Chapter 23

The women were standing side by side at the stove. Megan was frying bacon in one pan while Mona cooked a whole carton of eggs in the other. When Megan had produced a pound of bacon and a dozen eggs, Mona tried to remember the last time when she’d been able to do something like that. It was long before Covid. She suddenly felt poverty-stricken. Was this how poor women felt when they tried to scrape together a meal for their family?

“This is a lot,” she said.

“The men will be hungry,” said Megan.

“Josh is here,” Mona mentioned.

“He is?”

“I saw them in Erica’s room when I was looking for the bathroom.”

“Oh,” said Megan. “I’m sorry about that, too.”

“Why would you be sorry?”

“Because I knew it was getting more serious than I told you. We gave them too much freedom.”

“It was the only freedom they had during this fucking pandemic,” said Mona.

“Still, when Erica came to me and asked if she could go on birth control pills, I should have known things were getting too ... involved, between them.”

“So, why didn’t you? I’m not banging on you. I had no idea my son was that serious with a girl. I wouldn’t have believed it until I saw what I saw this morning. I’m really happy to know she’s protected.”

“She told me she had feelings, but they were just feelings, but she said she felt like they might get stronger some day.”

“I guess last night was some day,” said Mona. “It sure was for me. I never thought I’d be involved in a fucking orgy.”

“Me, either,” said Megan. “I don’t know how that happened.”

“We were talking about making porn videos and that you and I would act in them, and Bob and Dick would act in them, and that Josh and Erica would act in some, too.”

“Oh, yeah,” said Megan. “It was just an offer to let you make some money. You don’t have to take it seriously.”

“I can’t just forget last night and skip happily down the yellow, brick road,” said Mona. “Crazy things happened last night. It’s going to take some time for me to process it all. You said I didn’t have sex with Bob. Are you sure?”

“I don’t remember anything like that,” said Megan. “Are you sore down there?”

“Sore?”

“Bob is ... big. The first time we had sex I was sore for two days.”

“Wow!” said Mona. “No, I’m not sore.”

“Good.”

“Is it? I seem to remember talking about all these plots for movies and all of us were acting in them. I remember one of them was where you and I were secretaries and Bob was the boss and he fucked us both.”

“Really? I didn’t think it was both. Bob never mentioned anything to me about him doing you when we were planning on having you over.”

“Did he ever mention anything about Dick and you having sex on tape before you had us over?”

“No. I think I’d remember that.”

“Well, you showed Dick your boobs.”

“I did?”

“Yup. It was like you threw a switch. He got a chubby and started taking his clothes off.”

“Oh! Now I remember. Didn’t I flash Bob?”

“No, you flashed Dick.”

“What happened then?”

“I don’t remember you being there, but Dick and I did it on the couch.”

She blinked.

“We also did it on the floor. Oh my gosh,” she groaned, as she covered her face with her hands.

“There’s nothing wrong with being randy with your husband,” said Megan.

“At somebody else’s house? In front of people who are barely your friends? In front of our children?”

“What do you mean ... children?” asked Megan, who was suddenly alert.

“Josh said when they came home there was an orgy going on and it made him and Erica go have sex.”

Megan was pretty sure the young couple had started having sex a while back. She knew that at least Erica had blown the boy. That had happened multiple times during the shoot of the sex toys. She did not mention any of this to Mona. The poor woman had more than enough to think about already.

“Oh my,” she said, softly. “I’ve been home schooling her, but I didn’t intend to do a block on sex education.”

“I dreaded that, myself,” said Mona. “That was before he ever had a date with a girl. Now I don’t have to worry about it. He saw me naked this morning and we had a conversation as if we were both clothed. I’m still blown away by it.”

“Covid has turned everything upside down,” said Megan.

“I think you and Bob had something to do with turning everything upside down.”

“Us? How?”

