Chapter 51: What Do You Know?

April 3, 1984, Chicago, Illinois

"You're home early!" Bianca observed when I walked into her room just after 8:30pm.

"Stefi is sick from something she ate, so I had dinner with her friend Tara. After dinner, Tara and I listened to music in her room for a bit before I headed home."

"In Jonathanland, that's the setup for getting laid! Every! Single! Time!"

"She offered, but I elected to come home instead."

"That's inconsistent with your past behavior. Come to bed."

I undressed, went to the bathroom to empty my bladder, then returned and climbed into bed with Bianca. I got under the comforter, and we lay side by side, on our backs to continue the conversation.

"I'm being consistent with my current thinking," I said. "I'm still trying to sort things out, and it's not as if I'm being a monk."

"Unless I'm completely out of the loop, you've only been with one new girl since December, and that was Stefi."

"That's true, and that was ... call it an experiment. I needed to test the waters and start figuring out how I was going to manage that part of my life. I don't know just yet what kinds of relationships I want to have. Right now, the only things that are clearly defined are my relationship with Deanna as her patron, with you as the mother of my daughter, and with Violet as a close friend.

"Beyond that, CeCi will be around for another three years but then move to California, given she wants to get into movie making. I may be with Beth again, but she's eventually going to marry. I ended the physical part of my relationship with Marcia because that's going nowhere. And I basically gave Teri an ultimatum, which I seriously doubt she can accept.

"Stefi is a fun distraction, but she's not interested in anything long-term, at least as far as I can tell. You know that Alexa and Natasha have both offered, and I may take them up on their offers. Claire, too, but I'm less certain about that one. Katy and Esme are interested, and I put them off until they come back from Princeton. Then there are the girls from the past who aren't seeing anyone seriously.

"The ultimate question is — which path do I take? All the options are on the table, except marriage, from a long-term monogamous relationship to a harem, though that last one isn't nearly as interesting as it once might have been. And whatever decision I make, it has to allow for my special relationships with you, Violet, and Deanna."

"You obviously want to talk, but can I ask some questions about Tara?"

"Sure."

"Were you attracted to her?"

"Moderately. She's about five inches shorter than me, thin, average looking, with blonde hair."

"And Stefi?"

"About the same height as Tara, dark hair, cute, with what I'd call typical Midwestern looks."

"So, just curvy enough to be interesting and soft in all the right places?"

"Something like that. You're curvier; Stefi is more like CeCi, though not as tall."

"I sure have curves now!" Bianca declared. "Fortunately, I haven't gained too much weight. I'm basically right in the middle of the expected weight gain. Anyway, would it have been different if you were more attracted to Tara?"

"I don't think so. I think what it came down to is a combination of what I said about testing the waters and not wanting to mess things up with Stefi."

"That good?" Bianca asked.

"She treats blowjobs as if they're worship services and has offered to do nothing but perform oral sex for the entire time we're together!"

Bianca laughed, "And no sane, red-blooded male is going to pass that up!"

"As she said, she's playing with her new toy and isn't done with it yet, which I interpreted to mean that, at some point, she'll decide to move on. And that's OK. I like her; she's fun and funny, but it's literally just sex. Circling back to my point about figuring things out, I'm curious how you see the future."

"Well, you know I strongly prefer girls, so I need to meet someone new, though I'm in no rush because of Sofía. But I suspect you assumed that and are asking you and me."

"Yes."

"My ideal future hasn't changed much — a long-term girlfriend, a baby with you, and you and I sleep together on occasion. That seems to fit most of your possible scenarios, except one where you commit to strict monogamy. I obviously would prefer you didn't, but you seem predisposed to that kind of relationship."

"Maybe," I said. "That's what I'm trying to sort out. No matter what, that's not going to happen anytime soon. I know I said that before Keiko, but events conspired to push us to a commitment before we intended. We were slowly working our way there but ran out of time. In a sense, it's like our decision to have a baby — our preferred timeline was after you graduated, but events conspired to convince us to change it."

"But you feel Deanna's idea has merit, right?"

"Yes, and that argues against a strictly monogamous relationship. And unlike before Keiko, I can see myself in some kind of long-term relationship that allows for that. As for you and me, it's about Sofía. Whether we sleep together is an open question and has to work within whatever relationships we each have. Fundamentally, you and I will configure our relationship to fit the circumstances, just as we have from day one."

"True. Violet is the true wildcard, isn't she?"

"Yes. To say that it's complicated is a serious understatement. She was basically ready to move forward when I revealed my new thinking. That kind of sent her for a loop because she'd be having sex with me with no promise of marriage. She was never of the mindset that sex had to wait for marriage, but she expected it to be in an exclusive relationship that had the possibility of marriage."

"She didn't rule it out?"

"No. She's contemplating what that means, and if it's sufficient to simply agree that we'll be close for the rest of our lives, whichever way it goes."

"She'd come with you, Jack, and me, right?"

