels, what’s happened to her; you’re going to get it all because she considers you a friend. I get a lot of it without ever asking; you’re probably going to get everything. I think she can keep a secret, but I wouldn’t want to bet on it. She confides in me and Chris because we’re friends; whatever you’ve told Kelly, unless you’ve told her specifically it’s a secret, we probably know.”

“She is a talker, and easy to talk to,” Irene states. “She’s so out-going, almost the opposite of you. I’ve been watching you for over a year, you hardly ever talk about yourself.”

“Most of that is because I don’t find myself very interesting. Especially where I’ve been and what I’ve done; it wasn’t interesting to me when it was happening, why would anyone else want to hear about it? I’m not shy, but don’t think anyone would really want to hear that stuff. I’d much rather listen to other people; I think that’s one reason Kelly connected to me; I listen to her.”

I stand and start to clean up, she insists on helping. I have her put the dishes in the sink to soak, I put the leftovers in the frig and wipe the counter and table down; we keep running into each other, more often now. Finally, we’re done; she turns to me, I put my hands on her hips and say, “Sorry there’s no dessert; how about a first kiss instead?”

“It’s about time,” she giggles. “Kelly said you’d probably take a while getting to this.”

I smile and move close; cup her head in my hands and give her a lingering kiss, massaging her lips with mine. “I can be a little slow sometimes, but eventually I’ll get there. Besides; some things are to be savored, not rushed.” I kiss her again, she responds eagerly. I move my hands to her ass and pull her to me; she wraps her arms around my neck and whispers in my ear, “I’m ready for you to make love to me, what should we do now?”

“Kelly has told me this is your first time; it’s our first time, and I want to make sure it’s fun and enjoyable for you. We can make out here for a while; I love having your body against mine. When you’ve had enough of this, we can go to the living room and get comfortable on the couch.” We go back to kissing; I’m stroking her back under her sweater, she’s starting to move against me. After a couple minutes, she leans back and slowly lifts her sweater over her head; she’s wearing a lacy ivory bra that doesn’t look like it should be able to support her, but does. “You are so beautiful,” I tell her; then take my t-shirt off and we lean back against each other. I’m caressing her back and arms; I work my lips along her jaw to her neck, kissing and nibbling as I go. She’s doing the same to me, rubbing her hands up and down my chest and stroking my back.

“Kelly said you have almost zero body fat, and hardly any body hair; I love touching you. She likes and trusts you,” Irene says, “She says I can trust you too.”

“You can. I’ll never lie to you, or intentionally hurt you; you’ve always been a favorite of mine; I might not tell you everything; some secrets aren’t mine to tell. I’ll be leaving in a few months, you have to keep that in mind; and I don’t know how often I’ll be back, if ever.”

“But you’re here now.”

“Completely and totally here for you now; today and for the next few months.”

“Good enough; let’s go try out the couch,” she giggles.

I turn the stereo on softly; I lead her to the couch and lay down, then have her lay down on top of me. We make out some more; I unhook her bra and caress her back and sides, she eases the bra off, then lays back down and resumes kissing me. Soon she lifts off me a bit so I can get to her nipples, she mashes them to my mouth.

“I worry about my breasts being too big,” she murmurs.

“They’re perfect. You probably shouldn’t go around braless; you’d stop traffic just walking down the sidewalk.”

She laughs a little; “I developed early; it was problem for me. I’ve adjusted, but I tend to cover them up, hide them.”

“They’re beautiful.” We neck for a while; I try to reach into her jeans to cup her ass, they’re just too tight. “Did you paint these on?” I ask her. “You look fantastic in them, but they’re in the way now.”

She giggles and starts to stand up; “I’ll take my pants off if you take yours off too.”

“Deal.” I declare. “Me first; I want to watch you shimmy out of yours; I love your hips and ass, I’m sure your legs are going to be great too.” I quickly doff my jeans, but leave my underwear on; she notices I’m mostly erect already, “We’ll get to that in a while, we’ve got all afternoon.” She starts removing her jeans; “Slowly sweetheart,” I tell her, “Tease me a little. You are so sexy; I’m having a hard time trying not to rush this.” She’s still giggling, but slows down and teases me some. She finally gets them off, tosses them on the coffee table, then lays back down on me. Now I can really caress her; fondling her ass, massaging her back and neck, while kissing her and telling her how good this is. She’s telling me the same; then stops.