“You let him take nude photos of you and sell them. I can’t know that and it not affect me. My husband can’t not be affected, either. And you want him and me to do the same thing!”

“I told you, you don’t have to do anything. It was just a wild idea, that’s all.”

“Our children want to make porn videos,” said Mona. “Josh wants to do a porn video!”

“That’s to make money for college,” said Megan. “And they haven’t done anything about that, yet.”

“They practiced acting in it last night,” said Mona, dryly.

“Oh,” said Megan. “I’m so sorry all this happened.”

“This may sound odd, but I don’t think I am,” said Mona. “Too many things have happened to me for it all to be coincidence. I would have never dreamed of letting a strange man take photos of me in almost nothing, and then show them to my husband. When I did, though, he went wild. You talk about spicing up a tired sex life! We are both academics, basically, but that night we were out-of-control teenagers again. And I wanted to do things with Bob. The pull to do that was hard and he knew it. He could have made a baby with me that day and I would have let him. But he didn’t do that. He didn’t take advantage of me. Instead, he just did something that made my life better.”

“I’m glad,” said Megan.

“And then I find out my friend poses nude for pictures that men on other fucking continents will see. And next it is suggested that I have sex with my husband and make a fucking porn video, which is something I could never have even conceived of. And what happened? My husband and I got naked and had sex and ended up in the same bed Bob and Megan were in. And did I mention everybody was naked... including my son and your daughter?!”

She began shoveling the scrambled eggs in a bowl, which had a lid sitting nearby. Megan had already put the bacon on low heat so it wouldn’t get too crispy.

Mona sighed.

“It all has to mean something. It has to! We’re going to lose our house and our retirement savings, and suddenly we’re offered a way to avoid all that. And all we have to do is have sex in public, while Bob films it and then sends it to Japan and Timbuktu or wherever!”

“You don’t have to do it,” said Megan, reaching out to touch Mona.

“It’s a gift horse,” said Mona. “It’s a fucking gift horse and you’re not supposed to look those in the mouth.”

“The gift horse isn’t going anywhere,” said Megan. “Let’s have breakfast and get out from under these hangovers and then we can talk. You do have a hangover ... right?”

“I never drink more than two glasses of wine. I haven’t gotten that drunk since I was in high school.”

“I hardly drink at all,” said Megan. “I’ve had those two bottles of wine for years. I got them from a parent who wanted to thank me for tutoring their son after school. The father owned a winery.”

“Well, they’re empty, now,” said Mona. “The food is done. Should we put it on a platter or something, or just let people do it buffet style?

“Platter,” said Megan. “I want this to be as normal a breakfast as possible.”

Mona snorted, but put the bowl of eggs on in the middle of the table. Megan put the bacon on a platter and put it beside the eggs.

“Should we have made biscuits, too?” Megan mused.

“Let’s save that for another day,” said Mona. “This will do. I’ll go get the men and ... our children while you set the table.”

“Okay,” said Megan.

Mona saw Dick’s clothing scattered around the living room and picked it up. Bob was standing out in the open while he peered into the waistband of a pair of running shorts to figure out what was the front and what was the back. Mona held the breath she had been about to use to get them moving. She stared at Bob’s limp penis. It looked as big as Dick’s when he had an erection. When he didn’t have an erection, Dick’s cock was maybe two inches long. It looked like his penis retracted into his body sometimes.

But Bob’s didn’t do that.

She shuddered and felt the beginnings of something she didn’t want to feel. She walked by Bob and said, “Breakfast is ready. You need to get moving.”

“Got it,” said Bob, as he used the shorts to cover his dick.

“Too late,” said Mona. “I already saw it.”

Dick was sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. She put his clothes down on the bed, beside him.

“You need to get dressed, Dick.”

“What the fuck happened?” he groaned.

“We got drunk and had an orgy and our son slept with Erica. Now, get dressed and come eat. You need to sober up so we can make some decisions.”

“Orgy?”