"Assuming that ever happens! I know you and Jack think it's the right move, but there would have to be some incident that not only made me want to leave Spurgeon but also allowed me to leave with most of my AUM intact. I can't imagine what that might be."

"But you want to be on your own, right?"

"That would be the ideal, but I'm very happy at Spurgeon. You know I object to the stuff that goes on with secretaries, but we have a toehold on fixing that — you, Violet, and Anna. And I feel the political environment is changing, too. Can you point to anything else?"

"Besides the rumors about Noel Spurgeon? Not really."

"And if he's not careful, he could end up in prison, which would probably be the end of Spurgeon Capital. At that point, it would be easy to leave, as customers would likely bail if I didn't. But Jeri insists he has enough money to get away with it."

"Until he doesn't," Bianca said. "One miscalculation, and it's all over."

"It's a foolish risk, especially given how widespread the rumors are. But that aside, I have to be loyal to Matheson and Spurgeon, given everything they've done for me and the fact that they have never once harmed me in any way. If that changes, then I'll consider it."

"Back to Violet, if she were to ask for an exclusive relationship, would you?"

"Not at this point. As I said to her, if that's what she wants, a 'wait and see' approach is best for her. Nothing is going to interfere with our friendship or going to sporting events or her working for me."

"That makes sense. What will you do if Teri calls you?"

"The smart-ass answer is I'll fuck her brains out; the actual answer is I'm not sure because her singlemindedness has always focused on marriage, and I'd be concerned she saw fucking as a means to an end."

"You mean she'd be playing the long game? Fuck, and then slowly pull back on the reins until you had no more freedom?"

"Yes. Obviously, I could push back, but why invite trouble? I'd have to be convinced she really meant it, and I'm not quite sure how to do that. I mean, sure, I could fuck her and then tell her to get lost, but that seems crass."

"True, but it would actually serve her right."

"No, actually, it wouldn't. That would be on me, not on her. It would be unethical."

"Which is the kiss of death for anything you might consider."

"A line I cannot cross."

"So, all that said, was Tara really just about Stefi? Or something else?"

"As I said, it really is about figuring out the best way forward. It's not as if I've taken new girls off the table, given I'm leaning strongly towards being with Natasha and Alexa."

"And Katy and my cousin, right?"

"Yes, but I've been with them before. We'll see how things go, but I'll likely invite Meg, Miranda, Kasey, and Josie on dates sometime after we move. I got along really well with them, and none of them are seeing anyone seriously. Most of the other girls have boyfriends at this point, which is not surprising."

"I think you're on a good path. Obviously, Keiko is still in your mind and always will be, but life does have to go on."

"Yes, it does," I agreed.

April 4, 1984, Chicago, Illinois

Wednesday was another attorney-free day, though I'd likely have very few of those starting in about a week when the hearing on Gwen's motions would be held. I had lunch with Violet, and we went to the gym, and otherwise had a normal day. The only thing that was out of the ordinary was a fax from Brown Construction with the final quote for the electrical work and blinds for the condo. I signed it and faxed it back, then called to confirm the dates.

At 5:00pm, I left the office and headed to Mr. Greek Gyros in Greektown to have dinner with Deanna, taking my car, as the combined walks were too far to make it otherwise. We ordered our food and sat down.

"Sorry about yesterday," Deanna said. "I didn't get the message until this morning."

"No harm, no foul," I said. "It all worked out in the end. Also, I received the fax from Brown Construction, signed it, and faxed it back."

"Cool. Have you heard from Keiko's grandfather about the flooring?"

"The mats will arrive next week. I already agreed to an hourly rate quote with Brown Construction because they weren't comfortable with a fixed price for something they've never done. Once the mats are here, they'll coördinate with me for an install."

"OK. The washer and dryer will be delivered tomorrow, as will the furniture. We already have the bedding, but we'll wash it before we put it on the beds. I bought a cheap, king-sized fitted sheet for Friday night, so we don't have to try to rush to get the new stuff washed. And I'll bring towels, TP, and soap with me tomorrow."

"Thanks for taking care of everything."

"Thank Natasha! She's running the project! I'm just the gofer!"

"She's tracking her hours, right?"

"Yes. She's also hoping for a completion bonus!"

I chuckled, "We'll see."

"If you want my advice, the way you handled things before Keiko worked pretty well, though I'd advise not getting involved with Ellie beyond mentoring her."

"I actually had a fairly long conversation with Bianca last night, and I think the best approach is a measured one."

"Eight inches at a time!" Deanna said mirthfully.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm curious — are there other girls you'd suggest avoiding?"

"She was really the only problematic one. You know why, right?"

"From that question, I suspect not."

The counter-man brought our gyro platters and confirmed we were satisfied. He returned to the counter, and Deanna and I began to eat.

"To create a situation where you had no real option other than a harem with her as the primary concubine. She wanted you to have a reputation as someone willing to fuck anyone, anytime, on command, and make sure any girl who you felt was a legitimate option for the future was put off by it."

