Chapter 14

Nobody drank too much beer and wine and the three of them left around 11.00 leaving Maggie and Tony who were staying there that night. Most of the evening was spent getting Ara to talk about herself, fill in some of their blanks, as well as recounting some embarrassing moments from the last eight years. Everyone was going to come down and spend some time in London with them once they all knew what was happening with jobs and courses. But all of that was secondary as they started to walk up the hill back to the flat. Suzanne started.

“It was fascinating sitting listening to Maggie talk. About being called a slapper while at school and how she had these two competing impulses that she needed to deal with. We will talk about for days and weeks to come I am sure but there were several things that stood out. By far the biggest was the ‘what’s the big deal?’ mentality. What she and Tony are doing with you is not mainstream, and to most people wouldn’t make sense. But you have been helping them for what, five years? Close to it.”

Ara jumped in.

“The other big thing was at one point Maggie said, ‘who else would you trust more?’. Now the tenses were all mixed up at first but she and Tony couldn’t imagine trusting anyone else. And I can see that. One of the reasons we three are together here today is because Suzanne and I had made that leap and trusted you for years. The models that you work with trust you.”

She shrugged.

“There is a lot to ask, a lot to say but at the end of the day I trust you, we trust you. Maggie was blunt and made sure we knew how intimate the photography was. She had her feet on my shoulders. Now she had her jeans on but it was very vivid.”

“She came right out and asked us if we would have a problem with you continuing to photograph her. We sort of looked at each other and shrugged. So we told her we were fine with it. Things may change but I doubt it. But Maggie also said she wanted you to talk to us about it, not that she was okay with you talking, she wanted you to. She wants to sit at the dining room table knowing that we have heard all the stories.”

Ara and Suzanne both squeezed his arm.

“She is as bad as us, the mental is really important.”

“Maggie said to me that she nearly dragged Tony to the front room.”

They laughed.

“She should have told us, we would have used the opportunity with you.”

When they got back to the flat Andrew noticed that either Maggie or Tony had left an envelope on the table by the door. When he saw how it was addressed he smiled and brought it through to the bedroom with him. Ara and Suzanne were quickly stripping so he put it on the bedside table and joined them in getting undressed as quickly as possible. Nobody talked about photo sessions, out loud at least, but it was clearly on everyone’s mind as the three of them fucked. Suzanne was lying on Andrew with Ara snuggled in beside them when Andrew broached the last topic.

“Since Maggie brought up her photo shoots this afternoon I thought I should tell you about the other lady I shoot with.”

Rather than try and explain Andrew grabbed the envelope off the nightstand and opened it. He couldn’t help smiling when he saw Ursula on the cover. Flipping through the pages he came to her photo spread. Suzanne almost fall off Andrew and they all ended sitting up looking at the magazine.

“The other model I work with is this lady. I took these shots.”

The two of them alternated between ‘oh my god’ and stunned silence. Finally Ara started.

“I thought I had a lot of questions after talking to Maggie but.”

“Tell us the story Andrew.”

It took him nearly 30 minutes to go through all the steps. Andrew called her Ursula throughout but explained all the steps that Elspeth went through from being Stacey’s chaperone to now posing for German porn magazines. He talked for several minutes about her reasons, how she was no longer ashamed of being a bigger woman. The two of them listened quietly although their eyes were constantly drawn to the pictures in the magazine.

“Her motivations are just like Maggie but she has gone that one step further and had her pictures published.”

Suzanne stopped for a moment before carrying on.

“And she is so brave. You would never see anything like that in the UK, even if she was wearing a bikini or underwear, never mind naked and fucking herself with a dildo.”

Ara butted in.

“I bet it is the same thing though isn’t it? Who else would she trust but you?”

Andrew nodded. Ara giggled.

“In the last 36 hours we have told Andrew’s grandmother, your parents, and four of your friends, and yet I can barely remember any of it. The lady really works for the photography business?”