“This isn’t fair,” she says. “I can’t hardly get to you; I want to explore your body too.”

“You’re right. This couch is way too narrow to lay side-by-side comfortably, let’s move to the bedroom.” We stand up and I lead her there; we stand next to the bed and kiss and caress some more. I’m erect in my shorts; soon she puts her hand in my underwear and grabs my ass, then moves her hand around front and grasps my cock. I grunt encouragement, she starts moving her hand back and forth along my length. “Why don’t you kneel down, take my underwear off, and really examine me; explore all you want.” She smiles and kneels, taking my shorts off as she goes. I step out of them and kick them a side, she’s gently stroking my cock and turning it from side to side. “Like most guys, I’ve been circumcised. Some guys haven’t, with them the tip of their cock isn’t exposed, it’s sheathed in some extra skin.” She lifts it and uses her other hand to explore my balls. “You want to be gentle with those; if you get too rough with them, we’ll be done before we get started, and not in a good way.”

She’s giggling again. “You shaved down here? You’re so soft and warm, but hard at the same time. I know you’re going to fit in me; I’m not really worried about that.”

“Yes; I shaved after I saw Kelly picking hair from her mouth when sucking on me, seemed to be something I should do. Play around as long as you like, you can be firm with the shaft; the tip is the most sensitive part.” She plays with it a little more, then licks the tip; I suck in my breath; she looks up and I nod encouragement. She licks again, then takes it into her mouth; I start to gently thrust a little bit, soon she’s bobbing her head tentatively. Shortly I remove my cock from her mouth; “That’s fantastic, honey; but you need to stop for now; it’s too good.” I lift her to her feet, and kiss her some more; I put my hand into her panties, she spreads her legs slightly and I cup her sex. She’s moaning a little; I don’t need any more encouragement and kneel before her and slowly remove the panties, stroking her legs as I go. As she steps out of them, I lean forward and first lick her abdomen, then lightly blow on it. “I want to use my tongue on you, is that alright?”

“I don’t know,” she whispers.

I look up at her; “If you don’t like it, or it gets to be too much; you can stop me, just like I stopped you.” I get a small nod; I stand up, turn her and tell her to sit back on the bed, to lean back on her elbows. I get her settled, lean in for another lingering kiss, then gently spread her legs and kneel between them. I run my hands up the outside of her legs, lean down and kiss her abdomen again, the start trailing kisses to her slit. She’s ready, clit already exposed and quivering a little; I don’t tease, but put my tongue flat on her clit and give her one slow lick. I hear her gasp as she grabs a fistful of my hair, I hold still for a moment, then do it again.

“Oh my god!” she breathlessly exclaims. “Kelly warned me how good this is; don’t stop!”

With that encouragement I start gently working on her. “Let me know what you like; firmer or lighter, faster or slower; whatever feels best for you. Cum if you can, I’d really like that.”

She’s moaning continuously, muttering about how good it was; suddenly she clamps down hard on my head with her legs and hand and starts shaking. “Oh my, oh my, oh my...” she babbles as she orgasms; I keep at her for a few moments, then ease back and let her catch her breath; she collapses back on the bed. I get on the bed beside her, and cuddle and caress her.

After a minute or so she shifts a little, putting her arm around me. “Not bad, huh?” I ask her.

“Not bad?” she giggles. “Holy cow! I’ve gotten myself off a couple times, but that was easily twice as intense. No wonder Kelly is glowing when she comes to work.”

“The next step will be different, but even better. Do you need to go to the bathroom, want something to drink, anything?”

“Yes, to both; you go get my soda and I’ll go use the bathroom.”

A couple minutes later we’re curled up in the bed; she has her head on my shoulder and is playing with my dick. “Now what?” she asks.

“Whatever you want. You can be on top if you want, and control how fast we go; or you can be on your back and I can enter you that way. Either way we need to make sure you are thoroughly lubricated; that’s the most important part.” I take the tube of lube out of the nightstand drawer and show it to her. “This will keep the discomfort down to a minimum; we’ll put some on you, and some on me, and go slow. Let me get a towel to put down beneath us, the lube can get a little messy.”