"You're joking!"

"Think about it, Jonathan. She escalated at every opportunity and would have continued escalating."

"Physiology has its limits! I'm not sure even the last baseball game was humanly possible."

"She was testing the limits of your physiology, and I daresay would have switched to games, contests, or some other way of increasing the number of girls."

"Even assuming that's the case, I have to believe there was a limit to girls who would do that."

"Yes, of course, but not practically. She'd just find new Freshman girls every year. She was insanely jealous of Keiko and wanted to prevent you from being a couple, if at all possible. If you hadn't put a stop to it, she'd have thrown the kitchen sink at preventing you from committing to Keiko."

"You're making me reconsider mentoring her," I said. "That kind of thinking is dangerous. I disagree with the 'win at all costs' strategy my mentor follows, believing there's more profit to be had in a 'win-win' scenario. And if I have to give up some short-term gains to achieve that, I'm sure not going to lose sleep over it."

"You haven't committed to hiring her, have you?"

"No, because I can't make that commitment, and even if I could, I wouldn't until after she graduates. I know I can count on Jack, Bianca, and Violet to behave ethically. I'm not so sure about Ellie after what you've said. And it's not as if I could ask her."

"Sure you could. If you don't believe you'll receive an honest answer, that tells you something important in and of itself."

"True, but I expect her to simply say it's her voyeuristic fantasy. Why would she admit something that would sunder the relationship? And it would be tough to reject her answer, given it's consistent with what she said before."

"But is it consistent with her behavior? Didn't she tell you she was unhappy you chose Keiko over her?"

"Yes."

"And she knew you were on track to ask Keiko to marry you, and escalated, despite Keiko ostensibly being her close friend. Think about that."

"A good point. I have to ask what you think I should do with Teri."

"Bang her like a drum and then act indifferent!"

"I actually would expect the sex to be pretty hot."

"Even more reason to act as if it were 'ho-hum'! She'd go nuts!"

"Which is what I'm trying to avoid!"

"I'm just yanking your chain, well, mostly. Honestly, you have better options for uncomplicated, unattached sex. Girls like Stefi or Katy and Esme. Or Natasha and Alexa. Even if they thought about a relationship, which I'm not saying they would, they're not thinking that now, except perhaps in the most speculative, general kind of way. If it's the red hair, ask Nicole to come over!"

"Red hair and green eyes take a backseat to Asian girls of every sort!"

"I'm curious how that developed," Deanna inquired.

"Blame Anala! I barely knew anyone from Asia back home, except one exchange student. When I met Anala, I thought she was the most beautiful girl I'd ever met. She rejected my advances, but we became friends. That's how I met Gudia, and then later, I met Huifen and eventually Keiko. If I have a type, that's it — Chinese, Japanese, or Indian girls. But looks aren't the only thing, obviously."

"And tall, thin, dark-haired girls with braids?"

"You know I'm attracted to you," I said. "And there's way more to it than just skin color, eye color, eye shape, and hair color. I would never let physical traits control a relationship. Sure, it might be why I noticed someone, but not why I stayed with them."

We finished our meals and left the restaurant for the drive to the Art Institute, where we parked and went inside. We saw Stefi waiting outside the office, so Deanna continued on to the studio.

"Sorry about last night," Stefi said.

"It's OK. Feeling better?"

"Still a little queasy. I'm pretty sure it was the tacos, and Nika, Sherry, Kimba, and I were all puking our guts out. I saw the nurse yesterday and today, and she said it was either that or stomach flu. Anyway, I wouldn't have been upset if you were with Tara last night. It's not like she was taking you away from me, and we're not a couple, right?"

"Right. Just good, clean fun. You agree, right?"

"Absolutely! I'm probably not going to feel up to playing with my toy before the weekend, and you're busy with class, the hockey game, and the baseball game, right?"

"Yes."

"Next Saturday? The 14th?"

"That should work."

"Same bat time, same bat channel! 1:00pm at my dorm?"

"Yes."

"If you aren't busy tomorrow, Tara would love to see you. It's between you and her, so long as you don't blow me off for her!"

"I'll think about it."

"Just call the dorm and ask for her if you decide to."

Stefi went to the studio, and I joined Alexa in the office to change into our tennis outfits, which basically consisted of white shorts and a white T-shirt for me and a white tennis skirt and a white polo for Alexa.

"That's downright sexy," I said.

"Guys watch women's tennis to see short skirts and nice legs!"

"I can safely say I've never seen a tennis match. All I know is that you hit the ball back and forth across the net, kind of like ping-pong."

"Kind of. Grab your racket; I'll grab the balls!"

I laughed, and we headed to the studio to pose. When class ended, we changed, and I headed home with Deanna.

April 5, 1984, Chicago, Illinois

"Another half point," Pete said, coming into my office. "That will bring the Prime Rate to 12%."