Andrew nodded.

“That is a wig, and what looks like a tattoo on the inside of her wrist is a kid’s transfer. She is wearing blue contact lenses and the rings are fake, those are not her real wedding and engagement rings.”

“And her husband is there as well?”

“Just like Tony. He loves seeing his wife like this, loves that he is married to a nude model.”

“Nobody would understand if it was known, would they?”

He shook his head.

“Yet, ‘what’s the big deal?’.”

“With both couples it doesn’t hurt anyone, nobody is being forced to do it, in fact during the last photo shoot with Ursula and her husband I went and sat outside the studio for 10 minutes they were so worked up.”

Ara and Suzanne giggled.

“Really?”

“It is the same with Maggie and Tony.”

Andrew explained about the Norfolk Broads and the three weekends they had spent there. Suzanne and Ara immediately started planning a holiday. Finally the day caught up with them and the fell asleep, to dreams of photography. After their swim the next morning they were sitting eating breakfast.

“It was great to meet your friends, just to chat, put faces and conversations to people that the two of you have talked about. But I have to say all the photography news trumped everything. There is thinking how you are a good photographer and wanting to set up our own darkroom but then there is seeing an actual magazine with your work in it. And the model and how she is posing. Are they both going to come down to London and continue to pose?”

“Entirely up to you. They both want to, both couples want to not just the two models. But they also knew that if I ever got serious with a woman that it would have to be talked about.”

“Well we gave you our answer yesterday and nothing has changed. I want to hear about every session so that would be the only condition. Maggie is already keen but as long as Ursula is okay with you telling us all about her photo shoots then I am all for it. Suze?”

“Agreed. All three of us know that we are never going to be like Ursula, we are never even going to be like Maggie, but it is like you with your own modelling, it is a chance to get a peek into this mysterious world.”

Ara nodded in agreement. Finally photography was put to bed for the rest of the trip. Suzanne left to visit her grandmother in her care home, and Ara and Andrew walked over to take his Grandma to church. She was quiet on the walk up to church but seemed to be her usual self when talking to all her cronies after the service. Ara was simply introduced as one of Andrew’s friends and nobody made any comments. Well that week at least. He was sure there would be subtle questions about her in the weeks ahead. But what was noticeable, especially after the way that Ara’s grandfather had spent time with both him and Suzanne, and how the Jenners had spent time with Ara, was that Andrew’s Grandma was quiet, not particularly engaged. He just didn’t know how to call her on it, not while Ara was there. But then.

“I am pleased to see you so happy Andrew, I really am. And I can tell that Arabella and Suzanne are happy as well. But I am struggling with Gavin’s stubbornness, and the terrible fact that you have introduced the two women in your life to me, but not to your parents. I should be making more of an effort to get to know Arabella and I am interested but I have this raging internal fight going on. Everyone always asks after you whenever they visit. I know that Nancy and Davina would love to see you when you are here.”

She sighed.

“I have been feeling under the weather for most of the year, and Nancy has taken me to the doctors several times. But it is just general old-age, I am not suffering from something. But I am getting older, and I worry that should something happen to me then you will lose touch with your family. So forgive me for not being more interested and excited to meet Arabella and get to know her, but I am sad for where my family has ended up.”

She made an effort but her heart wasn’t in it. Arabella and Andrew left as soon as they decently could. Unless something changed Andrew’s future visits to his Grandma would be on his own, neither Suzanne or Arabella needed to be dragged through that every time.

“We are going to visit my parents, even although we all know it will be ghastly. Do you want to go and see your parents?”

Andrew shook my head.