She rolled over on her side, I put the towel on the bed; when she’s on her back again, I kneel between her legs and put some lube on me, then warned her; “This is going to be a little cool when I first put it on you.” She gasped and giggled a little; I worked it along her slit and massaged her clit with my lubed fingers. Soon she’s not giggling anymore, just gasping and wiggling. I put some more lube on my cock, then run it up and down her slit, massaging her clit with it.

After a couple minutes of teasing her; “Now, honey; get in me now,” she whispered.

I positioned myself at her opening, then quickly eased into her an inch. She stopped breathing for a second with a little frown, then wiggled a little bit. I advance another inch, then pull back out an inch. I do that a couple more times, then pull out and put more lube on me; and ease back into her again. I go slow, going a tiny bit deeper with each thrust; soon she’s moving against me. After a few more strokes I’m buried to the hilt in her; she gasps again when my pelvis hits her clit.

“Oh my,” she says, “I’m so full.” She moves against me experimentally; “This is nice; keep moving,” she demands. I thrust slowly for a minute, then pull out; “No!” she says, “Stay in me!”

“I need a second, honey; I’m getting too close to finishing.” I massage and tongue her breasts for a minute; I kiss her and she shoves her tongue in my mouth, I suck at it for a second. She reaches down between us, lines us up again, and pulls me forward; now wrapping her legs around me.

“Fuck me!” she throatily whispers in my ear. “I want to feel you cumming in me. DO ME!”

I start thrusting again, softly at first, then stronger; banging my pelvis against her clit. I try to hold back as long as I can, but I don’t last; a couple minutes later I start blasting into her, spurting strongly in her. She’s wrapped tight around me, moaning and trembling.

“I feel you; I feel you; it’s so good!” she squeals, thrusting back against me. I feel her twitching for a couple moments; she stiffens for a second, then slowly relaxes. I stay in her; my erection weakens but doesn’t completely disappear. I shift a little to get most of my weight off her, she holds me tight to her again; “No, don’t pull out yet!” I start very slowly rocking against her; out an inch, then back in; keeping us lubricated. I lean down and give her a lingering kiss, she dreamily responds. I pull her legs up against my sides, her knees under my arms; I tell her to hold on as I gently roll us over so she’s on top. I shift a little so we’re back in the middle of the bed, and get the towel back underneath us; then gently grasp her ass and move her up and down my shaft a little. Soon she’s moving on her own.

“Okay baby, you’re in control now; whatever you want to do is fine with me. You do want to keep moving a little, so we don’t get ‘stuck’.”

She lifts up a little and wiggles a bit, “Ummm...” she moans deep in her throat. “So good; I swear I feel you in my belly,” she giggles. We’re still chest to chest, her breasts barely touching me; I reach up between us and cup and fondle her breasts and nipples, and pull on them a little. She gasps, “I felt that in my clit, I swear I did; do it again.” I do, then move her enough that I can get one of her nipples in my mouth and start sucking on it; she mashes down on my mouth. “I’m so sensitive; I feel you touching me everywhere.” I move my hands down her sides and clutch her ass tightly, then push myself deeply into her and flex my cock. “Ohhh, I felt that too.” She puts her hands on my shoulders and lifts herself up to arm’s length, “Are you okay; is this alright?”

“Honey, it doesn’t get any better than this. Are you okay, any pain or soreness?”

“There was a little pinch when you first got in me, not really pain; I almost thought I imagined it. I’m good now, more than good; this is great,” she’s giggling again. “How long can we do this?”, gently moving up and down.

“As long as you want. I doubt I’m going to lose my erection now; but your legs may get a little tired. I won’t be able to cum again for a while; just have fun and concentrate on yourself, do what feels good to you.

She starts moving a little bit more, varying the angle and depth, occasionally shuddering; smiling all the time. “I understand now what Kelly said about having fun, I don’t ever want to stop.” I move her so she’s sitting fully upright; she’s rocking against me a little stronger now. I reach down between us and get my thumb on her clit; I stroke it in time with her rocking; that gets another gasp. I reach up with my other hand and fondle and pull at her nipples; she’s thrusting down hard on me now; I think she’s close.

“Cum for me baby; don’t hold back, reach for it, let it go!”

This is turning out to be a big one for her; I keep thumbing her clit and clutching at her breasts, she’s grunting and gasping for air; trembling and shaking, her breasts heaving. Suddenly she stiffens and I feel her clamping down on me. Soon she collapses, I hold her tight and stroke her back and sides.