“Apparently you didn’t sleep with Megan and I didn’t sleep with Bob.”

“That is correct,” said Bob. “Nobody switched. We just watched each other.” He blinked. “Part of the time.”

“What the fuck?” groaned Dick.

“Dick, honey, if you don’t want me to lie down on this bed and let Bob slide his enormous, black penis in my pussy, you need to get dressed and get to the kitchen!”

“That’s probably the wrong threat to make,” said Bob. “You should just threaten to cut him off for a few months.”

“Thank you so much for your advice,” said Mona, her voice snarky. “Please keep your enormous, black, penis out of my much-too-small vagina, okay?”

Bob stopped covering himself and put the shorts on.

“Mona, the only way I would ever do that was if you asked me to, and Dick approved it.”

“Dick already approved it,” she snarled.

“Don’t be that way. We all have fantasies. We can’t help it and we can’t choose the fantasies that pop into our heads. When we were shooting your glamour shots, we both had some innocent little fantasies and nothing came of it. Don’t be too hard on him. He’s a good man.”

“And you know this how?”

“Megan was semi passed out, lying on the floor and he walked past her to get some water. He didn’t stop and climb aboard. I don’t think Megan would have stopped him. She likes him, and that puts him in some very rarified air, because Megan doesn’t trust men easily. I’m the first one she said she trusted in fifteen years.”

“Let’s just eat and sober up and then we can talk about fantasies. Okay?”

“Should I put a shirt on?” he asked.

“Please do. Even though that thing hanging between your legs is interesting, and your chest is just gorgeous, I do not feel like getting horny right now.”

“Got it,” said Bob. “I’ll get Dick moving.”

“Thank you.”

She went next to Erica’s room. The teens were sitting on the side of the bed, clothed, now. They both looked forlorn.

“Breakfast is ready. Come eat.”

“Really?” said Erica, who sounded terrified.

“Do you have any diseases that you could have transferred to my son while you were ... having fun?”

“No!” squealed Erica. “I was a virgin before I met Josh!”

“Then come eat breakfast. We can talk about things after that.”

It was eerily silent in the kitchen, with six human beings in a space that was roughly ten by fourteen square feet in size. People brushed up against each other as they moved around, but no apologies were made.

Erica got a box of Cheerios out and somehow knew Josh wanted some of those, too, because she got him a bowl and spoon, too. She and he sat down with Josh on one corner and Erica at the end, next to him. Dick and Mona did the same thing at the other end of the table and Megan and Bob sat side-by-side. Dishes clinked as the plates were passed around. The platter and bowl sat empty, after they made it all the way around the table.

Bob leaned back in his chair, first, wiping his lips and looking around. Everybody else was almost finished, too.

“Well,” he said. “This is awkward, isn’t it.” He said it as a statement, rather than a question.

Everybody was surprised when Mona spoke, next.

“Is it?” she said. “Is there anybody at this table who wishes last night never happened?”

“I thought you felt that way,” said Megan.

“Do you wish last night had never happened?” asked Mona, looking at Megan.

“Only if somebody was hurt by it,” said Megan. “I don’t want anybody to get hurt.”

“I’m not hurt,” said Mona. She looked at her husband. “Are you?” She paused for a few seconds. “You don’t have to answer that. I know you had fun.”

“I’m sorry, Honey,” Dick whined.

“No you’re not, but we’ll discuss that later ... in private.” She looked at Bob. “I’m pretty sure you’re not hurt or sorry.” She looked at Josh and then Erica. “All you two did was what Mother Nature wants all kids your age to do.”

“Really?” Josh sounded amazed.

“We can talk about that in private later, too, if you want to,” she said. “But I suspect you already figured out how it works.”

She looked around.

“I’m just going to say this. We could wail and rant about the probably dozens of cultural rules we violated, or we can accept the fact that our old lives are just fond memories and face the fact that we all have new lives to contend with. That’s how I feel.”