“No. I don’t need the pain. Grandma can be sad and I will take my share of the blame. But my parents don’t know about my life. They don’t know about the modelling, my possible career, my relationship with either you or Suzanne never mind both of you together. What is the point in turning up, pretending to let bygones be bygones, and introducing you and Suzanne. Telling my uptight mother that we are a three? Nothing about it makes any sense. You listened to Grandma. Was there any sense of loss from my parents? They are perfectly happy pretending that I don’t exist. Grandma is one hundred percent right, if something happens to her the only reason I will come to Edinburgh is for my friends, Julian and Leslie, and Maggie and Tony. Sure I will keep the extended family informed of how life is doing but my cousin lives in Australia and no one has seen her in 15 years. This will be the same.”

Andrew didn’t know whether Ara completely agreed with him but she also didn’t challenge it.

“My father does not think I am his son, I heard him accuse my mother of it when I was 12. Despite the fact that I am the spitting image of his own father. That both my parents fucked around before they got married is neither here nor there, but Dad explicitly thinks I am not his, and the way Mum acts suggests that deep down she is not sure either. So they have made up this ridiculous complaint and are happy to pretend I don’t exist. So be it. I am at the stage now where I am equally happy for the same thing.”

Arabella would listen to her grandfather and go and see her parents even although they all knew it was a waste of time. Andrew, he didn’t listen to his grandmother and didn’t waste the time. He was now at the stage where thinking about his parents was a waste of time.

Telling Nikki and Fran was going to be as easy as telling the two couples in Edinburgh. The issue was logistics. Suzanne wanted to be there to tell them. But she also wanted to travel through to Glasgow with her parents for her graduation ceremony, spend time with them as a final thank you for supporting her for the last four years of university. So in the end they all drove to Glasgow on the Sunday afternoon, but Suzanne was going to get up early on the Monday morning and return to Edinburgh on the train so that she could immediately drive back through with her parents. It seemed unnecessarily complicated to Andrew but then when it came to family he knew he should sit quietly and shut up.

Andrew knew that Ara had been more nervous meeting his friends, including Nikki and Fran, than his Grandma. All the women were very protective of him, honorary big sisters and aunts. But she needn’t have worried. They had not even settled on the couch and hadn’t said a word when Nikki and Fran looked at each other and giggled.

“What is it with you Andrew McLeod, and women who like other women?”

As an icebreaker it took some topping. They had sussed out Suzanne years before that she liked both women and men, well women and Andrew. That Suzanne turned up with a woman and Andrew rather proved their point for them. He was once again despatched to make the tea while the four of them nattered away, all talking over each other and getting on like a house on fire. They weren’t suspicious of Ara, if both Suzanne and Andrew liked her then she had passed all the necessary tests. And of course, of all their friends and family, they knew the reality of living a discreet life. Of not being able to publically be who they were. But after they had been there for a couple of hours Suzanne disappeared through to their room but returned with a thick envelope, which was addressed to Andrew. She looked excited and passed it over to him. He looked at the label in the corner; Hermès. He knew what this was, and more importantly so did Suzanne.

“You said that Fran and Nikki could see the commercials. Come on Andrew, open it.”

The tape was practically snatched from his hand.

“When did this get delivered?”

“Monday while you were dancing the night away.”

That meant it was probably up to date, including the filler scenes he had filmed in February. He left half way through to make more tea, and was not sure that any of them noticed he wasn’t there. It was fascinating to watch their faces as this endless stream of commercials played out in front of them. He pottered around the kitchen, drawing out making the tea for as long as possible but still had to sit through the last five minutes before the screen finally snowed and it was over.

“I remember hearing about the first couple of commercials, you even showed me the lift.”

Nikki giggled as Fran reminisced.

“But that was something else.”

She looked over at Ara and Suzanne.

“What about the two of you?”

“We had seen more than three quarters of them by now, the last sets were all new but we had seen up until the horse riding.”

Ara looked at Suzanne, but carried on speaking.

“It is interesting seeing the way he is with different models. A lot of the commercials in the middle he seems detached, but I think that is only when you see him with people that he is friends with. Heloise and Andrew just seem to have fun, they are so relaxed. The woman in Florence and Pisa, that is Chiara, yes?”