After a couple minutes I tell her, “You don’t have to lift off me if you don’t want to, but try to straighten out your legs, lay flat on top of me.” Another minute goes by, I can feel her trembling ease off, she shifts a tiny bit.

“Okay, okay; give me a day or two.” she mumbles, chuckling at me. “I’m done for now, maybe forever.”

I chuckle with her; “This gives a whole new meaning to ‘having fun’, doesn’t it? You’ll never hear that phrase again without thinking of this afternoon.” Now she’s really laughing.

“Kelly said I’d have to watch out for you, that you’d try to make this special for me; I am going to remember this forever. Okay, I’m going to try to straighten out now, you may have to help me, I don’t want to lose you yet.” With a little effort we get adjusted, her legs together on mine, me still in her. She’s resting her head on my shoulder, occasionally coming up for a kiss; I keep moving her a bit so we don’t get stuck, and stroking her arms, back and ass. “If I was a cat, I’d be purring,” she giggles.

“Isn’t this nice?” I ask. “We don’t have to be done yet, but pretty soon you’re going to have to get off me. You’re going to need to pee, and I’ll need to clean up. We can shower, if you’d like?”

“Just another 24 hours, then I’ll be ready,” she snickers. I give her ass a little smack, then stroke it. She hugs me tightly, then moves up a little so we can dis-engage. “Ahhhh...” I get another loving kiss, then she carefully climbs off me. “We are a sticky mess,” she says. “I’m glad you put the towel down.”

“Love can be messy sometimes, but it’s worth it. You go to the bathroom and start the shower; I’ll be in soon.” She cups her sex, leans over and kisses me again, then heads to the bathroom. I get off the bed and clean myself some with the towel, throw it in the dirty clothes, then go to the kitchen for a drink. I come back and hear the shower running, I go in the bathroom and let her know I’m there. “I’m peeing, plug your ears if it bothers you.”

She giggles and says; “Just hurry up and get in here, I want to feel your body against mine again.”

I bring the shower cap in and offer it to her. “There’s a hairdryer and curler if you need them.” She’s facing me; she thinks for a second, then leans back into the water and wets her hair. I move in and wrap my arms around her, we just enjoy the water running down our bodies for a minute. She grabs the shampoo and soaps up; I do the same and use the suds to wash off the rest of my body. She uses the conditioner, then turns around and leans back against me while it soaks in. I cup her breasts in my hands, she moves her hands onto mine and squeezes. She then turns her head and body for a kiss; which starts off slow but gets passionate quickly. I cup her sex; she spreads her leg slightly for easy access. I’m still mostly erect; she finds my cock and starts stroking me.

“How long will this last?” she asks, giving me a tug.

“With you playing with it; forever,” I joke. “Actually; I normally lose the erection soon after cumming, but this is so stimulating...”

“You think I’m stimulating?” she giggles again.

“Honey, you’re so sexy my nose is getting hard.”

Now she’s laughing again. “You’re making this so much fun; is it always like this?”

“It’s supposed to be. I’ve been told that quickies are nice; sometimes you can get so aroused that all you want is sex right away, no foreplay is needed. Guys can be ready in seconds; women seem to take a little longer.”

“How do you know all this?” she asks; “you and Kelly haven’t been lovers all that long.” I explain about reading a lot, the magazines and going to the library; when I mention the Penthouse, Playboy, and Cosmopolitan in the living room, she perks up. “Can I read them?”

“Of course; let’s dry off, put on the robes, then go back to the couch.” We rinse again and then towel off quickly; I leave her to dry and curl her hair. I put on a robe and are sitting on the couch when she appears in her robe; I stand to give her a hug, she stops me, un-belts both our robes, then moves her naked body against mine for the hug.

“I’m never going to get enough of this. You feel so good against me; even your cock against my belly feels right.”

“You have such an incredible body; all the right curves in all the right places,” I tell her, “I could do this all day.” I kiss her again, then sit her in the corner of the couch. “Now for some more good stuff; put your feet in my lap.” I sit down, she giggles and complies; I hand her the Penthouse and start massaging her feet; she melts back into the cushions and starts humming.

“My gosh, this is almost as good as the sex!” I do the soles of her feet, run my hands on the top of the arches, get my fingers between her toes, and rub up her lower legs and calves. I work on her for 5 minutes or so; her eyes are half closed and her mouth is open a little. She gives herself a little shake, “I could go to sleep right here, right now.”

“Go ahead; I’m not going anywhere.”

She settles back even more, moving down so her calves are in my lap; I’m now massaging her feet and most of her legs. She opens the magazine and starts thumbing through it, “These women are so beautiful.”

“You are just as beautiful; and haven’t had 20 people working on you for the last hour for one picture.” She smiles at me and blows a kiss; I lift a leg and kiss her foot, that gets another giggle. Soon she’s reading intently, “Have you found the Penthouse Letters?” She nods without looking up. “Most of them are written by men, but sometimes a woman will submit one. For me, those are the most interesting.” I keep massaging her feet and legs; she’s obviously reading one of the better letters. We sit comfortably for almost an hour; she gets through the Penthouse and I give her the Cosmo. She’s even more absorbed by it, reading a couple of the articles and commenting on them.

Eventually she puts the magazine down and lays back; “This is so nice, so relaxed; your hands feel so good on me. What’s next?” she grins at me.

“Whatever you want,” I tell her again; “I’m ready to do anything you’d like to try. I’d like to lay down with you again; I love the feel of your naked body against mine.”

“That sounds perfect; can we do it here on the couch? I’m so relaxed right now I don’t want to move.”

I have her lean forward so I can put a pillow between her and the corner of the couch; then have her lean back and shift down a little more. I get on my knees between her legs, remove my robe and have her spread hers; then lay down on top of her and give her a kiss. She quickly wraps her arms and legs around me; we kiss and caress for several minutes, then I trail kisses down her jaw and neck as I shift down to her breasts. I kiss and nibble at them; she pushes them together and mashes my face between them. I pull back a little; “Your breasts are perfect.” I tell her, “Just perfect; I’d like to play with them every day.” I cup her breasts and lightly pinch and pull on her nipples a moment, they harden nicely again and I suck on them both.

She moans a little; “I swear, I feel that all the way to my groin,” she says. My abdomen is against her slit, I flex those muscles and feel her tilt her pelvis against me. I move further down her body, kissing and licking as I go; sticking my tongue in her belly button gets a giggle and a moan.

I shift down a little more, using my chin and lips to caress her abdomen, just skirting her pubic hair. “Do you want me to stop here?” I ask.

“No, No, No; keep going!” she pleads; pushing my head down with her hands. I shift my arms to under her legs; she spreads them a little so I can get to her slit, I do one lick from bottom to top again and she spreads them wide for me. She’s kept her hands on my head, now she grasps me firmly and I let her direct me to where she wants attention. I lick and nibble and suck, with my lips and tongue; sometimes fast sometimes slow, using firm pressure, then a feathery touch. “This is fantastic; you’re driving me crazy!” she breathes heavily.

“I’m going to use my finger on you now; if’s uncomfortable at all, let me know.” I gently circle her opening with my tongue first, then go back to her clit as I slowly insert my index finger. She’s really rolling her hips now, moaning constantly; I start thrusting, gently at first, then slowly picking up speed with my tongue and finger. She wraps her legs around me, when I curl my finger and start stroking her g-spot; she starts thrashing madly. I feel her rhythmically clamping down on my finger as she climaxes; I work on her until she pushes my head away.

“Enough, enough; you’ve got to stop!” she wiggles away from me; I move up and place my chest on her pelvis again; reach up and squeeze her breasts firmly. “My god; what are you doing to me?!” she moans; “I’m dying here!” I hold her as the trembling subsides; then move up further, kiss her, then hug her tightly. “Are you going to get in me again, now?” she asks with a quiver.

“I could, but I think it would be too much for you right now; and a little too late. I should have gotten in you when you first started cumming; that might have made it better.”

“Better?!”

“Honey; I’m just starting to learn you and your body, what you like, what works for you. This will get better if we keep at it.”

“If?!!!”

“I guess I’m assuming you’ll want to do this again.”

“Carl!”, then she starts giggling; “I may not let you ever leave this couch.” She wraps her legs around me again and squeezes me tight. “I’ve heard some of the girls talking about sex, and Kelly has talked about you and her; but this can’t put into words.”